I Need A Gangsta (Gucci Gang Saga Book 1)

by B. Love

  “Let me talk to Don and Drecco. If they agree, you got a deal.”

  Maria stood and walked over to his side of the desk to hug his neck. They continued to talk until the ten minutes were up, then Pressure locked his office up and walked her back outside. At the sight of Pressure, Vincent took a step back as he took in his height and build. Pressure provided just that to the streets — Pressure. Weight. Force. No nigga fucked with him.

  “You know who I am?” Pressure asked Vincent. “Whatever you do to her, I got niggas that’ll do it to you. Feel me?”

  He nodded and smiled nervously. “We good, big brotha.”

  Sitting across from Vincent, she checked her phone again, unable to hide her pout at the lack of communication from Jax. She couldn’t help but text him as Vincent looked over the menu because she already knew what she would order.

  How long you gonna be mad at me?

  His dots popped up immediately, but he didn’t text back.

  So you gon act like you don’t see my text?

  His dots popped up again, but he said nothing.

  Bet!

  Chucking her phone onto the table, Maria finally gave Vincent her attention.

  “You good?” She nodded. “What’s up with you and Jax? Is that something I need to be worried about?”

  Maria smiled as she shook her head. “You say that as if you and I have a chance. We aren’t at the level for you to even be worried about another man.”

  “Yet, but now that you’ve given me an in, I’m going to make the most of it.”

  “Why do you want an in? You don’t even know me.”

  “I know enough to want to know more.”

  Their eyes remained locked as the waitress came over to take their order. Maria got her usual — smothered chicken, cabbage, and candied yams with a HI-C to drink — and Vincent ended up getting the same with a Coke.

  When Maria’s phone vibrated in her lap, she hurriedly looked down at it, hoping it was Jax, but it was Pressure.

  Pressure: Good to go.

  Cool. I’ll talk it over with Nash.

  Pressure: One love.

  One love.

  Putting her phone back down, Maria looked Vincent’s features over. There was something familiar about him, but she couldn’t place where she knew him from. She decided to take that time to ask him about himself, half-listening for clues. They didn’t go to the same school together, and they weren’t from the same neighborhood. Maria wouldn’t brush it off, but she wouldn’t overthink where she knew him from, either.

  It didn’t take long for their food to be delivered, and it was good, as always. When Maria finally started to let her guard down, she began to enjoy Vincent’s conversation. There was no spark between them like with Jax, but it was cool. She had to admit, it felt pretty good talking to a man and not finding reasons to cut him off before she really even gave him a chance. For literally years, she’d been giving men the hardest of times… putting them in positions where only the strong would survive.

  But tonight… tonight was refreshing.

  Her every thought wasn’t consumed with Malibu, and when she finally stopped obsessing over it, she didn’t think about Jax, either. She simply allowed herself to enjoy being with a man.

  When their night was over, they exchanged numbers, and Vincent asked if he could take her on a real date. She agreed, to both of their surprise, then headed home. Maria assumed Vincent went right back to the set they were at because about ten minutes after they parted ways, Jax called her. At first, she ignored his call, but when he called right back, she answered.

  “Hello?”

  “You have fun? He came back early, so I know he ain’t get no pussy.”

  Her mouth carved out a smirk. “You think I’m that easy?”

  “Was I special enough for you to try to give it to me on our first date?”

  Maria smiled, then licked her lips. “You were special to me, Jax. I let you into my home, my head, and my heart.”

  “…So what happened?”

  What happened?

  She happened.

  Her mind happened.

  Malibu happened.

  “I came out of that moment and back to reality. I like you, Jax, I really do, but I can’t…” Her head shook and she bit down on her bottom lip hard. “If you don’t know that pain…”

  “Baby…” His voice was light. Soft. Strained. Made her heart ache. “I will never try to downplay your pain. All I want is a chance to love it out of you. But I can’t do that if you won’t let me in.” Maria blinked rapidly as her chin trembled. This was exactly why she’d been avoiding Jax for as long as she had. Good or bad — he made her feel — and she could do without that shit. “If you want me to chase you, I will. As long as I know that I’ll catch you in the end. But if you can’t guarantee me that… I gotta cut you loose. And when I do, it ain’t gon’ be none of this back and forth shit. I promise you that. You need to make up your mind, Maria.”

  She nodded as if he could see her. “Can I just… have some time? T—to get my mind right. If we do this, I want to be able to be open and give us a real chance.”

  Jax thought it over for a few seconds before agreeing with, “That’s cool, beautiful. You know how to find me when you’re ready.”

  “Okay.”

  It took her a second because she honestly didn’t want their conversation to end, but eventually, she disconnected the call. When she did, she saw that she had a text from Vincent, thanking her for letting him take her to dinner and telling her to let him know when she made it home.

  There was no doubt in Maria’s mind that being with Vincent would have been a hell of a lot easier than Jax. Not just to her mind and heart, but her sanity as well. He was safer — in the sense of not being locked up or killed because he was in the streets — and to her heart. She didn’t see herself submitting to him and falling head over heels in love with him as she did Jax. Maria had very little experience in the dating field, and a part of her felt as if she needed to work herself up to being with a man like Jax.

  So she would use and entertain Vincent until she was ready. And all she could do was hope that Jax was still interested when the time came.

  12

  Them

  “So how are we going to handle this?” Christian asked, leg shaking under the table. She’d just gotten some fucked-up news from Leigh, and this was not the turn in her day she wanted or needed.

  Leigh shrugged and released a heavy breath. “I don’t know, Gucci. Money said he doesn’t want a sit down with you or Ransom unless it’s to confirm you’ll be giving him a cut of your business and settling on that percentage.”

  Maria sat up in her seat with a shake of her head. “Man, say. I will rob the fuck outta this nigga and set you up to pay him with his own money if he really wanna take it there.”

  Christian and Leigh smiled, only because they knew she was dead fucking serious. Maria didn’t play that robbing a nigga of his money shit, but she was quick to do it if someone needed to be taught a humbling lesson.

  “He got too many guards on him at all times,” Leigh warned. “But that would be petty as hell, though.”

  “Mane, what,” Christian agreed. “I need something more permanent, though. I’ve worked too hard to differentiate myself from the rest of the dealers in Memphis. This is my shit, and I don’t want him attached to it in any way.”

  Leigh sat back in her seat as she licked her lips. “So what you wanna do? I can tell him no on your behalf, but shit will go left if I do. Our best bet will be to try and attack before he does, because the nigga will come for you and Ransom.”

  “Have you talked to him about this to see where his head is at?”

  Leigh’s head shook. She’d shared with them the turn her situation with Ransom had taken, because she knew it would be awkward if ever they were around each other again.

  “Nah. His ass still got me blocked, so I can’t talk to him about shit.”

  Maria chuckled as sh
e pulled her phone out. “Want me to call him?”

  Leigh shrugged and looked away. “I don’t give a fuck. At this point, my only concern is my sister.”

  “Now you know that’s a damn lie,” Christian denied. “You love that man and you care about him. Stop being so stubborn and stupid and go after what you want.”

  Leigh looked from Christian to Maria, who was nodding in agreement. “This ain’t about my personal life; this is about business. What you want me to say?”

  Christian ran her hand down her neck as she considered her options. “Tell him to let me think on it for a while.”

  “Okay, but I can’t promise you he will actually wait.”

  Nodding in agreement, Christian picked up her spiked lemonade and took a long gulp. Not wanting to think on it for too long and have her mood or their lunch ruined, she changed the subject with, “Soooo, Tyrell wants me to meet his family soon, and I am not with the shits…”

  Christian’s day had already been crazy, and it was just getting started. She’d been at her bakery from six to one and had lunch with her sisters from two to three. Now, she was on her way to meet Tyrell at his mother’s house for the first time. Even though they’d been together for a couple of years, she hadn’t met anyone in his family. That wasn’t his doing; it was hers.

  Meeting the family was too serious of a thing. The only reason Tyrell knew as many people connected to her as he did was because, with her lifestyle, they felt it was necessary. You never could be too sure who you could trust in Memphis when you were making money… especially if it was drug money. So Nash and Ransom had made it their responsibility to know every man she fucked with — as if she didn’t have fifty million brothers doing the same thing.

  Since things had been going so well between them, Tyrell wanted Christian to finally meet the two most important people in his life: his mother and his brother. She yelped at the sight of his car in the driveway. Not a lot of things put fear in her heart, but the thought of meeting Tyrell’s mother had her shaking in her seat. Not so much because she felt the woman would be mean or disrespectful, but because of what this moment meant. Things would only get more serious from here, and Christian had to take some time to decide if she was truly ready for it.

  As she parked her car a couple of feet up from the mailbox, Christian exhaled a deep breath. Praying Tyrell wouldn’t spot her outside, Christian quickly called her mother. It was a habit — calling her mother to talk about her father, hoping something she said would keep her from being with a man like him. It took some years, but Porsha eventually found someone else. Derrick. Unfortunately, it was clear with how she was with him that she didn’t love him as openly and deeply as Ricky, and Christian hated her father even more because of that.

  Because he’d put her mother in a position to halfheartedly love. To fear being hurt and burned all over again, so she keeps herself from getting too close. Derrick didn’t seem to mind. He loved her unconditionally, without care or concern for the ways she held back. And in that sense, Christian believed her mother was truly blessed. She did, however, pray that her mother realized what she had in Derrick before it was too late. Porsha didn’t want to remarry or give Derrick children, and while he loved Christian and her sisters as his own… he also made it clear that he wanted his own.

  “You change your mind,” was Porsha’s greeting, making Christian smile.

  She shook her head softly. “Not yet. Thinkin’ about it.”

  “Why?”

  Christian released a sigh as she looked at the front door. Her head lowered as it shook again. “I don’t want marriage to be next. Well, I do, but I’m just scared.”

  “Of what?”

  Looking off to the side, Christian swallowed hard as her eyes watered. Flaring nostrils released a shaky breath before she inhaled deeply and dried her eyes.

  “Being hurt. Being made a fool of. Finding out one day that he is full of lies and I snap and fucking kill him.”

  Porsha’s soft laugh made Christian smile, even though she was dead serious. After everything she’d shared with Tyrell about her past… if he ever lied about something serious or cheated… she was liable to have a Snapped moment. It would have been different if he had no idea about what she’d been through, but Christian made it clear what her father had done, and how it destroyed their family and damaged her childhood. She made it clear that she didn’t tolerate lying and cheating.

  So if he violated in that way, she wouldn’t be responsible for how she reacted.

  “Well, Chris, we emulate what we see in our childhood, or we do whatever it takes to avoid reliving our childhood through our spouses and children. It’s up to you to decide if the role you take on as a girlfriend, mother, and wife will be the role you saw in me. It’s also up to you to decide if the man you spend your life with will be anything like your father.

  They lie, and they cheat, but some of them are good. You find out by asking the right questions, spending time, trusting your intuition, and never ignoring the signs. Have you done that with Tyrell?”

  “To an extent. Some things he’s done, I let ride and ignored the signs because I felt like I was overreacting.”

  “You’ll need to decide if you really were overreacting, or if that was your warning. But no one else can figure that out for you. You have to. If they were warnings and you ignored them, the truth will come out in due time. And yes, it will hurt. You will be angry. But you’re my daughter, and you will survive.”

  Christian’s eyes closed. She inhaled a deep breath and allowed her mother’s words to resonate within her. When she opened her eyes, she agreed with, “You’re right, Mommy. I love you.”

  “I love you, too, baby. Call me and let me know how it goes.”

  Christian agreed and quickly disconnected the call to answer Nash’s. She hadn’t talked to him in a week or so. After their odd exchange on Valentine’s day, neither made much effort to reach out to the other. Christian sent him the usual good morning text that she sent all of her family and close friends, and he would reply. But they wouldn’t talk again until he texted her goodnight. While she hated the strain on their friendship, Christian didn’t know how to fix it because she didn’t know what the issue was. She meant to talk to him about it the day before Valentine’s day, but the day and night went so beautifully, she didn’t want to ruin it with deep, energy-shifting topics.

  “What’s up?” she answered after cutting her car off and disconnecting the call from her Bluetooth.

  “That ain’t how you answer the phone for me.”

  Christian licked her lips as she smiled. “Nash,” she greeted, imagining him biting down on his lip at the sound of her saying his name.

  “I miss you.”

  Her chest tightened. Stomach churned. It literally felt like her insides were twisting as her heart dropped. Mouth opened partially, Christian squeezed the back of her neck.

  “I miss you, too. What’s going on with us, Nash? And I don’t want no excuses about our busy schedules because that’s never been an issue for us in the past. Something is off.”

  He sighed in the phone. “You’re right. Slide through tonight. We need to talk.”

  We need to talk.

  Jesus.

  That was never good.

  Tugging her ear, Christian thought over what Nash could possibly need to talk to her about one on one. Had he gotten some bad news? Was he sick? Did he finally commit to Pinky?

  Not wanting to stress herself over the possibilities, Christian nodded and agreed with, “Okay. It’ll be after seven. I’ll let you know when I’m on my way.”

  “Cool… Chris?”

  For some reason, the softness of his tone made her heart ache. It took her a few seconds to even reply. “Yeah?”

  “I love you. No matter what. Aight?”

  “What does that… what does that mean?”

  “I’ll see you tonight.”

  “Nash…”

  Nash disconnected the call, and Christian groa
ned as she slammed her hand against the steering wheel. Now she really didn’t want to meet Tyrell’s mother. Not while her mood was fucked up. And she couldn’t take an edible, because she didn’t know how long she would be there. Depending on how big of a piece she ate of the laced cookie she had in her purse, it could hit her within minutes, or in an hour. The bigger the piece, the longer it took — but the high was strong as fuck and would last for hours.

  Wanting to go ahead and get her meeting with his mother over, Christian got out of her car and leaned against the door. Resisting the urge to pull out something to calm her nerves, she embraced how she felt. There was no point in trying to numb her anxiousness; it would return as soon as she was on her way to Nash. Christian pulled out her phone and sent Tyrell a text, letting him know she was outside.

  When she heard the door open and close, she turned and walked to the other side of her car. At the sight of Tyrell walking over to her, she smiled. He was truly handsome, and even though they had their issues, she was happy to have him in her life. No one was perfect, and every relationship had their issues. All she could do was pray that their issues never became the reason she had to walk away.

  Tyrell pressed his body into hers and placed a kiss to her lips immediately. As if he’d been missing her like crazy and couldn’t even speak before getting a taste of her lips. Instead of pulling away immediately, Tyrell placed his hands on both sides of her, resting them on the top of her car. He grazed her nose with his before kissing her again, making her smile.

  “Thank you for agreeing to meet my folks. I know this ain’t your typical vibe.”

  Wrapping her arms around his neck, Christian stared into his eyes. “It’s not, but I think it’s time.”

  Tyrell chuckled. “It’s past time, Chris. I wanted you to meet them a month in.”