Restrained: A Bad Boy MMA Fighter Romance (Warrior Zone Fighters Book 4)

by Tia Lewis

  The tapping on my window woke me up out of a dead sleep. I sat up, wiping the sleep out of my eyes as I looked at the clock. Freaking two a.m. Who the heck was waking me up at this hour? I had a test tomorrow, and if I didn’t pass the damn thing, I was gonna fail that class. With a grumble, I slung my legs over the side of the bed and tugged on the long t-shirt I used as a nightgown as I walked over to the window. It was probably Luke, unable to get into the house after dad barred the door. I warned him about bailing after our curfew, but he wasn’t going to listen. He was as hard headed as he looked.

  I pushed out the window and was surprised to see Benji standing there. He was so gorgeous, and I instantly started checking my hair with my hands, attempting to smooth down my bedhead. “Benji?”

  He looked at me. “Shit, Danielle. Sorry, I thought this was Luke’s room.”

  “Um no problem,” I squeaked out, hoping I wasn’t killing him over with my morning breath. It was then that I noticed the scratches on his face. “What happened?”

  He touched his face, his expression angry. “It’s ma. She’s off the chain again. I can’t do it anymore.”

  Despite my attire, I climbed out of the window and landed on the ground mere inches from my window sill, leaving the window open and hoping I could get back in. Benji leaned against the wooden slats of the house, anger radiating off him. “I’m leaving.”

  “What?” I asked softly, my heart in my throat. He couldn’t leave! “Where will you go?”

  He shrugged, looking far older than seventeen. “I dunno. West maybe. I hear there are some fighting gyms in Cali that I can sign with.”

  “That’s crazy. You don’t have any money.”

  He turned toward me, and I could see the determination in his eyes. He was doing this. He was going to leave. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll find it somehow. I can’t stay Dannie. She attacked me tonight, and it took all I could to hold her down before she gouged out my eyeballs.”

  “B-but you got one year left of school,” I urged, knowing I had to keep him here. Luke would be so mad that Benji was no longer around and I would be devastated. “You can move in with us.”

  He pushed away from the wall and stuck his hands into his pockets. “I’m gone, Dannie. Tell Luke, tell him he was my best friend, like a brother to me and not to worry. I’ll send word when I get settled.”

  I bit my lip as tears threatened my eyes, throwing my arms around his neck to keep him here, with us. “No, don’t do this.”

  I felt him stiffen before his arms came around me, holding me tightly against him. The tears soaked through his shirt as I breathed in his scent, worried that this was going to be the last time I saw him. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, his hand stilling on my back. “I have to go.”

  I looked up at him, seeing the emotion in his eyes as he looked at me. There was something there, something I hadn’t seen before and I was suddenly all too aware of him against me, the way his hands were on my back, seeping through the thin material of my shirt. “Kiss me,” I blurted out.

  His eyes widened. “What?”

  I swallowed hard. “Kiss me, please. I want you to be my first kiss.”

  “Dannie, I.”

  I cut him off, hanging onto his neck for dear life. “If you are gonna leave, then leave, but I have dreamed of you being my first kiss.” There. I had said it. My cheeks burned with embarrassment at what I had been brave enough to say to him of all people, but if I was to never see him again, then it didn’t matter.

  Benji leaned down, and I closed my eyes, feeling his lips brush over mine once, then twice before he pressed them harder against my own trembling ones. Suddenly I was lost in the sensation, the warmth of his lips against mine, the way my stomach was all tied up in knots as I realized I was kissing Benji Lomns. How many times had I dreamed about this moment?

  His hand dropped from my back to cup my cheek, the electricity traveling through my skin as my heart nearly burst out of my chest. Never having kissed anyone before, I didn’t know what to do and when he pulled away, I found myself wanting more, so much more.

  “Shit Dannie,” he whispered his eyes searching mine, his palm warm against my cheek. “I shouldn’t be doing this.”

  “I asked for it,” I said bravely, looking at him. “Don’t go, please.”

  He swallowed hard and dropped his hand, stepping out of my reach unless I wanted to drag my feet through the mud. “I, bye Dannie. Take care of yourself.”

  I watched with tingling lips and a broken heart as Benji disappeared into the night, wishing that he would come back. He had to come back.

  Benji

  I was fucking tired. Picking up the bowl of mashed carrots that smelled like ass, I walked back into the living room where I had left Amelia, a happy baby in her playpen courtesy of Hannah. How people did this on their own was beyond me, and I wanted to give a hefty donation to the single mother’s fund for having to do this from day one. It was only day three for me, and I wasn’t so sure I was going to round out the week.

  “I got your food,” I said softly as I carefully picked her up and set her on my shoulder, feeling the immediate wetness from her drooling mouth seep through my t-shirt. At least it was drool. I had dealt with shit yesterday, literal shit, all over her so bad that I had to give her a bath. Well, bath was a liberal word. It was more like a dunking in the sink because Hannah had failed to show me that small tidbit.

  Still, she had survived one full day with me, and I could chalk that up as a win. Sitting her in the high chair at the island, I sat the bowl in front of me, the spoon already slippery in my grasp. “You make me sweat more than a fucking newbie in the cage,” I said to her, her eyes following me as I stirred the carrots. “Don’t let fuck be your first word or Hannah will never forgive me.”

  Truth be told, I wouldn’t even be this far without my friends. They had taken over that first night, getting the supplies and Tony lending me the shoulder I needed when the world came crashing down around me. I wasn’t a crier, but hell I had cried like a damn baby that night after Hannah had taken Amelia to bed. I was a fucking father. I wasn’t even fucking father material, and now I was in charge of this precious life in my arms. It was no longer about being fair, but more like how anyone could trust me with this baby. I had two options. I could raise her as my own or give her away. That was what Hannah had read to me the next day online. I could put her into a family who was desperate for a baby, a loving family with their shit in order and the ability to take care of a child.

  But I had balked at the idea. She was mine, my flesh and blood. I was the only family she had left. The detective had called me earlier today to tell me just that. Amelia’s mom had no other surviving family members. I was it.

  Amelia made a noise, and I looked up to see her scrunching up her face. “Shit, sorry,” I said, scooping up a spoonful of carrots. “I guess you have been waiting for me to start, haven’t you?”

  She gave a sound close to a yes as I got the spoon in her mouth, some of the orange stuff dribbling out the corner of her mouth as she mulled around if she was going to keep it there or not. I silently prayed that she was. I hated carrots.

  Turns out, she did too. No sooner than the thought crossed my mind, I found myself wearing carrots, dripping down my face and all over my shirt. I gave her an eye as I put the bowl down, seeing that her outfit I had just dressed her in was now covered in the orange mess. “Really? Couldn’t you just tell me that you didn’t want them?”

  Her toothy grin was all I got back. I grinned, only because she was so damn cute and stood as a knock sounded on the door. Relief I could only hope. Crossing the apartment, I opened the door and stared at the woman on the other side. “Danielle.”

  She gave me a little wave, looking vaguely unsure about being here, a bag slung over her shoulder. “Um hi, Benji. I was just in the neighborhood and thought I would drop in on you and Amelia to see how you both are getting along.”

  I chuckled, looking down at my carrot covered t-shir
t. “Oh, we are getting along just great as you can tell.”

  She laughed, and I pushed open the door. “Come on in, but I will warn you, she’s locked and loaded with carrots.”

  Danielle stepped through the doorway, and I caught a whiff of vanilla as she passed by me, taking me back to a place I had long left in my mind. Danielle Parkman. I hadn’t seen her since I had left home over nine years ago and we both had changed a great deal since then. Out of her uniform, I took in the nice shapely curve of her body, the way her long dark hair draped down her back. I swallowed as I took in her ass, nicely outlined in her worn jeans. Danielle fucking Parkman. A blast from the past.

  “Oh, my goodness, you are a mess,” she was saying as she leaned forward to talk with Amelia, dropping the bag on the chair. “Are we bathing in carrots now?”

  I shut the door, willing the sudden hard on to disappear. Damn. “Apparently so.”

  She was already reaching for Amelia when I turned around, not caring that the baby was smearing carrots all over her shirt as well. “I don’t mind cleaning her up for you if you just point me in the right direction.”

  “Down the hall, to the left. I think her pajamas are still on the sink.”

  She gave me a radiant smile as she moved down the hall and I made myself not look at her ass again. It was like a white-hot lightning bolt straight to the groin. I turned away, stripping my shirt off as I did. So, she was a police officer. I found that hard to believe, knowing that she had never once mentioned wanting to be one in all the years I knew her. Well, it wasn’t like I was really listening either. She had been Luke’s bratty sister up until the night I had decided I had enough of my shitty life and decided to leave. For some reason, I had missed Luke’s window that night and had found Danielle instead. That night, she had looked different to me, and her pleading with me had almost caused me to stay. Almost. For days after, I had thought about her and the innocent kiss we had shared as I had trekked across Illinois, eventually winding up in Nebraska where I took odd jobs to survive. I found an underground fighting ring there and the rest was history. I had worked my ass off to get where I was at, to leave the past behind and forget how I had started out. I wasn’t the same kid. Hell, I wasn’t even the same adult anymore, especially not now.

  Rubbing a hand over my face, I threw the shirt in the laundry basket that was sitting on the floor beside the couch. Despite our history and the old feelings seeing her was drumming up, I was glad she had decided to stop by. I fell onto the couch, propping my feet up as I waited for them to finish in the bathroom so I could clean up myself. I had taken some time off from the gym to get Amelia settled in and try to figure out what the hell I was going to do, but I was going to have to go back. I still had a match, an important one, to train for. I wasn’t about to let that opportunity slip through my fingers, even if I had to drag Amelia to the gym with me. The title was mine.

  Leaning my head back on the couch, I looked up at the ceiling and grinned as I heard a squeal from the bathroom, the splashing of water following close behind. I should go check on them, but it felt so damn good to sit down for a moment, the exhaustion starting to creep in my veins. Amelia had slept hardly any last night, and I had been wide awake, worried that she was going to smother herself to death or fall out of the playpen that I had set up. Her furniture was on its way, and I didn’t trust myself to have her sleep in the bed with me, so the playpen was all I had at the moment. Apparently, she was not so accepting of the damn thing the way she had hollered. “Shit,” I said softly, rubbing my eyes. I wasn’t going to give up. I could do this. I could be the father that Amelia deserved. It was going to take some time though, time that was going to have to be shared with my fighting.

  Danielle

  “You are such a good girl,” I said, touching my finger to the baby’s nose. “And smell so much better.”

  She laughed as I picked her up in my arms, holding her close for a moment. I was glad to see that the baby was happy, clearly not suffering from the fact that her mother was no longer on earth. Benji, however, looked worse for wear and I could see the dark circles under his eyes, the exhaustion lines on his face. “Are you wearing out your daddy?” I said to the one-year-old, tickling her stomach. She laughed, and my heart warmed. Maybe I was wrong about Benji. Maybe he could make this child happy in her life. After all, he hadn’t dumped her off with anyone else and by the looks of it, was attempting to make this work out the best he knew how. “I think you are going to be a very lucky little girl,” I said to Amelia as we walked out of the bathroom back toward the living room. I wasn’t so sure of why I had decided to come by today. Finding Benji’s address had been easy, and I was surprised to see the high-rise apartment in the heart of Chicago as a result. Clearly, life had been good to Benji the last few years.

  And he had let me in without a word. My mind was still reeling because of that. We barely knew each other as adults, yet he was trusting me with his child. I tried not to think too much into it. After all, we hadn’t seen each other in years. I know I had changed and I was certain he had as well. As I walked into the living room, my heart literally seized in my chest as I took in the sight before me. Benji was sprawled out on the couch, his feet propped up on the coffee table, asleep. But that wasn’t what had me experiencing heart palpitations.

  Benji was naked from the waist up, his sweatpants riding dangerously low on his waist, so low I could see the jutting out of his hip bones just peeking out over the band. The years had been kind to him, his chest broad and well defined, his stomach nothing but a mass of muscles with a sprinkling of blond hair trickling down to his waistband. Dear Lord. That was enough to make imaginations run wild.

  My cheeks heated as I ogled him, Amelia squirming in my arms to get down. I couldn’t turn away. My hands were itching to just touch him once, to feel his muscles bunch under my fingers as his arms wrapped around me. “Oh my god,” I whispered furiously, walking over quietly to deposit the squirming child in her playpen. I was overreacting. I wasn’t going to be touching Benji, and he wasn’t going to be holding me. Childish fantasies of a young, foolish girl needed to go. I wasn’t ready for another man in my life. I looked back at the precious child playing with her toys, my heart aching. But I was ready for that. I had always been ready for that. My own child’s death had left a gaping hole in my heart, one that could not be replaced but it could be filled.

  But not by this family. Not by Amelia or even Benji. I was here to help. I had gone to the store before heading over, grabbing anything I thought Benji probably hadn’t gotten so far. Things like extra clothes, diapers, baby food, though it looked as if someone had helped him out with the playpen and the other clothes scattered around the apartment. I placed my hands on my hips as I surveyed the apartment, with its granite countertops and stainless steel appliances. Not typically the place one would be raising a child. But the place was also cluttered with takeout boxes and clothes everywhere as if Benji stripped wherever he was standing.

  My body squirmed at the thought, and I pushed it away immediately as I looked over at the new dad. He was sleeping so peacefully that I hated to wake him just yet. I had the day off, not due to go back in until tomorrow night and if he trusted me enough to fall asleep on me, then he wouldn’t care if I hung around for a little while. Someone had to look after Amelia.

  A few hours later, I folded the last towel and placed it in the laundry basket, carrying it out of the small laundry room to the master bedroom I had found on my cleaning spree. It was enormous, with a large king sized bed that put my bed to much shame, in the midst of the room. From his windows, he had an expansive view of the river below, the people looking like little ants this high up. I had told myself I hadn’t been snooping as I cleaned his bathroom for him, finding a bathroom that any woman would die to have. The sunken tub was enough to make me want to strip off my clothes and dive in.

  But perhaps the most impressive place was the spare bedroom, where all of Benji’s trophies and belts were displayed.
I had nearly spent an hour in that room, looking at all of his accomplishments and pictures from his fights. While they were very impressive, I couldn’t help but analyze the look on his face in the pictures that were scattered about the room. He looked happy in every one of them, some with other smiling faces that warmed my heart. He had found another life here, one that didn’t bring him sadness and people who obviously cared for him. His leaving hadn’t been a bust. He had done it.

  I walked out of the master bedroom but not before I checked in on Amelia, whose playpen was now beside that massive bed. I had moved her in here so she wouldn’t wake him up and now she was taking herself a nap, her belly full of peas and the rest of the carrots that had decorated Benji earlier. She was a happy baby and for that Benji was a lucky guy.

  Heading down the hall, I stopped as I saw him standing near the couch, running a hand through his hair roughly. “I’m sorry.”

  I smiled. “You needed your sleep. I handled it.”

  He looked around the living room, a smile crossing his face. “Apparently. Did you clean my entire apartment?”

  “Are you worried I will sniff out your secrets?”

  “No, I’m embarrassed as hell that you saw it like that.”

  I gave him a little shrug. “Nothing I haven’t seen before. Besides, you looked like you could use some breaks.”

  He blew out a breath. “You have no idea. I never knew being a parent could be so draining.”

  I laughed softly as I crossed the living room, feeling comfortable in his presence. This was Benji Lomns, not some stranger, the little boy somewhere still inside that magnificent body. “I made you out a list you might want to consider.”

  He walked over to the island, picking up the paper I had laid there an hour before. “A nanny.”