Ready To Love Again

by Annalyse Knight

  When they were on their way, Chase reached over and took her hand out of her lap, brought it to his lips, and settled it on his leg. She couldn’t help but sigh with contentment at the beautiful scenery while they drove into Pacific Grove. The excited voices of the boys reliving Shawn’s play floated all around them while her thumb idly stroked the back of Chase’s hand. She was crazy about him, and nothing was going to ruin their day together.

  Chapter 12

  Katie had driven through the upper part of Pacific Grove many times since it was the fastest way to get to the aquarium, but she had only visited downtown and the oceanfront a handful of times. When they came down the hill of Skyline Forest, drawing closer to downtown, there was a spectacular view of the Monterey Bay. Victorian homes in a variety of pastel colors lined the streets while they neared the ocean. Most of the streets were blocked off around downtown where the Good Old Days fair was going on, so parking was limited. Chase had to take several back roads that wound them down to Oceanview Boulevard before he found a parking spot.

  Katie sucked in a breath at the beauty that lay before her. It was a clear afternoon, and the bay was a brilliant shade of navy blue and glassy smooth. The beach at Lovers Point was dotted with sunbathers enjoying the warmth of the perfect spring day.

  “We’ll have to walk a couple of blocks up, but I thought it would be nice.” Chase smiled at Katie and squeezed her hand when he helped her out of the car.

  Katie closed her eyes and inhaled the crisp smell of the ocean. When she opened her eyes, she took in the bright-pink flowers blooming on the ice plant that blanketed the landscape along the cliff’s edge and bike trail.

  They strolled along the bike trail before cutting up the hill toward the activities, Shawn and Tony taking turns holding Buddy’s leash. They made a quick stop for hot dogs to feed the ravenous boys and then continued on their way up another two blocks to where the motorcycle competition would be held.

  The street was blocked off, and orange cones were positioned in strategic places up and down three blocks of the four-lane residential road. The crowds were thick, people jockeying for the best place to watch the competition. Chase gripped her hand tighter and weaved in and out of the throng until he found a spot on a stone wall in front of the elementary school. As soon as they were situated, Chase’s phone rang.

  While Chase spoke to his sister to let her know where they were, Katie’s eyes wandered over to Shawn and Tony to make sure they were still on the grassy hill. She laughed when she saw that they were using Buddy as a pillow while they pointed out the different birds that chirped in the tree under which they were lying.

  “Katie!” Daniel called as he, Gina, and Liz walked up and leaned against the wall. “Shawn did amazing today.”

  She smiled and nodded. “Thank you. He was pretty excited about that last play.”

  “As he should be,” Gina said, hopping up on the wall next to Katie. “This is so much fun. I love all the motorcycles.”

  Motorcycle police from all over California lined the street. The competition kicked off with several drill teams that rode in a thrilling choreographed dance. It was exhilarating to watch while the bikes zipped around each other, coming closer to colliding with every dangerous turn. An announcer spoke of the history of the event but was drowned out by the roar of thirty police motorcycles rumbling in harmony.

  After the drill teams performed, the synchronized competition began. Katie was enthralled with the way the two motorcycle officers weaved around the orange cones in unison. The sound of their scraping foot pegs when they dipped their bikes low to make it around the cones echoed through the streets.

  She was so wrapped up in the show that she didn’t notice Buddy until he put his front paws on her knees, his leash trailing behind him. Her head snapped over to the grass to see why the boys weren’t holding on to him.

  They weren’t there.

  Katie grabbed Buddy’s leash before he could run away and turned to Chase. “Where are the boys?”

  A lump formed in her throat the moment the words left her mouth. Chase looked over his shoulder and scanned the crowd on the sidewalk. His hand raked through his hair, and Katie could see the alarm in his eyes.

  “Gina, the boys?” Katie asked, her panic starting to rise.

  Gina looked around, and Chase and Katie hopped down from the wall. A loud roar of approval erupted from the audience, and Katie wanted to scream at everyone to stop cheering and find her kids. She stood on her tiptoes and looked around while Chase jumped onto the stone wall and scanned the crowd from above everyone’s heads.

  “Chase?” Katie asked when the tears started to prickle behind her lids. “Do you see them?”

  Chase shook his head and jumped down from the wall. Bile rose in her throat.

  “Daniel. Gina. You take the other side of the street. Katie, take Liz and see if they wandered into the crowd by the announcers booth. If not, check the school. I’m going to the police station.” He turned to Katie and grasped her arms. “It’ll be okay.”

  She nodded before she shoved him away. “Go,” she said, then turned to Liz. “Come on, Liz. We need to find the boys.”

  Liz had a worried frown on her face when Katie took her hand and walked down the street with Buddy. When they didn’t find them on the sidewalk, Katie turned back to the school and checked the playground. It wouldn’t have surprised her if the boys got distracted and were on the jungle gym. Once she was close enough to see the children who were playing there, she realized that none of them were hers.

  Liz wrenched her hand from Katie’s grasp and gave her an angry scowl.

  “Liz. What’s—”

  “You lost my brother!” A few of the children on the playground stopped and stared. “And you want to be my mom? You can’t even keep track of two little boys. You will never be my mom. My dad won’t ever love you like he loved my mom.”

  Liz stomped her foot and her face turned a bright shade of red. Stunned at the venom in her voice, Katie snapped out of her disbelief when she realized Liz’s temper tantrum wasn’t helping the situation. She’d figure out how to deal with Liz’s rage after they found the boys.

  “Liz, please. Let’s find Tony and Shawn, and then we can talk about this.” Katie reached for her hand, but Liz jerked away and narrowed her eyes.

  “Don’t touch me.”

  Liz turned away from her, and that’s when Katie’s patience reached its limit.

  “Damn it, get back here.” Katie walked in front of her to block her escape. “Look, I know you’re mad and you don’t like me right now, but this isn’t the time for your hateful attitude.” Liz looked surprised that Katie had snapped at her, but it was imperative they work together to find the boys. “We need to find your brother and Shawn before something happens to them. So you can either help look, or we can go find your father. The choice is yours, but I’m not going to stand around and let you slow things down.”

  Liz looked somewhat remorseful after Katie’s scolding, but she gave Katie a curt nod and followed her with a quick step through the school and up the crowded sidewalks. Katie spotted Daniel and Gina walking toward the police station, so she grabbed Liz’s hand despite her protest and pulled her quickly across the street toward the police station.

  “Did you find the boys?” Katie asked, dropping Liz’s hand and trying to keep the panic to a minimum. Daniel shook his head. Gina looked as distraught as Katie felt when she pushed by them and ran up the stairs into the police station.

  “Liz and I will stay out here in case they’re wandering around,” Daniel said.

  Katie nodded and turned to follow Gina. As soon as the doors swung open, she saw Tony and Shawn sitting along the wall in plastic chairs. She let out a relieved breath and sank to the floor in front of Shawn before she let go of Buddy’s leash. She pulled her son into her arms, burying her face in his hair. Gina and Chase spoke in hushed whispers by the front desk while Katie tried to hold in her sobs of relief.

  “Where were
you? We looked everywhere.” Tears began to flow down Katie’s cheeks. “I was so worried about you.” His arm curled up into her hair, and he petted her like he would the dog.

  “I’m sorry, Mom. Buddy ran off, and we went to look for him,” Shawn explained.

  Katie continued to cry until she felt Chase kneel behind her and wrap his strong arms around them both.

  “It’s okay, sweetheart,” Chase whispered in her ear. “They’re okay.”

  Katie pulled back from Shawn and let her head fall to Chase’s chest while she looked down her nose at her son. Shawn looked up at her through his thick black lashes, and she shuddered when visions of what could have happened ran through her mind. She wiped her tears on her sleeve and helped him stand up before allowing Chase to drag her to her feet.

  As soon as her heart had slowed to a normal pace and she realized the boys were unhurt, her anger started to boil at the carelessness of their actions. Chase must have felt the change in her mood, because he took her hand and rubbed soothing circles across her knuckles.

  Count to ten, Katie.

  “Please, tell me exactly what happened,” she said, proud that her words didn’t come out at a louder volume.

  “Well, see, Buddy ran off through the school, so Tony and me went to find him.” Shawn looked down at his feet. With the way he avoided eye contact, it was obvious that he knew she was angry. “He disappeared when we made it around the building, so we kept calling him, but he never came. We came back to the wall, but you were all gone.” He whispered the last sentence, and when he looked back up at Katie, there were tears glistening in his eyes. “I was so scared, Mom.” Katie’s heart softened at his admission, and she wanted to pull him back into her arms.

  Tony laid a hand on his friend’s arm and looked at Katie with remorse. “Dad always told me that if I get lost to find someone in uniform and tell them. There were lots of police around, so we went up to one of them, and he brought us here.”

  Katie grabbed on to Tony’s hand and pulled him to her, giving him a fierce hug. “Well, I suppose if you were going to get lost, then this would be the best place.”

  Chase and Gina chuckled beside her while Katie took another steadying breath and released Tony. Chase held out his hand for her to take. “Let’s go try to enjoy the rest of the afternoon.”

  When they exited, Daniel’s head perked up and a wide grin stole across his face as soon as he saw Tony and Shawn. Liz also looked relieved and launched herself into Chase’s arms. He let go of Katie’s hand and hugged her to him.

  “It’s okay, Liz. Tony’s fine.” He pulled away from her and brought her face up so she could look in his eyes. “What have I told you to do if you get lost?”

  “Find someone in uniform. If it’s a store, then find someone who works there. If it’s a place like this, then find a policeman or fireman,” Liz recited before he pulled her back into another hug.

  “Good. I just wanted to make sure. That’s what Tony and Shawn did, and they’re fine.”

  She nodded and looked over at Katie then gave her a small smile. Katie wasn’t sure if it was Liz’s way of apologizing or if she was smiling because she had accomplished breaking Chase’s physical contact with her. She didn’t want to think of Liz doing something so vindictive, but she had witnessed a side of Liz she never wanted to see again. Chase tucked Liz under his arm and took Katie’s hand, leading them back into the crowd to watch the show.

  Tony and Shawn had a great time watching all the near misses while the drill team performed for a final time. At the end, the boys jumped up and down in pure delight when one of the officers stood on the seat of his bike and rode the full length of the block without using his hands.

  Liz kept her distance when the competition ended, and they moved through the vendor fair. She wasn’t rude, but Katie knew their relationship had changed. She debated whether she should say something to Chase and remembered the last time she hadn’t. He had told her he wanted her to be open with him when it came to Liz, but she was afraid that if she was, it would drive more of a wedge between her and his daughter.

  Katie kept her concerns to herself while they drove to Chase’s house. If she was going to say something, she needed to wait until they were alone to bring it up. The boys fed Buddy on the patio before they ran up to Tony’s room to play with the new rubber band guns they bought at the street fair. Liz made a hasty retreat to her room. With her continued silence and avoidance tactics, Katie realized she had no choice but to bring their argument to Chase’s attention. She waited until they were preparing dinner to tell him.

  “Chase?”

  “Hmmm?” He turned to cut vegetables for a salad.

  “Liz and I had a confrontation.”

  Chase stopped slicing the cucumber and looked up with a frown. “What kind of confrontation?”

  “When we were looking for the boys, she was pretty upset about Tony disappearing, so I’m sure that’s all it was,” Katie explained.

  “What did she say?”

  Katie could tell by the tone of his voice that he was worried. “Well, she accused me of losing Tony.”

  “That wasn’t your fault. I should have been watching them, too.” He laid the knife down and slid his fingers through the belt loops of her jeans.

  She nodded. “I know. I think she was just upset, and I was an easy target.”

  “I can tell she said something else. What was it?”

  “Um . . . she’s―” Katie paused and looked him in the eyes. She didn’t want him to get upset, but she knew she couldn’t prevent it. “She told me she didn’t want me to be her mom.”

  Anger flashed in his eyes, but in a heartbeat, it was gone. He leaned into Katie and rested his forehead on her shoulder.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

  Katie shook her head and pulled his face up to hers. “You don’t have anything to be sorry about. She’s having a hard time with the thought of her daddy spending time with someone besides her mom. It’s okay. It’s to be expected.”

  Chase pulled her against him, and his warm breath at her ear sent goose bumps down her arm.

  “I know. I’ll talk to her.”

  Determined not to let him distract her, she continued. “Losing a parent is hard on a child. Even though Victor didn’t die, the separation from his father made it hard for Shawn to adjust. He didn’t lash out like Liz, but my extremely confident child cried himself to sleep every night and acted out constantly to get attention. Now that I look back on it, Victor was probably focused on his relationship with his girlfriend, because he wasn’t around much. Shawn was in trouble at school on a daily basis, and the therapist thought it was because he was trying to get his father to communicate with him.”

  “Mm-hmm, I’ll straighten things out with Liz tomorrow.” Chase’s lips ran over her ear, pulling it between his lips and sucking.

  “Chase, please don’t be angry with her. I already laid into her because I was frantic with worry over the boys. If anything, I should apologize to her.”

  “No apologies. It wasn’t your fault. We’ll take care of it later,” he said against her ear, accomplishing his goal of distracting her.

  She ran her fingers through his hair and pulled him closer while his lips made lazy patterns across her neck and along her jaw until he reached her chin. Katie tugged his hair until their lips met. She had wanted this all day. The soft kisses and stolen moments were not enough to quench the thirst that had built for him throughout the day.

  Chase’s hand came up and rested on her cheek, while his thumb pushed down on her chin, silently asking her to open to him. She responded, and his tongue slipped between her parted lips. Any thoughts she had about kid drama flew away with her restraint when he pushed her up against the counter. Katie’s heart rate increased, and her hands traveled down his back and into the pockets of his jeans.

  “What’s for din—” Tony’s voice wafted through the kitchen, and Chase broke the kiss and lowered his head to Katie’s shoulder wit
h a groan. She giggled at his reaction and turned to the boys, who were looking a little stunned yet happy.

  “Tortellini with white sauce, salad, and bread sticks.”

  Shawn expressed his approval as he let Buddy in, and they darted back out of the kitchen. Chase trailed kisses back up her neck once they were gone.

  “Stay with me tonight,” he whispered. There was no mistaking his intent. Katie wanted to, but she didn’t want to make things worse with Liz, so she shook her head with regret.

  “I shouldn’t. You need to talk to Liz first.”

  Chase nodded against her neck. “You’re right,” he said, but that didn’t stop him from laying openmouthed kisses across her neck.

  Katie laughed, then pushed him away. “If you keep that up, I might change my mind.” Grabbing the spoon off the counter, she turned back to the stove. His arms wrapped around her waist, and he rested his chin on her shoulder.

  “Soon,” he whispered, kissing her cheek before going back to chopping the vegetables.

  They didn’t have any more incidents with Liz for the rest of the evening. She came down for dinner and even participated in conversation with the boys about the upcoming May Festival at their school.

  It was early when Chase and his kids drove them home. He walked her to the door and took her in his arms after Shawn and Buddy disappeared into the house.

  “Saturday, you’re mine,” he said.

  “Please tell me what we’re doing next weekend.” His mouth pressed under her ear, and she pushed him away so she could think. “Gina told me to pack a bag, so I’m assuming our date is overnight?” Katie was a bit apprehensive about spending the night with him, but her underlying desire pushed those feelings from her mind.

  Chase smiled down at her and nodded. “It’s a surprise,” he said. Katie growled low in her chest, and he chuckled before giving her a chaste kiss. “Trust me—you don’t want to ruin this surprise.”

  Chase gave her a lopsided smile before he released her and jogged back to his car.