Chloe's Secret

by Shelley K. Wall

  A nurse came in and put an IV in Mona’s arm, then tucked her covers around her legs. “You guys need to leave in thirty minutes. Miss Mona needs her rest,” the woman admonished before picking up her water pitcher and heading for the door.

  “I’ve had years of rest, dear. I’ll rest soon enough.”

  Colton registered the exchanged glance between his parents that told him more than he needed to know. The rest she spoke of wasn’t just a good night’s sleep. He swallowed the lump in his throat; it was all too highly emotional for his liking.

  “She’s right, Grams. We should leave.” He reached for Tess, but she hesitated.

  “There’s more you need to know and I’ll tell it. Sit down. See, the doctor that treated me that night told me that I might have trouble with children. I had no idea how important that was.”

  “Obviously, he was wrong.” Colton’s Dad piped in for the first time in a while.

  Mona squeezed his hand and smiled. “Thankfully, he was. But that was all he was wrong about. See, he never told anyone about it. Not even my Dad. He said it had to come from me and I didn’t want anyone to know. I was so ashamed. Robert and I decided that my Dad would probably finish the job Chloe had started if he knew so we never said a word. Thanks to the good doctor, we didn’t have to.”

  She closed her eyes and laid her head back for a minute, then started again. “The Lord works in mysterious ways, so I hear. And so I know. Greyson Tuggs had swelling of the brain from his injuries. Because he laid in the straw for a few hours before he was found, the delayed treatment left him with brain damage. He ended up in the state school a year later. Old Mr. Tuggs wanted Chloe to pay. He didn’t know about me. Since technically Chloe belonged to Robert’s family, he went to Judge Scorce’s and filed a suit against the stables asking for Chloe to be put down. He also tried to have Robert and his family run out of town.”

  James excused himself to go to the bathroom. Colton saw the shimmer in his eyes as he left the room and knew he just needed to get away and collect himself.

  “It’s not a pleasant story, is it? Well, the judge sided with the mayor and told Robert’s Dad to deliver Chloe to the stockyards where she’d be ‘disposed of’ properly. Robert refused to let them take her. He didn’t explain though. He’d promised me. They closed down the stables for a while, pending an investigation. Even as a kid, he was a man you could count on, one of integrity. Funny that it took such a horrible thing for the rest of the world to see what I already knew. He brought her to my house and I hid her in the barn at an abandoned house near me. One of the neighbors saw me though and the judge made me bring her in.”

  “Fortunate for her, the flood happened then and Chloe did what she had always done—she saved the lives around her. She pulled so many people out of those flood waters, I was sure the mayor would pardon her. He did. Turned her over to me.”

  “It was over, then.” Tess patted her on the arm. “That’s a great story.”

  Mona shook her head slowly. “No, old Mr. Tuggs wasn’t about to let it be over. The horse had permanently disabled his boy, and he wanted vengeance. Not just with her, but Robert’s family too. One night, I was in the barn combing her down and I heard whistling outside. It was Tuggs. He’d driven out to our house in his old pickup with a shotgun laid out on the seat beside him.”

  James returned. Colton hardly noticed because he had edged up against Tess’ shoulder and concentrated on Gram’s words as much as the others. “Did Tuggs try to shoot Chloe?” Colton asked.

  “He stayed out there in the dark and whistled for a while, waiting for me to leave. In the meantime, the good doctor came by to drop off some medicine my father needed and saw him. The doc conversed with the good mayor and Tuggs hightailed it home and never came back.”

  “That’s surprising.”

  “Yeah, I thought so too, until Tuggs Senior had the city issue a contract to my dad for carriage services.”

  “No kidding?” Colton’s dad chimed in. “Why did he suddenly change his tune?”

  “That’s the good part. Mr. Tuggs came to see me several months later and delivered a package. It’s in the buffet drawer in the dining room at home; take a look if you want. I’ve never opened it. But what he said was right. It was enough justice for me. It took my need to shoot Tuggs Junior’s balls off completely away. He said that Doc came by to see him and explained Chloe’s ‘situation’ and that he didn’t see any reason for her or me to suffer any more than we already had. He said he was ashamed his family had caused us pain and that he’d make sure neither of us suffered again at their hands. Until then, I’d hated the man and his son. I saw the pain in his eyes and I knew he’d seen the evil in his boy before. He’d known the boy was wrong, but hadn’t known what to do about it. What parent would be prepared for such a thing?”

  “So, the carriages are the result of that?”

  She looked straight into her son’s eyes, hard and long. “Before he left me that night he said that justice had been done and things had been made right. He realized it after speaking with the doc and he wanted me to know. Then he left and I never spoke with Mr. Tuggs again. It was too painful for both of us.”

  James cleared his throat and spoke, “Mom, you know Dad tells it different.”

  She caressed a picture next to the bed. One I hadn’t noticed before—of a young stable boy holding a horse. It must have been Chloe, a female version of Bullwhip. The young black man had his lips to her muzzle. “Well, that’s just rambling, honey.”

  “He went back, Mom. He never told you, but he told me when I was twelve. He said that Chloe knocked Tuggs out, but that wasn’t what messed him up.”

  Mona focused on the picture. “Your father was with me the rest of the night, honey. I told them then and I say it now. He never left my side. The doc said the same.”

  Colton’s fingers burned from the vice grip Tess had on him. He swallowed hard. She darted glances from the picture, to Grams, and then to him. He realized she’d never seen him. Never known his grandfather.

  Mona sighed. “I’m glad you brought this picture—it was my favorite of him. Of both of them.”

  Colton’s dad coughed. “I remember, Mom. He told me that sometimes a man has to decide exactly where his place in the world is—and not let anyone take it away. He said just because someone is important, doesn’t mean they’re good or more deserving. He took a tire iron to Greyson, made sure that he’d never hurt another woman. He kept the damn thing all those years in the barn, said he figured they’d come get him at some point. But they never did and for some reason he wanted me to know. He showed it to me and said that if I don’t have the courage to do right when right was needed, then I can’t expect others to either. He said he told the doc everything and when the mayor showed up, he was sure it was over. Only it wasn’t. The doc came to see him later, and told him that the way he remembered it was different. According to his memory, Chloe had kicked the crap out of Tuggs and Robert had saved you.”

  She traced her hand over the young man’s face. “Even then he was the most beautiful man—inside and out. And if it hadn’t been for Chloe, and her strength and sacrifice, I might have lost him.”

  Colton stared at Tess’ hand. Somewhere during the length of that story she had loosened her grip and he felt the warmth of her at his side. His father stood there with anguish in his eyes, a man who’d nearly cried at the pain his mother had endured. His mother had sat silently through the entire story avoiding any contact at all. Her reaction seemed odd—and cold.

  “You should have told your mother, Mona.” Sadie’s voice was thin.

  “I should have done a lot of things, but I thought my parents would be ashamed of me at first, then later I thought they’d be ashamed of themselves. Mostly, I was afraid for Robert. No one would have understood my feelings for him. It was the fifties, and sure, things had changed, but people were still blind. Besides, there was no reason for my parents to carry the same guilt I had. It was bad enough that Robert had
to share it. He never laid a hand on anyone in his life other than that day.”

  Mona leveled her gaze to Sadie’s. “Though there was one other time he had wanted to.”

  Sadie shrugged and kept her focus out the window of the room.

  Mona smiled at Colton, then the others. “So, now you know why the horses mean so much. The day that she saved me, that she kicked Greyson, I begged and pleaded for her to help. I didn’t know she was going to save both of us—all of us really. And when she had her first foal, I promised her I would take care of her family just as she had taken care of mine.” Mona chuckled. “Of course she had four babies to my one so my job lasted a bit longer.”

  “Yeah, like the rest of your life,” James added.

  Mona sucked in a deep breath, then settled down into the bed. “Hers too. Don’t forget that. Everything that happened in my life was due to Chloe and Robert. I owe them—everything. And so do you, all of you. Goliad’s the last of her babies, and I don’t think I can keep my end of the bargain. You’re going to have to do it for me. Now, you all need to leave. This old woman is tired.”

  She turned her head and closed her eyes. Colton blinked in awe, then turned to Tess. “You knew about this? She told you?”

  “No, I knew Chloe had saved her, that’s all.”

  Colton looked at his parents, both huddled in separate corners of the room. “You still want to sell the horses?”

  “We had already decided—” His mother spoke but Colton ignored her. As far as he was concerned she had no part at all.

  “You decided, not me. Let’s go, Tess. Your lunch hour was over a long time ago. I’m sorry about all this.”

  Tess stood and gave him a look that hurt his insides.

  Chapter 24

  I knew there was mascara running down my cheeks. Colton’s expression made it clear I was haggard. I supposed I deserved it. She had told a story I was completely unprepared for and I had urged her to do so.

  Words couldn’t touch the mountain of emotions that rose in the pit of my stomach. I was sick. Mona had spent years burying the incident. Incident. What a trivialized way to say rape, a not-ugly-enough word for the vilest of actions. She had been brutalized at fifteen, a time when girls should be dreaming of kisses and handholding. It had obviously scarred her permanently, yet she’d dealt with it in the best way she knew. She felt that this despicable young man had seen justice.

  In some sick way, there had been justice. Personally, I thought the punishment should have been just as vile as the action—a certain type of dismemberment came to mind. I imagined that she took comfort in the knowledge that young Scruggs would never harm another girl. I, however, wished that Chloe had dealt her debilitating blow before rather than after Mona’s life was changed.

  Colton hadn’t said a word from the time we left the hospital and hailed a cab to the moment we stopped at my building. How could he? I had railroaded his grandmother into exposing the most painful memory of her life. What had I been thinking?

  I wasn’t thinking, and that was the problem. If I dug deep enough, it was a purely selfish act. I had wanted to out her so that her family could understand her love for another woman. Only, it hadn’t been a woman, but a horse. There was nothing about it that was controversial, but rather more heroic than I could have imagined. My actions, on the other hand, had been shameful at best. I couldn’t face Colton as I exited the cab and cowered back to my office.

  If Mr. Conners had stepped in to chastise my tardiness, I probably would have crumbled into tears. Fortunately, he had left—probably to my mother’s house, which was another drama I had run away from. The clarity of it all hit me like a brick. I was the worst of hypocrites, I was more than ready to force Mona to expose her demons, but I had run away from mine like a scared child.

  Something had to change and fast. I just wasn’t sure how, or even where to start. So after dinner that night, I did what I usually resorted to when things overwhelmed me, I made a list:

  Want:

  Motorcycle fixed

  Make more money

  Better job?

  Keep my condo

  Help Mona

  Colton?

  The only thing I wasn’t sure about was how to address the list—and what that last line actually meant.

  I was awakened by a loud banging on the door and lifted my head from the kitchen counter. Apparently I’d fallen asleep. I wiped the drool from my mouth and transferred it to my hip before peeking through the door.

  Colton.

  It was ten-fifteen. I turned and leaned against the door for a second trying to decide whether I should answer or not.

  “Tess, it’s me. We need to talk. Can you open up? Please.”

  Well, he did say please—I unlatched the lock and opened it slowly, “Is something wrong? Mona?”

  He shook his head. “No, she’s fine.” He stepped through the door and straight into me. I still felt uncomfortable about what I had done and couldn’t face him. I stepped back so he could enter, which he did. He strode straight into my kitchen and sat.

  Right in front of my list.

  I grabbed it and slipped it into a drawer, but not before he had managed a quick glance.

  “You can cross that first one off.” He pointed to the place the list had been. “It’s out front, if you open the garage I’ll bring it in.”

  “You have Dad’s motorcycle?”

  He put his hands on the counter and thrummed them up and down, “I brought it to you. It’s been repaired.”

  “By whom?”

  He picked an imaginary piece of dirt from his fingernail. “I don’t know. I’m just the delivery guy.”

  “So, that’s why you’re here? That’s what we needed to talk about?”

  “Tess.” He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it rumpled and completely—sexy. The same look he had had when I left his apartment.

  “Hmmm?”

  “I’m not sure how to ask this.”

  “Just speak.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me about Grams?”

  There it was. The very thing that I had feared from the beginning sat between us like a boulder. I wasn’t sure how to respond. I thought for a couple seconds.

  “I didn’t think I should. Then, when I knew you better, I tried to, but you laughed. So I thought, well, it was her story—not mine. She told me at a time when she thought I was a random stranger . . . and I obviously had it all wrong anyway. I didn’t know about the—” I turned away because I still couldn’t say the word. It was too ugly to associate to someone I knew, someone as nice and kind as Mona.

  “Rape.” His voice was cold and stark.

  “Yes.”

  He stood and put his hands in his pockets, pacing to the window and back. “You kept it all from me, even after—”

  I stopped him then. “No! She had only told me that Chloe kicked a guy that tried to hurt her, she did not tell me the rest. I didn’t know about the— Geez, I can’t even say it.”

  He stood with his back to me, gazing through the dark glass of the window at nothing.

  “I’m sorry,” I continued. “I had no idea, I would have told you if I had.”

  He turned. “Would you?”

  “Of course. You know that, don’t you?”

  “No, not really. The truth is I have no idea what you would or wouldn’t do. I don’t even really know who you are. That’s the problem.”

  “I see.” He didn’t trust me. I wanted to touch him, to pull him close. All I could think about was the night we had spent together, but my hands were still, I couldn’t move.

  He watched me then, as if he was trying to read my expression. “That’s why we need to talk.”

  “Colton, I have told you everything I know. There’s nothing else I can say. Whatever you want from me, I can’t give you anything else.”

  His jaw ticked. “I wasn’t talking about Grams. I was— I wanted . . . I thought we should take a few steps backward.”

  My heart sank.
I knew what that meant. Not backward, but over and out. We were done.

  “Backward. Okay. We can do that. It’s late, Colton. You’ve said what you wanted to say. I think we can call it quits now.” I walked to the door. I had never been one for drama and I didn’t want to make a scene, but it really was late. And if he had meant to say what I thought he did, then all that was left to do was leave. I turned the knob on the door and slid it open, thinking he’d walk out.

  He didn’t.

  We were at a crossroad apparently. Me holding the door open for him to leave and him standing across the room, not moving. Our eyes were locked and for the life of me, I had no idea what he wanted. We stood in silence.

  “Do you drink coffee, Tess?” he asked.

  “Huh?”

  “Coffee, I could use a cup. This family brought in their dog tonight and I had to put it down. I hate doing that. Especially when they have young kids.”

  I clicked the door softly closed. “Sure, coffee.” I padded across the floor in my socks, passing him on the way.

  He followed so close that I could smell him. Then as I filled the pot with water, he ran a finger down my spine. “You don’t have any pets.”

  “I had a dog, a dachshund. She died last April.”

  “What happened?”

  “She was old.”

  “You didn’t want another one?”

  “I wanted to wait until I had better work hours, I guess. It’s not fair to leave one alone all the time. Why are you asking?”

  “I don’t know. I spend most of my day around animals. I was just curious. This family tonight, they told me stories about their dog. And after listening to them, I realized that their tie to that mutt was pretty much like the one my family has with the horses.”