"I'd like more time," she admitted. In fact, she yearned for it. "There's never time for fun," she admitted as she tugged the sheet higher. "I work late, fall into bed, then get up at dawn to do it again. Tori and I joke about her man-of-the-month boyfriends, but her short-lived relationships are more than I've been having."
"You're in charge," Matt reminded. "Why not adjust your goals?"
He was right, of course. She had choices. She'd just never felt she had the right to change them. "I guess I still have something to prove— that I wasn't a mistake." She chuckled. "That's a pretty stupid reason, now that I think of it."
"Definitely not stupid." He leaned in for a lingering kiss.
The expression in Matt's eyes made her heart dance. No one had ever looked at her like that— as though she were a woman— instead of a balance sheet. A tiny ash smoldered in her chest, flickering with the hope that maybe— this crazy, happy joy with him could last.
"Actually— one good thing resulted from your phone call."
Julie eyed him suspiciously. "What was that?"
"Everyone agreed you suck at lying."
Despite her annoyance, her lips curved. "That admission must be killing you."
"Haven't you ever had to lie your way out of a situation?"
She thought for a minute. "The occasional white lie— to not hurt someone's feelings."
"Your mom never caught you doing something bad?"
Her smile faded. "She died before I was old enough to be doing stuff I shouldn't."
Regret flared in his eyes. "Jules— I'm sorry. I forgot."
She ignored the sudden wave of sadness. Matt had no way of knowing the pain his comment stirred. But now wasn't the time for regrets. "I'm pretty sure I would've lied at some point, especially with a friend like Tori."
"I—we got the sense she's pretty fun."
"She's definitely a free spirit. I love that about her."
"You're not?" Matt sifted her hair through his fingers.
She loved the shivery trail his hands left. "I have a company to run."
"Do you ever wish that was different?"
"What I want. . . sort of doesn't matter."
His eyes were puzzled. "Why would you say that?"
"Sometimes . . . we don't get what we want."
***
Matt stretched, his body already familiar with Jules. Her lips brushing his shoulder. Her heartbeat a slow, gentle rhythm against his chest as she slept. The familiar scent of her satiny skin made his stomach fist with pleasure, though he still dozed fitfully. When his brain surrendered to an overwhelming fatigue, he dreamed of her, a vivid fantasy come to life. At the very moment he gazed into her passion-filled eyes, Julie morphed into Pam.
And there was blood. So much blood. The sound of the shot reverberated in his ears. . . as the bullet tore through her instead of him. Matt flinched at the impact of her body collapsing against him, his hands crimson as he fought to stem the flow. Her eyes. . . pleading with him, still hopeful he would save her as she drew her final breath.
Bolting up in confusion, he shivering violently, finally remembering where he was. His heart still thundering, he managed several deep breaths, forcibly shaking off the solitary nightmare. Drenched in the terror of the vision, he remembered the helplessness— the futility of trying to save her. The desperation as he lay in the sand, her lifeless body clutched in his arms. He'd been too late for Pam. Too late to stop the chain of events leading to her death.
The confusion fell away, stripping Matt to the essence of what troubled him. Would he be too late for Julie? Earlier, something inside him had snapped free. Something primitive and dangerous. He'd gazed into endlessly green eyes, his body joined with hers. The thought of his baby . . . growing inside her. A fierce knowledge had swept him. He wanted her. Forever.
The acknowledgment left Matt with the jagged clarity of a single emotion. Gut-wrenching fear. He couldn't have her without Jules knowing the truth— that he could fail her. How much faith would she have when she learned of the fatal error that cost Pam her life? How would he summon the courage to admit his biggest mistake?
Chapter 13
Julie awoke at dawn with an overwhelming sense of foreboding. Matt's spot in the bed already cool. Only hours earlier, she'd experienced wonder and amazement with the man she'd fallen terrifyingly in love with. For a fleeting moment, she'd experienced joy. Hope over the fragile new relationship. Now, she dreaded her return to KTec. Dreaded the mess she faced. For the first time, the idea of walking away— from the problems, the stress, from the long, unappreciated hours— felt enlightening. To contemplate the possibility of a different life left her nearly lightheaded.
A few minutes later, she was toweling her hair dry when he knocked. "Okay if I come in?"
"Your mother?" Julie glanced to the door. It was probably silly to worry now— the time for that should've been last night. But now that she was capable of thinking clearly, she was embarrassed.
His satisfied smile made her flush. "Too late now, Jules."
By the time Matt finished kissing her, she was clutching his arm for support. "What was I saying?"
"My mother," he coached, a teasing smile on his lips.
Her confusion cleared. "Right— I don't want her to think less of me-"
"She'd probably be thrilled." At her panicked expression, Matt relented. "Relax. The house is enormous."
Relief trickled through her. "Until this is over, we probably shouldn't— you know."
"Like hell," he protested. "My vote is we'll be 'you knowing' all the time." Checking his watch, he sighed. "Except now. We've got to wire you up. I want to test your mic and battery pack."
"Okay." Ridiculously pleased by his admission, Julie accepted the change in subject with a smile.
"Unbutton your blouse," he instructed.
Startling at the command, she read his awkward smile.
"That didn't come out quite right." Matt opened his hand, revealing the tiny wire she would wear. "I have to clip this to your bra. Then you can button up and I'll check if it's visible."
She heard his ragged breath when she revealed the lacy camisole hidden under the no- nonsense suit he'd brought from her apartment. "Is this far enough?"
His eyes heated. "Are you trying to kill me?"
Her pulse tripled when she read his expression. Maybe the day wouldn't be so bad after all. "It makes my suits less boring, don't you think?"
"God— now all I'll think about is taking you on your desk." Matt dropped a quick kiss at the top of her cleavage and her insides liquefied. His mouth against her skin, he whispered. "You sitting on the edge . . . we hoist this skirt up . . ." When she shuddered, he rewarded her with a smug grin.
By mutual agreement, they spent the next several minutes torturing each other with mouths and tongues and hands. When they finally drew apart, Julie discovered she'd somehow lost her jacket. Her breasts were free of the unbuttoned camisole and her hair looked as though she'd ridden on the back of a motorcycle.
"Are you absolutely sure you need to get in early?" Matt's voice hinted at a barely contained control.
She shuddered in a breath of much needed air. "N-no— yes." Judging by her voicemail, she would face a few board members today— out for blood. The day could likely be the toughest of her career. Sadly, she had not an ounce of strength remaining— not even for another mind-blowing sexual detour.
At his hopeful expression, she hardened her resolve. "I should— get there soon."
"Hell." Despite his disappointment, Matt quickly got to the business of wiring her. When he finished a few minutes later, she had a microphone on her bra, a battery pack at the small of her back and a recorder on her hip. And the memory of his warm hands everywhere.
Slipping on her jacket, she watched him in the mirror. "I don't have to do anything?"
"Don't jostle around, speak normally and try to forget it's there. Anything said within fifteen feet will be picked up by our receiver. You'll wear this earp
iece so we can communicate."
She frowned. "Is it on now?"
Matt shook his head. "I'll activate you once you've arrived at work. It's got GPS, so we'll know where you are at all times." She moved past him to the mirror. "Jules-"
Meeting his gaze, she was shocked by the concern suddenly etching his features.
"I don't want you taking any chances." His voice tightened. "Three people are dead."
Like an unwanted guest, reality intruded once again. She reached up to kiss him. "Don't worry."
"We need to worry. You need to be cautious." He pulled her roughly into his arms. "If anything happens to you-"
"You won't let it," she reminded. When anguish flashed briefly in his eyes, her curiosity flared. How could her vote of confidence possibly make it worse?
He dragged a hand through his hair. "There's something I need to tell you-"
She reached up to smooth down his mussed hair. Julie prayed the investigation would resolve soon. She wanted to get on with their lives— explore this crazy new love at her leisure—without worrying about getting shot.
When Matt's phone chirped, he appeared reluctant to answer, instinctively knowing once he acknowledged the intrusion, the fragile spell woven between them would be broken. Kissing her again, he reluctantly released her. "Finn's on his way up. Remember— don't go anywhere alone. Even inside the building— try to stay in groups."
"Someone will hear every conversation I have?"
His hand at her back, he walked her to the front door. "Not someone. Me."
"I'm still not crazy about this."
He nodded to Finn as he entered. "It's the only way we can let you go in. I'll be listening. If you get in trouble, we can take action immediately."
"What sort of trouble?"
A guarded expression crossed his features before the shutters lowered. She picked up on a volley of unspoken communication between the partners before Finn finally answered. "We've ID'ed the dealer from last night."
"And?"
Ignoring her, he angled his head toward Matt. "Nothing for you to worry about."
She tried to hide her annoyance at being shut out. Again. The hurt was more difficult to mask. For all they'd experienced the previous night— nothing had really changed. Matt's gaze finally met hers as she brushed past. She sensed a door slamming shut. Spell broken.
***
By nine, Julie's morning had become a certifiable disaster. Standing in her office, she wanted desperately to mutter. Muttering helped her work through problems. Resolve issues. But he'd stolen that from her, too. Taking a deep breath, she was painfully aware of the wire taped to her chest. Somewhere, someone with a headset was hunched over a console, listening to every word being said. Not someone— him.
There'd been the disillusionment of realizing nothing had changed between them. Except sex. The intimacy she'd anticipated hadn't materialized. He was no closer to confiding in her. But was he really to blame? When he'd made no promises.
If that wasn't enough— her plan to sneak into the building had blown up when she'd been surrounded upon arrival. Her naive hope that she would be able to gauge people's reactions had been in vain. Rachel, the receptionist had let everyone know. By the time department heads made an appearance several minutes later, the element of surprise had been lost. If any were guilty of a crime, they'd had plenty of time to absorb the shock of her continued survival. Bernie Lambeth had called in sick.
The stories of her 'disappearance' varied from outrageous to not-far-off-the-mark. She'd quit; run away; had a breakdown. That one was pretty close to accurate, Julie realized as she shut her door and leaned back against it.
Collapsing in her chair, she resisted the urge to lay her aching head on the desk. In the single day she'd been missing, she had twenty-seven calls to return. That didn't count the calls and emails still stacked up from the previous Thursday and Friday, when she'd been unconscious in a hospital bed. Griggs' widow had called five times.
Julie's relief was short-lived when Rachel buzzed ten minutes later. "A few board members have stopped by to catch up. I suggested you may not have time today but . . ."
Rachel's guarded tone told her exactly what 'catch up' meant. "Seriously? I was gone one extra day."
"Yes, ma'am." She paused a moment. "Shall I send them to the conference room?"
She released a frustrated sigh. "Go ahead." As she left her office, she tried to dismiss the feeling that she was heading to her own firing squad.
As often as Julie had been in the conference room, it never failed to soothe her. The rich, warm tones reminded her of her father and how much time he'd spent there. Her sense of peace was marred when she glanced down the table.
"Good morning." She greeted three frowning faces with a solemn expression she hoped hid her nervousness. "I'm sure by now you've heard of Mr. Griggs' death. He will be greatly missed."
"Let's dispense with the pleasantries, Miz Kimball. Where the hell have you been?"
At least she had confirmation of how the meeting would proceed. Steadying her nerves, Julie faced her accuser. "I was away on company business, Mr. Staunton, as I made clear on our conference call last week. I ran into trouble and my return was delayed by one day."
"KTec is too large for you to play games with the investors' money. It needs to be run like a business. If you want to take extended vacations, perhaps it's best that you step down."
"I am well aware of my responsibilities to KTec— and the board." Jaw clenched, she schooled her tone. "And to clarify, my trip was business."
"Whoa there, Julie," Jackass Jonas Riding interrupted, another Dandridge plant on the board. "I heard you skipped a client meeting last week." He stared at her through his absurd little reading glasses.
How had Riding scored that information? Staring at them, she realized only one remained from her father's days. The rest had been 'suggestions' from Ray Dandridge. Suggestions she hadn't fought. Naively, she'd assumed Ray was looking out for KTec— that his investors would make the board stronger. Instead, they had stymied Julie at every turn. Any suggestion— a new revenue stream; upgrades to streamline the aging warehouse; even hiring decisions were now second-guessed. Ray's choices had made Ray stronger at a time when she hadn't realized they were in competition.
"There was a miscommunication with Marketing about the meeting."
"I'd like to hear your explanation."
After years of his sniping, half-truthful accusations, Julie wanted finally— to put him in his place. But she would be the one who looked defensive and small. Her heart in overdrive, Julie stared down the table at Riding. He, the concerned board member and she, the spoiled rich kid, running daddy's company into the ground. "As I've been dealing with more urgent matters since I arrived, I haven't spoken with the marketing department yet."
"What's more urgent than new business?"
Anger heating her skin, she forced a neutral expression. "While it may suit you to portray me as reckless, I can assure you that I care deeply about my father's company."
Riding's expression was smug. "I ask again— what are you wasting time on? Maybe we need to take a greater role in the day-to-day operations."
The others nodded in agreement. They weren't here to discuss business. This was an attack. For too long, Julie had deferred— to their claimed greater knowledge, their age, their business standing. And they'd walked all over her. Instead of keeping peace— which she now knew was not only impossible, but also viewed as a sign of weakness— she would finally exercise her power. Perhaps they would appreciate that.
"Whether you believe I'm working hard enough is irrelevant, Mr. Riding. I run KTec, not you. My purpose here is to inform, not debate."
He arrogantly tilted his head toward the others. "Let's face it, Julie— some of us have serious doubts about your performance."
Her blood icing with the blatant insult, she felt ready maybe for the first time— for a fight. "I suggest you review your shareholder agreement. If you have iss
ues with my management style, you may relinquish your shares."
"If you were smarter, you'd realize that's not what I'm suggesting-"
"KTec will purchase them back." Frost in her voice, she cut him off, no longer concerned with the fallout. "That offer is available to each of you." Julie glanced down the table as mouths dropped open. "Anytime. Because I'm not going anywhere."
She sat back in her seat as the chorus of outraged murmurs began.
"What'll happen with Griggs' shares?"
Julie shifted her attention to Staunton. "KTec will pay the value of his shares to his widow. I'm sure Ray will provide details in the coming weeks." She was sickened by them— vultures, circling for the kill. Bolting to her feet, she was suddenly desperate to flee their company. "I have another meeting. Please excuse me."
***
"I got news." Mullaney scratched his stubbled chin, his eyes bleary with fatigue. Since Matt wasn't due at KTec until ten, they'd convened for a huddle in the parking garage after Julie's escort left. He was eager to settle in at the console in the nondescript van. Normally, the tedium of that type of detail would irritate him. But today wasn't normal. He wanted to be as close to Julie as possible without blowing cover. His unease had only magnified as she'd driven away with the protection detail.
"Last night's dead guy is Jack Stephens."
Tension crawled over him. "The warehouse guy."
"He's the link," Finn confirmed. "He used his position at the warehouse to run drugs."
"But was he Viper?"
Mullaney's eyes reflected doubt. "From what we know of the organization, I'd say no."
"After last night, I think we open this up to her whole board. There's got to be a connection we're missing." For the first time, Finn allowed his frustration to show. It had been a long night for everyone. With one of their own down, each task force member was on edge. Worry mixed with vengeance made for a volatile combination.
"I thought we were leaning toward Dandridge?" At this stage, they should be narrowing focus, not enlarging the scope.
Out of the Mist (Can't Help Falling Book 1) Page 22
