Awaken

by Kristen Day

  “Yes,” I confirmed, and she smiled shyly again.

  “Can I be your friend?”

  “Of course you can, Bianca. You’ll always be my friend.”

  Chapter 20

  My alarm clock was in the process of burning a blue 2:13am into my retinas as I wondered for the hundredth time how I was going to coax myself into falling asleep. After Bianca left, I crawled under my covers and tried to pretend that all was right with the world and I had nothing to worry about. Unfortunately I wasn’t good at lying to others and I was especially not good at lying to myself. To ward off the blue glare of the clock, I reached over and turned on the small lamp sitting on my nightstand. Not sleeping for the next week was not an option, so I needed to think this through. Although my journey was in one week, I liked to think that the first part of the journey was all falling into place. I felt pretty good about it, all in all. It was the part where I had to aimlessly wander around the Underworld by myself that was chewing at my conscious. Several things were reinforcing that fear. The fact that neither Priscilla (nor any other Siren for that matter) had made a threatening appearance or tried to slash my throat in the middle of the night was at the forefront of my mind. Something about their absence was extremely unsettling. I knew that Priscilla hadn’t forgotten about me or my journey, and regardless of Keto’s warning, Priscilla wasn’t the type to just sit back and watch. I was afraid she still had her hand in this somehow.

  The other issue weighing on my mind was Nadia. She shows up out of the blue, crashes the séance, haunts my nightmares and steals the souls of innocents on the side. What did she have against me? What difference did it make to her if I fulfilled my destiny or not? Finn’s speculative comments sounded in my mind. She was possibly the next leader of the Nymphs. Was she power hungry? Did she not want an equal to compete with? I was definitely still missing something. I just wished I wasn’t stuck in my bedroom, allowing my thoughts to make laps inside my head. And then it dawned on me.

  Reveries. I wasn’t stuck! I had learned how to control them! Instead of being the sitting duck, waiting helplessly for Nadia to turn up again, I could go find her. I could seek her out. Adrenaline began to shoot through my already alert system as I considered what I was about to attempt. Could I do it? What if something happened? Finn wouldn’t be there to save me or wake me up. But I couldn’t always depend on him to fix my messes. I needed to practice on my own, too. And what better way to practice than to go searching for my arch nemesis? I mean, what could go wrong? Well…besides everything.

  Before I had the chance to talk myself out of it, I turned over on my back and closed my eyes. Without Finn to run his fingers through my hair, I decided to listen to my own breathing instead. I took deep and slow breaths, listening to the sound of the air rushing in and out of my lungs; all the while willing my soul to separate from my body. It took longer than it did on the island, but eventually the numbness shadowed my mind. I turned my focus inward and immediately felt the dizziness. I fought the urge to steady myself and open my eyes. Instead, I concentrated on the spinning and the freedom that I felt. I began sinking, sinking, sinking…and then I stopped.

  I peeked out, careful not to move. Inches away from my ceiling, I immediately yelped with surprise, then giggled at myself. I did it! I glanced down at the unsettling picture of my own body lying motionless in my bed and then felt a rush of excitement at what I had done. Suddenly I was on the other side of the room. And then right back to the other side. I was a ping pong ball, bouncing around my room without a single ounce of control. I had to get this figured out before I broke something. Ignoring each wall I bounced off of, I suppressed the excitement and tried to focus on the task at hand. Nadia.

  I pictured her face. Her clothes. The smoky tendrils lifting and swirling off her skin. And I began to move. Through the wall (yes through the wall - talk about strange) and out of Maren completely. The night air caught me and I felt myself riding on the breeze. I continued to picture Nadia, as well as attempting to zero in on her evil energy. Somehow it seemed that the wind itself was carrying me to where I needed to go. An image of a leaf floating down from a tree popped into my mind, and I relaxed and let it take me.

  When I opened my eyes, I immediately fell to the floor in a heap. Apparently the landings were going to need a bit more work. Movement on the other side of the room caught me by surprise and I leapt up; flattening myself against the wall. Realizing that a lamp was shining directly on me, I groaned inwardly and moved several feet to the right and out of the bulb’s illumination. I had a bad feeling that The Reaper of souls would be able to see my soul as clear as day. A woman with long blonde hair shut the window on the opposite wall, and wrapped her arms around her body as if warding off the cold. She sauntered over to a large stone fireplace in a ruffled blouse snugly tucked into a black pencil skirt, and leaned down stiffly to turn up the gas a notch; sending the bright flames dancing higher.

  As the dim light caught her face I gasped. It wasn’t Nadia. I had somehow brought myself to none other than Priscilla’s house! Too bad GPS didn’t work in reveries. My sense of direction was greatly amiss. I was about to begin concentrating on Nadia again, when a knock came at the door. Priscilla briskly made her way to the other side of the room and swung open the door. I slapped my hand over my mouth to squelch any sound that might try to seep out.

  “Nadia! So nice to see you again!” Priscilla cooed, instantly reminding me of Lexi. Nadia slid into the light of the fire dressed in a deep purple silk blouse and black skinny jeans, topped off with zebra print peep toe shoes. Her dark hair was braided down her back, and the disparaging look on her face did nothing to help slow my pulse.

  “Priscilla,” she greeted her; annoyance heavy in her tone.

  “Sit down, sit down…” Priscilla suggested cordially, but Nadia ignored the offer.

  “I’m only going to ask this once. Does she know?” Nadia stated; boiling madness stalking just below the surface of her calm façade. I immediately assumed that they were talking about me and held my breath.

  “I’m working on it, but I haven’t been able to-“

  “Answer the question,” Nadia gritted through her teeth, but then laughed. “For a second there I forgot who I was talking to. Let me try again.” Her features darkened and twisted into something terrifying. I pressed against the wall at my back as she pointed at Priscilla. “Give me a straight answer or I will end your pathetic, useless life.”

  “She doesn’t know,” Priscilla whimpered.

  “Perfect,” Nadia’s features returned to mysteriously beautiful as she stealthily glided across the room and stood before Priscilla, who cowered in her presence. Something about the scene playing out before me was off. Priscilla was much older than Nadia, but in the scheme of things Priscilla was nothing more than a pesky eyelash to the Princess of the Underworld. Power always succeeded age. As she continued, the telltale evil smoke began to waft up from her skin and slowly tether around the room, unbeknownst to Priscilla.

  “It doesn’t surprise me really. He’s always been such a gentleman,” she rolled her eyes, “I, on the other hand, look forward to crushing her simple, wretched dreams. It will weaken her further.”

  Was she talking about Finn and me? Anger heated in my veins and my fingernails pressed into skin as my fists balled up at my sides.

  “We must make sure she doesn’t find out about the Sacrifice,” Priscilla inserted carefully.

  “And what of Natasha?” Nadia implored, as she absentmindedly picked up a mermaid figurine and inspected it. Natasha? She had to be talking about us. But why? And what Sacrifice?

  “She’s been too busy with the details of his upcoming fast and fight.”

  “Let’s make sure it stays that way.” She raised a perfectly waxed eyebrow at Priscilla, inferring that she was delegating that responsibility to her. Suddenly she furrowed her brow and glanced around the room curiously. I froze in fear and tried to remember how to leave. A connection. What could I connect to
?

  “Priscilla. I do believe we may have a visitor…” Nadia’s eyes scanned the room meticulously, looking for the presence she sensed. My presence. Sheets. My body was in bed. I closed my eyes and thought about the cool, soft feel of them on my skin. The room started to spin wildly and I landed hard. My eyes flickered open in panic, but miraculously I found myself back in my body sitting up in bed breathing hard and shaking. That was way too close. And extremely disturbing. What was Finn not telling me? Nadia had said it would crush me!? Wouldn’t it dawn on Finn that maybe he should warn me? Or Natasha? If it’s that dire, why hasn’t she told me? What did Nadia know that I didn’t? If it had something to do with my journey, which was, in fact, seven days away, I deserved to know! And what sacrifice did they not want me to know about? A sacrifice I would have to make? Feelings of betrayal and mistrust crept up into my heart. But I couldn’t let myself overreact. Natasha cared about me. She wouldn’t betray me. Would she? Would Finn?

  4:00am came and went. 5:00am. 6:00am. The more time that went by, the more desperate and anxious I became. Unable to lie still any longer, I decided to get up. I opened my closet and pulled down the valise that my mother had left me. ‘Valise’ was just a fancy word for chest, but this chest was anything but ordinary. I ran my finger over the intricate designs and unhooked the latch. I pulled out the onyx stone and anklet Finn had given me on the yacht. I secured the anklet around my leg, noticing how the stone warmed in my hand, even causing my trace to shimmer and brighten. They both immediately soothed my soul. In search of more comfort, I latched my mother’s aquamarine necklace and my own triskellion necklace around my neck, and then slid her ring on my finger. All three warmed at my touch and sent waves of courage through me, pushing away my fear.

  I slumped onto my bed, allowing my legs to hang off the edge, and closed my eyes. I clutched the stone against my chest and concentrated on centering myself. I was strong. I was smart. I would make it through this just like I had everything else in my life. I just needed to take action based on fact; not assumptions. Assumptions were the seeds of poison that destroyed lives. My foster dad, Charles Whitman, always said that assuming makes an ass out of u and me. At the time I had laughed and brushed it off; but now it was all too true. I had to stay true to what I knew. I needed to listen to that other sense that was strong within me. It wouldn’t steer me wrong. I needed to talk to Finn. Tonight. I’d ask him to come over tonight. If I could make it through my Monday classes. And that was one massive if.

  I thought about my mom and whether or not she’d been through something like this. Who did she trust? Who did she not trust? Did she go through a lot of pain in her life, or was it smooth sailing? For some reason I wanted to know. I felt closer to her now, but the consequence of that was knowing just how much I truly needed her. All I had were things. Just things.

  Chapter 21

  “No.”

  “You must allow a great amount of deliberation for this decision. It is not to be taken lightly.”

  “You think the gravity of my situation has been lost to me?” a voice threw at her; exasperated, but also shaken. It was coming out of my mouth, but it wasn’t mine. The turmoil inside me was threatening to rip me apart, piece by broken piece. The pressure it caused on my heart was unbearable. Beneath that flood of turmoil, flowed a hazy river of confusion that struggled to understand what was happening. Who was this woman beside me? My body felt different; heavier. As I glanced down at my hands, I realized why. I was…pregnant? How did that happen? I mean, I knew how that happened, but I also knew I had not yet partaken in the all important, well, prerequisites to pregnancy. Theoretically that left only a couple of other options. Either I was dreaming, I was experiencing someone else’s memories, or I had woken up in some alternate universe. All of which were entirely possible. I was banking on it being the second however. Not in control of my motions or words, I knew I was only watching what was happening. I had no involvement whatsoever. I was a spectator.

  She covered my shaking hand with hers and sighed. “Thetis,” she looked into my eyes with patience, confirming my assumptions, “I do not presume to know how hard this must be for you. I would never claim to be strong enough to make a decision of this magnitude. I trust you will choose wisely. I just want to ensure that you have considered each and every consequence.” I recognized her voice from the last memory I had shared with my mother, however this was the first time I had actually seen her. She was amazing. Flowing blonde hair, highlighted by pale streaks of white, reached her lower back and cascaded over her shoulders. Her bright blue eyes contained a strong presence of wisdom; the depths of which held courage and strength that seemingly surpassed her youthful features. She appeared to be in her late twenties; carrying a grace and dignity that refused to be overlooked. She greatly resembled the portrait I had seen of Thetis on the Fortunate Isle.

  “The only consequence I must consider is that of her safety,” Thetis declared with conviction.

  “And what of the Tydes? Who will become their leader?” she asked gently.

  “I have seen it, Amphitrite. She will return…in time,” Thetis sighed and I felt my head shake, “But if I do not provide her with the refuge she needs now, she will not live long enough to grow in years and take her rightful place as leader.” I racked my brain for the name Amphitrite. I’d heard it before, but couldn’t quite place it.

  “Visions can change, dependent on the course a person may choose to take. There is a chance she will not make it back to us,” Amphitrite reminded her.

  “That is a chance I must take. For her. For all of us.”

  “But you are our leader-“ she pleaded.

  “She is my daughter!” Thetis roared, “The people we love must always come before position and obligation. Without them, the foundation we stand upon would falter and collapse! Everything we fight for; everything we believe in would perish along with it!” My body stood as Thetis did and began to pace; unable to contain the war of emotions playing out within her heart. “As a leader, I can control neither the fate of the Tyde Order nor the Nereids from which they are descended. But as a mother, I can ensure a future for my child. And that, Amphitrite, comes before all else.”

  “As your sister, I will wholly support your decision. But I must warn you. Others will not feel the same.”

  “They do not yet know of my unborn child, and therefore they will not be privy to word of the childbirth. You must promise to keep this in strictest confidence. It is vital.”

  “I will not let you down sister, I promise,” she smiled.

  “Thank you,” My hand squeezed hers. “Never question the strength of our bond. It will endure. As will the bond between a mother and her daughter. Even in death.” I patted my stomach as a crushing sadness settled on my already breaking heart.

  Dawn. The sun crept its way across the floor of my bedroom when I came to. I laid there motionless for a good twenty minutes before attempting any activity. Between the reverie, the shared memory, and a serious lack of sleep; I was suffering from information and emotional overload. I was afraid that any sudden movements would result in a catastrophic breakdown; one that I may or may not recover from in the next century. I contemplated whether or not ‘irrevocable neurosis’ would be an approved excuse to miss classes.

  “Stasia?”

  Crap. “Yeah?” I answered casually, as if I had no idea why Willow was at my door ten minutes before first period was supposed to start.

  “You coming to class?” She poked her head in the door and raised an eyebrow at my position on the bed. I mean, who didn’t sleep sideways with no pillow and their legs hanging off the side? It was actually pretty comfortable once I started to think about it. Maybe a soft blanket would be-

  “Stasia,” she prompted again. I slowly sat up, feeling numb and detached. I nodded my head for no particular reason.

  “Be there in a sec,” I promised, without making any movement toward my closet.

  “Um..okay,” she hesitated and disap
peared back into the living room. I peered down at my wrinkled t-shirt and cotton shorts. These would not do. I spotted a less wrinkled pair of jean shorts and a mostly folded yellow tee sitting on top of my dresser. Without fixing my hair or so much as peeking in the mirror, I threw on some flip flops and headed for the door.

  “Books?” Willow stared at me bleakly. I turned around with the liveliness of a zombie and stalked back to my room in order to collect my books. The rest of the day went much the same way. My feet took my body where it was supposed to go, as my mind dragged behind; kicking and screaming the entire time. However, the closer I got to last period…and to seeing Finn; my expertly suppressed emotions started to fight their way outward. My walls were not as thick around him, and although I could pretend to be strong sometimes, I didn’t know if I was capable of hiding what lurked behind my walls today. This was foreign territory to me. I wasn’t used to having someone who could break down my walls. Or having someone who wanted to break down my walls. In all actuality, I wanted to run to him; allow him to hold me, support me, and give me a shoulder to cry on. Unfortunately, suffering a mental breakdown in front of the entire class was not an option. So the massive amount of conflicting emotions that were swirling around in my mind and wreaking havoc on my thoughts would have to wait. One hour. I told myself I could do it. I had to.

  As I walked into the classroom and met his warm gaze, I swear I heard my carefully constructed walls cracking from the pressure. I wanted to tell him about my disturbing reverie. I wanted to tell him about my amazing antiquity experience. I wanted to tell him that I suspected Nadia could enter my reveries. I wanted to tell him I’d made friends with a dead girl. I wanted to tell him I was terrified of my upcoming journey. I wanted to tell him I was terrified of his upcoming fight. And I needed to find out what, if anything, he was hiding from me. My next step coincided with the disheartening realization that my walls were not going to hold. As the first piece crumbled, followed by another and another, Finn’s eyes darkened with concern and his entire body tensed. I stopped mid-step, turned on my heel, and ran.