For Nicky

by A. D. Ellis

  Nate called me Monday and asked if I could grab dinner with him that night. I tried not to let him hear me smiling ear to ear when I said yes, but I’m guessing he could sense I was definitely excited. A date! With Nathan Morgan. Honestly, I’m having a little bit of a hard time getting over the fact that he’s had sex with Audrey, but I push that thought aside and ask him what I should dress for. Nate asks if I’m up for burgers, fries, and shakes and I readily agree—YUM! Who wouldn’t be up for that?

  Monday, after work, I practically skipped home to get ready for my date. It’s an unusually warm fall day so I decide to wear my discarded skirt/shirt/boots ensemble from the party at the center. Luckily, I had shaved my legs that morning; I jumped in the shower to wash quickly then spent the rest of the time redoing my hair and makeup. Nate had said he’d be out of basketball practice by 5:30. Why does thinking of him as Coach Morgan make me smile so big? Anyway, he said he’d run home to shower and change, and be over to my place by 6:15. It was 6:00 so I had some time to kill. I settled into the couch with a book to pass the time.

  When Nate knocked on my door thirteen minutes later, I was all giddy and literally bounced up and down before heading to the door. When I opened the door, Nate was standing there with a heart-stopping smile wearing a perfect pair of jeans and a fitted black t-shirt with some awesome tennis shoes. I don’t know much about guys’ shoes, but I got the feeling that Nate was a shoe guy. He looked me up and down and smiled when he said, “Dang, Libby, you look fabulous! Are you ready or do you want to hang out before dinner?” I decided, since he was here, he could get the 30 second tour of my apartment. I showed him around and Nate made appropriate comments and asked questions to show he was interested in what I said. By the time we reached the living room again, Nate had grabbed my hand.

  “Libby, I know things need to move slowly, and I’m more than ok with that. I’ve never been in this situation, so I’m no expert, but I want this to go right. So, you let me know if I’m moving too fast, but I was really hoping I could kiss you before we head to dinner?”

  Um, yes, please. Nate, pulling me closer to him with the hand he was holding, used his thumb to trace my lips then let his hand slip behind my head and lowered his lips to mine. The first 1.2 seconds of the kiss was sweet, but it quickly heated up and I felt myself warming from head to toe and specific points in between. Nate turned us and walked me three steps backwards so that I was leaned up against the door. He broke the kiss, “Libby, in the past, I would have skipped dinner and taken you to bed. That’s what I’m really wanting to do. But, the problem with that plan is that I probably wouldn’t have had anything to do with you after the fact, and I definitely don’t want that. I want to spend time with you. So, I’m going to kiss you once more, then we’re getting out of here so I can take you to dinner.”

  Nate lowered his mouth to mine again. By the time we broke apart this time, we were both breathing heavily and I was seriously thinking about choosing the skip dinner option. However, we calmed our beating hearts and walked hand-in-hand to his Jeep. Nate opened the door for me and gave me a sweet, chaste kiss before shutting the door.

  I loved riding in Nate’s Jeep. He was shocked when I told him I wanted him to leave the top off. The wind in my hair is one of my favorite things! The little drive-in that he took us to was awesome. I loved sitting in Nate’s Jeep eating burgers and fries and sipping my vanilla shake. We could have gone in to eat, but this just seemed more quaint and intimate. We talked about a vast variety of topics again. Favorite foods, books, movies, vacations, etc. Nate and I both liked Mexican and pizza, I mean, who doesn’t!?! Nate wasn’t much of a reader, but he promised he’d read anything I suggested to him; he said he trusted my professional opinion. Nate was a big fan of comedy movies so we had another thing in common with that, although I liked romantic comedies a little more than he did. I had never really been on a real vacation; we moved a lot but never took vacations. I did remember once, before Mom died, that we went to a little theme park and Audrey and I got to ride the rides. If I remember correctly, Audrey threw a fit because she said I was getting to have more fun than she was. I think Dad bought us lunch at a place where Audrey chose to eat and we left soon after that. Nate looked at me sadly. “I promise, one day, you and I will go on a special vacation just the two of us to wherever YOU choose to go, Libby!” He seemed a little taken aback at himself for promising something like that, and I was surprised, too, honestly, but I liked the thought of us going on a trip together. Nate said he loved the trips that his parents had taken them on to Chicago and Florida. He said he’d always heard of Gatlinburg, TN being a fun place, but he’d never been. I told him that Gatlinburg seemed like a good choice for our future trip. Nate smiled and leaned over close to me. “You’ve got milkshake right here,” he said as he lowered his head to mine. His warm lips touched mine and his tongue darted out to lick vanilla off my lip. Mmmm, he tasted like chocolate and fries and smelled like, well, like Nate. Perfect.

  Nate and I both had to work the next day so we decided that dinner was all we had time for. We drove slowly back to my place, my hair flying around in the breeze since the top was still down. When we pulled up to my apartment, Nate held my hand as he walked me to the door. I wasn’t sure if I should invite him in or not. On one hand, I really wanted to. On the other hand, I knew I had work in the morning and I wasn’t exactly sure how far I was ready for things to go with him. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely like Nate and want to spend more time with him and I could see a physical relationship with him developing rather quickly. However, we’ve not been dating for long, if that’s even what you could call it, and I don’t want to jump right into bed with him. Well, I WANT to, but I’m not sure it’s a good decision. Also, I keep thinking of him with Audrey and that sort of makes me shudder. It’s not like he had sex with her knowing he would later date me, so I don’t fault him. I just worry that there will be comparisons, and I won’t live up. Plus, it’s just sort of grossing me out to know he slept with her before me. Like I’m getting her sloppy seconds. Oh, but, after kisses with Nate, I’m so looking forward to sleeping with him. I feel like I got cheated with Austin, and I have a feeling Nate will make it up to me in ways I can’t even imagine.

  All of this ran through my mind in about 20 seconds before Nate and I reached my door. “Libby-girl, I want more than anything for you to invite me in…..you have no idea how badly I want that…..but I’m thinking we should stick to some kisses out here because if I go inside with you, I’m not going to want to stop at kisses. This is totally crazy to hear these words come out of my mouth, but I’m thinking we should keep it slow for now and not rush anything. I’ve never been a take it slow type guy, but that’s what feels right with us. For now. Are you ok with that?” Nate looked a little embarrassed after his little speech, and he ducked his head slightly and looked at me from questioning eyes.

  “Nate, a huge part of me wants to invite you in and let things happen as they may. But, the other part of me thinks that this would be too soon. I want more than a few dates with you. I worry a little that if things get physical between us now, you’ll run away. It’s sort of your M.O. from what you’ve told me. So, let’s stick to kisses out here for now. But, there’s no reason to skimp on those.”

  Nate smiled a dazzling smile at me and hugged me to his body. “Libby-girl, I don’t plan on running, ok? But, let’s take it slow anyway. I think sex after a couple times of seeing each other is quite a bit soon for what I’m hoping we become.”

  I looked up at Nate’s gorgeous face and watched as his eyes went from sparkling and dancing to dark and hot. His mouth came down on mine, tentatively at first, then with more intensity. My arms came up around his neck and he walked me back against the door before settling one leg between mine. I could very quickly get used to him pushing me up against walls and doors! His lips were hot and smooth, his tongue flicking out to dance across my lips. I opened my mouth slightly, just enough for his tongue to sweep inside and find mi
ne. I felt a rumble in Nate’s chest as our tongues glided against each other. His hands settled on my waist and started to roam up under my shirt. His hands on the small of my back felt like fire to the touch. I broke the kiss to catch my breath and Nate took advantage of that to nuzzle under my chin and start kissing my neck. Little kisses and nibbles and his tongue on my earlobe were about more than I could handle. I knew I was getting wet and I felt the need to grind myself against his leg. When we both moaned, it was enough to break the spell. Nate backed up, looking sexy and winded. “Libby, I better go. I’m thinking a cold shower before bed is in store for me. Listen, I’ll text you before bed. Let’s make plans for this weekend, ok?” Nate retreated down the stairs and sat in the Jeep until he knew I was safe inside my door. I watched from the window as he waved and drove away. It was comforting to know that I wasn’t the only one wearing a goofy grin on my face.

  Chapter 34

  NATE

  Me: Hey, Libby-girl! You all ready for bed?

  Libby: Yep! How about you? How was the cold shower? :)

  Me: It was cold! So, what are you wearing? :)

  Libby: Seriously? :) Ok, I’m wearing a pair of boxer shorts and a tank top. Totally not sexy!

  Me: Libby, you’d be sexy in a brown paper sack. I’m going to take that image to bed with me.

  Libby: The tank and shorts I hope, not the sack! Wait, if you get to take an image to bed, I should get to as well! What are you wearing?

  Me: Um, nothing. I usually don’t wear anything to bed unless Nicky is here for the night.

  Libby: Oh. Well. Wow. Ok, that’s quite the image I’m taking to bed! I want to sleep RIGHT NOW! Night, Nate! :)

  Me: Sleep, sweet Libby! I’ll talk to you tomorrow about weekend plans. Sweet dreams!

  My brain couldn’t get over the image of Libby in short little boxers and a tank top. I bet the tank top is tight in all the right places. I imagine she doesn’t have a bra on and I can see the outline of her nipples. Shit, I think I may need another shower.

  Luckily, I fell asleep without needing the shower. I definitely had some nice dreams about Libby throughout the night. I felt like a teenager waking up from a wet dream with morning wood that could have pounded nails. I decided a little one-on-one with Maverick was in order so that I could get this problem to go away and still take a nice warm shower. The warm water and slick soap along with my hand wasn’t nearly enough to completely satisfy Maverick, but it was all he was getting for the time being. I couldn’t believe it, but I didn’t want to have sex with Libby. No, wait, that’s not actually true. I wanted to have sex with Libby something fierce. However, I wanted to see where this thing with us could go and I worried that having sex with her now would mess things up. I felt a little nauseous and light headed when the word “relationship” came into my head, but I guess that’s what I was hoping to have with Libby. I had no clue how to have a relationship, but I planned on trying to do my best. Maybe I should talk to my dad or my uncle, they both have long term successful marriages. Yeah, I’ll talk to them both today. Maybe we can even all three catch lunch together. I think my dad has an early release day at school and Uncle Dale could usually take lunch whenever. I texted both men about meeting for lunch then I texted Libby about the weekend.

  Me: Good morning! Did you sleep well? I sure did! I had some awesome dreams about boxers and tank tops! :)

  Libby: Hmmmm, I’d say my dreams were awesome as well! :)

  Me: So, you want to go out this weekend? Make a whole day of it? I was thinking a morning run, shower and change, then I could pick you up and we could maybe try bowling? Then dinner and a movie? Whatcha think?

  Libby: That sounds awesome! How about 10am run? Track or park?

  Me: Let’s do park, I get bored on the track sometimes. I’ll meet you there at 10 then. Can’t wait to see you, Libby!

  Libby: I’m already looking forward to it! Bye, Nate! :)

  Chapter 35

  Nate

  My dad and uncle are twins. So I guess Nicky and I being twins wasn’t a huge shock since those genes run in my family. John and Dale Morgan look almost as alike as Nick and I do. They’ve been best friends since they were born, just like Nicky and me. My parents have been married 30 years this coming summer. Uncle Dale and Aunt Jenny have been married almost as long. And, from what I can tell, the couples are very happy and very much still in love. So, I knew I was talking to the right men about this problem I was having. It was the actual talking about it, or even figuring out how to bring up the subject, that was causing me stress.

  We were sitting in the local diner eating lunch. Dad and Uncle Dale had opted for cheeseburgers and fries with vanilla shakes. I had decided to go with the BBQ pork sandwich and chips. I had scarfed my food down in about 20.4 seconds and now just sat fiddling with the table cloth while Dad and Uncle Dale ate at a normal pace. I caught the men look at me strangely and then exchange glances with smirks on their faces.

  “So, Nathan, to what do we owe this little lunch invitation? It’s not that I don’t love a meal with my brother and nephew, but you’ve not really ever initiated the invites. And, Boy, you look like you’re a little nervous. What’s going on?” Well, at least Uncle Dale brought it up. Now I just had to take the bait and run with it.

  I took a drink of my water, breathed deep, then blurted out, “How did you guys know that you were ready for a relationship?” Ok, there, it was out. Now these two wise men could impart all of their knowledge on me. I was ready for it, heck, I almost thought I should be taking notes.

  What I didn’t expect was for the two jack asses to start laughing. They both let my little question sink in, looked at each other, then started chuckling. The chuckling turned to straight up laughing when they caught each other’s eyes again. “Not cool, assholes. I’m serious here and you’re laughing at me? I came to you because I trust you and you’re laughing at me?”

  “Sorry, Son, we don’t mean to laugh. It’s just darn funny to see you so ruffled. I’ve never seen you even slightly interested in a girl. Now, here you are, asking us about being ready for a relationship. I just never thought I’d see you so antsy and asking this question. Maybe we should pull your mom into this conversation?” Dad was still trying to get his chuckles under control. Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, Dad.

  “No way. Mom is already trying to marry me off and start a reproduction factory, I don’t need her knowing I’m asking about this yet. Don’t mention it to her, ok, Dad?”

  “Well, Nate, there’s one of the number one things about being in a relationship, you can’t have secrets. I won’t straight up tell your mom, but if she asks, I won’t hide this lunch conversation. I’m guessing Dale will do the same with Jenny.” Dad stated this with a look on his face that said I had to accept this condition and if I didn’t accept then I shouldn’t continue. Uncle Dale nodded his head to agree with what Dad had said.

  “Ok, Dad, I can respect that. So, how did you guys know that you wanted to date Mom and Aunt Jenny exclusively? It’s no secret that I’ve never been interested in dating, so I’m having trouble with some of what I’m feeling here. Am I ready? Is it too soon? I’ve not known her for long, but I feel like I’ve known her forever and I want to learn more about her.”

  “Nate, I can’t speak for your dad, but I know, for me, I found myself wanting to spend every spare moment with Jenny. When I had free time, I wanted to see her. I didn’t just want to be around her to kiss her, although that was really nice. I just wanted to be around her to talk to her and be with her. It’s not like I gave up everything I liked to do, I just wanted her to share those things with me. I thought about her all the time. And, for me, a big thing was the thought of going out with another girl or kissing another girl, totally turned me off.” Uncle Dale turned to my dad as if indicating it was his turn to dish on the topic.

  “Yeah, I’d agree with what Dale is saying. I’d be studying and Cindy’s face would creep into my mind. Or, during a class, I’d start to laugh when I’d think ab
out something she said last time we talked. And, this may border on too much information for you, but, it wasn’t a lust type thing. I knew we wouldn’t be taking the relationship to the next level until things were much more serious. At the time, I was figuring wedding ring type serious. So, I knew I wasn’t just thinking about her because I wanted in her pants. I enjoyed the sweet kisses, but it was more than that. I would see something and think about what Cindy would think. I’d hear something funny and want to share it with Cindy. And, like Dale said, the thought of kissing anyone else or sharing funny stories or watching movies with any other girl sort of just turned my stomach. So, that’s when I knew that I wanted to be in a relationship with your mom.”

  “So, Nate, maybe your dad knows more about this than I do, but are you going to share with us who this potential relationship may be with?” Dale inquired with a bit of a grin. I shook my head at how much these men were enjoying me being a little uncomfortable.

  “Wait, wait, let me guess!” Dad exclaimed. “Is it a sweet little librarian? Long, thick, dark hair? Beautiful gray-green eyes? Shy little thing? Did you two work past that little misunderstanding you had?”

  “Yeah, Dad, thanks to you, we worked past that. Luckily. No thanks to me and my big mouth. I’m so grateful that you helped me out with that. So, I’ve sort of been seeing Libby or talking to her, whatever you want to call it, and I have to say that she’s totally thrown me for a curve. I’ve never lasted more than 1-2 dates with a girl, and that’s only if it took me that long to sleep with her. Sorry, Dad, I know this is definitely too much information for you! Maybe you COULD keep this part from Mom, just this once?” My dad didn’t commit to an answer, but I knew that he was very well aware of how Mom would feel if she heard this. Mom wasn’t stupid, she knew I was having sex. She had sat me down in high school and had “the talk” with me even though she knew Dad had talked to me in Jr. High. But, that didn’t mean that she was ok with her son sleeping with random girls and forming no emotional attachments.