Love and Werewolves

by Cate Farren

  “Listen closely.”

  Valko kneeled down on the ground, and waited for his grandfather to impart some legendary piece of wisdom. He held his breath, knowing he was about to hear something that would change his life forever.

  “I have no idea,” Valko Senior admitted.

  Valko sighed with annoyance. “Are you telling me the ancestors sent you here to guide me to this thing and you don’t know why?”

  “I didn’t ask. I just wanted to see you again.”

  He laughed, and his grandfather joined in. It really had been good to see him again, even if it was only a temporary visit.

  “But do you have any clues as to why?” he asked.

  Valko Senior shook his head. “Something like this rarely happens. I can only surmise that finding this artefact is of massive importance to not just you, but the supernatural community itself.”

  Valko looked at the disc in his hands, now dark and silent, just a scrap of fancy metal. “How can the fate of the world hang on this?”

  But Valko Senior was gone.

  Hope to see you next full moon, Grandfather.

  ***

  Valko closed the door behind him quietly, careful not to wake anyone up. Adrian was fast asleep, oblivious. Alanna was no longer on his bed. He could see a faint light coming from under her bedroom door.

  I have to talk to her.

  He slipped the artefact under his mattress and took a deep breath. He couldn’t tell her he had it, not yet, not until they’d finally sorted things out between them.

  He knocked quietly on the door.

  “Come in, Valko,” she said.

  He opened the door. It creaked a little.

  “What do you want?” she asked.

  She sat on the edge of her bed, dressed in a somewhat Victorian looking nightgown made from thick materials and frills. It looked warm.

  “I need to say something to you,” he said.

  “Close the door,” she said. “I don’t want them hearing this.”

  He closed the door, feeling sick and nervous. He was ready to leave now. He couldn’t allow his parents to suffer a moment longer than was necessary. Yet how could he go without finally having a conversation with Alanna? How could he not tell her how he felt?

  “What were you doing in the mine?” she asked casually.

  He hesitated. “It was the perfect place to be alone.”

  She stared into his eyes. “You can change into a wolf again.”

  “I haven’t done it yet, but I know I can. I can feel it.”

  She smiled and said, “I’m happy for you.”

  He hated that his happiness was causing her misery, but he had to do this.

  “Alanna…”

  She stood up to face him, or as much as she could due to the huge difference in their heights. He loved how she could confront him despite the fact she knew what was coming and that it would break her.

  “You look beautiful,” he said.

  He stroked her face, closing in for a kiss. When his lips were just a breath away from brushing her own, she stepped back to deny them what they really wanted.

  “I can’t do this,” she said defiantly.

  I’m not going to accept that. Not now.

  Chapter 13

  “Why?” he demanded. “Why can’t you do this?”

  “You’re leaving!” she shouted.

  “Alanna…”

  “Are you really going to tell me that you’re not going to leave?”

  There was dirt on his shirt and in-between his fingernails. What had gotten him so dusty down in the minds? Had he been digging?

  “I can’t,” he admitted. “That’s the reason why I’ve been scared to start something with you. I can’t leave you heartbroken. I want you so badly it hurts but… but I have to go. And yet I want you. I…”

  “I know.”

  His brow was sweaty, like he’d been working hard at something. She wanted to ask him what he’d been up to, but didn’t want to spoil the moment. He looked hurt and emotional, and she felt the same, yet she knew something was going to happen between them, no matter their feelings.

  The way he looks at me is more than sadness. He’s lustful. The full moon is making him more savage, animal-like ; more carnal.

  “But that’s not the whole reason for you, is it?” he asked.

  He had to bring up Valko Senior, didn’t he?

  He continued. “I don’t need to be an idiot to know that you had feelings for him. You loved him. Not as a friend, but as something else.”

  “Yes,” she confirmed. The heartbreak she’d felt all those years ago was fresh and current in her mind. “I was in love with him. We both knew nothing could come of it because he was a homosexual. But I still loved him with my whole heart, and when he left, I thought that was it for me. I knew I was going to be lonely forever. I know Valko loved me in his own way, but…but not the way I wanted. It still hurts so much.”

  “Did you use your cadou on him?”

  “I did, yes. I think he regretted it afterwards to be honest. He didn’t want to spend his entire life denying who he was.” Alanna hesitated. She’d wanted to know the answer to her next question ever since she realized who Valko was. But did she want to know the answer? What would knowing the truth achieve but to make her more melancholic? “Did Valko… did he die happy?”

  I wanted him to die happy, but I have this horrible feeling he spent his life unfulfilled. I don’t think I can bear to know that.

  Valko considered for a moment. “I think he was happy in his own way. He loved my great-great-grandmother, and they had many wonderful years together. They only had one child, but they doted on him.” He paused again before saying, “He died from lung cancer.”

  Alanna nodded, and pushed aside the tears. She’d wept for Valko a long time ago.

  “A painful way to go,” she said sorrowfully.

  “Even his werewolf healing couldn’t heal him in the end,” Valko explained. “And yes, he was in pain, but he was surrounded by the people he loved. He died as happy as he could be, despite the terrible circumstances.”

  She nodded. “I’m glad. I just wish he could’ve found true love, even if it wasn’t with me.”

  Alanna despised today’s homophobic and racist culture. Humans were their own worst enemies. The supernatural races may have warred on occasion, but they didn’t discriminate against people because of who they loved.

  No. The supernatural races just had wars over silly things like revenge and who had the most magical power.

  “Maybe he did,” Adrian whispered, a smirk on his face.

  “What do you mean?” Alanna asked.

  “After Grandma died, Grandfather had this friend. Looking back on it now I can see they were more than friends. I only saw Grandpa having a best friend and saw nothing else to it.” Adrian laughed, as if discovering a wonderful secret. “The sly old dog! No wonder the family were upset with him for a while. Not because of the whole gay thing, but because they thought he was disrespecting Grandma’s memory.”

  Alanna smiled. She was glad Valko Senior had been happy during his final days. That’s what a person wanted when they finally shuffled off this mortal coil, to go knowing that they were happy and loved.

  Who is going to mourn me? The cow?

  If things were different, she could have this wonderful man standing in front of her.

  If only…

  “I know I look like him,” said Valko. “My dad says I’m the spitting image.”

  Alanna couldn’t help but smirk. “You certainly are. You even smell like him. It’s uncanny.”

  “It must have made you uncomfortable.”

  “It made me feel uncomfortable, but happy too… and nervous and excited.”

  You made me excited and sexually aroused for the first time in a century. You made me feel like a woman.

  She tried not to laugh. It was ridiculous.

  “It doesn’t have to end like this,” he pleaded with her. He held
his hand out, tried to grasp her small fingers. “You can come with me.”

  “I can’t leave,” she insisted. “You know that.”

  “I don’t know anything because you won’t tell me why you’re really here in this cabin!” he shouted, his anger ferocious, consuming. “Tell me the truth!”

  “I don’t want to get our hopes up!”

  “Why would whatever you’re looking for in the mine get my hopes up? For fuck’s sake, tell me the truth or I swear I’ll leave you here to rot and I won’t ever look back.”

  She knew he was lying. He would leave, but he would think of her. They’d been forever entwined the moment he fell into her barn.

  Why am I keeping the truth from him now? What’s the point? Do I like making myself miserable? He’ll still go, but he’d know everything there is to know about me. Everything.

  She sat on the edge of the bed. He watched her, his eyes dark. “A long time ago, there was a vampire called Desdemona. She came to settle here during the first few decades of colonization of the new world… and somehow she stopped being a vampire and became human.”

  “That’s not possible.”

  Alanna couldn’t remember how many times she’d said that to herself. How was it possible? How could Desdemona achieve something that no magic had ever been able to do? Yet she knew it was real because she had faith in it. She had hope. Now she had proof in the journal that Adrian had brought, proof that everything Desdemona had done was real.

  “It is possible, because she did it.” Alanna could almost feel the power beneath her feet, like it was close. “She did it with the aid of an ancient, powerful artefact created by a god. It turned her human.”

  He seemed dubious all of a sudden. “Are you sure this isn’t some vampire fairy tale?”

  “I’m sure. She used a witch to transport the artefact underground so nobody could ever use it again. I’ve been digging for it for nearly 150 years.” She groaned tiredly. “I even dream of those choking, claustrophobic, labyrinthine corridors”

  If I never see another pick or axe ever again it’ll be too soon.

  “Why would she get rid of it?” Valko asked.

  “She knew it could be used as a weapon against the vampires,” said Alanna. This had only been a guess until she’d read the journal. Now she knew for sure what the older vampire’s reasons for getting rid of the artefact were. “Desdemona was ancient and she’d seen a lot. All it would take is one stupid war about which Fey king has the better hat, and the artefact would be used on vampires against their will.”

  He nodded, understanding. He’d most likely been taught the history of the supernatural races at school just like she’d been. Human beings thought their conflicts had been bloody. The shapeshifter war of long ago made World War 2 look like a playground scuffle.

  “I don’t get it,” Valko confessed.

  She looked up at him. “You don’t have to get it.”

  “Why would you want to become human when you’re immortal?” he asked, genuinely baffled. “Most humans want to live forever. Why would you not want that?”

  Alanna felt like striking him, despite the fact he was clearly oblivious. Did he not know?

  He was mortal. How could he know?

  “I’m lonely,” she said imploringly. “I’m bored. I’m sick of drinking blood. I want to be able to eat proper food again. I want to get married and have children and have a normal life. Being a vampire, being immortal, isn’t wonderful, it’s a curse. It’s a curse that I’ve lived with for too long.” She wiped at her eyes, furious with herself for crying. “I want it to be over.”

  He sat on the edge of the bed. His knee touched hers. He was warm, though still filthy from whatever he’d been up to in the mine. She wanted to touch him so much, no matter that he was covered in dirt. She wanted him to make her dirty too.

  “You think things will change when you become human?” he asked sincerely. “You think you’ll be content and happy just because you can eat burgers and fries again?”

  She gave him a perfect side-eye. “I’m not naïve. I know I’ll have to work at it. But I’ll be human.”

  His fingers played with her nightgown, the nearest he could get to her physically without kissing. She felt greedy for him.

  “You’ll be vulnerable,” he stated.

  “I’ll be human!” she shouted.

  His hand reached her chin, his thick fingers light and delicate on her skin. She shivered, goosebumps prickling up and down her body.

  “Do you truly want this?” he asked.

  “I do,” she answered. “More than anything.”

  He stood up, anger seeming to overtake him.

  “Then have it,” he snapped. “Find your damn artefact. You’ll have to do it without me. Look me up when you’re human.”

  “Wait,” she begged. “Please, wait…”

  “I don’t want to keep you from your quest. I have to save my family.”

  “You’re going to go against Rian and his pack all by yourself? You’ll die.”

  “I have people I can seek out.”

  “Valko…”

  He grabbed her by the arms and pulled her to him. He kissed her on the lips hungrily, desperately. She felt her legs go weak as his hands continued to grip her arms. He kneaded her skin, which made her tingle.

  He pulled away, the grin on his gruff, bearded face the most magnificent thing she’d ever seen.

  She stroked his beard. “Before you go…”

  “I don’t want to break your heart,” he protested.

  “It’s far too late for that, for either of us.”

  He kissed her again, capturing her lips with hungry urgency. He smelled of lemon soap and spice, sharp and exotic. His skin was soft, but the roped muscles flexed against her. It was a delicious mix of gentleness and raw animal power that went straight to her heart. Suddenly overpowered by her emotions, she could barely catch her breath.

  “You’re beautiful,” he whispered. “You’re so beautiful.”

  His green eyes were smiling down at her. They wanted her. They wanted to see her naked, the candlelight highlighting every pore on her skin. He needed her and that need made her feel like every lost love and every heartbreak was worth it just to get to this moment.

  “I want you so much,” he whispered. “I need you so much.”

  She reached up and rubbed herself against him. “I want you, too.”

  “I want to see you naked.”

  He slowly stripped off her nightgown, and exposed a lean, light body, trim yet with a sweep of lush hips and small, firm breasts. Her skin was pale as milk, like that of someone who despised and avoided as much sunlight as possible. Dipping his head, he brushed the smooth swell of her breasts with his lips.

  Alanna heard herself growl as anticipation tightened her body. His lips were soft, teasing her delicate, throbbing nipples.

  “You’re so beautiful,” he chanted.

  The words went straight to her clit, which ignited an urgent, pounding need that flowed through her. Aware of the quick harsh gasps exploding from her, she reached up with shaking hands to pull his shirt over his head, which exposed a broad, deep chest and sculpted abs. His perfect body would forever be marked by scars, but that only highlighted how wonderful that he truly was.

  Leaning into him, she licked a rippling muscle, and giggled as she heard him gasp and saw goose pimples rush over his chest.

  “You’re beautiful too,” she chuckled as she tickled the huge scar around his abdomen.

  His intestines were hanging out. I had to sew him back up.

  The fact that she’d patched up his body made it even more erotic for her.

  They ripped off each other’s clothes, laughing and gasping with mingled anticipation and need. As he stripped her of her underwear, Alanna became intensely aware of the joy that flooded through her. The strong arms were tender, the need in him tempered by loving care. This was a perfect moment that she would treasure forever, long after he was gone and she
went back to the mines and felt like the most worthless vampire that ever existed.

  For now, I want to be a vampire, to be able to feel more, to be able to sense more. Humans are quite unlucky in that regard.

  She almost fell for her own lies. She couldn’t become human, not any more. She’d read the hard, brutal truth in the journal. The artefact and how it worked was a lot more complicated than she’d imagined. Still, for now she was a vampire, and she would embrace it.

  But what would I become? Vampire, or…?

  Naked now, they explored each other. His hands were warm, and ran over her body as he drank in the small breasts, tight waist, and swelling bottom and thighs. She kept fit and trim. There wasn’t an ounce of fat on her body.

  “Perfect,” he sighed.

  In return she ran her hands over his tanned skin, enjoying as the ropey muscles flexed and bulged in response to her touch. He had long lean hairy legs, strong thighs like tree trunks, and a totally ripped abdomen. Even having his stomach ripped open hadn’t marred his perfection.

  On impulse, she leaned in and kissed the massive, puckered scar on his stomach. The scent of him swelled, and she could hear him growl with need. She placed her tongue along the grooves of the scar, gently, tasting him, showing him his battle wounds were nothing to be ashamed of.

  “Your scars make you,” she said, and hoped he wasn’t feeling self conscious. “They paint you as a survivor.”

  “I’m hard to kill,” he admitted almost shyly.

  He dipped his head, his tongue tracing a line along the delicate neck, all the way to her collarbone.

  “Dear lord take me now,” she gasped.

  In response, he tipped her on to the bed. Lying in each other’s arms, licking, kissing, nuzzling and nipping, they reveled in their burgeoning passion.

  She could feel his cock hard and hot against her, his excited gasps exploding from him, as he moaned, “Ohmigod, I want you so badly!”

  His words sent a surge of heat rushing through her. Her heart was beating so quickly, that she could feel the drumming in her ears. Her legs were curling around his waist, the slick dampness of her against his erection.

  He suddenly stopped.

  “What is it?” she asked.