The Shifter's Secret

by R. A. Boyd

  Jace scrubbed his hand down his face and then around to the back of his neck. He rubbed there for a few moments, trying to find the right thing to say. Slowly, he shook his head from side to side. “No. The Rogues are everywhere. We don’t know who they all are. I mean, the Gold Wing clan members who’ve infiltrated their clan can identify some. From what I hear, they are pouring in from everywhere.”

  “This doesn’t make any fucking sense,” he said, balling one hand into a fist and shaking it at Jace. “This time last year, nobody cared that you lived here or that you even existed. This is crazy.”

  Jace lowered his eyes, looking at the natural grain of the hardwood flooring. “Samiyah started the Rogue clan seventy years ago. He was preparing them for the day we were whole. This has been going on for a long time. As long as our beasts were locked away, we were acceptable. But now, after Samiyah injecting fear into the community, they think we want to control the entire supernatural world. We don’t. We just want to live peacefully with our family.”

  “Could you and your clan take over? If you wanted to?” Shaun’s dark eyes bore into him as if ready to sniff out any lie Jace gave him.

  Honesty. Complete and total honesty. Jace swallowed a few times, a lump lodged deep in his throat at what he was about to admit. But the father of his mate deserved the truth. “If me and my brethren, all of us, were joined with our mates and got together and put our minds to it, yes. We could. We’re angels, Shaun. Fallen angels, but angels nonetheless. And saber-tooth cats. And immortal. I’m not even including our brethren in the Coven of the Fallen. Who are also fallen angels. We disagree on some shit, but we all stick together. Accept for Samiyah. He sucks. Bullets, knives, all that shit means nothing. We are powerful. We heal. Fast. But taking over means nothing to us. We just want to live in peace. Raise families. Protect our loved ones.”

  A desperate plea filled Shaun’s eyes as he moved in so close to Jace that he almost came tumbling out of his chair. “Can you change Emma? So she can be strong and keep her and Lily safe? I. Can’t. Lose them.” He poked Jace in the arm as he punctuated his words.

  The thought of changing Emma had taken up space in his mind too many times within the last twenty-four hours, but she seemed to have no desire to be bitten. For all he knew, he would still follow them around and keep an eye on them.

  Glancing over his shoulder to see Emma still chewing on her nail as her fearful eyes darted around the room, Jace gave one shake of his head. “She’d be a shifter, but not immortal. Besides, she hasn’t asked me. And,” he said, turning back to Shaun, “that wouldn’t stop the Rogues from coming after us. They have a powerful witch inhabiting the body of a monster of a Ghost shifter. This shit would still be going on, and we’d still be scrambling to keep our people safe.”

  The long afternoon glided into an even longer evening at Shaun’s house. Jace did everything he could to put him at ease, but there was nothing he could say to quell the man’s fear. He’d be a shit father if he wasn’t worried about his family.

  Watching Shaun interact with his grand-daughter helped keep the peace Jace was forcing in to himself. Shaun kept Lily’s favorite foods and made dinner for the beautiful ball of giggles as the evening wore on. Emma gave her a bath at her father’s house, changing her into a pair of pajamas that were her second favorite pair. She’d fallen asleep on the ride home, and despite Jace’s insistent claim that he could carry Lily up to her bedroom, Emma denied his request. I just want to hold her close, she’d said as she unbuckled her from the car seat. Lily woke long enough to use the bathroom and ask Emma not to sleep in her very own ‘big-girl’ bed. Jace watched as Emma fought herself, grabbing hold of every bit of willpower she had not to lie down next to Lily after she’d fallen asleep.

  For a long time, he watched as Emma stood outside of Lily’s room, a sentry guarding her most prized possession. Leaning against the door frame with her arms folded across her chest, she peeked through the space in the door and watched her daughter sleep.

  Jace kept his distance as the momma bear protectively looked in on her cub. After about an hour, she began shifting from one foot to the other, probably trying to stay upright after the tiring day.

  His insides raged, his beast confused as to what to do next. He wanted to let the saber-tooth take his body so he could walk the perimeter of the Ghost community to make sure the protections spells held true, but something deep in his soul wouldn’t allow him to leave either one of them.

  “You think she’ll be upset she missed another dinner?” Jace walked up behind Emma and stared at Lily’s sleeping form.

  Emma sighed and leaned into his body, allowing him to support her. That small act of acquiescence warmed him from the inside out.

  “Yeah,” she said. Nodding, she rubbed her hands up and down her bare arms. “She’s going to be really pissed. But breakfast will make up for it.” She kneaded the muscles of her neck and moved again, leaning against the wall but still keeping contact with him. “Will you keep an ear on her while I take a shower? I know she’s safe here, but I won’t be able to fully hear the monitor while the water runs in the bathroom.”

  With gentle ease, he moved her hands away from her neck and placed his palms on her shoulders. He massaged the taut muscles there. He tilted his head and whispered in her ear. “Absolutely. I cooked spaghetti and garlic bread. You can eat when you’re done.”

  “I can’t eat.” Her words were so low, he almost missed them.

  Pressing the pads of his thumbs into the soft tissue on either side of her spine, he stroked up and down, trying to smooth out a knot in her muscles. She winced when he hit the spot, but asked him to keep going when he tried to pull away.

  “That feels so freaking good,” she said, head now rolled forward as she melted into him. “Look at her,” she muttered. “All this crap going on around her and she has no idea. And that’s the way it should be. I need her to never question her safety. She’s too young.”

  Jace agreed wholeheartedly. He wished he could have kept this shit-show from the both of them, but apparently his brother knew that he had found his mate the day she gave him back his grace. No matter how far away Emma’s dad wanted to take them, Ronin wouldn’t stop until he got what he wanted. Jace would protect his family until Ronin was himself again. Or dead. Right now, he was okay with either one.

  “Your brother is still in there, Jace. After Audra cut him, your brother broke through and spoke to her.”

  Audra hadn’t brought that up. Hell, she didn’t even want to talk about anything until dinner tonight. It was best Lily wasn’t there. His clan needed to know everything that was happening, and Lily sitting there and soaking up all of their conversations was not what she needed.

  “What did he say?” he asked, hands still working to comfort his mate.

  “He asked Audra to kill him. And said that Samiyah couldn’t be exercised from his body,” she said, turning her head to look at him. Her eyes were half-closed, and the sides were tinged with red. She was tired. “Jace, I think he’d rather die than hurt any of you. He’s trapped. And I…” The burnt citrus scent of shame emanated from her like it had earlier. “I thought about killing him. He asked your sister to do it, but I knew she couldn’t. She’s been through so much. But I was going to.”

  “Baby, it’s okay. You don’t have to be ashamed because you wanted to end this.”

  “No,” she cried out, bringing her hands to cover her face. She dug the palms of her hands into her eyes and shook her head. “Even after I found out your brother was still in there, I intended to kill him. If I thought for just one minute that knife would have cut through bone so that I could behead him, I would have done it. I wanted to kill your brother, and I’m so sorry.”

  Jace stiffened as she sobbed, shoulders shaking as she fought to hold in the sound as not to wake Lily.

  He knew she was in pain. Emma never cried. Maybe she’d changed over the last five years, but Jace remembered all too well how she kept raw emotions to herse
lf. She held on to things, letting them build up until she could barely contain them. Most of the time, those pent up feelings would somehow transform into anger. It didn’t happen often, but he remembered the times it did. She was a hairpin trigger, just waiting for the slightest bit of pressure to let loose.

  “Come on,” he said, wrapping her up tight in his embrace until she curled her arms around his neck and nodded. “Lily’s safe. You have the monitor and we’ll hear everything.” The long coils of her hair tickled his lips as he whispered into her ear. “Let me feed you. You’re hungry.”

  They walked to the master bedroom, three rooms away from Lily. Just as they entered, Emma turned back to the room where Lily slept. He thought she would push him away and return to her guard. But she didn’t.

  “Do you want me to go close the door?” he asked.

  She pulled her lips in a few times as if trying to figure out the right answer. “Yes.”

  As she started to walk away, he touched her hand and took the monitor from her. “Take a shower. Soak in the tub. Whatever you want. I’ll keep the monitor with me. And I’ll fix your plate so you can eat when you’re done.”

  She started to protest, but he bent closer and lightly kissed her lips. A soft moan escaped her as her lips softened against his.

  “You’re hungry,” he said, reaching out and tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “Just eat a little bit. It’ll be ready when you come out of the bathroom. Okay?”

  “Okay. Maybe I should shower in the room where my stuff is. I don’t feel like loading my stuff back and forth.”

  His breath hitched in his throat. “Yeah,” he said, running his tongue along his top row of teeth. “I moved a lot of your stuff into my room. Not everything,” he interjected quickly. “Just your shower shit and pajamas so you didn’t have to worry about it.”

  She studied him, eyes roaming across his face as she chewed on her bottom lip. Maybe he screwed up. This wasn’t taking things slow, but fuck it. He wanted her close, and he believed she wanted the same thing.

  “M-kay,” she said, still worrying her bottom lip. “I’m okay with that.” Without hesitation, she turned around and walked through his bedroom. She was about to go into his closet but must have noticed the light on in the bathroom. When she walked through the bathroom door, she stifled a gasp and looked back at him. “Holy crap. This bathroom is huge. You updated it. Can I keep it?”

  Thank God her playful nature hadn’t abandoned her. Ghosting him with a smile, she turned back to the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

  He stood there for a few moments, watching the door until the sound of the showerhead played in his ears. He imagined her standing in front of the sliding shower door, hand outstretched until the water reached the perfect temperature. The image of her undressing played in his head, and he could tell the instant she stepped under the hot running water.

  “That feels great,” she said, her voice seeming to relax as he listened in on her.

  Every part of him wanted to make sure she was as comfortable as possible. Despite the crazy that was their constant companion, he needed to make sure the Ghost shifter community was a safe haven for both Emma and Lily. Especially his house.

  He turned on his heel and moved toward Lily’s room. Just as he was about to close the door, she shifted in her bed, letting go of a soft sigh as she stretched out just like a starfish. He smiled and shook his head, his heart tethering itself to her even more.

  The bedsheet and light blanket stayed in place as she turned, exposing her little arms to the cool air. Even from here he could see tiny goosebumps pop up on her arm. She was cold.

  As quiet as he could, he walked toward her bed and pulled the blanket up to cover her shoulders. He didn’t want her to get cold as the night went on. He also didn’t want her to get too hot. Damn-it, what was the air conditioning on? Unless it was hot as hell or a typical Maryland freezing winter, he never bothered with adjusting the thermostat. This was something he needed to add to his list.

  Bending down, he kissed the top of her head. “Sleep well, Little One.”

  He left the bedroom and closed the door behind him. Double-checking the volume of the monitor, he went downstairs and warmed up a plate of dinner for Emma. As her food heated in the microwave, he walked to the thermostat and check the temperature.

  Sixty-eight degrees. Too cold for a four-year-old. At least he thought so. He would ask Emma when she finished in the bathroom, but until then he would set it to seventy-two. That sounded about right.

  He carried the monitor around the kitchen as he moved. His hearing was damn near perfect, but he wanted to make sure he heard every little noise Lily made, just in case he needed to wake her from a bad dream. How the hell had he gone his entire life without being around children? It made something quake in his soul to think of how much headspace the little wonder had already taken up. Taking her into consideration was his new privilege.

  After getting dinner ready for Emma, Jace put everything she would need on a tray to carry up to their bedroom. As he reached the landing, Emma came tipping out of Lily’s room, a tender smile on her face as she gave her daughter one more lingering look.

  She noticed him watching her and smiled. That beautiful smile widened and reached her eyes when she saw the tray. “I was coming downstairs to eat,” she whispered, closing the door.

  “No.” Jace aimed his chin toward the bedroom and motioned with the tray. “You should rest. Eat, watch television, sleep.”

  He took a deep breath as she walked by him, and her sexy scent mixed with her floral soap filled his senses. His cock instantly went rigid when she stood on her toes and kissed his chin, warm breath caressing his neck as she spoke. It calmed a piece of his soul to have her so close.

  “Thank you for taking care of us.”

  Chapter 9

  The savory aroma of the spaghetti sauce, garlic bread, and roasted vegetables drifted from the food as Emma took the cover from the plate. Despite what happened at her father’s house, she was hungrier than she thought. She had watched blood and actual guts seep from Ronin’s body and into her father’s yard, feeding the grass with a kind of macabre moisture that would taint the land forever. That backyard would never look the same to her.

  It amazed her that Ronin wasn’t dead. After Audra shook and launched him into the woods behind her dad’s house, Emma couldn’t believe he’d manage to get up and walk away. Jace and Zeke showed up moments after Audra’s flung him, and Jace instantly followed the trail of blood and gore that led to the woods. He was gone.

  How could Emma not be afraid of someone who’d taken a beating as he did? Stabbed, kicked in the face, mauled by a saber-tooth and then thrown at least thirty meters away, yet still, he got up and evaded two men who were healthy and whole. This was getting scary.

  “Stop,” Jace said, deep voice clearing her thoughts away.

  Her gaze shot up to see him peeling his shirt from his torso and over his head. She tried not to gape at his solid form. The lines of muscles beneath his skin rolled as he moved, showing how muscular he was. If his objective was to make her mind go somewhere other than what happened earlier, mission accomplished.

  She cleared her throat and grabbed the fork wrapped up in a napkin. “What do you mean?”

  “You’re thinking about things you can’t control. I know it’s hard, but try to forget that stuff for the rest of the night. You and Lily are safe. You’re in bed with dinner and the remote control. Relax and watch whatever you want. I’m going to take a shower.”

  She swallowed thickly as he reached behind her, propping up the pillows so she could sit comfortably while she ate and watched television. Her nerves were all over the place. Fear of what was happening was inevitable, but so was the heat she felt bloom over her skin as Jace pampered her. He was still the same man she dated years ago.

  He’d always been affectionate, doting over her yet still managing to keep from being over-baring. That would have chased her away.
She had always been independent, but sometimes giving in to someone who wanted to take care of you was priceless. He had told her once that he loved the fact that she didn’t need him, but wanted him to be in her life. She didn’t understand until she was healing from her broken heart.

  Emma had met people who’d become so engulfed in a relationship that they’d lost themselves. They’d grown to need the person they loved more than they needed themselves, and that was something that never quite sat well with her. People being in loving, all-encompassing relationships and having that emotion reciprocated was awesome, but sometimes it was toxic. Needing someone who didn’t need you back could be detrimental. But knowing that you could live without someone but didn’t want to seemed better to her.

  There were only a few people she needed: Lily and her father. Emma needed her mother, but when she was snatched away from their lives it dug a chasm deep inside her that could never be filled.

  Her mother had warned her years ago. ‘Be with someone you love, someone you want and who wants you back. Don’t need someone so much that everything good inside of you leaves if they leave you.’ It hadn’t made sense to her then, but as the years went on it grew more and more apparent to her. ‘I will always love your father, and in some ways I do need him. But if anything happens to him, the best of me won’t die with him. And vice versa. We complement one another. Make each other better. That’s the kind of love you want.’ Mom had been so wise.

  God, Emma wished like hell her mom was still here to talk to.

  Jace kneeled next to the bed. “You’re still doing it,” he said. He reached over and ran his thumb down her cheek and across her lips, tracing the outline of her pout. “What are you thinking about?”