Angry Annie

by Dawn L. Chiletz

  My ego is bruised along with my knee as a trickle of blood slides down my shin.

  Strong arms reach out for me. “Are you all right?”

  With tears in my eyes I look up to Adam’s face. My heart drops.

  “I’m fine. Go away.” Pushing his hands away forcefully, I decide I’d rather stay on the ground than have him touch me.

  “Whoa,” he says taking a step back. “I was just trying to help.”

  “Haven’t you done enough?”

  “What did I do?”

  I sigh. “Do you remember that guy from the restaurant who came to my house last night? Well, I love him. I want him. And you keep showing up at the wrong time and the wrong place.”

  His eyes are soft. “You love him?”

  “Yes, I do. And I need you to hear it loud and clear. Whether he wants me or not, I’m going to fight for him like I fight for everything else in my life.”

  He tries to help me stand and I push him away again. “I’m fine. Just go. Please. I’m sorry, Adam. You’re a really great guy, just not the one for me.”

  He bends down to me. “I kind of figured that. But you can’t blame a guy for trying can you?”

  I smile because I feel awful for so many reasons. This wasn’t a scenario I’d imagined.

  “I think I’ve got this now.” His voice causes my heart to pound in my chest.

  Adam holds out his hand to Rhode and he shakes it. Adam smiles, nods to us, and jogs into the bar. I watch him only because I’m afraid to look at Rhode.

  “What are you doing, Joss?” he asks as he crouches down next to me.

  I shrug because I’m honestly not sure.

  He pulls a handkerchief from his pocket and presses it to my knee. “Can you stand?”

  I nod and he helps me up.

  “You shouldn’t run in heels.”

  “You shouldn’t make me run,” I reply curtly.

  He snickers. “So Adam is done?” he asks, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

  Fear grips me and I swallow hard as I brush off my skirt. “Did you hear us?”

  “Did you think I’d really leave you alone in a bar parking lot, let alone on the ground?”

  I shake my head.

  “Did you mean it?”

  Gazing into his eyes I reply confidently, “Every single word.”

  He tries to hold back a smile, but I don’t know why. “What’s all this?” he asks, pointing to the dirt.

  “Forget it. It was a dumb idea. The whole thing was dumb. Annie was right about me. I don’t have a clue.” I dab my knee. The bleeding seems to have stopped, but I definitely left a mark on my knee to match the one on my ego.

  “Snapdragons?” he asks as he lifts the broken pot and reclaims the flowers.

  I nod.

  “Now I need to know.”

  I shrug. I don’t want to talk anymore because my plan went to shit. I didn’t expect him to run.

  “Tell me.”

  I take a deep breath and stare at the ground because looking into his eyes just reminds me he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore.

  “They’re pretty on the outside, but if you squeeze them they look like they could hurt you. Like a dragon. But the truth is, they don’t want to hurt anyone even if they sometimes do it anyway. Maybe they’re scared and they scare you away when you touch them. But deep down, they want to be as pretty on the inside as they are on the outside. It takes someone who wants to water them and care about them for them to ever grow into the flower they’re supposed to be.”

  His head bends down and he squints up at me shyly with a slight smile. “Did they tell you all that?”

  “Yeah. I’m a plant whisperer on the side.”

  He shakes his head at my sarcasm.

  “I ruined them, though. I dropped them and now they’re worthless.”

  “It’s nothing that can’t be fixed,” he replies, gazing into my eyes. “Nothing is ever really broken.”

  I cover my face with my hands. He used my grandfather’s words and it breaks my heart.

  “I don’t know what I’m doing!” I shout through my hands. “This isn’t me. I don’t run after hot guys in parking lots and bring them flowers and make up dumb analogies because I’m afraid to say what I really feel! I usually avoid feeling altogether.”

  “You think I’m hot?” he asks with a wink.

  “So, so hot.”

  His smile fades as he gazes into my eyes. There’s so much more I need to say.

  “I’m sorry, Rhode. I never wanted to lie to you. I didn’t think it was a big deal at first because I thought Annie deserved everything I was going to give to her.”

  “And now?”

  “Now, I miss her and I miss you. I really miss you. And I want you to look at me like you did up until the other day. I want to be the best me I can be because of you. I grew up with a sister who was selfless to my selfish. She was the sweet to my salty and I thought that was the way it was supposed to be. But damn if you don’t make me want to be whipped cream with a cherry on top.”

  “You sound like Annie.”

  “Is that a bad thing?” I ask, reaching out for him, then pulling away.

  “Why did you do that?”

  “I don’t know why I did it. I thought I was willing to sacrifice everything for the sake of a by-line. But really, I’ll sacrifice everything for the sake of you.”

  He smiles. “I meant, why did pull away and not touch me?”

  “You want me to touch you?” I ask shyly.

  “You should have touched a lot more.”

  I smirk as he uses my words against me. “Do you think you could give me another chance?”

  “What did you have in mind?”

  “Can I buy you a drink? Maybe date you for a while? Is that possible? Will you have me?” I feel insecure for the first time in my life. But sometimes you have to be weak before you can be strong.

  “Your roots run deep, Joss. They were set inside me from the second I saw you.”

  “Is that a yes? The plant stuff is really over my head.”

  He drops the flowers to the ground and pulls me tightly against his chest. “It’s a yes to all of it and just so you know, I love you too. You’re exactly what I never knew I needed.”

  Placing my hands in his hair, I press my lips against his. My heart feels full for the first time in my life because I know with him by my side, my grass will always be green and I can handle all the lemons life throws at me.

  RHODE KISSES ME ON the cheek. “Come back alive, please.”

  “If I’m not back in an hour, send reinforcements.”

  “You’ve got this.”

  I nod as I walk out his front door and count my steps to Annie’s front porch.

  There’s a new sign on the front door. I place my new pot of snapdragons next to her door and read the improvements with a smile.

  “No hussies. No liars. No solicitors. I don’t like cookies. I’ve found my Lord and Savior. I already have an alarm. I don’t need you to cut my grass. I don’t like raffle tickets or children. I don’t care if you’re putting yourself through school, I’m not buying. I don’t donate anything to anyone. Beware the dog, he bites. I don’t need any new friends. I don’t care if you just moved in. I know who I’m voting for and don’t want to hear your opinions. Don’t ring the bell. Don’t knock. Don’t stand on my porch. Don’t tell me I’m famous. I already know. Stay away. I’ll never like you. They call me Angry Annie for a reason.”

  Shaking my head, I pull a pen out of my purse and add a line to the bottom. “Don’t believe anything I say. I don’t mean it.”

  I smile at my creation. It’s much better. As I’m about to knock, my phone rings. It says Seamore Publications, where I work, but if it were Claus, his name should come up on caller ID. I don’t know who else would call.

  “Hello?”

  “Joslyn Walters, I read your proposal. Make it happen. You got what you wanted. Bring her in.”

  My eyes bulge
wide and I hop up and down excitedly. “You won’t regret this, Darla!”

  “Oh, believe me, I already do.” She laughs. “I’m proud of you. Good work.”

  Holy hell. Life is falling into place. I’ve convinced Rhode and Darla, but they were like petting puppies compared to the beast I’m about to face.

  As I stand in front of Annie’s house I realize shit just got even more real. I got the man, now I need the woman. Breaking Rhode was one thing, Annie is another story altogether.

  I ring her bell and push my face up to the bars on the window to see inside. Rhode told me he saw her get her paper this morning, so I know she’s in there.

  She’s mumbling something as she stomps to the door. I smile at her through the bars and she stops cold in her tracks, turns around, and walks back toward the kitchen.

  I ring the bell again and again. Then I ring it to the tune of “Who let the dogs out.” She still doesn’t answer. “I have all day, Angry Annie!” I shout.

  Her door flies open. “Can’t you read?” she shouts. “Go away. I don’t want none of what you sellin’.”

  “Did you miss me?” I ask with a smile. “I brought you something!”

  She makes that clicking sound with her teeth and scowls at me. “Unless it’s cold hard cash, I don’t give a rat’s ass.”

  I lift the pot from the ground. “It’s better. It’s a flower.”

  She tries to close the door on me, but I put my foot inside.

  “Child, if you want to keep that scrawny foot, I suggest you get it the fuck out my door or I’m going to slam it till it closes, foot or no foot.”

  “Can we talk? Please?”

  “I ain’t got nothin’ to say to you.”

  “I know you don’t. I have something to say to you.”

  “I don’t care what you gotta say. I never did and I never will.”

  I sigh. “When I first met Rhode he told me you meant the opposite of everything. I didn’t believe him back then, but I do now.”

  “Oh, yeah. Well, then I think you is sweet as pie and I want you to never ever go away.”

  I smile. “You’re not going to get me to leave until you hear me out. You had a chance to tell me your side, now can I have a chance to say mine?”

  “No.”

  “I’ll ring your doorbell all day long.”

  “I’ll call the cops.”

  “I have a friend there.”

  “You ain’t got no friends. Ain’t nobody like your sorry lyin’ ass.”

  “You like me. I know you do. And I like you too, Annie. Now please let me in before my foot falls asleep.”

  She breathes deeply and stares me down. It’s another competition. A week or two ago, I thought I was the queen of them. Right now, I don’t care about winning anything but her friendship. I smile at her and she shakes her head.

  “Oh, for the sake of fuck, you got one minute.”

  Stepping into her foyer feels like coming home. It’s only been a little over a week since I saw her last, but I feel like I’ve been away my whole life.

  She crosses her arms and looks at her watch. “Tick tock, Joss.”

  “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I looked at a toad and didn’t see the royalty living inside of it.”

  “Child, you still make no sense. Say what you gotta say and get it over with. I ain’t got time to analyze your bullshit.”

  “You’re right. The honest truth, Annie, is that I was wrong about you. I thought I knew who you were and what kind of a person you were. Spending time with you made me see there are layers and layers to you.”

  “I ain’t no onion. You got twenty seconds.”

  “Annie, please forgive me. I didn’t write the article. I mean, I wrote an article but not one you’d expect.”

  “Ten seconds.”

  I quickly blurt out, “How does a weekly paycheck sound?”

  Her mouth shifts in circles as she stares at me and makes the clicking noise I now miss. “I’m listenin’.”

  “If there’s one thing I can count on with you, it’s that you won’t sugarcoat the truth. We need more of that in this world. Like you said before, everywhere we go, people want to sell a ship we can’t sail with a promise that won’t float. Sometimes we need the truth, no matter how much it hurts. This is what I told my boss. And guess what? She wants it. She wants you.”

  “Whatchoo talkin’ about? You done lost your mind.”

  She waves at me as she walks toward the kitchen. I follow her.

  “The Gaggle wants to offer you a job. You would have a monthly column called Angry Annie where people write in with their problems and you tell them what to do.”

  She sits down at her table and takes a sip of coffee. “That’s dumb.”

  “No, it’s not. It’s brilliant. You have so much to share, Annie. Do you have any idea how many people follow your reviews?”

  She shakes her head.

  “Seventeen thousand, four hundred and twenty-two people. Mostly between the ages of fourteen and thirty. Mostly women. But we could make you a household name. Move over, Dear Abby! Here comes Angry Annie!”

  “I don’t wanna be no household name!” she shouts, pushing off from her chair. “You need to go. I got stuff to do.”

  Furrowing my brows, I struggle with the words to reach her. “We’d be working together,” I say with a smile.

  “Oh, that makes a difference,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Why didn’t you say so to begin with? Now I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt, not in a million trillion years do I ever want to have to see you or talk to you every single day, ever again.”

  “I don’t believe you,” I say, folding my arms. “You said you didn’t give me the reviews because you didn’t want me to go away.”

  “I lied. I’m a liar too. Takes one to know one.” Annie stomps to her front door and pulls it open. “Now get out. I got somewhere I have to be.”

  I gaze down at the snapdragons I’m still holding in my hands and place them down on her table.

  I somberly walk to her door and stop just before I reach it. I lift a finger in the air. “I need to say one last thing.”

  “Oh, Lawd Jesus. Ain’t that a surprise.”

  “You and I aren’t that different. We may seem like total opposites but sometimes opposites make the best pairs. You taught me a lot about myself, Annie. You made me open my heart and my eyes. Even if you never speak to me again, you’ll always be a part of me. No one can take that away. Not even you.”

  “Take your weed with you. I don’t want that.”

  Gazing at the flower for a moment, I hope it works its magic on Annie like it did on Rhode. “It’s not a weed. It’s a snapdragon. I’m not taking it with me. I’m leaving it for you to remind you of me. It’s tall and skinny, but it grows better in bunches. It only looks bad when you squeeze it too hard. I squeezed too hard.”

  “Guess now you don’t get your big break,” she says with a cocky smile.

  I shrug. “I didn’t know they liked my idea until a few minutes ago. I was already on my way here to talk to you. It doesn’t mean that much to me anymore. Someday, I’ll do something great. I have a lot to learn.”

  As I walk down the steps, I feel her eyes boring into my back.

  “How much?”

  “How much what?” I ask, turning to face her.

  “How much this job pay? I ain’t workin’ for peanuts.”

  Annie doesn’t have to say she forgives me for me to know what’s in her heart. She may be angry on the outside, but that inside is gold. I see it and someday maybe she will too.

  Three months later

  LIFTING THE BLINDS, I try my best to peek out through the crack at Annie’s house. “Are you sure that’s what she said?” I ask, turning briefly to look at Rhode.

  “I’m sure.”

  “Tell me again. Word for word.”

  He huffs. “She said she didn’t want dinner tonight. She said she had plans.”

  “That’s not word for word.”
/>
  He sighs. “Okay, fine. I believe it was, ‘I don’t need your stinkin’ tacos. I’m getting’ my own.’”

  “With who?” I ask protectively. “Who’s getting her tacos? Do we know this person? What if it’s someone who read her column and wants to take advantage of her?”

  Rhode laughs. “I think Annie can handle herself, Joss.” He pops a piece of popcorn into his mouth and I bite at my nails.

  “Come on, babe. It’s date night. Annie is going to be just fine. I know you two are all besties now, but if she needed something she’d call. Now, are you going to stare out the window all night or are you going to sit next to me and watch a romantic movie that’s sure to make you want to have sex?”

  Twisting my mouth, I place my finger against my cheek like I’m thinking. “Such a tough call. Who do I get to have sex with?”

  He crosses his legs at the ankles and leans back against his couch. “He’s a professional landscaper. Very skilled. He heard your grass needed to be mowed and he’s even willing to plant his flowers in you for free.”

  “Plant his flowers?” I laugh.

  “I have an overabundance of seeds. They’re multiplying by the minute.”

  “Oh, really?” I ask, sitting next to him on the sofa.

  He pushes a hair away from my face and stares into my eyes. “Do you know how beautiful you are?”

  I sigh. “Let’s skip the movie and go garden now.”

  “No, no, no. I promised you a date. Since you insisted we stay in and spy on Annie, I’m going to insist we watch at least half of this movie.”

  “Are you sure you’re the guy and not me? I’d think you’d rather get me naked than stare at a TV screen.”

  His eyes darken as he adjusts the bulge in his pants. “I want you. You know that. But I also love you and I want to show you in every way possible.”

  “Where have you been all my life?” I ask as I take off his baseball cap and place it on my head.

  “Waiting for you.”

  A car door slams outside and I jump up from my seat and rush over to the blinds. “Shit! I can’t see anything. Someone is parked in front of her house.”

  “Who?” he questions.

  “I can’t tell, but I see a shadow walking up the path.”