An Honorable Man

by Margaret Watson

  “Like trying to intimidate me in public like this?” She tried to step away but he put his arms on either side of her, trapping her only inches away from him.

  “Do you think that’s what I’m trying to do, intimidate you?” He smiled, a curving of his lips that was completely without humor. “If I was trying to intimidate you, it wouldn’t be like this.” Without moving his head, he scanned the area around them with his eyes.

  “Where do you think they are, Julia? The people who are watching us, I mean. Maybe they’re two cars down the block from us. Maybe they’re across the street.” He shifted, bringing his mouth close to her ear. “Maybe they’re hidden somewhere so we can’t see them. But they’re here. Don’t ever think otherwise.”

  His breath stirred the hairs next to her ear and made her shiver. She wasn’t cold, though. Far from it. Her body pulsed with heat. She had to get away from him, but if she moved at all it would be into his arms. So she stood perfectly still and waited for him to back up.

  “Haven’t we stood here long enough to convince them?” she asked, trying to disguise the breathlessness in her voice. “I’ll go in your car with you—just move away from me.”

  He pulled back slowly, watching her with an odd, shuttered expression on his face. “You’re right, they’ve had enough of a show. Let’s go.”

  She had to practically run to keep up with him as he strode down the street. When he finally stopped beside an old, dented blue sedan, she took a couple of deep breaths as she waited for him to unlock the door. At least he drove a big car. She could sit right next to the door and she wouldn’t have to worry that he would accidentally brush against her while he was turning the wheel.

  He slammed the door just a bit harder than he needed to and got in on the other side. Starting the engine, he gunned the motor and pulled out into traffic without any warning.

  “How many safe driving certificates do you have?” she murmured under her breath.

  Apparently he heard her. Without taking his eyes off the rearview mirror, he said, “When you think someone’s tailing you, a few sudden moves can tell you a lot. For instance, when that black car peeled out of the parking lot where you left your car, I definitely took an interest in it.”

  Instinctively she swiveled around to look out the back window, but he put his hand on her cheek and gently pushed her face forward again. “Loving looks at me are okay, but don’t look for our friends in back of us. I don’t want them to know I’ve made them.”

  Jerking her head away from his hand, she eased closer to the door. “Why don’t we just talk about the case?”

  “Fine with me. Shoot.”

  “Did you have a chance to read the material I gave you?”

  “Most of it. It doesn’t prove squat.”

  “I know it doesn’t,” she answered impatiently. “But didn’t it raise some questions in your mind?”

  She saw his knuckles whiten on the steering wheel as he stared straight ahead. Finally, his lips compressed into a tight line, he said, “You’re assuming they’re guilty, but I’m assuming they’re innocent. What I saw in those files was a lot of innuendo and supposition. There was no proof in the material you gave me. But there’s a funny thing about suspicion and innuendo. Throw enough of it around, and some of it is bound to stick. Pretty soon it doesn’t matter if there’s proof or not.”

  She felt her temper begin to simmer. “Are you implying that everything in those files is a product of my imagination?”

  “Of course not.” He glanced over at her, and she saw equal parts anger and wariness in his gaze. “I’m sure that every single innuendo is well documented.” His gaze softened slightly. “I think that you’re too rigid, Julia. You see things one way, and when something doesn’t fit your view you make it fit.”

  Her anger flared and burst into flames. “You know nothing about me, McKinley. Nothing at all. You have no right to sit there and tell me what I’m about. I didn’t hire you to psychoanalyze me, I hired you to help me solve a case. And until you know me, I’ll thank you to keep your personal comments to yourself.”

  “Touched a nerve, did I?” he said softly. Looking past her out the window, he suddenly spun the steering wheel to the right and pulled in next to the curb.

  Turning to her in the semidarkness of the twilight, he said in a low voice, “You’re right, I don’t know you at all. I guess I’ll have to remedy that.”

  Before she could react, he reached down the length of the bench seat and unbuckled her seat belt. Curling one hand around her shoulders, he pulled her slowly toward him.

  One part of her mind yelled out a warning, told her to scramble out of the car now. The other part, the part that was in control, trembled with anticipation. She’d been fascinated with this man for two years, had fantasized about him just as long. She knew he was all wrong for her, knew it was dangerous to get involved with him, but she couldn’t stop. Just once, she wanted to see if her fantasies matched the reality.

  His mouth descended slowly, almost unwillingly. When he touched her lips with his, she felt him tense and strain away from her. It was almost as if she could read his mind. He wanted to tear his mouth away from hers, thrust her away from him. Suddenly, with a groan, he wrapped his arms around her and took her mouth in a frenzy of hunger.

  Fire leapt through her veins and engulfed her as if she was dry tinder. Never before had she felt such instant desire, such immediate passion. The case, her brother Bobby, the things that had happened between them in the past were all forgotten. All that mattered was the man she held so tightly.

  Luke closed his eyes and felt her lips against his, returning his kiss with a passion. His arms tightened around her, pulling her slim body closer to his hard and throbbing one. This was madness, he told himself as he slanted his mouth over hers and felt her lips softening and opening to him. This was the woman he had hated for the last two years, the woman who had shattered what little was left of his life after the accident.

  He couldn’t want her with this savage desire that threatened to engulf him. She moved her hand and touched his neck with a tentative, fluttering touch, and he felt his body tighten into one hard mass of trembling, wanting flesh. Never before had one kiss so completely overwhelmed him.

  He had to stop now, he told himself frantically. He hadn’t lost control like this, not ever. Not even as a hormone-crazed teenager in the back seat of a car. Drawing his mouth away from hers, he slowly untangled his arms from her. As he drew away, a subtle scent of herbs and flowers drifted up to him. He’d been so hot for her he hadn’t even noticed it until now.

  She seemed to come to her senses at the same time as he did. As she backed away, appalled, he watched as her face bleached of color. Touching her lips as if they still tingled, she looked at him with huge eyes in her pale face. In the rapidly falling darkness, they stared at each other for a long minute, neither of them speaking.

  He forced himself to look away first and turned the key in the ignition. There was no sign of the black car in his rearview mirror, but then he didn’t think whoever was following them would be stupid enough to park where he could easily be seen. He risked a glance over at Julia. She still stared at him with the same appalled look on her face. He felt his anger stir and deliberately fanned the flames. Anger was better than the bitter hurt he would otherwise feel at her reaction to his kiss.

  “I guess we know each other a little better, Investigator. Is it all right for me to make personal comments now?”

  She didn’t answer, and he glanced at her again. Her back was turned to him and she stared out the window. She held herself stiffly, and for just a moment he wondered if she was crying. He looked back at the road and silently shook his head. Julia Carleton was one tough cookie. He’d bet she never cried.

  He stopped at a red light, and in the silence he heard her draw a ragged breath. His anger faded as quickly as it had arisen, only a weary futility remaining.

  “I’m sorry, Julia. I had no right to say that. I had no
right to kiss you, either, for that matter.”

  “Forget it,” she said, her voice low. He had to strain to hear her. “It’s all part of the show for whoever’s following us, right?”

  “Right.” They could pretend it was all make-believe, that the incredible passion that had flared between them for a brief instant never existed. They could pretend a lot of things, but he wasn’t sure he’d be able to force his body to believe them late in the night.

  As he drove north, he tried to block the disturbing images of her from his mind by keeping track of the black car. It had reappeared soon after he restarted the car and was carefully staying a few cars behind them. He reached the turnoff for her street and hesitated. They had to know where Julia lived, but suddenly he didn’t want to abandon her there, knowing someone was stalking her.

  “I don’t want to drop you off just yet and leave you by yourself. How about coming back to my office with me for a while? I have a client coming in soon, and after I see her I can take you home.”

  “I’m perfectly content staying by myself, Mr. McKinley,” she answered, her voice brittle. “I told you once before I didn’t hire you to be my bodyguard.”

  He rolled to a stop at another red light and looked over at her, unable to suppress the hot desire that licked through him at her words. His hands ached with the need to touch her again. “No, by God, you didn’t, did you?”

  The air in the car tensed as they stared at each other. Emotions swirled around them, shifting and changing in the charged atmosphere of the car. Finally an impatient driver behind them honked and Luke jerked his gaze away from her and gunned the engine.

  After a few more blocks he said quietly, “I don’t want to leave you alone in your apartment until I can check it out and see what the goons behind us are going to do. If it makes you feel better, it’s strictly business. Now will you come to my office with me? I don’t want to keep Mrs. Bernowski waiting.”

  “Fine,” she muttered.

  Twenty minutes later they pulled up in front of the building that housed Luke’s office. Julia looked at the building that towered over them. In the daylight, it was just another shabby office that had seen its best days a long time ago. At night, it looked a lot more sinister.

  Parking by the curb, he opened the door for her and ushered her into the building. The hall was dim and gloomy, all the tenants long since gone home for the night. The low-wattage light bulbs in the overhead fixtures cast bizarre shadows on the walls as they climbed the stairs, and their footsteps echoed hollowly on the scuffed linoleum as they approached his office.

  “Do you see many clients at night?” She forced herself to speak in what she thought was a normal tone of voice as she reined in her imagination.

  He cast her an amused glance. “Spooky place, isn’t it? And yes, I do see a lot of my clients at night.” He turned the key in the door and flicked on a light, waiting for her to precede him into the room. “For a lot of different reasons.”

  Walking past her, he flopped in his desk chair. “Mrs. Bernowski works all day. This is the only time she can get over here to see me.”

  Eyeing the red leather couch dubiously, she finally lowered herself cautiously onto the worn cushion. When it didn’t sway or shift, she settled back against it and watched McKinley pull a file out of an open drawer.

  He had surprised her tonight. She hadn’t expected him to kiss her, and she certainly hadn’t expected the response she’d sensed in him. It had been almost as surprising as her own response to him.

  She squirmed on the sofa as she remembered the abandoned way she’d thrown herself into his arms and pressed against his hard body, the way she’d kissed him back with a passion she hadn’t believed possible.

  Thank goodness he’d seemed as shaken and surprised by the whole business as she had been. There were too many reasons, all of them obvious, why she could never get involved with a man like Lucas McKinley. And right now, she had an even better one—her brother Bobby. Protecting Bobby was the reason she’d come to Luke in the first place. She’d better not forget that when her hormones began to stir.

  She heard footsteps coming slowly up the stairs and swiveled around to face the door. Had the people in the black car behind them decided to take advantage of the deserted building and pay them a visit?

  Luke looked up and listened to the footsteps, then stood and opened the door to the corridor. “Mrs. Bernowski,” she heard him say. “How are you doing tonight?”

  A middle-aged woman walked into the office, dressed in a plain dark blue dress and black sweater. Her head was covered by a scarf, and she walked heavily over to the chair next to Luke’s desk.

  “Have you found out about my Piotyr?” Her voice was heavily accented, and she leaned toward Luke anxiously. “He is not in trouble, no?”

  McKinley leaned forward and took the old woman’s hand. “Not now he’s not, but I’m afraid he’s going to get in trouble soon if he doesn’t stay away from the boys he’s spending time with. They aren’t good boys, Mrs. Bernowski. They do bad things, and they’ll eventually make your Piotyr do bad things.”

  Even from across the room Julia could see the older woman squeezing Luke’s hand. “What do I do, Mr. McKinley?” she whispered.

  Luke covered her hand with his other one. “I’ll see what I can do. When a boy is seventeen, he doesn’t want to listen to his mother. Maybe he’ll listen to me.”

  “Thank you,” Mrs. Bernowski said brokenly. “My Piotyr, he’s all I have left. I don’t know what I’d do if anything happened to him.” She pulled her hand away from Luke’s and fumbled in her purse. Julia assumed she was reaching for tissues, but instead she pulled out a roll of money.

  “I can pay you this much today, Mr. McKinley. You tell me how much more I owe you.”

  Luke closed her hand around the money and gently pushed it back into her purse. “There will be plenty of time for paying when Piotyr has been straightened out. Right now we’re going to concentrate on him, not on how much money is owed.”

  Suddenly Julia realized why Luke’s office was so shabby. He probably didn’t take money from half his clients if the way he treated Mrs. Bernowski was any indication. She could tell by the look on his face he had no intention of accepting money from her, now or later. She watched as he helped the old woman from the chair and escorted her toward the door. In spite of herself, her heart softened as she saw the solicitous way he held the woman’s arm.

  The woman stopped when she saw Julia sitting on the couch, and looked up at Luke uncertainly. “This woman is here about my Piotyr?”

  Luke glanced over at her. “This is Julia Carleton, another one of my clients. She doesn’t have anything to do with Piotyr.”

  Reassured, Mrs. Bernowski smiled at Julia. “You have chosen well. If anyone can help you, it is Mr. McKinley.”

  Julia smiled slightly in response. “I hope so.”

  Julia saw the old woman’s eyes sharpen as she looked at her. “I have seen you before.” She stared at Julia, and her eyes narrowed. “You were in the newspapers when Mr. McKinley had his troubles. I know, because I checked on him before I hired him.” She turned away from Luke’s supporting arm and faced Julia accusingly. “You are the policewoman who removed him from his job.”

  “I was the one who investigated him, yes,” Julia answered in a low voice. “But I didn’t remove him from the police force. He did that himself when he beat that drunken driver almost to death.”

  Chapter 4

  Mrs. Bernowski studied her for what seemed like a long time, and Julia found herself wanting to look away. Instead she lifted her chin and returned the old woman’s stare, ignoring the guilt that tried to surface. Finally Mrs. Bernowski shook her head and turned back to Luke.

  “That one, she has no pity in her, no softness. She doesn’t deserve your help.”

  “You’re a good friend, Mrs. B.” Julia almost didn’t recognize the gentle murmur as McKinley’s voice. “Don’t you worry about me. You take care of Piotyr
and let me worry about Ms. Carleton.”

  Their voices mixed and the words became indistinguishable as McKinley walked the other woman down the stairs. Julia heard the building door open and close. After what seemed like forever, Luke’s footsteps started back up the stairs.

  He shut the door behind him and walked slowly over to his desk chair. Lowering himself into it, he gazed down at his hands for a long time. Finally he said, “I wouldn’t have done anything differently, you know.” When he looked up at her, his eyes were flat and hard.

  “So you said.” She felt the treacherous sympathy stirring, the same emotion she’d been forced to suppress two years ago. She’d done her job then because she’d had no choice. “That’s why we were forced to dismiss you. If you had come to the hearing and expressed remorse, said you had done it in the heat of the moment, we might have been able to suspend you for a while, then reinstate you. But you gave us no choice.” She dropped her eyes, knowing that what she said wasn’t true and not wanting him to see the shame in her eyes.

  “Are you telling me I should have lied? Should I have said I regretted what I’d done, that I was sorry?” Unwillingly she looked up, and thought she’d never seen such bitterness on a man’s face before, such hardness in a man’s eyes. “That bastard was already out of the hospital by the time you had my hearing. My wife and son were dead and in the ground. No, I wasn’t sorry I beat him nearly to death. I was only sorry I didn’t have a chance to finish the job.”

  “You know the rules about the handling of suspects as well as I do. You beat the man senseless in front of a dozen witnesses, for God’s sake. What did you expect us to do?” She recognized the pleading tone in her voice and clamped her mouth shut.

  He shuttered his gaze and the eyes that stared over at her were cold and lifeless. “I expected you to do exactly what you did. I was guilty of police brutality. I beat a man until his skull fractured and his ribs and arm broke. And the fact that he was an alderman’s son was just a bonus.”