Double Down
Page 23
One, two, three, four, five. I wasn’t even sure I was doing it correctly. I’d only had one class in CPR over two years ago. What if this made it worse? What else could I do? He didn’t have a pulse and he wasn’t breathing. Finally, sirens and flashing lights turned onto my street. I didn’t look up. There’s no way they could miss us spotlighted in the headlights of my still running car.
“We’ll take over now.” Hands pulled me away. I stepped back and sank down on the porch, watching. Everyone moved so slowly. They seemed to be taking their time. Was he dead? Did I kill him? I looked down at the blood, all over my hands and my clothes. This felt wrong. “Those shots were meant for me,” I whispered.
Three months earlier
“Valerie Peterson, you mean to tell me Nick proposed and you turned him down?” Charlene, her eyes so wide they were practically popping and eyebrows receding under her bangs, made it clear what she thought of my IQ. My secretary and best friend, privy to all my secrets, was having a hard time grasping why I moved out of Delgado’s penthouse, and back in with my mother, my only other choice since the fire at my house had left me temporarily homeless.
“Well, he didn’t exactly propose and I didn’t exactly turn him down. It was all sort of hypothetical.”
Hands on her hips, she glared at me. “Why didn’t you haul his hypothetical butt down to a wedding chapel before he had a chance to change his mind? You know you’re crazy about him.”
Crazy was the operative word. Whenever he came anywhere near me, I couldn’t seem to think. My insides turned into super heated molten lava, which apparently melted brain tissue. Detective Nicholas Carmen Delgado, gorgeous and rich, wanted me to believe he loved me, believe that I could actually have him all to myself, and believe that he would never want anyone else. He wouldn’t settle for anything less and I couldn’t allow myself to believe.
“Hey, I got his Porsche,” I said, dangling the keys for her to see.
She rolled her eyes, shook her head, and then flounced out. Even in four-inch heels, no one flounced like Charlene. Petite, not much over five feet, she weighed maybe 100 pounds and had spiky red hair. Pin on a couple of wings and she’d make a perfect pixie, complete with attitude.
She went back to her desk, leaving me sitting in my office and thinking about that last night in Delgado’s penthouse. He’d brought me there from the hospital to protect me until he could arrest the man who burned down my house.
During our hypothetical conversation on the balcony, Delgado stated that he wouldn’t have sex with me, because I wasn’t ready for a commitment. When I disagreed, he’d said, “What would you say if I asked you to marry me?” I’d considered it more of a challenge that an actual proposal . . . or so I’d been telling myself. After Delgado and I went to bed, each in a separate room, I tossed and turned most of the night, waking early the next morning with a headache. Still in the tank top and panties I’d almost slept in, I tiptoed to the kitchen for a glass of water to wash down two aspirin.
Delgado stood in the kitchen, bare-chested, pajama bottoms riding low on his hips. Cover of GQ handsome, dark hair and flashing green eyes, he could stop traffic fully dressed. Half naked, he was nothing short of spectacular, broad shoulders, long muscular arms, and six-pack abs. If gladiators looked like him, I could understand women going to the games. They wouldn’t even notice the blood and gore.
We stared at each other, neither of us moving. His eyes held mine, and then traveled down the length of my body and back up. My pulse spiked. His eyes smoldered with glints of green fire. Self-consciously, I tugged on the hem of my tank top, which ended slightly above my hips and couldn’t possibly stretch to cover the length of legs and hips exposed to almost my waist in the bikini panties I wore. I knew, just knew, if I took one step toward him, neither of us would be wearing anything for long. Lungs constricted, I finally managed to drag in one ragged breath, but my legs refused to move. He waited, his eyes never leaving my face. My heart raced. Sweat trickled down my back. Here was my chance. He wanted me. I could see it in his eyes. I willed my legs to move and yet something stronger than gravity held me back—fear, mind numbing fear. He’d been right the night before, when he said that for me sex was a commitment. I couldn’t give him my body without surrendering my heart. As much as I wanted him at that moment, I couldn’t trust him with my heart, couldn’t survive having it broken again.
While my brain processed this epiphany, my hormones were screaming at me. Just one step, he’ll do the rest. C’mon, girl, you can do it. Do you know how long it’s been? Don’t be an idiot. Look at him! You’re going pass that up. He was hard to resist, the hormones were doing a darn good job of drowning out any common sense. Yet, icy fingers of panic kept me rooted to the floor.
Either my hesitation gave Delgado time to get control, or he saw the indecision in my eyes, because he closed his and moved quickly around me. Going back to his bedroom, he shut the door behind him.
I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. Obviously, I couldn’t stay in the same house with him. Eventually, the hormones would win. I couldn’t afford to take that chance. I’d only survived the heartbreak of divorcing my two-timing ex, Neil, by immersing myself in work. Allowing myself to love Delgado, would create a black hole so deep I’d never find my way out.
I walked to the sink, took the two aspirin, and then leaned against the counter until my pulse stopped racing and I got my breathing back under control. If this was the right decision, why did I feel miserable?
Look for Jealousy – Coming soon
Vicky De Leo grew up in Southern California. After graduating from high school, her family moved to Nevada. Following her military husband, she’s lived all over the United States and spent two years in Taiwan and three years in England. Returning to the states, she worked in human resources for various hotel/casinos in Las Vegas, Reno, and West Virginia before deciding to write full time.
She enjoys reading and traveling. Even after all the moves, she still enjoys the thrill of exploring a new city, perhaps walking in the footsteps of an ancient civilization. She currently resides in the rural town of Overton near Lake Mead about an hour northeast of Las Vegas.
Other Books by Vicky De Leo – The Crystal’s Curse
www.vickydeleo.blogspot.com