I Never Planned on You
Page 18
I want this gorgeous man in front of me, and all I can think of is what if I’m not good enough. As if he can sense that my body tensed under his touch, he pulls back. Oh no, I can feel my eyes beginning to fill up.
“Baby, what’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” Kyler asks as he runs his thumb along my damp cheek, wiping away the runaway tears. I shake my head. He must think I’m seriously pathetic.
“I…well…I’ve…” I try to speak.
Brushing the hair out of my face, Kyler asks, “You what?”
Mustering the strength from the proximity of our bodies, one of his hands on my hip and the other now on the back of my neck, I whisper, “I’ve only ever been with one man.” He knows who without me having to say his name. “What if I’m no good at this?”
He takes my cheeks in his hands, briefly places a kiss on my lips, and pulls back just enough for me to see a smile on his face.
“Not possible.”
He is so close that I feel like I’m drunk on his scent, a mix of cologne, tequila, lust, and want. And that last part scares the shit out of me.
“We don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for or don’t want to do, but please, baby, don’t push me away. How about you come with me and we’ll put a movie on and you let me hold you all night?”
I lean into his touch and nod. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
We walk down the hall toward our rooms. I stop in front of my door, and Kyler stands behind me. He places his hands on my shoulders and kisses the base of my neck, resulting in an embarrassing moan on my end. I can feel his smile without turning around.
“You go get changed and do whatever you need, and then meet me in my room. I’ll get the movie ready. I believe it’s your turn to pick.”
I shake my head. “No, you pick it tonight.”
Kyler raises an eyebrow at me., “Are you saying you like my taste in movies, Miss Jacobs?”
I laugh as I enter my room. “Nope, not saying that at all, Mr. Lawson.”
With that I close my door. I need to take a few deep breaths and compose myself. No need to freak out—he already said I was in control, that we would only do what I wanted—but honestly, what is it I want? He is the first man I allowed to touch me intimately since Emmett. Hell, to even touch me in general besides a few hugs from my father, Zach, Mr. Brian, or people at the funeral as they gave me their condolences. I spent the better part of four years doing my own thing, little contact with anyone really.
Funeral. Emmett. Fuck, what am I doing? I can do this, right? I look over at the photo of Emmett on my nightstand.
Please don’t be mad at me.
We’re just going to watch a movie, that’s all…and maybe I’ll let him kiss me again. I can feel myself blushing at the thought of what happened moments ago as we walked into the house. Those thoughts have my head spinning. I couldn’t stop thinking about our first kiss in the kitchen—how the fuck am I supposed to forget tonight? Maybe I don’t want to…
I shake that thought from my head for now, throwing my hair in a messy bun and changing into a pair of purple cotton shorts and a black tank top. I make a pit stop in the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. I’m not concerned about Kyler seeing me without makeup like I’m sure most girls would be. If he’s seen me crying my eyes out, barely breathing and in full-blown panic attack and yet he still didn’t run in the opposite direction, I would say that means something. I stare at myself in the mirror for a moment and give myself one last “you can do it” pep talk. I’m sure I’m way overthinking this.
With confidence that I can do this, I exit the bathroom and head next door to Kyler’s room. His door is partially open, but out of habit I knock.
“Come in,” he says from the other side. I open the door and see Kyler sitting up in his bed, shirtless, a full-blown fucking Adonis in front of me. My eyes follow the hard lines of his chest.
“Holy shit,” I mutter softly, but judging by the smile that creeps on Ky’s face, I’m thinking I may not have said that as quietly as I thought.
“I was beginning to think you were gonna stand me up.”
I shake my head but still haven’t moved from his doorway.
“Are you just going to stand there gawking at me all night, or are you going to join me?”
I flip him off as I move toward the bed. He senses my hesitation. Ky throws back the covers and opens his arms for me. I see he is wearing teal gym shorts—phew, at least he’s not just in boxers. I climb into bed and into his arms as he adjusts the covers over us. I wrap my arms around his waist and inhale his manly scent. God, how does he still smell so good without showering? I snuggle into him, and he kisses my temple. As soon as his lips touch my skin, all my nerves fade away and I relax into him.
I take a breath to enjoy the moment before asking, “So which shitty movie are you going to make me suffer through this time?”
Grabbing the remote from the nightstand, he presses Play. As the title appears for Office Space, I groan. “Oh no! Are you fucking serious right now? This movie is awful.”
Leaning away from me, his face goes serious. “One”—he holds up one finger—“you said I could pick the movie tonight and two”—he holds up two fingers—“you better take those words back right now.”
I can see the playfulness in his eyes, and I play along. “And if I don’t?” I push up on his chest, and his eyes drop to where my breasts are spilling out of my tank. He grins and leans closer to me. I suck in a breath, thinking he’s going to kiss me, or well, that I want him to. As his mouth approaches mine, I lick my lips. Yep, this is going to happen—I’m going to kiss Kyler in his bed.
When he’s close enough that I can feel his breath upon my lips, he says, “Well, then I’m just going to have to make you.”
I close my eyes, preparing to kiss him and feel his hands on my sides but jump when he begins to tickle me. I squirm under his touch, trying to get away. Fuck, why do I have to be so ticklish!
“Okay, okay, please stop,” I say in between giggles.
He doesn’t let up from tickling me. “Do you take it back?”
“Nope.”
He continued to tickle me, and tears fill my eyes from laughter this time. “Kyler,” I say breathlessly as he hovers over me. “Okay, you win, I take it back.”
He smiles his devilish grin. “Thank you. Now I can do this.”
He closes the space between us and presses his lips to mine. My hands grab the back of his neck to pull him closer as I part my lips. He takes that as an invitation to deepen the kiss, and I welcome his tongue in my mouth. He settles between my thighs, and I grind my hips into his growing erection, forcing a moan from my lips that he swallows up while kissing me. I take his bottom lip between my teeth, and Ky growls at me. Here we are in our twenties, dry humping like two crazed teenagers. I want him and just as I’m about to give him full permission, he pulls back.
Staring into my eyes, he pants, “If we don’t stop now, I can’t guarantee I will be able to. Plus, you need to suffer through this movie, as you so gently put it. I’ll reward you only if you like the movie.”
I groan at him, unsure if it’s the fact that we’re stopping or the fact he’s still going to make me watch this movie.
Ky pulls me back into his arms and restarts the movie. He sets the remote back on the nightstand and turns the bedside lamp off. We watch the movie, and I will admit to myself—but of course not to him—that the movie was funny. There were a few times that I couldn’t hold back my laughter, and he just went “Uh-huh” but didn’t say an “I told you so” which was surprising.
I’m half-asleep when the movie ends and feel Kyler kiss my forehead and softly say, “Good night, Dani,” before I fully fall asleep wrapped in his arms. And it was the best night of sleep I had gotten.
I wake up half expecting Dani to be gone since I don’t feel her against me, but as I open my eyes, I see her next to me with her back to me and her hair spread across the pillow. I don’t want to be a creeper, bu
t I can’t help staring at her. She is absolutely beautiful. I’m not ready to let her out of my bed just yet, so I drape my arm over her hip and pull her closer to me. She makes a slight moaning noise, not ready to wake up, and that sound goes straight to my dick. I wrap her in my arms and nuzzle my face in her neck.
“Good morning, beautiful,” I whisper in her ear and kiss her neck. Her hand lies over mine, trapping it there on her stomach where her tank top has ridden up a little bit. Her fingers lace with mine. I see that her eyes are still closed. I kiss her shoulder and back up her neck and nibble on the sensitive spot behind her ear that I discovered last night, which creates another moan. Shit, this woman is going to kill me this morning.
“Good morning,” she mumbles back with her eyes still closed, but she is smiling.
Her hand tightens on mine for a moment before she unclasps our hands, and I assume she’s going to push me away, but she doesn’t. Instead she leads my hands north on her body under her tank top to her chest. As I reach the underside of her breast, I lean in and whisper, “Are you sure?” I then kiss that sensitive spot again.
She nods. “Yes, please,” she says in a needy voice. I could come in my shorts right then the way she said that, as if she needs me to touch her to breathe. My girl doesn’t have to tell me twice. My hands travel up her breasts to her perfect peaked nipples and brush one with my thumb. She jumps a little before leaning back into me. There is no way to hide my morning erection now. I love the way she reacts to my touch, and I want to see more. I take one breast in my hand, massaging it before moving to the other one. I work her nipples between my fingers, but shit I want to taste her, tease her with my mouth. I’ve fantasized about her breasts and the things I could do to and with them since the first day I met her.
Dani takes her arm and reaches behind my neck to pull me closer to her. She grips the back of my head, her fingers digging into my scalp. The sweet little noises she makes is driving me crazy.
“Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?” I growl in her ear.
Dani grinds her ass against my hard cock. “Mmm,” she responds.
I think it’s safe to say the nerves she had last night are gone, but I’m not going to push her because I’m worried about pushing her too far. But right now all I can think about is getting her naked and squirming under my touch. I press against her as she continues to grind against me. What is this woman doing to me? Dani is already panting and out of breath and I’ve barely touched her. Dani looks back at me through her eyelashes, and I need to taste her, so I pull her face to mine and dive into her mouth, assaulting her tongue with mine. She kisses me back just as fiercely.
She rolls over so that she is facing me and wraps her leg around my hip. We are making out and dry humping like a bunch of wild animals. Her sweet little moans are enough to make me come in my shorts, but I want to make her feel good this morning. Still kissing her, I roll her onto her back and hover over top of her. She opens her eyes and stares at me with those beautiful baby blue eyes that are filled with want and desire, biting her bottom lip as she feels my hand trail from her chest to the top of her shorts. Her eyes begin to close as my hand keeps going, and she doesn’t stop me.
Sliding my hand into her shorts and into her panties, I find her soaking wet. “You’re so wet for me, baby,” I say against her lips before biting that bottom lip myself. I slide a finger inside her, and she grabs on to my shoulders, digging her nails into my skin while I explore her pussy, taking my finger in and out. I know she said she has only ever been with one man, so I plan to take my time and explore her and her needs and show her how good it can feel. Dani begins to writhe under me, and I know she is enjoying it, so I insert another finger and press my thumb to her clit to push her over the edge. I can feel her walls begin to contract around my fingers as I slide them in and out and circle her clit, applying the perfect amount of pressure.
“Oh shit, Kyler…I’m gonna…I’m gonna—don’t stop!”
I know I can push her over the edge by pulling her top down, exposing her breasts, and I draw circles around her nipples with my tongue. Her moans get louder as her hands leave my shoulders and fist the sheet under her. Her back arches and her pussy swallows my fingers as she comes around them. The way her body jolts by my touch makes me want more, but I need to let her breathe and come down from her orgasm high. I am so mentally high-fiving myself right now though. Dani’s breathing starts to even out, but I haven’t moved.
I pull my fingers from her, and I can tell she is disappointed by the loss of me inside her. She finally opens her eyes and watches me pull my wet fingers to my mouth and lick them clean.
“Mmmmm, I didn’t think there was something I’d like the taste of more than your cupcakes, but shit I was wrong.”
I pull her close to me once I lie back down. Her hand travels down my shorts, feeling the outline of my hard cock, but I pull her hand back and lace our fingers together. I’m definitely giving myself a case of blue balls, but I need to show her it’s not just about sex here.
“Baby, this morning was about you. We have plenty of time for me later. I want to explore this thing with you and get to know you more and see where it goes. Will you let me take you on an official date?”
Looking up at me through hooded eyelids, she leans in and kisses me softly.
“Is that a yes?” I ask as she pulls back smiling.
“Yes, but only if you do that again.”
“Oh, you can bet your sweet ass we will be doing that again…that and more,” I reply, winking at her. “And see, I told you last night you’d be rewarded if you liked the movie, so you basically just admitted that you loved the movie.”
She doesn’t say anything because I know she enjoyed both last night’s movie and this morning’s encore.
“So…” Haylee starts as we climb into her car. I knew it—here it comes. I’ve been waiting for it since she and Zach arrived this morning. After a long morning in bed, Kyler and I finally decided to join the real world. When we walked into the kitchen, we were greeted by a giddy and smiling Zach and Haylee sitting at the island sipping coffee. They watched us as we made coffee without saying anything. I knew Haylee would be pressing for details later.
After a hilariously awkward moment between the four of us, Ky and Zach headed to the gym. Haylee later found me in my room rummaging through my entire closet trying to find something for Kyler’s and my official first date. She eyed the pile of clothing spread out all over my bed, and when a wicked smirk appeared on her lips, she didn’t ask what I needed clothes for, instead clapped her hands together and said, “Looks like we need to go shopping,” which brings us to this moment.
“So…” I say back as I buckle my seat belt and place my hands in my lap.
“You and Kyler, huh?” She thinks she’s being funny knowing damn well what she witnessed last night at Lucky’s. I blush, looking out the window as I remember me and Kyler…what it was like to have his hands and mouth on me last night and this morning and sleeping curled up next to him all night.
“Mmmhmm,” I mutter, but it comes out more of a moan.
Hails throws her head back in laughter as she starts the ignition. “Oh, I think lunch might need to be added to our shopping date, and that lunch may need to include cocktails because you better damn well believe you are spillin’ all the details! But first things first, we need to set the mood.”
“What!” I squeal as I see her pull our favorite Katy Perry CD out of her center console and put it in the CD player.
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to be able to jam to this CD with a Jacobs and not feel like I’m being judged. I have watched your brother and Kyler do some crazy and stupid shit over the years, but there is some serious judgment in his eyes when I play this in his presence. It’s like he didn’t even know who I am, even though he’s seen us perform these songs all the time. I guess it was different once it was his girlfriend doing them? I had to channel my inner Katy, all by myself. Now…let’s
go get you all hot for your date!”
I smile as I think of this morning when he had told me that he wanted to take me on our official first date. I mean, I guess baking in the kitchen and watching movies a few nights a week doesn’t exactly count as dates. But what do I know? It’s been four years since I went on a date, even longer since a first date. I feel like I need to brush up on what dating consists of now.
As we head toward the mall, listening to the tunes that made up our teens, I can’t help but wonder what she must be thinking. Is this weird for Haylee seeing me with another man? I push those thoughts to the side because I want to be able to give Kyler a chance, and I can’t keep having Emmett hang over us. I am finally trying to get the fresh start that everyone had pushed on me years ago. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to, it was just that I wasn’t ready. I don’t know that I’m fully ready in this moment, but I am willing to try and give it my best.
We walk almost the entire mall, going in and out of stores. By the time we are done, we both have our hands full of bags, with sore feet and rumbling stomachs. We pile the bags in the trunk and head over to the cute little bistro nearby and are seated on the water.
Haylee and I both order a mimosa and a salad—Caesar with chicken for her, and a steak salad for me. While waiting for the waiter to bring our drinks back, she places her clasped hands on the table and looks at me, scrunching her eyebrows.
“What?” I say as she looks me over.
“I’m trying to figure out who you are and what you did with my best friend?”
I laugh. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
She smiles and sits back in her chair. “Well…it means, look at you, Dani! Look at how far you’ve come recently. You’re opening yourself up to not only us but to Kyler. After all that time away and shutting us out, you actually saw your parents and mine—my mom has not stopped talking about how excited she is about having someone to help her in the kitchen, so thanks.”