Cross Your Mind (An Emerson Novel Book 3)

by K L Finalley

  "What's going on with you and Mallory?" Kiana struck first. She always struck first. She was fearless and uncultured, but, in some weird way, Jacqueline appreciated it and loved her best for it.

  Jacqueline laughed, "You want all the details?"

  "Hell naw!" Kiana threw her hand up.

  "See! Now, ask me what you really want to know," Jacqueline swatted her.

  "Why'd you miss the holiday," Pops asked solemnly. "You never miss the holidays. Your Mama was upset."

  "I tried to talk to her about it. You know that. I couldn't make it work. It's hard to manage. It's a lot to schedule."

  "Um hmm. Is this how it's gonna be?"

  "Dunno, Pops. It might be some years."

  "Did you come for my birthday," Uncle Ken wanted to know.

  "Of course," Jacqueline said proudly.

  "Liar," Felicia responded quickly.

  During their conversation, Zoe sprang from the sandcastle city and bounded to Jacqueline. Covered in sand, Jacqueline held her hand out as Zoe approached, "Careful Zoe, I have the baby."

  "I know, Jax. I won't wake her up. Do you see the city?"

  "I see it. It looks great."

  "Can I borrow your phone and take a picture of it?"

  "How about we do that when you're done?"

  "That's an even better idea," she said. She was heading off the deck. Then, she stopped, came back, kissed baby Imani on her forehead, and ran off again.

  "You're good with her," Aunt Latoya said.

  "Look at all the experience I've had," Jacqueline said as she swept her hand around in a motion that covered siblings and cousins alike.

  "Naw, it's different with her," Felicia noted.

  When the family encircled Jacqueline on the deck, she hadn't noticed that her mother was missing. Sheryl hadn't joined them to interrogate Jacqueline.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~

  As Mallory entered the house, the door opened to a large living area with a mammoth television mounted to the wall. There were a collection of plaid couches and old brown recliners in the room. The room felt like a place a family went to hang out and have fun without regard for fine furnishings. As she looked left, she saw the large eat-in kitchen and a huge custom made table. It didn't remind her of the custom-made furniture that Jacqueline owned. Instead, she had the feeling that Lee and Ken might have assembled it themselves. Made of wood slabs, the table appeared to seat ten, maybe twelve people. She wondered if it had been built inside the house. Its width was too large to have been brought inside the front door. In the area, that was designed as a breakfast nook, there was another custom table. Also, made of wood slabs, this table was smaller. It sat eight people. It was newer and lighter in color. She smiled when she realized that it was mostly likely made for the grandchildren. Off from the kitchen and dining area, there were two doors. Each door appeared to lead to bedrooms that Mallory had no time to explore.

  She headed up the stairs, as directed, and turned right. She walked along the hallway into the restroom. After the long journey from St. Petersburg to the Placcid Lake, her bladder denied her any additional time to snoop around. She entered the small restroom, closed the door, and did what she'd come to do. After her body had the relief it sought and her hands were washed, she checked her face and hair and exited the restroom.

  Without any sense of urgency, she scanned the pictures that decorated the hallway. Having just met the family, she could tell from their faces whose birthdays and graduations were being celebrated. She glimpsed at the various pictures of the children laughing and playing, riding bikes, playing board games. She recognized Felicia's chubby face. She could discern tiny Kiana from tall, thin Jacqueline. Xavier did have Ken's darker complexion. Mallory smiled as she stared at the children growing up in front of her eyes. As she glimpsed at their past displayed in the hallway, she noticed there were far less pictures of Jacqueline than the other children.

  Then, she wondered which bedroom was Jacqueline's room. The first room door she opened was to the left of the bathroom. The room had a king-sized bed in it, but the pink walls made Mallory smirk. She knew it was not Jacqueline's. She closed the door and headed for the bedroom to the right of the bathroom. It had two queen beds, but it was not painted. Instead, it was covered in sports-themed wallpaper and had a basketball hoop over the door. The room felt like it was one that was designed for Kamal and Khalil to share when they were young. She closed it and entered the room next door. It also had two queen beds. Much like the boys' room, it had wallpaper, but it was floral and covered in poster of movie stars and musicians. She felt that it might be Felicia's room.

  At the far end of the floor, there were two doors. With two chances left, Mallory went to the furthest door first. Inside, she saw a king size bed, an oak rolltop desk, and the only room with a view of the lake. Something about it felt like Jacqueline's room. The room's walls were not painted pink. There was no wallpaper. There were posters, but not of pop stars, but posters of places. New York. Paris. Los Angeles. She stood in the doorframe with her arms folded, sensing what Jacqueline was like as a child. The writer, the dreamer, the child yearning to be free. Mallory was smiling to herself when she heard a voice.

  "I see you figured out which room was hers," Sheryl said.

  Startled and embarrassed, "Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't snooping around. I mean, I was looking in the rooms, but I didn't go inside."

  Sheryl held her hand up, "It's okay, baby. Snoop away. I'm sure I'd do it at your house."

  "It's just nice to think of Jacqueline as a child."

  "Well, she wasn't much of one." Sheryl said. Mallory looked confused. "That daughter of mine has always been a tiny, little grown up. I s'ppose part of that is my fault."

  "She never complains about her life," Mallory attempted to reassure Sheryl.

  "That's sweet of you to say, but I doubt it's true. I know her well enough to know she didn't drive up here for this party, so what's going on?"

  "The piano."

  "The piano?" Sheryl hadn't thought about it at all.

  "Yes, she's debating if she wants to move it to our new place."

  "New place?" Sheryl was confused. "She sold the penthouse?"

  "No, not yet. We probably will in the next month or so," Mallory said with confidence.

  "We?"

  "Yes, ma'am."

  "Honey, if you're here, meeting me, and she's selling that penthouse, I don't think you need to call me ma'am," Sheryl folded her arms.

  Mallory snickered. "No, I guess not."

  Sheryl rested against the opening of the room Mallory hadn't had time to look inside of. "Q never brought anyone home for us to meet. Never. Not one. For years, I thought she was embarrassed of us. And, I'm sure that's partly true, but I asked her one day a few years ago. She told me she never found anyone to share herself with. Then, a coupla months ago, she called and told me she wasn't coming home to Miami. Did ya know home is Miami?"

  "Yes, ma'am."

  "There goes that ma'am, again." Sheryl teased and Mallory laughed. "Anyhow, she said she couldn't come, because she'd met someone. And, she couldn't make the schedules work to be home with us and make sure the woman's child could see her grandparents. Well, I was mad. Steaming mad. That girl's my first born. I gave her to my ex-husband's mother to raise, so I could sing. Did you know that?"

  "Yes, ma..."

  "Do you know about Dexter?"

  "Yes, I do," Mallory tried to look away as she admitted. She knew all of Sheryl's secrets, but she wasn't sure that she should admit that she knew them.

  "I'm guessin' you have to," Sheryl admitted. "Worst mistake of my life. Not Dexter. I was young. And, God how I loved that man. I'm sure he loved me, too, in his own way." She appeared to be thinking back on her life. "I mean, sending my baby off for years, so I could be selfish. I think it did something to her. Did somethin' to us. All the records in the world won't fix it."

  "You know, for what it's worth, I think she's proud of those moments."

  "Ya thin
k?"

  "I do."

  "I never tell people."

  "She does."

  Sheryl straightened up. She smiled. "It was a lifetime ago. Sometimes, it feels like a dream. Those kids goad me to sing every once in a while, but it feels like too much to just sing in the house. Humph." Sheryl drifted back in time. "I don't know if Jacqueline'll be good in a relationship or as a stepparent. She doesn't have a lot of experience."

  "I know."

  "And, I assume Zoe has a father out there somewhere. How's he with all of this?"

  "I can handle him."

  "Can you? This is a big pill to swallow," she said as she waved her hand in the hair. "She's her father's daughter. She won't back down easy."

  "I don't either."

  Sheryl nodded. "I'll come for her even when she thinks she doesn't need me. I'll always come for her."

  "You'll find me there," Mallory folded her arms in return.

  Sheryl turned her head and looked at her. Nodding it up and down, she said, "Somethin' makes me think you will."

  "Since we're being honest, I wanna ask you something she'd never ask," Mallory had found her courage. The cards had been placed on the table and Mallory thought the time had come to play them.

  "Well, I like this already. No one's ever honest. Are they?" Sheryl unfolded her arms and stood up in the doorframe.

  Mallory stood up tall and unfolded her arms, as well. "We've been merging finances…"

  "I know where this is going..." Sheryl interrupted.

  "Do you need it? Or, is it habit? If you need it, you need it. If it's habit, tell her to stop." Mallory squinted her eyes. She was more than comfortable to talk in code.

  A grin slid over Sheryl's face, but she didn't answer Mallory's question. She didn't indicate what she was going to do, but rather she pulled out of the doorframe. She placed her arm around Mallory's shoulder, and professed, "You remind me of myself. Let's go join the others. I'm hungry."

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~

  When Mallory strutted outside, she walked behind Jacqueline and placed her hand on her shoulder. Jacqueline stopped talking to her sister and looked up into Mallory's green eyes, "Everything okay? You were gone for a while."

  "Everything's just fine," Sheryl answered instead. Jacqueline looked over at her mother who had taken a seat next to Pops. Her mother didn't make eye contact. There were no comments, no giggles, no gleams of indignation that usually appeared on her mother's face. Jacqueline wasn't certain how to feel.

  Mallory rubbed the top of Imani's head who lifted her tiny face up to look at her. "Aw, she's awake. Jax, let me hold her." With that, Mallory pulled the baby out of Jacqueline's arms and onto her own shoulder.

  "Jax?" Kiana repeated. "I think I like that better than Q. Jax."

  "Do you wanna sit down with her?" Jacqueline asked Mallory.

  Talking to Imani, Mallory said, "Tell her we're just fine." Bouncing the quiet baby, Mallory looked about the yard, she saw the sand castle village. She saw children riding bikes and playing games. Before panic set in, she asked, "Where's Zoe?"

  Felicia pointed to the lake. Out in the distance, there was a blond little girl with life vest on riding in front of a black man on a jet ski. It was Xavier. Mallory knew it was him. The man was wearing white tube socks. "That girl's gonna sleep good tonight."

  "Are y'all planning to head back home?" Sheryl asked.

  "Yeah, it's only about two hours away. We'll let her tucker out and then head back."

  "No way! You gotta stay here. You know, we got enough room. You can sleep in your room. Zoe can bunk with the kids," Pops configured.

  "Pops, we don't have pajamas or toothbrushes or her makeup," Jacqueline retorted.

  "We can make do," Pops insisted.

  "I've got nightgowns and what-not of Tiana's she can wear. And, I've got my travel case. I can hook up that makeup in the morning," Kiana said.

  "Wait, what do you do?" Mallory's interest was sparked.

  "Kiana does makeup," Khalil said seated on the deck playing on his phone.

  "Thanks, Khalil. Actually, I'm a Field Leader for an international cosmetics company," she corrected.

  "My bad. She does good makeup," Khalil said.

  "You're such an asshole!" Kiana said.

  "Watch your language," Sheryl snapped.

  "Don't listen to him. Just know I got you if y'all wanna stay," Kiana said to Mallory as she made an inappropriate hand gesture to her cousin when her mother wasn't watching.

  "Um, we have to stay just so you can give me pointers. I'd love to see what you can show me," Mallory was excited.

  "Then, it's settled. The whole family's together tonight after all." Pops threw his fists into air in victory. Then, he and Ken sprang to their feet.

  "Lee, where are you going? " Sheryl asked.

  "We gotta start the grill. We got mouths to feed." Lee said as Ken trailed behind him.

  Uncertain of how this had happened, Jacqueline walked to where Mallory was standing. "Hey."

  "Hi, honey."

  "How are you?" Jacqueline asked.

  "Fine. I'm having a great time with your family," Mallory said as she swayed the baby in the breeze.

  "I'm not," She said sing-songy.

  "You're fine."

  "Why are we staying here? We have a bayfront condo two hours away," Jacqueline said.

  "It'll be nice. You couldn't visit for Thanksgiving, so let's stay. And, Zoe's having a blast."

  "Did you hear me mention that I'm not? I hate this house of dread. Those weren't great times."

  Mallory faced her. She placed her head on her chest and said, "We'll change those memories together. Me, you, Zoe, and Imani." Imani cooed at Jacqueline.

  "You know, they are why I drink, right?" Jacqueline knew that she had lost this battle and decided not to speak. She took a deep breath and returned to her seat on the deck.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~

  The ribs, the bar-b-que chicken, the lobster, the macaroni and cheese, the salad, the baked beans, and the key lime pie were delicious. Mallory had eaten all of the meal without worry of extra calories or what ingredients the dishes contained. She laughed at the conversation until her throat was sore. She felt included and happy. That's when she realized that this is what Zoe wanted. She looked over at her daughter sitting at a smaller table with the children. They were helping the younger children to eat, but they were also laughing among themselves. She had gotten a suntan today and her blue eyes looked heavy with exhaustion. Mallory glanced to her right. Jacqueline was sitting upright in her chair resting against the back of it. She was arguing with her cousin, Kamal, about baseball. He was lauding about last year's Yankee season and she looked like she might hit him.

  Without thought, without regard, Mallory announced, "We hope to have a new place by the first week of April. When we do, we're having a big party and we want all of you to come. We'll send you invitation as soon as we have a date." She said it all in a rush. She was so excited and so happy.

  "Can the kids come, too?" Zoe asked from the kids' table.

  "Of course, they can," Mallory said.

  "Well, we'd be delighted. Thank you for inviting us, Mallory," Sheryl said and walked over and hugged her.

  The room fell silent. A hug from Sheryl on the first meeting was unheard of. She hadn't seen Jacqueline since Mother's Day and hadn't hugged her, but here she was in a deep embrace with Mallory.

  Breaking the silence, Kiana said, "On that note, I'm gonna start bath time. Come on, Dane."

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Bath time took hours. Eighteen adults and five children of varying ages with varying amounts of bathing and washing and shaving to do. Towards the end of the period, Mallory emerged from her shower, dressed in an old Dolphins t-shirt of Jacqueline's and a pair of shorts that belonged to Shanika before her pregnancy. As she walked out of the bathroom, she was still drying her hair, but she announced, "I'm out. Who's next?"

  She hadn't noticed that bedroom doorways were open and the famil
y were standing in them. As she crossed to Jacqueline's old room, Felicia stopped her. Xavier was in the room lying Imani in her playpen. "Wait a second. Don't say a word. Just wait a second."

  "What are we all waiting for?" Mallory asked. She let the towel fall from her hair. Felicia was holding her arm, so that she wouldn't walk away. She wanted to make her let go, but it seemed that Felicia was serious. She looked around for Jacqueline, but she didn't see her. Instead, she saw Kiana and Derrick in the doorframe of the room with two queen beds. Khalil was eating a rib standing in the doorframe of the basketball room. Looking down the stairs, she saw Lee and Latoya looking up, but she never saw what everyone was looking at. Then, finally, she heard a chord. Then, there was another. Then, another. They were random chords. They weren't really a song. It was as if someone was just striking chords to see if they would work. Some of the chords were louder than others. When a soft one was hit, she heard Jacqueline suck her teeth. When a loud one was hit, she heard her sigh. Then she moved to the scales. Then, there was silence. Finally, Mallory realized the sounds came from the room. It was the door that Sheryl leaned against when she and Mallory were talking. That was the room where the piano sat. Mallory hadn't had time to look inside of it before Sheryl appeared and now, Jacqueline was in there, but Felicia had her in her grips.

  Mallory asked, "Why don't we go over there?"

  Holding her back, Felicia cautioned her, "She'll stop playing. Does she play when you're around or does she stop when she knows you're there?"

  She thought of how Jacqueline won't play the violin in the condo when Mallory's there. "But, why?"