How Do You Mend A Broken Heart

by Ali Vali

  Harry let go immediately thinking she had frightened Desi, causing her to think Desi was afraid of her. "Desi, it's me Harry. You're safe here. I'm not going to hurt you. I just wanted to wake you up before you hurt yourself."

  "Harry?" said Desi in a confused voice. She slowly blinked her eyes open

  "Yes, sweetheart, it's me. Are you okay now?"

  "I'm sorry I woke you up, I was dreaming of Byron and I couldn't get away from him."

  "That's okay, he's not here. No one here wants to hurt you, but you have to be careful with your leg. I know you're probably wild about hospital food, but I don't want to have to take you back to surgery. Do you think you could go back to sleep now?" Harry adjusted her blankets again and smoothed the hair away from Desi's face as a way to further sooth her.

  The last thing Desi wanted was for Harry to leave her alone. It was one of her recurring dreams that all too often became her reality. The feeling of having her feet stuck in molasses while he moved closer, fists clenched tight, that crazed look in his eyes wouldn't release her. He won every night in that dream. She couldn't get away, and he was free to hit her as many times as he wanted, with no one to stop him.

  "Could you sit with me for a little while? You can lie down if you want, I mean you don't have to if you don't want to, but I would appreciate it if you did," babbled Desi.

  "I'll be happy to sit with you."

  Harry lay down and reached under the blanket for Desi's hand. After wrapping it up in hers she felt Desi relax. They didn't need words between them, and soon Harry heard Desi's breathing even out. In her sleep, Desi pulled Harry's hand up onto her chest so she could hold it in both of her own. Harry was touched by the sentiment, but it made her worry Desi wouldn't be there when she woke up, and that this was all a dream.

  "How can I get you back in my life? I think that it's time for us to have a long talk, Ms. Desi, the sooner the better." The wish was spoken softly and Harry felt Desi tighten her hold on her hand.

  ************************************************************************

  The next morning found them back out on the balcony, sipping coffee and eating pastries that Harry had gone out for as soon as she'd gotten dressed. "Do you treat all your houseguests this well?" asked Desi as she bit into her second croissant of the morning.

  "No, no, I don't. Once you're well enough to walk, you'll be expected to pressure wash the house. Have to get a jump on that summer mildew build up, and now I won't have to call the usual guys I hire," said Harry with a straight face.

  "Uh huh, I tell you what, I'll do it if you stand outside in a white t-shirt, Dr. Harry," Desi's face turned crimson the moment the words left her mouth. "I'm sorry, I don't know why I said that." The heat radiating from her ears made Desi want to cover them with her hands to hide the red.

  "Don't look so spooked, sweetheart. Contrary to what my residents think, I still know how to take a joke." She put her coffee cup down and tried to sound as reassuring as possible.

  "I'm still sorry. After everything I've done and put you through I don't have a right to tease you like that."

  "Desi, if I ask you something, would you promise to be honest with me even if you think it'll hurt my feelings?" Harry swung her legs off the chaise lounge so she could face her while they talked.

  "Yes, I can do that," answered Desi nervously. "At least I'll try."

  "Was stepping out of my life your idea? It's okay if you tell me you fell head over heels for Byron, well it won't be okay but….well hell, you know what I mean." The usually confident Harry sat waiting for the answer as she ran her hand through her hair, afraid of what the truth might be.

  Desi decided to just come out with the truth and not make Harry wait anymore than she had to. "It wasn't my idea, it was my father's. He threatened me with not being able to see Rachel again ever. He said he would take her and move somewhere I wouldn't ever find them. Somewhere he could shape her into the kind of person he wouldn't be ashamed of, even if he had to beat her to do it. Somewhere he'd be free to teach her what it was like to be with a man, even if it was him giving the lessons." The feeling of despair returned along with the tears that always fell when she thought of that time.

  "It's all right, I'm right here, and I won't let anything happen to either of you ever again." Harry's voice gave her the strength to go on.

  "I love you, Harry, but after mamma died, Rachel was my only family. The only family I cared about, besides you. She needed me. You know as well as I do that Clyde wasn't the best father in the world, and God only knows what would've happened to her if he'd made good on his threats."

  "No one is blaming you for doing the right thing." It sounded inane to her own ears but Harry meant it.

  "I don't expect you to forgive me," continued Desi, as if Harry hadn't spoken. "How can I, when I can't even forgive myself? But I know this; not one day has gone by in all these years I haven't thought about you. Not one single day when I didn't talk to you and tell you I missed you. I loved you with all my heart back then and I still do. It was like waking up from a nightmare when I saw you in that emergency room. I don't deserve it, but I want to be a part of your life again, even if it's just as your friend." When she finished speaking, Desi tensed up as if expecting a blow to her body, waiting for Harry's reaction.

  Harry just looked at her from the chaise lounge she was sitting on, not saying anything. Great you've scared her off now, was the thought that was playing over and over again in Desi's head. Stuck there because of her injury, she had no choice but to wait and see what Harry would do next.

  In typical Harry style it wasn't what Desi expected at all, but the soft lips on hers were familiar. Giving in to what they had wanted to do from that moment in the hospital, they deepened the kiss. It felt glorious to Desi to sink her hands into those thick black curls and to feel that talented tongue ignite her passion like only Harry could.

  "Like I said, no one will blame you for doing the right thing by Rachel, least of all me. You don't need my forgiveness, Desi, because there's nothing to forgive."

  Desi clung to her and buried her face in Harry's neck getting her collar all wet. "But I've brought you so much pain. How can you still be so giving?"

  "Because anything worth having is worth any pain you have to endure to get it. Having you back here is what matters to me, but no walking out on me this time. You do and I'll be lost," whispered Harry in her ear.

  "I missed you and I'm not going anywhere." Desi told her as she leaned in to kiss Harry again. "I may never want to stop doing this now."

  "I don't want you to stop." Harry leaned back to look into Desi's eyes.

  They were the one feature of Desi's that had haunted Harry for years. Those soft green orbs that reminded Harry of summer grass, that spoke volumes as to what was in Desi's head and heart. They had little flecks of gold sprinkled in them that Harry always thought held a sort of magic Desi had used to snare her love.

  Expanding her line of sight out a little, Harry took in Desi's face. There were little lines around her eyes, but that was just from all the smiles that had creased Desi's face over the years. Desi's creamy skin hadn't changed much since the last time Harry had run her fingers over the surface. But every so often, she found small scars that were testament of Byron's brutality. For Harry, they didn't ruin or mar the image, only proved to her how brave Desi had been to survive the ordeal.

  "What are you looking at?" asked Desi leaning into Harry's touch.

  "I'm looking at you. Do you realize how beautiful you are to me? I've seen this face in my dreams for so long now, I think I have it memorized. But I find myself looking at you now, and falling in love all over again."

  "Thank you for the sentiment, honey, but I think my time of beauty has past. I'm not eighteen anymore. I'm reminded of that every time I look in the mirror. It seems like every day something sags a little lower than it did the day before, and I'm so tired."

  "Desi, honey, you're thirty-four years old, not exactly grandmother
material. I love looking at you, so don't argue with me. And if you want my official diagnosis as to why you are so tired, it's because you were unhappy, sweetheart. Not to worry though, I have a prescription for that, guaranteed to perk you up permanently."

  "Oh yeah, doctor, what might that be?" asked Desi. Her answer came in the form of a kiss and two strong arms that held her tight.

  By making Desi happy it was a case of physician heal thyself for Harry. They would try and start over from the foundation they had built on a porch swing so many nights before. But after all that time, would it be enough?

  Comments to: terrali20@yahoo.com

  How Do You Mend A Broken Heart

  Ali Vali

  Chapter 3

  "All rise, the court is now in session, the Honorable Judge Rose presiding," said the bailiff, Rudy Thibodaux. The old courtroom was packed with lawyers and defendants ready to enter their pleas. For his part, Judge Jude Rose hated Mondays.

  The filth of the streets oozed into his domain on that day of the week, ready to exclaim their innocence to all who would listen. The worst part of the whole ordeal was he couldn't tell the attorneys apart from their clients anymore. Jude had watched over the years as petty drug dealers and ambulance chasing young attorneys, waiting to carve out their niche in the law industry, had overrun the city.

  From his perch high above the fray, he looked out of the big windows onto Tulane Avenue, remembering his first time in this courtroom. As a young law student he had come after classes to watch the trial of Clay Shaw play itself out in the national headlines. It had been a time of good lawyering and a fair debate of both sides of the law. Now the building was full of those who sold nickel bags of crack cocaine, rapists, the big lugs who liked to beat up on their wives, and the new breed of bottom feeding lawyers who defended them.

  Seeing the beautifully dressed Serena Ladding with a pile of files on the table made him guess today would be 'She asked for it, your honor,' day. It was such a lovely way to start the morning. "Ms. Ladding, what do you have for me today? Do you think we'll be finished by noon?" asked Jude.

  "Forty eight cases, your honor, all pleadings, so we should be out of here by ten if everyone is present and there aren't any unexpected surprises."

  "Good, let's get started, shall we." He cocked his chair back a little and adjusted the pistol he kept on his hip. In his time on the bench he'd only had occasion to fire it once, and New Orleans legend had it that the whole building had come to a stand still for almost five minutes.

  The first thirty defendants plead guilty after cutting deals with the district attorney's office. No jail time for their crimes, if they signed up for individual and family therapy. Serena wasn't a big fan of therapy, but it was the best they could offer with the jail-overcrowding situation the city faced.

  In her opinion, after a few weeks with the shrink these guys came to realize it was all their mother's fault they did what they did. If only mommy dearest had had the foresight to leave dear old dad, then they wouldn't have learned their behavior. As one man had told her once, when she had met with him and his attorney, 'You see, Ms. Ladding, I'm an abuser but I've got a good reason, it's all my bitch of a mother's fault.' It was a crock then and it was a crock now.

  "On the last case, your honor, we request the Court remand Mr. Byron Simoneaux into custody due to the vicious, unprovoked attack on his wife, Desiree Simoneaux. Mrs. Simoneaux had to undergo extensive surgery to repair the damage done to her person by Byron Simoneaux. It's the opinion of the District Attorney's office that Mr. Simoneaux would pose a threat to his wife if allowed out on bail. Our office plans to move forward with charges of attempted murder and assault with a deadly weapon." Serena finished and turned to Byron and his attorney to see what bullshit issued forth.

  "Your honor, Mr. Simoneaux is a law abiding citizen who doesn't even have as much as an outstanding parking ticket. He works hard and is being unjustly accused by a woman who wants out of her marriage, and plans to stick my client with a large alimony tab," started Bradley Blum, Byron's attorney.

  The chair creaked as Jude swung it around and looked at Rudy and cocked a brow at the man in question. After spending years working together the bailiff smiled in understanding and adjusted his utility belt. "Bradley Blum, your honor, defense attorney for Mr. Simoneaux."

  "Mr. Blum, have I addressed you?" asked Judge Rose, his chair came back down, and he pinned the young man with his infamous glare when he looked down from the bench.

  "No, sir," answered Bradley, swallowing hard.

  "Then why are you talking?" The tone of Jude's voice, and the way he was now leaning forward showed his displeasure.

  "I just wanted to explain our position, your honor."

  "You're talking again. My suggestion to you, Mr. Blum, is simple. You should take your cues from Ms. Ladding here and speak only when spoken to. Do you understand me, Mr. Blum?" asked Judge Rose. The way Jude kept repeating his name made Bradley think the judge wouldn't soon forget him. If that were the case, it wouldn't bode well for future appearances in his court.

  The courtroom fell silent, waiting for the explosion that would surely be coming from the bench at any moment. Jude was famous for chewing these young guns up and spitting them out, making their clients question the wisdom of their choice of representation. Two minutes ticked by with no sound breaking except the ticking of the clock over the door. "I'm waiting, Mr. Blum, do you understand me?" asked Jude again as he reclined back in his leather chair.

  "I'm sorry, your honor, I thought you told me not to talk," explained the now sweating Bradley. From the prosecutor's table Serena was trying valiantly to hide her smile behind her hand. She had been in Blum's place only once, and it had been an experience she never cared to repeat.

  "I asked you a question, you idiot," screamed Jude.

  "Yes, your honor, I understand you."

  "Good, now, Ms. Ladding, what's the extent of Mrs. Simoneaux's injuries?" He never looked at her, keeping his eyes glued to one of the light fixtures in the room.

  Serena went on to explain the nature and extent of Desi's injuries, and what Harry had done to repair them. She also explained a baseball bat found in the Simoneaux home had caused the injuries, and currently was in police custody in the evidence room, covered in Byron's fingerprints and Desi's blood.

  "Thank you, Ms. Ladding. Now, Mr. Blum, let's hear from you." After laying out the reasons for allowing his client to be released on bond, Bradley judiciously fell silent waiting for Jude to rule on bail. Feeling Byron fidgeting beside him wearing his bright orange prison jumpsuit, Bradley made a mental note to tell him that Jude Rose never heard domestic violence cases, so there would be no repeat of today.

  "In deference to this being Mr. Simoneaux's first criminal charge, I here by post bond in the amount of three and a half million dollars in cash or property. Thank you ladies and gentlemen, we're adjourned." With that Jude got up, readjusted the pistol under his robes, and walked out. Serena felt confident that having to put up four hundred and twenty thousand dollars for his share of the bail would keep Byron sitting in city jail for many days to come.

  She walked out of the courtroom, through the curses hurled her way by Byron's family, heading toward her office. She had noticed the Simoneaux clan when she had gotten there that morning, thinking Byron and his brother Mike took after their father in looks. His mother looked like a small meek woman who was afraid of the large overweight man sitting beside her. Serena was sure his eldest son had learned how to deal with women from Byron, Sr.

  From her office in the building where Jude's courtroom was located, Serena called Harry's house and spoke to Desi about the morning's proceedings. If Byron's attorney fast tracked the trial they could be back in court by the end of the month, which was fine with Serena. That would mean Desi would be sitting on the witness stand testifying with a cast on her leg, making what her husband did to her, that much more real.

  "Thank you, Serena, I appreciate you calling me. Is it
all right if I call Harry and let her know what's going on? She left early this morning, but I have her cell phone number in case I have to get in touch with her."

  The explanation was longer than it had to be, but Serena understood where the need for confirmation was coming from. Women like Desi had learned, through violence, to never assume they could just do something without permission. When they did, it usually meant a beating. Hopefully with time and with Harry's loving guidance, Desi would find her self worth again. "No, that won't be a problem. Call her and tell her whatever you want. It'll be good for you to have someone to talk to during all this stuff. Because believe me, you'll have to deal with Byron's family, as well as your wonderful husband."

  "Yeah, when Byron and Mike get together and start drinking, they are a force to be reckoned with. Add their father into that mix and it's total disaster for whatever or whoever gets in their way. Do you think Harry will be in any danger?" She bit her lip after asking, the thought popping into her head for the first time.

  "If your in-laws know what's good for them, they'll stay the hell away from Harry. The Goddess of the Bones is a wonderful healer, but on the flip side, she can just as easily break every bone in your body. Harry studied martial arts in college, and when you combine that with her medical training, she knows all the places to hit you that'll count."

  She studied her broken leg and thought about what Serena had said after hanging up the phone. Would Harry hurt her, and was she exchanging one bad situation for something worse? She couldn't fathom Harry ever lifting a hand to hit her, but she hadn't seen Harry in years. Sometimes things changed. She put the receiver down, deciding to wait to call the surgeon. There was no reason to disturb her if she didn't have to.

  Harry wasn't expected home until eight or nine due to a back up in surgery, so when Desi heard the side door into the kitchen close, she wondered who it was. Looking at the digital clock next to the bed she noticed it was three thirty in the afternoon. She had slept longer than she had planned after her conversation with Serena, and now that she was well rested but still groggy, wondered what she was going to do with herself for the rest of the day.