The Soulmate Edition

by Elizabeth Bemis

  “I’m overwhelmed by the contrition dripping from your voice.”

  I snorted. “Okay, what can I say? I’m a work in progress. Toni, I’m sorry for suggesting you infiltrate the commencement ceremony a year before you were due to graduate and take a degree that belonged to someone else. Then kissing the Dean of Students on stage.”

  I’d had no idea that she’d go through with it. As it turned out, the woman couldn’t resist a double-dog-dare.

  “And?” she asked, raising her eyebrows. “Is this a rehearsal?”

  “And what? And I’m sorry Dean Stoner got a boner when you kissed him and then he was so humiliated he formally disciplined you and you lost your scholarship and couldn’t graduate? Is that the ‘and what’?”

  She nodded “That about sums it up. My college career, three years of work, reduced to one wet kiss with a man in his fifties.” She shuddered at the memory. “But I do forgive you, you know.”

  As well she should. Her kiss-and-dash routine had become a regular event that had pushed her to YouTube stardom. The rest of it she might not forgive as easily however. But if I was going to do this, I had to go all the way. “There’s something I never told you.”

  Toni paused her coffee cup hovering in front of her face. “Okay. What would that be?”

  “Remember when you told me that you had a thing for Brian Rothstein and you asked me to tell him? And I said I did?”

  She nodded.

  I paused for longer than was necessary, delaying the moment because I knew she’d probably go ballistic. “Well. I never did.”

  Detonation in 3… 2… 1…

  “Are you kidding me? I angsted over that for months. I thought Brian was my soulmate. I pictured birthing his children, Cooper.”

  “I’ve always felt bad about that.” Which was true. I mean, I’m not saying that it was one of my biggest regrets of all time. She’d basically asked me to drop him a seventh-grade note. Do you like Toni? Check yes or no. But I did feel some level of contrition about it.

  “You told me he thought I was a best buddy, nothing more. Good for sharing a joke with, not his bed. Your exact words were, and I quote, ‘you’re in the friend zone, Ton, let it go.’ If you didn’t want to tell him you could have just told me.”

  “I’m sorry. I just felt like a douche saying something to him, so I just lied. But in my defense, if he wanted you, he would have put the moves on you whether I gave him the encouragement or not.”

  She frowned at me. “It’s a good thing I’m your first stop on this amends tour, because you suck at it.”

  “You’re right, geez. Okay, how can I make it up to you?”

  “Don’t worry about it. You’re right. If Brian and I were meant to be, he would have hit on me. It’s not like a guy told you he was into me and you discouraged him.”

  I winced, suddenly remembering another guy, in another situation. “Well… I might have done that too. I was looking out for you. That guy was a loser. Total loser.”

  “What?! Who was it?”

  “It was that kid with the big nose who carried a briefcase and always wanted to talk to you about software programming.”

  She narrowed her eyes on me. “That guy is now a billionaire, you do know that? He’s CEO of a software company. But aside from that, it was mean. How did you know I didn’t like Roger? What if you shattered poor Roger?”

  “You didn’t like Roger. Stop.” And clearly “poor Roger” hadn’t been shattered, if he went on to become a billionaire tech genius.

  “You don’t know that.” She took a sip of her coffee. “And so, what does this little amends tour involve? Is this where you make it up to me?”

  “Yes. As long as you agree to film it.”

  She laughed “That goes without saying.” She was as much of an attention junkie as I was. “What do you have in mind, Pretty Boy?”

  I leaned in and smiled. “Since I’m turning over a new leaf, I think it should be something that puts me in my place, you know? Shows I can be humble.”

  Toni was clearly skeptical. “Like what, you want to do Dirty Jobs or something? Jack Cooper the coffee barista for a day? That’s boring.”

  “You’re the one with the twisted mind. You can think of something.”

  The scheming look behind her eyes made me nervous. “Can I dress you in a bikini?”

  I shook my head. “No. Forget it. That has nothing to do with me making amends.”

  “Pants you?”

  “Seriously? That’s the best you’ve got?”

  Toni rubbed her hands together. “How about we recreate the Dean Stoner kiss, only you’re me and I’m Dean Stoner? It’s straight forward, fits with my brand, and doesn’t humiliate you.”

  “Done. I’m not sure it’s much of a mea culpa on my part, but if that’s what you want, I have no problem with it.”

  I heard Ruth sniff behind me. How I knew it was her, I couldn’t say. But I could sense her standing there just the same. I checked a glance in the plate glass window and realized she was using her phone to capture the scene. Probably for the B-Roll. I caught sight of another guy with an actual camera mounted on his shoulder who was also grabbing footage. Quickly, I looked back at Toni.

  She continued on, either unaware that she was on camera, or pretending to be natural. I assumed the latter and played “natural” right along with her. “Are you kidding? You are a hot commodity these days. You’ll up my stature, without question.” She batted her eyelashes exaggeratedly. “Kiss me, Jack Cooper, kiss me.”

  “You’re a nut. But thank you for not being pissed at me over the whole Brian and Roger thing.”

  Toni waved her hand. “No worries. And I won’t even exact revenge, because I’m nice like that.”

  The conversation devolved into small talk, mostly related to who we were or were not dating.

  I suddenly could feel a glare from behind Ruth’s glasses aimed at my shoulder blades. It was crazy how aware I was of her. Particularly since we weren’t dating and she wasn’t at all my type. And I’m sure I wasn’t at all her type. She seemed too serious to date an actor. She probably went for Wall Street types.

  “There is a woman waving to you. Do you know her or is that a fan?” Toni gestured to the left.

  I turned and waved back at Ruth. Apparently, she’d gotten all the B-roll she needed. “That’s Ruth. We need to do my apology all over again on film.”

  “That will seem so real,” Toni said, rolling her eyes. “Not.”

  “It’s Hollywood, Ton. There’s always a take two.”

  Chapter Four: Ruth

  I showed up at the movie set where Jack was doing a final day of shooting. Toni Salvatore was supposed to arrive in about an hour to film Jack’s penance—separate from his earlier apology. They’d already agreed she’d be getting him on tape with her kissing bandit routine. I found myself moving more slowly than usual as I made my way toward the sound stage. I was oddly reluctant to watch him kissing someone else, live and in-person.

  It was one thing to see him kissing some actress on-screen in a movie. I’d been on movie sets since I was a kid. I knew how fake and rehearsed and clinical it all was. How any two actors ended up dating after filming a movie together was a mystery to me. The realities of the process took out all the romance.

  But Toni’s kissing bandit scheme seemed a lot more spontaneous. She’d locked lips with a lot of famous and influential people. I knew this, because I’d spent far too long the night before binge-watching her YouTube channel.

  She was a fun and naturally impulsive girl, whereas no one who’d ever met me would refer to me as impulsive. Or fun.

  At that moment, I longed to be the sort of girl that men referred to as spontaneous. And impulsive. And fun. And unpredictable.

  Despite my best efforts to dawdle, I finally made it to Jack’s set. I found him standing next to someone dressed exactly like him. They even looked vaguely alike. The harness over the other man’s clothes identified him as Jack’s stunt double.r />
  “Hate to be the one to tell you, but you missed it,” Jack said to me as the other fellow backed away with a nod. “The kissing bandit has come and gone.”

  I shot a glance at my watch. “But she wasn’t supposed to be here for another hour.”

  He shrugged. “She thought she’d surprise me. Turns out, she got the surprise.”

  I gave him a questioning look.

  “She ended up kissing Chance.” He pointed a thumb at the stunt double heading in the opposite direction. “Her guy got it all on tape, fortunately. I’ll have them send it to you.”

  Before I could respond to that he kept going. “You ready for our trip?” We were to fly to Florida in two days to meet with Chantal Green for Jack’s apology to her.

  “Yes. You?”

  He nodded, paused, pursed his lips, opened his mouth like he was about to say something and then closed it again.

  I frowned at him. “What is it?”

  He smiled, then shrugged. I wasn’t sure why he seemed so nervous. “I’m hosting the movie’s wrap up party at my place tomorrow. Would you like to come?”

  I hesitated. Um…Was he asking me out?

  I shook my head at myself. No, Ruthie. He’s not asking you out. You are his publicist. “Sure,” I said, as breezily as I could manage. “That would be great.”

  He gave me the address and time. “Toni and Chance will both be there.”

  I raised an eyebrow at him. “Seriously? You’re playing matchmaker?”

  His grin was lopsided, and something funny seemed to be going on in the general region of my heart as he waved off my surprise. “I haven’t seen Toni that flummoxed by someone since… well, I’ve never seen it. And Chance defines the word unflappable, but he was clearly… flapped.”

  “Really,” I murmured, trying my best not to be flapped myself.

  I’d never really pictured Jack Cooper as the Yentl or Fairy Godmother sort.

  Turns out, I should have.

  “Ruth! You made it!” Jack’s smile was genuine and inviting as he greeted me at the edge of his pool. He wore plain red board shorts, and his muscular chest was on full display. Be still my heart. He made direct eye contact and grabbed my hand as if he were about to shake it, then wrapped his other hand around, sandwiching mine in his gentle grasp.

  I couldn’t look away from the intensity of his turquoise gaze. Good heavens, he had gorgeous eyes.

  “This place is a mad house,” he said. “A lot more people came than I expected.”

  “What can I do to help?”

  “You’re a guest,” he said with obvious reluctance, even as his gaze darted around to catalogue everything that needed doing.

  I squeezed his hand. “Hopefully I’m also a friend. Put me to work.”

  He lifted my hand toward his face and dropped a kiss on the back of my fingers. I felt the imprint of his lips shoot from my fingers to my toes leaving a burn pattern at all points in between.

  “You’re an angel of mercy.” To my great regret, he dropped my hand and pointed me toward his kitchen with a plea for more snacks and drinks. I went, grateful for the distraction. I’d been helping my mom and the studio host parties since I was about twelve. Helping out gave me something to do besides obsess over why Jack Cooper was maybe-possibly flirting with me. Did he flirt like this with everyone? Or was I somehow different?

  I returned holding a tray of shrimp puffs on one hand and a tray of champagne balanced carefully on the other. As I walked through the crowd, guests grabbed drinks and crudités and I, in typical Ruthie Miller fashion, kept myself in the background, finally unwinding a bit.

  I could do this job in my sleep, and must have been, as I was brought to a sudden and screeching halt by a sharp pinch on my butt. “Hey sweetheart, could you be a doll and grab me some ice?”

  My head came up quickly and the champagne glasses on my tray wobbled precariously. Though I’d never met David Drew before, I recognized the actor asking for ice. He was famous enough to get top ten (but rarely top five) billing in most of the movies he acted in. He was in his late fifties, and a lifetime of drinking showed on his face. His nose could be mistaken for a highway map of reddened blood vessels, and thick bags underscored his eyes. I looked at him for a long moment in surprise.

  Apparently stymied by my lack of jumping to satisfy his every whim, he shook a glass of something potent and noxious smelling in front of my face. I wrinkled my nose.

  Bourbon.

  Jack came up and relieved me of my tray of drinks. “Jesus, Dave. This is my date.”

  “Sorry, man. I thought she was the caterer.”

  I heard David Drew’s reply as if through a long tunnel.

  Did Jack Cooper just refer to me as his date?

  I glanced down at my clothes. Simple, black slacks, white blouse that was neither overly dressy, nor overly casual. Sensible black heels. David Drew could be forgiven for thinking I was working the party. I should have dressed more casually if I’d wanted to fit in to a pool party. Though, in my defense, Jack had only said “barbecue” not, “pool party”.

  “News bulletin. It’s not cool to pinch the ass of the caterer, either.”

  David Drew threw up both hands in surrender, never spilling a drop of his drink. “Sorry man. Didn’t realize your place was the capital building of the State of Political Correctness.”

  “I think you should leave,” Jack said.

  I stood speechless with mouth agape as David Drew slammed his glass down on Jack’s tray.

  David stumbled off and Jack turned to me. “Ruth, I’m so sorry.”

  I shrugged. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not your fault.” I placed a hand on the crook of his arm. “You didn’t have to throw him out on my account.”

  “Yeah, I kind of did. Men like David Drew and Harvey Weinstein have gotten away with this shit for so long because people are afraid of pissing them off, which gives them the power to keep harassing people.”

  I felt a wave of something I didn’t quite recognize. It was the feeling of being protected. I squeezed his arm. “You’re a better man than you realize, Jack Cooper.”

  Chapter Five: Jack

  “You’re a better man than you realize, Jack Cooper.”

  I heard Ruth’s words in her husky, raspy voice on an endless loop through the rest of the evening. Through Chance whisking Toni out of the party as she swelled from an allergic exposure to shellfish. Through a very public and very loud spat between a starlet and her manager-slash-boyfriend, which ended with the manager in the pool, and the starlet weeping on Ruth’s shoulder. Through a couple of long grins across the party, where Ruth winked at me before turning away on a blush. It was crazy how aware of her I was at any given moment. It was also crazy how anyone in their mid-twenties could still be innocent enough to blush. It was adorable.

  “You’re a better man than you realize, Jack Cooper.”

  Her words still played in my head as I walked her to her car, a surprisingly conspicuous, sporty, red Mini-Cooper convertible.

  “Thanks for all your help today,” I said, oddly reluctant to pass her into her car and return to my condo alone. I mean, I wouldn’t be alone-alone. There were still guests there. But everyone had moved inside, and the party wouldn’t be the same, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to catch a glance of Ruth at the other side of the room.

  “You’re very welcome,” she said, tucking her chin and letting her hair fall forward over her blushing face. She adjusted her dark-framed glasses. I noticed she did that when she was nervous, and I wanted to do whatever it took to make her feel comfortable.

  I hooked a finger under her chin and lifted her face. “I’m kind of sorry you have to go.”

  She smiled. “I’ll see you at the airport at 8:30 in the morning. I need to get home to pack.”

  I was strangely buoyed by the idea that I’d see her in less than twelve hours.

  “Meet you at security?” she asked.

  “It’s a date,” I said.

 
She narrowed her eyes on me, clearly wanting to say something, but not sure what.

  I didn’t want her to over think it. For that matter, I didn’t want to over think why I was so attracted to this woman. I leaned down and brushed a kiss over her cheekbone, then straightened again.

  Her eyes had gone huge behind her glasses. A positive sign, I thought.

  “See you tomorrow,” I said, as I backed away. It took her three tries to unlock and open her car door, and I turned, finally allowing myself to grin.

  Definitely, a positive sign.

  “You’re a better man than you realize, Jack Cooper.”

  It was the first thing that went through my head the following morning when I woke up. It was funny. As cliché as it sounded, Ruth really did make me want to be a better man.

  I jumped out of bed with an almost illegal surge of energy. I showered, shaved, dressed and packed in record time, called an Uber and made it to the airport with more than twenty minutes to spare.

  I found Ruth already there, waiting near security, a tidy weekender bag at her side and a Starbucks cup in her hand. She didn’t recognize me as I stopped in front of her.

  LAX was a pretty common place to catch sight of celebrities. Because of that, celebrity hunters often hung out there, just to see who they could see and snap a photo of. I’d found that an overly-large oxford shirt, ballcap, glasses and a fake goatee went a long way toward thwarting all but the most astute celebrity-watchers.

  Ruth did a double-take.

  “Wow. Good morning,” she said. “Joe, is it?”

  I winked. “Bob. Bob Roark. I’m with Iowa Corn Growers Association.” I pointed to my green and white hat which had an, “Iowa Corn” logo with an ear of corn growing between the words.

  She giggled and the sound streaked through me like lightning.

  “Nice to meet you, Bob. Shall we head to our gate?”

  She shifted a bag that doubled as both a computer carrier and a purse higher onto her shoulder, then gripped the handle of her rolling carry-on luggage.