Watcher: A raven paranormal romance (Crookshollow ravens Book 1)

by Steffanie Holmes

  Knowing Cole, probably not. “We should go back to the hall,” I said, suddenly desperate to see Cole, to feel his arms around me, his kisses on my lips. It seemed like the only thing that could cure the sadness that threatened to overwhelm me. “It’s not as if I can do anything more in the shop today.”

  “We could start cleaning up.” Alex offered. “Maybe get some of the tables repaired—”

  I shook my head. “That’s kind, but no. I can’t deal with it right now. Tomorrow maybe. I just … need some time to process it, figure out what to do next. Plus, we should go get Elinor and Bianca.”

  “You’re right. I’ll go pack some stuff for you,” Alex started upstairs.

  “No!” I cried out, rising from my chair. Somehow, I’d managed to avoid letting the others see the flat all day. If Alex went up there now, she’d see the sparseness of it, and she’d know. She’d know I was a failure. “I’ll do it. I know where everything is.”

  “Nonsense,” Ryan placed a hand on my shoulder and pushed me back down. “Stay right here. Detective Sanders said there’s a bit of damage up there, too. You don’t need any more frights right now.”

  “But—”

  “No buts.” Alex slipped through my fingers and bounded up the stairs before I could stop her.

  I sat back, miserable and helpless, a lead weight in my chest as Alex clumped around upstairs. She returned fifteen minutes later with a tote bag full of clothes and toiletries, and a cardboard box containing a howling Chairman Meow. “I think that’s everything,” she said.

  “Thank you,” I mumbled, knowing from her penetrating look that she was going to grill me about the flat later. Now that was something to look forward to.

  “Great. Let’s go.” Ryan ushered us into the car. I took one last lingering look at my bakery as we sped away, the police tape around the entrance flapping in the wind. The lead in my stomach sank deeper. I felt as though I were leaving it behind forever.

  16

  Cole

  After watching Mikael’s lifeless body being wheeled into the morgue, I dared a journey back to the Crooks Crossing churchyard. Of course, Gillespie and his servants were no longer there. The lid of the sarcophagus had been replaced, and the tomb thoroughly cleaned, as though they had never been there at all. I had no idea where Sir Thomas was hiding now, but I knew it would not be long now until he went to visit Morchard. If he found Byron, I’d be dead, and so would Belinda.

  I was returning to Raynard Hall just as Alex’s car was pulling up the drive. Odd. They shouldn’t be coming back from the bakery yet. And they had two other passengers in the backseat – the curvy Elinor who I’d seen in the bakery talking to Belinda, and another girl with bright blue hair. I flew down from the eaves and settled on the front step, tapping the ground with my beak to get them to hurry up.

  Belinda stepped out of the car, her head hung low. Her eyes were red, and her skin puffy. She’d been crying. What happened? Is she hurt?

  I flew down to the front step and landed hard as my injured leg collapsed beneath me. The pain flared through my body, the pulsing ring sending out waves of agonising fire. Ignoring the pain as best I could, I forced a shift. A few seconds later I was sitting naked on the step, in my human form. I started to get up to go to Belinda, but Ryan held up his hand to stop me.

  “Just because she doesn’t mind your naked body doesn’t mean I have to be subjected to it.” Ryan moved to the back of the car and opened the boot.

  “I have to see Belinda.” I growled, striding toward him.

  “Oh, don’t let me stop you.” Alex licked her lips.

  “Or me,” said Elinor.

  “My house, my rules.” Ryan tossed me a pair of shorts, which I obligingly pulled on. Elinor and the blue-haired girl made pouting faces at each other. As I walked around the car to Belinda, I peered into the boot. “You have a whole wardrobe in here? Are you on Project Runway?”

  Ryan laughed. “No, I just like to keep spares on hand in case I need to shift in a pinch. I even have clothes stashed around the village and all through the forest, in case I’m caught somewhere.”

  “Clever.” It didn’t surprise me – vulpines were always clever. Belinda looked up at me, forcing a smile. I took one look at her stricken face and ran to her, throwing my arms around she collapsed against me, her whole body sagging. “What happened?”

  “The bakery,” she sniffed, burying her head in my shoulder. “It’s destroyed.”

  “What?”

  “It’s true,” Alex said. Briefly she explained what they’d seen when they opened the bakery, and what the police had said. Belinda buried herself deeper into my shoulder, her whole body racked with silent sobs.

  I helped her up the steps to the door, my blood boiling with rage. Belinda looked so deflated, like a balloon that had been pierced with a pin. She was exactly the opposite from the way she looked last night. I gritted my teeth as I waited for Ryan’s butler to arrive at the door. I needed to get Belinda alone so I could assure her that whoever did this was going to have his throat ripped out.

  “That bakery was my life,” she choked between sobs. “It was the only thing that was keeping me going, and now it’s gone.”

  This is all your fault. My mind nagged at me. A wave of guilt eradicated the rage in my blood. If you hadn’t got her involved in this, then she would still have her business, and her life.

  “I’ll get the person who did this to you,” I said, picturing the smirking face of Victor Morchard crumpling as I pounded it to a pulp. The image made me feel slightly better about the guilt tugging at my heart.

  “He hates me this much,” she sobbed. “That’s the only reason he would do this.”

  “Who would do this?”

  “Ethan.”

  “I don’t think your ex did this.” I told her, rubbing her shoulders.

  “Of course he did. He wants to take everything from me. You don’t understand how he thinks, but I do. I deserve this. I’m such an awful person, that’s why he hates me. It’s all my fault.”

  What? Is she serious?

  “No, hush.” I pulled her hands from her eyes. “Look at me. You can’t talk like that. You are the exact opposite of an awful person. You are wonderful, and kind, and incredibly beautiful. And hot as fuck.”

  She scoffed. “Whatever. If I’m so kind and beautiful and wonderful, then why did he leave me? Why did he take everything from me?”

  The words stung, the fact she was still thinking about him, still caring what he thought. That thieving bastard had really done a number on Belinda’s psyche. I gripped her chin between my fingers, pulling her face up so she could see my face. She kept her eyes cast downward. The rivers of tears streaming down her cheeks turned my blood hot with anger, burning through the pain that tried to pull me back to my master. The idea that Belinda thought so little of herself hurt more than all the pain Victor Morchard could inflict.

  “You want to know why? Because he’s an arsehole, and he’s lucky I haven’t caught up with him yet, because I would stick my boot so far up his arse people will think Doc Martens have started making hats. Don’t for a second let that bastard dictate how you feel about yourself. You are an amazing person, Belinda. You rescued a bird in danger, you took in a man who needed a place to crash, you treated me with dignity and respect even though I’m no more than a slave. You battled through all your troubles with extreme resilience, you even put up with that idiotic kid out of some kind of grim obligation. But you don’t have to do it on your own anymore. I’m not going to let you. As soon as you and I are both safe, we are going to get your store back, and we are going to do something about those debts. You deserve your life back, Belinda. And I promise you I will do everything in my power to ensure you get it.”

  She looked up at me then, her eyes such intense orbs of despair, that I had to do something to bring her back from the brink of darkness. I wasn’t very good at saying the right thing, but I knew one thing I could do.

  I pressed my lip
s to hers, and prised her mouth open, thrusting my tongue inside. I poured all of my passion for her into the kiss, trying to show her how I felt about her.

  Slowly, the tension in Belinda’s body slipped away, and she kissed me back with ferocious intensity. She wrapped her arms around me, burying her fingers in my hair, a little mewling noise emitting from the back of her throat.

  Behind me, I could hear the other girls clapping and whistling. As much as I liked an audience, I didn’t think they’d want to see what I was about to do to Belinda. I picked Belinda up and carried her unsteadily through the labyrinth of halls to our rooms, my mouth never leaving hers and my hard-on slapping impatiently against my thigh the entire way. My leg twinged with every step, and the ring pulsed angrily, but I was getting good at ignoring them both, especially when she was in my arms.

  I kicked open the door to Belinda’s room, and manoeuvred her inside. I tossed her on the bed. She bounced a little on the soft mattress. I leaned over her, loving the way her hair fanned out around her delicate face, and smothered her with kisses. She wrapped her legs around my body, pulling me against her, grinding her pelvis against my engorged cock. Christ, that was hot. I tore off her shirt, revealing her beautiful body. She kicked off her own shorts, and leaned back against the covers, begging me with her eyes to follow.

  I pulled off my own clothes and slipped on a condom. It took only moments to remove Belinda’s bra and panties, and then I was looking down at that stunning woman in all her naked beauty once more.

  I could see in Belinda’s eyes that this wasn’t the time to be tender. She didn’t want the space to think about what was happening. She just wanted to be. That I could provide for her. I flipped her over onto her front and pushed her legs apart with my knee. I grabbed her thighs and pulled her back, impaling her on my cock with one powerful thrust.

  “Oh, Cole!” she cried out, tossing her head back as I ploughed into her. She gripped the bedsheets and pushed her hips back against me, grinding herself against my cock with incredible force. I loved this view, kneeling on the bed and looking down at her writhing body, her black hair tossing wildly across her silken back as she pushed back against each thrust.

  I leaned over her, steadying my body with one hand while I thrust the other beneath her. I took her nipple between my fingers and twisted it. She cried out, biting into my arm and growling between her teeth.

  “Too hard?” I whispered in her ear, concerned I had hurt her.

  “No, I want more. Harder!” Belinda cried, her shoulders tensing as she slammed her pelvis back against mine. If you insist. I twisted the other nipple. Belinda ground back against me, tossing her head back, and presenting me with her bare neck. I bit down on her shoulder as I continued to twist her nipple, and she growled again.

  “You like it hard?” I growled in her ear.

  “I love it!” she moaned back, her walls tightening around my cock as her body responded. “More!”

  I was right about Belinda. She had a hidden dirty-girl side, and now that girl had come out to play.

  Belinda bucked against me, her moans growing louder, more urgent. I reached around further and touched my fingers to her clit. “Yes, Cole, yes!” she cried, grinding against me as I stimulated her. Her orgasm came quickly, her whole body shuddering as her walls contracted around me, squeezing me inside her. The sensation was so hot I almost sent myself over the edge. I stopped thrusting for a moment, taking a few deep breaths before I continued.

  I liked this girl. I liked her a lot.

  Even though she’d just come, Belinda continued to grind herself against my cock, pushing me as deep as I could go. I sat up again and gripped her thighs, stroking her shapely ass as I watched myself thrust inside her.

  I stroked my fingers over her skin, then lightly slapped each cheek, loving the sound my hand made as it connected with her flesh. Belinda gasped with pleasure, encouraging me to explore her further. I pushed my fingers against her sex, coating them with her juices, then ran them along her crack, pulling apart her cheeks and stroking the edge of her back hole, gently, slowly. I didn’t know if she was into this.

  “Yes!” she screamed.

  I guess she is into this. Grinning, I slipped one finger inside. Belinda gasped again, and rammed herself against me so hard I nearly fell off the bed. I leaned forward slightly, pushing my other hand beneath her, finding her clit. I stoked her with one hand as I pushed my other finger deeper inside her. I couldn’t keep my thrusts as powerful, but she ground back against me, pleasuring herself as I stimulated her from all sides. In a few minutes, she was coming again, her screams loud enough to shake the windows.

  This girl. I couldn’t get enough of her.

  Dirty Belinda was not done yet. She leaned her head against the bed and shoved her hands between our legs. At first I thought she was stimulating herself, but she ran her fingers over my balls, pulling them slightly, causing a little tenderness that only fuelled my desire. I pulled my finger from her and grabbed her thighs again, guiding her in a steady rhythm. She leaned back further and used one finger to stroke the sensitive skin that stretched between my balls and arse. Every time I pulled out and thrust into her, she would stroke that skin.

  My own orgasm built quickly, the heat emanating from my core. I wasn’t going to be able to hold on much longer.

  “You should stop doing that,” I growled in her ear. “If you want this to last longer. I’m so close right now.”

  In response, she dragged her nail across that skin again.

  “Ooooooh fuck!” I cried out as I came hard, harder than I ever had before. My body spasmed against hers, my fingers digging into her thighs as I held her still so I could pump into her. Belinda cried out as a final orgasm hit her at the same time.

  I saw stars. Bright lights swam in front of my eyes. My head spun, the room disappeared. The pain in my body faded away. I lost all sense of why I was or where I was. All that existed was the pleasure that coursed through my body, an intense heat that almost burned me up, it was so powerful.

  Wow. I had never come like that before.

  As the fire in my body started to fade, and the lights in my eyes disappeared, I collapsed against the bed, utterly spent. The pain crept back, coursing through my veins and poisoning the beauty of the moment. I pulled Belinda against my body, wrapping my arms around her. I wanted to be as close to her as I could get. I kissed a line down the side of her cheek, breathing in the exquisite smell of her.

  “Thank you, Cole.” She gripped my arm with her hands, her eyes fluttering closed. “I needed that.”

  “You’re welcome,” I whispered in her ear. As I cuddled with her, running my hands over her gorgeous skin, I realised that this hadn’t been a selfless act, not really. I wanted to make her feel better, to forget her pain for a while. But more than that, I was trying to drive out my guilt with my cock. And I hadn’t succeeded. I may have satisfied her, but I hadn’t got her shop back. I hadn’t made her life any more safe. In all aspects except one, I was coming up short. I’d done nothing to show I was worthy of her.

  Belinda was a beautiful angel, and I was the worst kind of bastard.

  17

  Belinda

  By the time we emerged from the bedroom, Elinor and Bianca were already lounging comfortably in one of the drawing rooms, a bottle of wine lying empty between them. Two sleeping cats sprawled out across the rug in front of the fire. The girls clapped as we entered the room, and I turned a deep shade of red.

  “I see the Chairman has made a new friend already,” I knelt down beside the cats and stroked them both. Chairman raised his head as if to say, “I could get used to this,” then flopped back down in front of the fire.

  Alex set Elinor and Bianca up with rooms in the same wing as mine. Cole pointed out in his tactful way that they should take the rooms on the end of the hallway, as far from ours as possible. Elinor gave me an amused look and I turned even more horrifically crimson.

  Having my girlfriends in the house was gr
eat. They distracted me from the overwhelming sadness at losing my shop. Alex and Bianca took over Ryan’s designer kitchen and made a batch of rocky road slice. Despite my being the baking expert, they refused to let me help. Instead, Elinor and I opened another bottle of wine, painted each other’s nails and giggled our way through the latest Hugh Grant film on Ryan’s enormous TV. Chairman Meow – bored of the fire now – spent fifteen minutes cautiously sniffing his way around the drawing room, and then curled up inside the liquor cabinet. Cole and Ryan retreated to the study where they could talk about shifter things.

  Eventually, Simon kicked the girls out of the kitchen so he could make the dinner. We sat down to a beautiful meal of herb-crusted salmon and lemon-roasted vegetables. After dinner Elinor curled up in the study with her phone to talk to Eric – who was recording the new Ghost Symphony album at a studio in London – while everyone else poured wine and played some kind of rude card game that was all the rage. The Chairman claimed a large velvet chair in the corner, and Miss Havisham sat regally atop the back of Alex’s chair, as though it were a throne – they both spent the remainder of the evening casting judgement upon all of us, as only cats can do.

  “Do you want to go for a walk?” Cole asked hopefully as I finished my sixth glass of wine. “Things have become a little crowded in here. I’d like to talk to you alone.”

  I rubbed my eyes, suddenly overcome with weariness. I really had to get some sleep, but I couldn’t say no to Cole. At least I didn’t have to get up at three thirty the next morning—

  No. I didn’t want to think about it. If I started worrying about the bakery, I’d never get any sleep. Cole. He was a good distraction.

  “Sure,” I said.

  We wandered out through the French doors to the gardens. Ryan followed us, slumping into one of the deck chairs with a glass of Scotch in his hand. “Don’t mind me, I like to come out and enjoy the moonlight.”