Pursuit For Lucidity (Crashing Waves)

by Marie Jem

  “All right. But only on one condition, we snooze for ten more minutes,” he bargained.

  “I won’t argue with that,” I replied, snuggling closer to him. The ten-minute snooze felt extremely short and we still had a few minutes to eat breakfast before we headed out. I gave Alex the extra remote for the main gate before he left, so he wouldn’t have to wait for the guard every time he came over. He hugged me and gave me a long kiss and whispered in my ear, “Miss you already,” and got into his car.

  “Miss you too, Alex. See you tonight,” I watched him drive away and left just a few minutes later.

  <><><>

  When I arrived at work, Taryn seemed to be meeting with Walter in his office. It was obviously not something I had scheduled, since it was not on the calendar.

  “She just barged in again,” Laura began. “She didn’t call or make an appointment. I’m beginning to think she is the CEO and not Walter,” we both laughed. “I heard her telling Walter that the surgeons are requesting more OR time and have been talking about operating in other hospitals if they don’t get what they want here. It’s the same story, I’ve been hearing it for years,” Laura added.

  Laura’s wedding was going to be in the Spring. We went to lunch together that day and she showed me pictures of flowers and cakes that she liked.

  “You’re invited to my wedding, by the way. Once I confirm the exact date, I will let you know so you don’t make other plans, okay?” She asked, excitedly.

  “I wouldn’t miss if for the world, Laura,” I assured.

  It was getting closer to the weekend and I was getting excited. I was still undecided about what I would be wearing on Saturday night, but I knew one thing for sure; I needed to borrow one of my mother’s Jimmy Choo shoes because they were very sexy and comfortable enough to dance in for hours. I called my mother to ask if I could borrow them and would stop by after work to pick them up. She sounded very excited about my upcoming weekend and couldn’t wait to hear all about it afterwards.

  I drove to my parents’ house after work to pick out the shoes.

  “Oh, Claire, these shoes would go so well with your nude dress with the black lace stitching. You should definitely wear that dress and these shoes to go with it,” my mother reminded me of the perfect dress.

  “That’s a good idea, mom, thanks. I was still confused about what to wear, but you’ve made it easier now,” I thanked her.

  I decided to make turkey tacos that night, which was another easy item on my menu. My brothers always loved it when I made that, so I assumed Alex would like it as well. I called Alex to tell him what I was going to make for dinner and he sounded thrilled. I couldn’t wait until he arrived, so we could eat together. A few minutes after I finished making the tacos and chopping everything, Alex knocked on the door.

  “Hi, baby. Mm, smells good in here,” he said as he kissed me.

  “Hi yourself,” I said as I kissed him back. We sat down and started eating the tacos. Alex really loved them. He couldn’t stop complimenting me on how delicious they had turned out. He must have been really hungry because there were no leftovers. I told him that I stopped by at my parents’ house to borrow sexy shoes from my mother’s closet. I wasn’t going to show him until he saw the whole outfit on Saturday night.

  “Not even a glimpse? Please, baby,” he pleaded, making a sad face.

  “Nope, sorry. I think you will like it when it’s all put together with my hair and makeup done,” I explained.

  “Fine. I will wait. Good things come to those who wait, right?” he grinned. “So, I ran into Mark today and he told me all kinds of crap about the rude email you sent him. He mentioned something about how you would have to ask your boss if you could help the department with work related things. He went on and on. I wanted to break his teeth, but I held back, since you don’t want anyone to know about us. You cannot imagine how badly I wanted to tell that son of a bitch to back off and that you are mine, but I bit my tongue. I bit my tongue for you, baby,” he added. “By the way, for such a hot girl, you’ve got some balls. That’s such a turn on, Claire. It’s getting harder and harder to keep my hands off of you,” he confessed.

  I leaned closer to him and whispered in his ear, “I never asked you to keep your hands off of me, just as long as they stay on the safe areas of my body,” I clarified. His taco fell out of his hand and onto his plate.

  He started kissing me, “Show me the safe areas,” he commanded. I took his hand and put it on my abdomen.

  “Here and above are the safe areas. Just stay above the waist,” I said.

  He smiled, “We are making progress, baby,” he was like a little boy in a candy store. Alex was so excited that his hands were all over me, like an octopus. I had to put an end to his excitement, so we could clean up and go to bed. He had an early morning surgery scheduled for the next day and I didn’t want him to be distracted.

  “Oh come on, Claire, I was having so much fun,” he said disappointed.

  “I know, Alex. That much fun leads to danger,” I replied. “Come. Let’s get some sleep,” I said as I kissed him.

  <><><>

  I was awakened by Alex’s alarm at four in the morning and could not go back to sleep. I tossed and turned, but I just couldn’t fall asleep to save my life. Alex kept hitting the snooze and I kept awakening from the next alarm. He finally got out of bed and jumped in the shower. I decided I would get out of bed and do an hour of yoga, since I could not sleep. When Alex came down stairs, he found me in the living room turning on the television. “Good morning, beautiful. What are you doing up so early?” he asked.

  “I couldn’t go back to sleep, so I thought I would do yoga before work. I can’t think of a better way to start my day,” I said.

  Alex wrapped his arms around my waist, “I could think of a few great ways to start off my day, but I know you wouldn’t agree,” he smiled.

  I kissed him, “Goodbye, Alex. See you tonight,” I replied.

  “Bye, baby. Miss you already,” he said as he headed out. After my yoga session, I showered and dressed. I ate a bowl of oatmeal and began my drive to work.

  Walter called me from his office the minute I made it to my desk, “Good morning, Claire. Could you please send out another meeting invitation to the surgical team? Taryn mentioned more of the surgeons would like to meet to discuss more OR time. Schedule it for next Thursday morning around seven, please,” he said.

  “Sure, I will get right on it,” I replied and began creating the meeting invitation, in high hopes that Mark Kohler and Taryn Simmonds would not be able to make it. I had such a busy day that I didn’t realize that it was almost one in the afternoon. I had a text on my phone from Alex.

  I’m out of the OR. Can we meet for lunch at Bradley’s?

  Ok, I will head out that way now.

  I told Laura I needed to run a personal errand during lunch and drove to the diner. Alex was sitting at our usual table. “Hey, beautiful,” he said as he stood up, giving me a kiss. He looked worn out from the surgery, but very handsome, as usual.

  “Hey, you look a little tired, Alex,” I noted.

  “I am tired. We had a pretty difficult case today, but we managed to complete the first of many surgeries successfully,” he replied. “I’m going to Guatemala next week for some pro bono work I do a few times a year over there as part of the Make Children Smile Foundation. I will be doing some craniofacial plastic surgery and cleft palate repairs on children with such defects. I’ll be gone for a couple of weeks. I wish you could come with me, Claire. Would you come with me?” he pleaded.

  “Alex, I’m very new in my job. You know I couldn’t just up and leave. Besides, it’s a part of your job and you will be working most of the time making children smile. I think it’s great that you are a part of such a wonderful foundation, offering your services for free to those children in need,” I replied. “I will really miss you, though,” I added.

  “Not even for a week? Walter will understand, Claire. Just tell h
im you have to go see family in another state or something,” he said, trying to convince me.

  “Alex, I really can’t. Not now anyway. Maybe later on, when I have been working at the hospital longer and if we’re still together,” I added.

  “If we’re still together? You don’t see us together in the future, Claire?” he asked.

  “No, Alex, I do. It just came out wrong. I’m sorry. I didn’t really mean it that way,” I clarified. “I miss you already,” I added.

  “Miss you too, baby. Just promise me one thing, will you? Please don’t go out with Mark while I’m gone,” he pleaded.

  I laughed, “Oh God, Alex. Mark is the last guy I would want to go out with,” I replied.

  “All right, I trust you. Let’s finish eating so we can head back. I have a full clinic this afternoon,” he said as we ate quickly and headed back to work.

  <><><>

  I had quite a few replies in regards to the meeting for the following Thursday morning. Alex had replied that he would be doing his pro bono work in Guatemala and would be unable to attend, but it was just my luck that Taryn and Mark would be attending. I sent a text message to Alex.

  Too bad you won’t be able to make it to the meeting next Thursday morning. Your friend Mark will be there with my favorite person, Taryn.

  Awww, baby, I’m sorry. Don’t say I didn’t ask you to go away with me. I was doing you a favor.

  Yeah, I know. I’m hoping Mark and Taryn will hook up and live happily ever after.

  That’s not a bad idea. They’d make a great couple, I think.

  See you tonight, Alex.

  Chapter 6

  Friday came at last and I was very excited about spending the weekend at Alex’s place. I had packed my bags for the weekend and carpooled with him, so that we could drive directly to Malibu after work. He had made dinner reservations for the evening at a romantic restaurant near his house. On the drive home, I observed Alex closely and sensed that he had something on his mind.

  “So, has Mark continued his attempt to seduce you lately?” he asked.

  “Not really. Perhaps my email set him straight. Why? Has he said anything to you about me?” I asked.

  “Let me refresh my memory. Oh yes. Today, he reminded me of what a hot piece of ass he thinks you are,” he responded, annoyed. “You can’t imagine how difficult it’s becoming for me to keep quiet, Claire. Could I please tell him that you’re mine?” He asked.

  “Alex, please, I don’t want anyone to know. I’m breaking all the rules as it is,” I added.

  “What rules, Claire? What rules are you talking about? There are no set of rules that state you cannot date someone from your workplace,” he responded.

  “I know there are no rules against dating in the workplace, but they are my rules. I just don’t want anything to get in the way of my career, that’s all,” I justified.

  “Oh, I understand. I’m so sorry for getting in the way. I didn’t realize I was in your way,” he replied.

  I realized what I said had come out wrong. “I’m so sorry, Alex. I didn’t mean to say that you’re in the way of my career. I meant to say that if there are rumors about us and if we don’t work out in the future, it would be so difficult to work at the same place, with everyone knowing about us and all the talk that goes with it,” I clarified.

  “I can just work at another hospital if that would make you feel better, Claire. I’m really trying to keep things quiet, but it’s very hard when someone like Mark keeps talking about how badly he wants to have sex with you, and which positions he would prefer with you,” he stopped.

  “He says those things to you about me? Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked.

  “I wanted to, but honestly, these are the nicer things that I’m sharing with you. He can get really graphic. He’s a sick bastard, Claire. I don’t want him near you,” he said, in an angry tone of voice that I hadn’t heard from him before. “He has no respect for women at all. He treats them like shit. He’s slept with more than half of the recovery unit nurses. Just be careful with him, baby. He’s bad news, that’s all,” he added.

  “Okay, I will be more firm with him if he contacts me with those intentions. Could we stop talking about Mark? I just want to have a nice, relaxing weekend,” I replied. Alex took my hand and kissed it, rubbing it against his cheek.

  The rest of the drive home was fairly quiet. Neither one of us said much, so it was a relief when we finally arrived at his house. As we headed inside, I was reminded of the first time I was there, the night I told Alex my story. I changed into my dress for our dinner date and met Alex in the living room. He was looking out the big windows, admiring the view of the ocean with a drink in his hand. When he noticed I was in the room, he put his drink down and walked over to me.

  “Baby, I’m really sorry about what happened in the car,” he apologized, wrapping his arms around my waist.

  “I’m sorry too, Alex. I didn’t mean what I said about you getting in my way. It just,” he stopped me by putting his finger on my lips.

  “I know what you meant. You don’t have to explain. I didn’t mean to take my stress out on you. I just need to work through some issues, that’s all. Let’s go and enjoy our evening,” he said, kissing me.

  What issues was he talking about, I wondered. Was he the extremely jealous type? My head was flooding with questions.

  “You look beautiful as usual,” he said

  “You don’t look so bad yourself,” I replied. Alex looked as handsome as ever with his tight fitting shirt and dark jeans.

  <><><>

  Alex had made reservations at Moonlight, which was a very beautiful restaurant in Malibu, overlooking the beach. As we walked inside, we were greeted by the hostess, “Good evening, Dr. Blake. Hello,” she turned to me and smiled, then looked at Alex again. Was she confirming whether I was good enough for Alex? He just smiled and responded pleasantly, “Hello, Maya. This is Claire, my girlfriend,” his smile beamed. Did he say his girlfriend?

  Maya’s eyes widened, “Oh, hello Claire. Nice to meet you,” she said, smiling at Alex again.

  “Nice to meet you as well, Maya,” I replied. Once we were seated and Maya left us alone, I asked Alex, “Did you tell her I’m your girlfriend?”

  “Yes, I did. Do you have a problem with that?” he asked as he looked over the menu. “If so, I can call her back here and tell her you are only a friend,” he smiled.

  “No, that won’t be necessary, Alex. I don’t mind one bit,” I added.

  “Just as long as she doesn’t work at the hospital, right?” he joked.

  Our dinner was very cozy and delicious. After dinner we took a walk on the beach, which was very well lit, since it was a full moon that night.

  “Claire, if you had known me just a year ago, I was a very unhappy man. It was not a good time in my life. I was going through some personal issues, which I promise to sit down and discuss with you one of these days. I’d been drowning myself in my work, just to get through the days, but now that I’ve met you, I feel like a new man. You have a way of taking all the bad away and bringing out the best in me,” he confessed as he softly moved my hair away from my face.

  “That’s very sweet, Alex. You have taken away all the bad in my life too. Who knows, maybe one day I can start running again. With you,” I added.

  Alex beamed, “I’d love that. I would love to run with you. Anything to help you heal from the horrible event in your life,” he said as he held me tight, close against his chest. “Are you excited about tomorrow night?” he asked.

  “Where are we going anyway?” I asked.

  “You’ll find out tomorrow. Come, let’s go home,” he said, taking my hand and walking me toward his car. It was a chilly night at the beach. I loved the sound of the waves striking against the shore. Alex lifted me up and spun me around a few times, then put me back down and started to kiss me. As cold as it was getting outside, his lips were hot as if they were on fire. I felt chills run up and down my spin
e every time his lips touched mine. I was still waiting to be awakened from this beautiful dream.

  Alex held my hand firmly as he drove, without releasing it for a second. The crystal blue color of his eyes stood out, even in the dark. I couldn’t help but stare at his chiseled jaw and dark, perfectly styled hair. He pulled into the driveway of his house and opened one of four garages and parked the Porsche inside.

  “What do you want me to make for breakfast tomorrow morning, baby?” he asked as we walked into his beautiful modern home.

  “Alex, you’re going to spoil me with all your cooking,” I replied. “You’re also going to make me put on a lot of weight,” I added.

  “You don’t like my cooking?” he joked as he pulled me close to him and started to untie my dress. He was so quick that I didn’t even realize that I had only my bra and panties left. “I d-do like your c-cooking, Alex,” I stuttered, holding his arms to keep him from turning into an octopus again.

  He paused to remind me, “I know where the safe areas are, don’t worry,” he said, continuing to kiss me and caress my breasts. “Let’s go to bed,” he whispered.

  “I uh don’t think that’s a good idea right now, Alex,” I noted. Alex stepped back, his face very serious, “I promised, Claire. Did you forget?” he reminded me.

  I smiled, “Okay, let’s go sleep,” I replied. Alex scooped me up in his arms and ran to his bedroom, laying me gently on his bed.

  “I’m going to take a quick shower, I will be back shortly,” he said. I must have fallen asleep while Alex was in the shower. I had the nightmare again. The shadow of the one chasing me, the white van parked to the side, running as fast as I could until the person chasing me caught me. I collapsed and awakened screaming. Alex was standing there with only a towel on his waist trying to calm me down, “Claire, baby, it’s okay, I’m here. It was just a dream,” he said holding me.