A Cowboy's Pride

by Karen Rock

“Not yet.” She kissed him back harder, holding on to him as if she still teetered on the ledge and he was her only lifeline.

  “Make me stop, Katie-Lynn. Please...” he begged, knowing he’d never let her go if she didn’t stop this. She had him too far gone emotionally to turn back.

  “No,” she said simply, wrapping her arms around him, kissing him just as hungrily as he was kissing her.

  Being near Katie-Lynn was like being in the center of a tornado. All his senses tumbling, spiraling, flying out of control, while at the core, at his center, was the relentless pull to draw even closer.

  Magnetism.

  He couldn’t separate himself from her. Maybe he never could. She was a brand on his skin. “Push me away.”

  “Never,” she whispered, pulling him even closer.

  “Don’t say things you don’t mean,” he said gruffly, his lips trailing along her neck. The natural, earthy smell of her soap, fresh laundry, horses, sweat, made his lungs expand, the more to draw her in.

  “Working together,” she murmured, tilting her head back, letting him kiss the hummingbird pulse at the base of her throat. “Seeing you every day... I don’t want to stop being together.”

  “Then we’re not stopping.” He moved his lips back up to hers and stared down at her. Her eyes lit up, and she gave him the full force of her smile. Oh, but she was pretty. Pretty as a pie supper. “Once we start this, we can’t go back, Katie-Lynn.”

  She gulped, a hint of nervousness finally showing, and when she nodded, he was a falling-down barn one good blow from collapsing. For so long he’d convinced himself he only wanted the ranch, but his time with Katie-Lynn showed him there was more to life.

  “This is what I want.” Her hands skimmed up his chest, over his shoulders and clasped behind his neck as she stared up at him.

  Instantly he was hung in the past, remembering the first time they’d kissed, the night of his mother’s funeral. She’d held him as he’d cried, and he’d felt as though she was the only thing holding him together. He cared about her now just as much as he’d cared then.

  Even more.

  He could scarcely believe she was here with him, that he was getting a second chance with her. A second chance at love.

  Whoa, slow down. No one said anything about love.

  Twelve years ago, she’d made it clear she didn’t want to be tied down to Carbondale, or him. Why would things be different now? He sucked in a long, deep breath. “You want me? Us?”

  “I’m falling for you again, Cole. I can’t deny it, but...”

  His heart squeezed with an ache only she could soothe. “But...” He nibbled his way along her jaw, molding her body to his. Their quick breaths synchronized when he reached the soft lobe of her ear and drew it into his mouth. “Say anything, darlin’.”

  “But I can’t make any promises,” she gasped. “There are a lot of people depending on me for the show...and...I’m not sure I’m ready to give it up to move home.”

  Her words hit him like the first slap of a blizzard. Cold and stinging. He stared at her mute, then twisted away. Talk about mixed messages. Was she as confused as he or just jerking his chain? When she caught him by the hand, he stopped.

  “Cole,” she pleaded. “Please, understand...”

  “No. You understand,” he said without turning, regret bitter on his tongue. “I’m not some leading man in a Hollywood script. These aren’t just words. This isn’t pretend. It’s real. For me, anyway.”

  And with that, he stomped off and corralled the horses, vowing to keep his distance. Emotionally, anyway. Katie-Lynn had nearly destroyed him once. This time, he suspected, she might finish the job.

  * * *

  AT HER PRODUCER’S pointed look, Katlynn returned the half-and-half containers to the diner’s bowl and dumped an extra packet of artificial sweetener into her coffee instead. She sipped the scalding fluid, the temperature barely registering. If she burned her tongue so be it. She deserved to suffer for her reckless behavior with Cole earlier. Why had she kissed him?

  Again.

  She peered out of Pete’s Kitchen’s window and watched the quarter moon crest Mount Sopris. It shed no light on her situation. Adrenaline was a convenient excuse for giving in to temptation. Gratitude for saving her life was another.

  But it went deeper and was much more complicated.

  Stars glimmered in the wide, dark sky, brilliant without smog or lights of the city to conceal them. What was she hiding behind the smile she aimed at her producer as he droned on about the episode’s early buzz and teaser previews?

  She’d fallen for Cole again. Period.

  When he’d rescued her, it’d seemed like he saved her life in other ways, too. She hadn’t even known she needed to be rescued from herself...from her empty life. But the truth stared her dead in the eye when she’d nearly fallen from that bluff.

  She was unhappy in LA. All her accomplishments seemed smaller, less consequential, when viewed from Carbondale. Something about the majestic Rockies put life into perspective. She had a lot to figure out and shouldn’t be giving a straight shooter like Cole mixed signals. His words, actions, affection were real, he’d asserted...as were hers. Yet she couldn’t act on them until she’d figured out a path forward for them.

  Was a long-distance relationship possible? He’d been against it once, but maybe time had softened him on the idea? Or should she compromise? She’d attained some fame and still she felt unfulfilled. Time to rethink her life goals, the most basic and important of which being happiness.

  Only now Cole was avoiding her.

  He’d spoken just a handful of words while they’d inspected the first of the two springs they’d targeted, noting the lack of mulberry bushes or Scotch pines, before heading home in silence. After untacking the horses, he’d disappeared to his cabin on the ranch and hadn’t emerged for supper. A long talk with her mother earlier, when she’d stopped by to visit, hadn’t clarified the situation much. Ma advised her not to play with fire unless she wanted to get burned...and to remember she wasn’t the only one she’d hurt in the process.

  Her shoulders slumped.

  “Hey. Don’t look so defeated, Katlynn.” Her producer, Tom, snapped his fingers at a passing waitress. She shot him a quick glare without stopping. “I just got a call from Celebrity magazine wanting an inside scoop on the Cade-Loveland mystery. You’re going to be a bigger star than ever.”

  She yanked her smile back on. “Great.” More attention from people who didn’t know, care about or need her...unlike Cole, or the Lovelands or even her own family, she was discovering. While chatting with her mother, Michelle had arrived while Katlynn was chatting with her mother to pick up her kids, heard Katlynn’s troubles and joined the conversation despite having just worked a twelve-hour shift. In LA, she paid big bucks for someone to listen. Here, people did it because they cared.

  Her coffee mug left a damp ring on their booth’s wooden table when she set it down. “If it’s all right with you, I’d like to call it a night. I’ve got some notes to write up and after a day in the saddle...”

  “With your ex-fiancé?” Tom’s eyes gleamed as he sniffed a forkful of lettuce before taking a delicate bite. “I still think we need to use that in the story.”

  “What? No!”

  “Celebrity magazine would like to.”

  “How do they even know about—” She broke off and stared at her smug producer as he chewed. Suspicion coiled tight in her gut. “You didn’t.”

  Tom spread his hands and a red onion slice dropped from his fork. “It might have slipped out. Gives the segment a more human angle. Anything to sell a story...free publicity for us.”

  “It’s not just about publicity. This is my life.”

  “Oh, honey.” Tom squeezed a lemon wedge over his salad. “You surrendered that long ago when you became a celebrity. Didn’t y
ou read the fine print in your contract?”

  “This isn’t funny, Tom. And Cole didn’t sign up to have his love life exposed to a bunch of strangers.”

  Tom shrugged. “You have the right to keep things off the record for the interview. I’m just advising you to—” Another passing waitress, carrying steaming platters of meat loaf and potatoes, snared his attention. He leaned out of the booth, snapping his fingers. “Server! Hey. Waitress.”

  “Why don’t you just whistle?” Katlynn slid down in the booth, embarrassed by his high-handed behavior. In LA, people catered to Tom’s powerbroker behavior. Here, it came across as entitled and obnoxious.

  Tom puckered his lips and blew an anemic wheeze of air. “I would, but I don’t know how.”

  “You can’t treat people like that.”

  “Who? Them?” He jerked his head at the hustling, red-faced waitstaff. The humid air fogged the lower half of the windows circling the crowded, rustic room. “They’re just waitresses. They don’t count.”

  Her blood fired at his dismissive words. “Who does, then? Me?”

  Tom patted her hand. “Of course. You’re our star.”

  Her gut clenched at the once cherished label. “I count because I get to dress up and talk on TV? That makes me better than Sally over there?” Katlynn gestured to a pregnant woman bussing a table with one hand pressed to the small of her back. “Who, I believe, is raising three kids alone while her husband fights a forest fire? Or what about Jenny? She—”

  At her name, Katlynn’s old classmate stopped by their table. She flicked limp brown locks off her round face and smiled. “Hey, Katie-Lynn. Heard you were in town. Wasn’t sure if you’d mind if I said hi, you being—ah—you and all.”

  “It’s good to see you.” Katlynn shot her a warm, welcoming smile and firmly ignored Tom’s rude pleas for pepper. “If you’re on break, can you sit with us? Let me buy you a cup of coffee.”

  “Oh. No. We’re not allowed to do that.” Jenny’s smile fell as she cast a quick glance back at the kitchen. A florid man wearing a Manager badge shoved open the swinging door and stalked into the restaurant. “I’ll be in trouble for talking too long since this isn’t my station, but I wanted to say I’m a big fan. You sure done us proud. And sir, I’ll pass your request on to your server.”

  With that, Jenny scurried away.

  Tom crossed his arms over his chest and shot Katlynn a smug look. “See. Even they know you’re better than them.”

  “Are you insane?” Katlynn raised her voice over the thunderous crash of dropped plates at the end of the bar. A good-natured cheer rose from the diners seated at it while the sound system blared a George Strait tune. “Did you see the yellow ribbon over her name badge?”

  Tom flicked his eyes to the ceiling and heaved an aggrieved sigh. “Ribbons were over in 2010.”

  She pulled apart her paper napkin, shredding it. “It’s not a fashion accessory here. It means she lost someone in the war. Sacrificed a loved one. What have I ever sacrificed except for unrestricted breathing because of my shapewear?”

  “Speaking of which...” Tom’s assessing gaze fell on her, and she struggled not to squirm. “When we were filming yesterday, Gabe noticed you might have put on a few pounds.”

  She gasped, her emotions veering between shame and anger. “What if I have? Does skinnier make me better?” Tufts of white paper drifted from her fingers to the table. “Does being richer make me better? Younger? Those are impossible standards. Unrealistic.”

  “It’s our business.”

  “Well, maybe I don’t want to be in your business anymore.”

  Tom chuckled slowly, knowingly. “Oooh...now I see.”

  “See what?”

  He tapped his chin. “What are you looking for? A ten percent increase in next year’s contract? Fifteen? Have Hylda call me. You know how we handle these matters.”

  “It’s not about the money,” she said through gritted teeth.

  Tom stared at her uncomprehendingly. “What, then? You want a bigger dressing room? A producer credit?”

  “I’m thinking of quitting,” she blurted, honest with herself at last.

  Tom gripped the table’s edge and leaned forward, his voice low and urgent. “Be reasonable. Lots of people are depending on you. If you quit, that’s even more ammunition for Ultima to replace us with Millennial Millionaires. Not to mention we have you contracted for twelve more months.”

  She sighed and slumped back in the booth.

  “Excuse me, miss? Ma’am?” Tom called when their server passed by a third time. “See. I was nice, and it still didn’t work. This would never happen to me in Hollywood,” he grumped.

  “You’re a big shot there. Here...you’re just another pain-in-the-butt customer on a busy night.”

  Tom speared his salad and waved his fork at her. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

  “Immensely. Now tell me what you really wanted to talk about that couldn’t wait until morning.”

  “Have you heard of Senator Reardon?”

  “Yes,” she admitted cautiously. She recalled Cole’s grandfather from his picture in papers and on TV as he’d accused the Lovelands of covering up his daughter’s murder as a suicide.

  “He heard about our episode and wants to be included.”

  Shock rolled through Katlynn, flattening her. “Not a chance in hell.” No way would she allow Cole and his family to suffer through the man’s hurtful accusations again.

  “Since you know the family, shall we say, intimately, I suppose you know what he wants to say.”

  “A pack of lies.”

  “Allegations,” Tom countered.

  “None of them proven.”

  Tom waved his American Express card at another server then lowered it when she whizzed by. “He says the ex-sheriff, Boyd’s brother, refused to investigate. Sounds like a cover-up.”

  “It wasn’t,” Katlynn denied flatly. “The Lovelands are decent people who suffered a tragedy.”

  Tom tapped the edge of his black card on the table, a speculative gleam in his eye. “Or Boyd Loveland saw an easy way to cash in on his wealthy wife’s inheritance to save his struggling ranch.”

  “Take that back,” she growled, fierce.

  “I’m just saying, there are always two sides to every story. It’s our job to present them.”

  “I’m sure there’s an alternate explanation for a secret military base operating in the desert than building new weapons...like aliens...but I’m not reporting on it. I’ll leave that to TMZ.”

  “Don’t be hyperbolic.” Tom smothered a yawn. “You’ve always been practical. Think of what this angle does for our story. The feud begins when a Loveland’s accused of murdering a Cade for her priceless jewel. Now, another Loveland, who may have killed his wife for her money, is about to marry a wealthy Cade widow... Will she meet the same fate?” Tom’s eyes glowed, a scandal-monger on the scent. “Think about it, Katlynn.”

  “I am, and the answer is no.” She glared at him. “I promised the Lovelands not to stir up controversies that’d jeopardize the peace of their upcoming wedding.”

  “It’s not like you signed anything.” He peered at her closely. “You didn’t sign anything, did you?” He pulled out his cell. “I can get a hold of legal and—”

  She held up a hand, forestalling him. “I gave my word.”

  Tom’s shoulders, covered by his expensive suit, lowered. “Good. So there’s no reason we can’t—”

  “I won’t go back on my word,” she insisted. Like Cole said, words here mattered. They were real and not spoken lightly.

  “If you won’t do it, I’ll have Ashton interview the senator for the segment.”

  “Ashton?” she gasped. Ashton Reince was a slick, smooth-talking Hollywood up-and-comer who’d take her job in a heartbeat. He filmed supplementa
ry segments for their episodes and lived to sniff out scandal, stoking it to the highest degree. “You can’t let him near the senator. He’ll have the county demanding the case be reopened when he’s through with the interview.”

  At last, their server stopped at their table and passed over a pepper shaker.

  “I asked for cracked pepper.” Tom scowled. “Not ground.”

  “Is he pulling my leg?” she appealed to Katlynn.

  “Sadly, no.”

  When the server scampered away, Tom shook the pepper over his salad with short flicks of his wrist. “We’ve already booked the senator. It’s either you or Ashton. Who’s it going to be?”

  She bit her lip, ignoring the sting. Only she could manage such a difficult interview and keep it from becoming something tawdry or worse. She had to control the message. Caught between a rock and a hard place, she blurted, “Me, but on one condition.”

  “Which is?” Tom’s cell buzzed.

  “Let me also tape a segment interviewing Boyd Loveland and Joy Cade ahead of their wedding. They were each other’s first loves, an angle that’d spice up the story without turning to innuendo and unproven accusations.”

  “They didn’t fail in some suicide pact, did they?” Tom asked without looking up from his phone, his thumbs whizzing over the digital keys.

  “No.”

  Tom finished his text, stowed his phone and sighed. “Pity. Okay. Get both interviews, and we’ll see which one works better. Deal?”

  Katlynn sagged back in the booth. “Deal.”

  She’d do the interview of her life to portray Senator Reardon as a grieving, but very misguided parent, and Joy and Boyd as star-crossed lovers finally getting their second chance at love. When she finished, there’d be no question which segment the superior angle was, the production team’s choice clear.

  Hopefully...

  Yet they might still choose Senator Reardon...

  Cole would see it as a betrayal.

  Should she tell him or wait until her production company picked the segment?

  If he knew now, he’d be even angrier with her... In the window’s reflection she caught her frown. No. Better to wait.