Betrayed (Whiskey Nights #4)

by Suzannah Daniels

  “It?” I asked, annoyed. “His name is Joseph.”

  My mother grimaced. “I hope you’re planning on getting a DNA test.”

  Jessica cleared her throat. I turned to see that she had picked up Joseph. Her purse and the diaper bag were slung over her shoulder, and she marched straight toward me. “If y’all will excuse me, I have to go to work.”

  My mother stepped to the side, and I watched, words failing me, as Jessica headed toward the parking lot. What in the hell just happened?

  My mother brushed past me, entering my apartment. “Your father talked to me about the loan on the gym. You’ll need his signature, and I can assure you he won’t sign the loan papers as long as she’s living here. I don’t care whether the child is yours or not.”

  “What the hell does Jess have to do with the loan?” Damn, there was so much shit swirling in my head I was having a difficult time forming cohesive thoughts.

  She gripped my arm. “You’re my son. You know I only want what’s best for you, and she’s not it.” My mother went to stand beside Rachel. “You need someone you can build a life with.”

  “You want what’s best for me?” I asked.

  “Of course I do,” my mother answered.

  “Then let me be alone. I’ll talk to you later, Mom, but right now, both of you need to leave.”

  “Paxton!” my mother shouted, clearly offended.

  I pointed toward the door. “I’m serious. I am not having this conversation.”

  “Fine, I’ll leave. But know this, I mean business. No loan unless she’s gone.”

  She walked out the door, followed by Rachel. I pushed it closed, grateful to be by myself.

  I had a lot of questions eddying in my mind and not a lot of answers.

  ***

  As I stared at the red digital numbers on the clock in my darkened living room, I wished I had gone to Flex Appeal. I could have caught up on paperwork or worked out. Anything would be preferable to watching the minutes tick away as I waited for her to come home.

  The house was quiet.

  When she first came to live here, I longed for the silence I had enjoyed ever since I moved out on my own. I hadn’t been used to sharing my space with anyone, and that was the way I liked it.

  But now….

  It was too damn quiet.

  And I noticed it every time she left.

  I replayed the night of the charity masquerade ball over and over in my head. I could picture the brunette, and I tried like hell to remember what happened after I’d gotten to her hotel room.

  But there was nothing.

  No flashes of memories. No snippets of conversations.

  Absolutely nothing.

  Having entire sections of one’s memory missing was some scary shit. What was even odder was that other people who had been around me during one of those times seemed surprised when I told them I couldn’t remember. They always told me they had no idea I was experiencing a blackout. And as far as I knew, I couldn’t tell, either, at the time. At least no one ever told me that I had mentioned it.

  Judging from my missing condom and the fact that I had met someone in her hotel room, I assumed I’d had sex. One thing that had never occurred to me was that the sex had been with Jessica.

  Or that she’d gotten pregnant despite the fact that I used a condom. If I used a condom. Hell, I couldn’t remember.

  Who would believe that I was a dad?

  I leaned forward in the recliner and rested my elbows on my thighs. Burying my face in my hands, I tried to make sense of this bizarre situation.

  I’d been waiting all evening to find out this was some elaborate scheme, that a hidden camera would be revealed, or that I would wake from a dream.

  The old adage that truth is stranger than fiction echoed in my head.

  What was stranger still was I actually liked the idea that Joseph belonged to me. In the last few hours, I’d thought of no less than a hundred different things I wanted to teach him, some obvious like how to play football, some not so obvious, like how to admit when he was wrong.

  When Cade found out yesterday that he would be a father, I could have never imagined that I would find out the same thing less than twenty-four hours later.

  I watched the time on the clock change again. She should have already been home.

  Dialing her number, I willed her to pick up the damn phone. The more it rang, the angrier I grew. I hung up and dialed her number again. She still didn’t pick up.

  The phone beeped, indicating I had reached her voicemail. “Damn it, Jess, call me back. You’re not home, and…I’m worried. I just want to make sure that you and Joseph are okay.”

  I hung up, a sick feeling twisting the nerves in my gut.

  Where the hell was she?

  ***

  Sleep failed me the entire night. Right before dawn, I forced myself to go to the gym, working out until the burn in my muscles matched the burn in the pit of my belly.

  It was much later in the day when Cade came in.

  “Where is she?” I asked.

  “Where is who?”

  Clenching my jaw, I glared at him. “You know who.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “Flanagan? Lizzie?” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the front counter. “I know this might come as a surprise to you, but I know several shes.”

  “Jessica. Where is Jessica?”

  “Now that, I couldn’t tell ya. I haven’t seen her since we left Gulf Shores.”

  “Y’all didn’t keep Joseph while she was at work last night?”

  Cade shook his head. “Nope. Must’ve been Mrs. Hawkins.”

  “You haven’t talked to Mom?”

  “No.” Cade laughed bitterly. “But then that’s not overly surprising, is it?” His brow furrowed. “Why? What’s going on?”

  If Mom hadn’t yet spewed the gossip, then I saw no reason to go into specifics now. “Jessica didn’t come home last night.”

  “Were y’all fighting, or do you think something’s happened to her? Did you try to call her?”

  “Of course I tried to call her.” I took a deep breath, trying my damnedest not to take my frustration out on my brother. “And we weren’t exactly fighting, but we weren’t exactly not fighting, either. Not to mention Mom insisted on voicing her unwanted opinion right in front of Jessica.”

  Cade groaned. “If Mom had anything to do with it, then I don’t blame Jessica for hitting the road. That woman’s damn near impossible to deal with.”

  “Yeah, and that doesn’t even cover the fact that the whole incident started with Rachel. Mom was just the cherry on top.”

  “I told you Rachel was crazy. One of these days, you’re going to learn to listen to me.”

  I exhaled and ran my hands through my hair. “Shit, I couldn’t even sleep last night.”

  “Why don’t you go home? Hell, she may be back by now.”

  He was right. She may have been waiting for me to leave before she came home to sleep. I slapped Cade on the shoulder. “You know what? I think I’ll take your suggestion.”

  It was midafternoon by the time I reached my apartment. Not only was Jess not there, but there was no indication that she’d been there at all.

  Shit!

  I tried to call her again, but it went straight to voicemail.

  I stuffed my phone in my pocket and clasped my hands around my nape, trying to stretch out the tension in my neck.

  I wanted to see Jess, and I wanted my son home.

  Jessica

  My nerves were wound tight. I needed to have a conversation with Paxton, and after hearing what his mother told him, it was obvious that she would never accept me.

  And what about Pax? Did he think I had tricked him that night at the party? I was going to discuss that night with him, but first I wanted to think through my own reaction. What if he accepted Joseph? What if he rejected him? Did it make a difference to him whether he was the biological father? This might be my only chance to f
ind out how he truly felt. I wanted to know, but at the same time, I was terrified.

  When I’d gotten pregnant with Joseph, my biggest fear was being a single mother. I hadn’t taken into consideration that dating men would also be a challenge. It didn’t matter how much I loved a man. If he couldn’t be the kind of father my son needed, then I couldn’t continue a relationship with him. Joseph was getting old enough to start forming attachments. I didn’t want him to bond with a man who wouldn’t want a long-term father-son relationship with him.

  Sweat trickled on my brow as I paced the floor in my dingy hotel room. Paxton had wanted Rachel to think we were a family, but that was before he found out that I’d taken his watch. In that brief moment, hope had blossomed in my chest that things could work out for us, that he really did love Joseph. But Rachel was right. Paxton knew I was a liar and a thief. I may not have stolen his watch, but I knew it belonged to him, and I’d kept it from him. That was probably the same thing as stealing, right?

  Things had already changed, and my future with Paxton was about to come to a head. It was do or die, and I was terrified that death loomed over me. All this time, I’d concerned myself with whether Paxton would be a good dad for Joseph in the long run. Now, maybe Rachel was right. Maybe I wasn’t the kind of person Pax thought I was.

  My stomach growled, and I ignored it as I continued to pace over the worn carpet. I couldn’t eat, not with so much uncertainty hanging over my head. I hated this feeling. It was the same feeling that had rendered me incapacitated when he had dumped me years ago.

  Loving someone was terrifying. It meant giving him the power to consume my every thought, to affect every aspect of my life and of my son’s life, to bring me the most intense pleasure or the most crippling pain.

  My chest constricted as I struggled to fill my lungs with oxygen. I held a palm to my forehead as nausea swept in and sent me running to the toilet. After expelling a small amount of bile, I tried to hold my hair back as my body strained with dry heaves.

  Why did I let Paxton affect me this way?

  Feeling slightly better, I straightened and wet a washcloth, holding it to my face.

  I’d been through hell before. No matter what happened between us, I was strong enough to handle it. I knew from experience that the pain would recede a little each day. It would never fully go away, but it would become bearable. I would always love Paxton on some level, but I would survive without him.

  I’d done it before.

  I could do it again.

  After dressing for work, I roused Joseph from his nap and got him ready for the babysitter’s. When I reached Mrs. Hawkin’s house, she immediately wiped her hands on her apron, took Joseph from my arms, and kissed his cheeks.

  “Before you leave,” she said, “grab the bag on the kitchen table. I fixed you a bowl of beef stew and some cornbread for supper.”

  Mrs. Hawkins was always sending me out the door with something to eat, and I graciously accepted it even though I had no appetite. “Thank you.”

  “No problem, dear.”

  I gave Joseph a kiss and headed to work.

  The night crept by, leaving me too much time to think. By the time my shift ended, I was exhausted, and given my lack of sleep the previous night, I hoped I could get Joseph settled in at the hotel and we could both pass out for the night.

  I went to the dressing room and slid a pair of jeans over my shorts. After grabbing my belongings and walking to the car, I opened the back door and set the bag of untouched stew on the floorboard and tossed my purse and my jacket in the backseat.

  When I turned back around, a man close to my age blocked my driver’s side door, startling me. I recognized him from the club. He was intoxicated, and I remained still, waiting for him to speak.

  “Hey, baby, you got plans tonight?”

  “Yes, I do.” I waited for him to move on, but he just smiled while his eyes settled on my cleavage, making me wish I’d actually worn my jacket to the car.

  He took a step closer, and I took a step back.

  “Anybody ever told you you’re gorgeous, darling?”

  “Look, I appreciate the compliment, but I’m not interested, and I need to get home.”

  He reached out and touched a strand of my hair, sending a shiver down my back. “Why don’t you come home with me? I got a pocket full of money if you’ll give me a private striptease and show me those pretty tits and that sweet ass.”

  “You’re mistaken,” I assured him. “I’m not a stripper. I’m just a waitress.”

  “If you strip for me, you’ll be a stripper.” He chuckled.

  “No, now get out of my way.”

  He grabbed my wrist and tugged. “Come on, baby.”

  I yanked my hand from his grasp. “I said ‘no.’”

  He reached for me again, and I was jerked backward as Paxton stepped around me.

  “Get lost, asshole.”

  “What did you say?” the drunken man asked.

  Paxton took a step closer to him. “She’s made it very clear that she’s not interested. You can walk away now, or you can have your ass kicked to the curb. Your choice.”

  The man sized Paxton up, and after swaying a moment, he finally turned away, grumbling.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked.

  He opened the back door and yanked out my jacket, holding it up for me. “Put this on.”

  I pushed my arms into the sleeves and pulled it into place. “I had everything under control.”

  “Yeah.” Shadows stretched across the dimly lit parking lot, but I could tell he was frowning. “It looked like it.”

  “I did,” I insisted.

  “And what would you have done if he had kept on?”

  “I would have kicked him in the nuts.”

  “Which would have made him drunk and angry.”

  “I don’t need you to take care of me.”

  His jaw ticked. “Obviously.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  He exhaled loudly. “It means you were pregnant with my baby, and you didn’t even bother to tell me.”

  “And what would you have said? What would you have done? You’ve never wanted kids.”

  “Maybe I never planned on having any, but that doesn’t mean I would have walked away.”

  “Doesn’t it?” I asked, angry. “That’s what you did before. You walked away from me.” My ire rose. “I loved you, Pax! And you walked away from me and left me alone.”

  “I already told you that I broke up with you for your own good. You had a scholarship, Jess, a chance to have a better life.”

  “Better than what? I wanted to go to college, but I didn’t want to have to choose between it and you.”

  He pointed at me, his brows drawn together. “And that’s why I made the choice for you.”

  “It wasn’t your choice to make,” I screamed, all the emotions of that night rushing to the surface. “I loved you.”

  “You loved me? Really, Jess? Is that why you turned to Cade? You turned to him then, and you turned to him now. You were pregnant with my child, and instead of telling me, you went to my brother for help.

  “Oh, hell. Why am I just now thinking about this?” His hands curled into fists at his sides. His brows were angry slashes that shadowed his eyes. “If he knew, I’m going to beat his ass. Did he know the baby was mine?”

  “I never told Cade I was carrying your baby.”

  We were both silent as we digested each other’s words. “Paxton?”

  He closed his eyes and leaned against the car, choosing not to answer me. I had to tell him the truth, but first I wanted him to answer a question.

  The nausea returned. “What about Joseph?”

  “I always live up to my responsibilities. If you’d given me the chance sooner, I would have made sure you had whatever you needed for him.”

  I nodded. I had wondered if he might mention that he loved Joseph, but the only thing he spoke of
was responsibilities.

  “Is that what he is to you? A responsibility?” I asked, frustrated but knowing I was the one to blame.

  He sighed. “What do you want me to say? You don’t want me to take responsibility for him?”

  “You have no responsibilities to Joseph,” I said softly.

  “What the hell are you talking about?” He grabbed his nape with both hands. “Talk to me, Jess, because I’m feeling pretty damn lost at the moment.”

  “I never told Cade that Joseph was your baby. In fact, I didn’t tell you that he was your baby, either.”

  “You told me you were at the party, and you told me that was the night Joseph was conceived.”

  My head bobbed up and down as I confirmed his statements. “I was there, and I did see you. You were sitting at the bar, and when I saw you, I couldn’t breathe. You looked incredible in your black suit, and since I was wearing a mask, I went to the bar and ordered a drink. I was far enough away that you wouldn’t interact with me, but closer than I’d been in seven years. I couldn’t resist the chance to see you, even if you didn’t know it.

  “You were even more handsome than I remembered. Your shoulders were broader. And you seemed more masculine, more sophisticated, sexy.

  “I had actually thought about talking to you, but then I saw you staring at this gorgeous girl dressed in red. And I saw her staring at you. I should have gotten up right then and sat beside you. You don’t know how many times I’ve wished that I could have a do-over of that exact moment.”

  “You never talked to me?” he asked, his brow furrowing.

  “No, you started talking to her. She left, and a few minutes later, I saw her hand you a piece of paper. I watched you read it.” I exhaled as I buried my face in my hands. “This is so embarrassing. I know I sound like quite the stalker, and if it had been anyone else, I would have never done it, but I followed you as you walked down the hall.

  “I’d had a couple of drinks, and as the liquor kicked in, I thought maybe I could do it. Maybe I could actually take off my mask and talk to you. But then you knocked on her hotel door, and when she opened it, you kissed her. Her hands were all over you, and she was laughing, her mask still in place. When she grabbed you and pulled you in the room, the watch fell on the floor, and the door slammed.