When You're Back

by Abbi Glines

  “Hey, baby,” Mase called out as the front door opened.

  I took my list and walked back into the living room. Seeing him standing there in his dusty jeans, cowboy hat, and boots never got old. Believing that he was mine was hard sometimes.

  He smirked and walked over to me. “You keep looking at me like that, and we won’t make it to the grocery store like you wanted to.”

  I knew exactly what we would do instead, and as tempting as that was, I was too scared to chance it. What if I wasn’t pregnant but still could get pregnant after messing up my pills? I patted his chest and smiled up at him, hoping I didn’t show the worry in my eyes. “We need groceries,” I reminded him.

  He lowered his head and claimed my mouth with a soul-searing kiss that made me forget everything but how good he made me feel. “Whatever you want,” he whispered near my ear, then gave me a swat on my bottom. “God, I love that ass,” he added.

  I held up the grocery list. “Priorities,” I told him, and I walked over to pick up my purse.

  “I got one priority, and it sure ain’t a damn grocery list,” he said in an amused tone.

  Was it possible to love someone as much as I loved Mase? Was it even healthy?

  Mase

  Reese called to tell me that Piper was taking her out for lunch on Tuesday. I was glad she was bonding with Piper. I wanted her to have friends here. This would be our world, and having Reese fit into it was important. I needed her to love it here as much as I did.

  When lunchtime arrived, I headed up to Momma’s to get something to eat. Aida’s truck was parked outside, and I paused. If there was going to be drama, I wasn’t sure I could deal with it today.

  She hadn’t left on good terms, and I wasn’t sure why she was back. But then again, I didn’t want to confront her in front of Reese later. Reese had dealt with enough this past month.

  Sighing, I hoped this wasn’t going to ruin my lunch. When I stepped through the door leading into the kitchen, Momma turned to give me an apologetic smile. She had been expecting me; I’d called to let her know I didn’t need her packing a lunch for me and Reese today and that I’d just be eating with her.

  Reluctantly, I turned my gaze to see Aida sitting at the table across from my stepdad. “Dad,” I said, then, “Aida.”

  “You got that list ready for me to give to Johnson? He’ll be by later today.” Dad knew about the drama with Aida, and talking ranch stuff was his way of keeping things level.

  “Yeah, I’ll get it to you after lunch,” I assured him, then walked over to kiss Momma on the cheek and take the plate she had been fixing for me. “I got this. Sit down and eat.”

  “Sorry,” Momma mouthed as she let me take the plate from her. She hadn’t been expecting Aida, either. I nodded and finished filling my plate before turning to the table to sit down.

  I figured ignoring Aida was pointless and tense for everyone. “So, what brings you down here, Aida?” I asked before taking a bite of the creamed potatoes.

  She stiffened some, and I could see the nervous look in her eyes. We never used to be like this. It was a shame she’d messed up our friendship. “I missed everyone. Thought I’d come to see how things were,” she said.

  I nodded and took a bite of biscuit.

  “You ready to start back at school?” Momma asked a little too cheerfully.

  Aida shrugged. “Not really. I don’t know what I want to do, so college seems pointless.”

  “Well, it’s not. You need to build a solid foundation so you can be anything you want to be,” my stepdad piped up.

  Aida nodded. She wasn’t going to argue with him. “That’s what my mom says,” she said with a pout.

  “It’s true,” was Dad’s response.

  I focused on my pork chops. I didn’t have anything to add to this conversation.

  “I expected you to be engaged by now,” Aida said, and I stopped chewing for a second to let her words sink in. What was she trying to imply with that comment?

  Once I finished my bite, I took a long drink of sweet tea and turned to look at her. “Not yet,” I replied.

  A pleased smile touched her lips. Was she taking that as an in for her? Surely not. We had gone over this already.

  “Let’s not discuss Mase’s personal life. When he’s ready to get engaged, he will,” Momma said with a smile that didn’t meet her eyes. She was annoyed with Aida, too.

  “I was just wondering if he’d decided to put a ring on it or not,” Aida said with a shrug, then took a drink of her water while her gaze stayed on mine.

  I didn’t want to give her an explanation, but I also didn’t want her thinking she had any hope. “When I think Reese is ready for that question, I assure you, I’ll ask it. I’m giving her time. She’s been through a lot lately,” I said. The annoyance in my voice was obvious.

  Dad cleared his throat, and I glanced over at him. “Thinking of starting to breed the pygmy goats. Why don’t you meet me over at the east end and let’s brainstorm how to do that? Besides, your momma’s been keeping on at me about wanting goats.”

  Change of subject. Thank you, Dad. I nodded. “Sounds good. I like the idea.”

  “Oh, goody,” Momma said, beaming at Dad.

  He gave her a wink, and I watched my mother blush like a young girl with a crush. That was one of the reasons I loved this man. He loved my momma the way she deserved to be loved. Kiro had never loved her, but I was thankful for that. The life she’d been given was so much better than what she’d have had with Kiro. I had a better life than I would have had with Kiro, too.

  “I have a boarder coming with two Appaloosas in thirty minutes, so I need to get back down to the stables. Mind if I take this last pork chop and a glass of tea with me?” I asked Momma as I stood up.

  She jumped up, grabbed a paper towel, wrapped a biscuit in it, and handed it to me. “Take this, too.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” I agreed. “Thanks for lunch. I enjoyed it.”

  She nodded, although that was what I always said when I left the table. She’d taught me that at a young age. Always thank the cook, and make sure they know you appreciate the meal they served you.

  “Can I come down and see the horses?” Aida asked.

  “You need to stay here and eat. Leave the boy alone, Aida,” Dad said.

  Relieved, I took my hat off the hook by the door and put it back on before heading outside. I’d made it through the meal, and Aida had only been slightly annoying. If she’d just leave before Reese got back home . . .

  I’d missed my lunch with Reese today. I loved getting to see her and hold her in the middle of the day; it helped get me through the rest of it. Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I called her. At least I could hear her voice.

  Reese

  I glanced down at my phone to see the image of Mase’s boots on the screen. I couldn’t answer. Not yet. Not now.

  Piper hadn’t asked any questions when I’d walked out of the doctor’s office. She’d let me sit in silence. I owed her an explanation, though. She had set up an appointment for me with her doctor and got me in fast. No questions asked. Then she had taken me during work hours.

  I hit the Silent button, put the phone back on my lap, and stared out at the road.

  “Sweetie, that man loves you. He worships the ground you walk on. Don’t be afraid to tell him. He’ll be thrilled,” she said softly as she reached over and patted my leg.

  Piper wasn’t stupid. She had guessed why I needed to see the doctor and what the outcome was without my saying a word. I guessed it was kind of obvious. I turned to look at her. “He hasn’t even asked me to marry him. All I’ve done is add more stress to his life. How do I tell him this?”

  Piper frowned. “From where I’m sitting, Mase Colt goes out of his way to make you happy. He’s so afraid of losing you he can’t hold on tight enough. This isn’t going to be bad news for him. Trust me.”

  She didn’t know everything. She didn’t know all the baggage that came along with me. Mase loved
me, I knew that, but he wasn’t ready for more. He wanted us to live together and enjoy the now. He wasn’t planning the future. But here I was, with our future inside me. “I need time to adjust to this myself. I’ll tell him. I’m just not ready,” I explained.

  Piper sighed. “It’s your decision, but he’s gonna want to know.”

  He would. I knew he would want to know. But would he be happy? Or would I just add more baggage on top of everything else? I didn’t want this baby to be any less than adored. I wanted him or her to have the life I didn’t get. I wanted to give my child the life that Mase was given.

  “Don’t wait too long. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to tell him,” Piper said.

  I nodded. She was right. I’d have to tell him soon. But first, I needed to know that I had somewhere to go if he wasn’t ready. I didn’t have just me to worry about anymore. I had another life I was responsible for.

  It was time we went to visit my dad.

  Mase had called again when I got back to work. I had answered the phone that time, because if I kept ignoring his calls, he’d show up at the barn. I didn’t doubt that for a minute. I had told him lunch was great and I missed him. He’d seemed pleased with that, and we’d ended the call.

  Sitting in his truck after work was different. There was this huge secret between us, and I felt guilty for not telling him. He had kissed me and held me against him when he’d gotten to Piper’s. I always felt so safe when he held me.

  The guilt was like a lead weight in my stomach. I was afraid I could lose here.

  “In case she’s still there when we get back to the ranch, I have to warn you that Aida’s visiting. She was at Momma’s during lunch today,” he said, glancing over at me while he was driving.

  I was not in the mood for Aida. Not the best timing. “OK. Did she say why she was visiting?” I asked, trying to sound like this news didn’t upset me.

  He shrugged. “I think she was bored. No real reason.”

  “Oh,” was my only response.

  It was time to visit my dad anyway. If Aida was there, it wouldn’t matter. It just pushed my decision. “Can we visit my father now? I think I’m ready.”

  Mase’s arm rested around my back, and his fingers played in my hair. “I’ll book the flight tonight. You want to call him so he knows to expect us?”

  I nodded.

  He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “Whatever you want, baby. All you have to do is ask.”

  This time, when he called me baby, my hand went to my stomach. How was I going to tell him?

  “Momma sent leftovers up to the house. We can eat and handle the travel arrangements. How soon you ready to leave?”

  “Day after next. I need to tell Piper first and get some things finished up in the office.”

  “Sounds good. That gives me time to get things squared away, too.”

  When we pulled up into the driveway, Aida’s truck was parked outside, and Aida was sitting on the porch steps. Avoiding her wasn’t an option. I had no choice now.

  Mase squeezed my shoulders. “Sorry about this.”

  Before I could step down out of the truck, Mase was there taking my hand. I let him help me down and pull me close to him as we walked toward the house. Aida stood up as we approached. Her eyes looked red from crying, and her bottom lip trembled.

  “I wanted to apologize to both of you,” she said, then sniffled. “I didn’t mean to cause so much trouble. I came back to tell you I was sorry.” She looked directly at Mase. “I miss you. I miss our friendship. I want my cousin back.”

  Mase’s body seemed to relax beside me. “I never left, Aida. But you changed things. You couldn’t accept Reese, and she’s a part of me.”

  Aida nodded and let a single tear roll down her perfect face. “I know. I was jealous. I’d never had to share you before. I’m sorry.” She glanced at me. “I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to break down like I did.”

  “If you can accept Reese and understand that she’s my life now, then we can go back to being friends. You’ve been my little cousin for most of my life. I care about you. I want you to be happy. I just won’t allow you to hurt Reese. Ever.”

  Aida looked as if she were pouting. But then, she had such full lips sometimes it was hard to tell. “I won’t. I promise. I want you to be happy, too.”

  “Then let’s forget the past and start over,” Mase said.

  Aida beamed up at him. “Really?”

  He nodded. “Really.”

  I wanted to believe her. But something in my gut was telling me this wasn’t sincere.

  Mase

  Something was bothering Reese. I couldn’t figure out what, and if I tried to talk to her about it, she went silent. It was almost a relief to arrive in Chicago. My hope was that she needed to see her new family, that she was anxious to see them again though nervous about talking to Benedetto about her past. I just needed to know that was what was making her act so jumpy.

  I was used to her telling me things and opening up to me. This was different. It was like she’d put up a wall and refused to let me in. It scared the hell out of me. If this was because Aida was staying with my parents for a couple of weeks, then I’d send Aida home. I just needed Reese to tell me what was wrong. I felt so damn helpless.

  Benedetto met us at baggage claim, and surprisingly, Reese headed straight into his arms for a hug. I had expected her to be standoffish until she had a chance to speak to him about everything that was bothering her.

  “I missed you,” he said with a look of joy in his eyes as he held her.

  “I missed you, too,” she replied as she pulled back. “Thanks for having us on such short notice.

  Benedetto frowned. “Never apologize for coming to see me. My house is yours. Always, passerotta.”

  Reese’s grandmother also referred to her as passerotta, which she had informed me was a term of endearment that meant “little sparrow.”

  “Nonna is very anxious for me to get you home,” he added, picking up her suitcase and looking over at me. “It is good to see you again, Mase.”

  “Likewise, sir,” I replied. I picked up my suitcase and placed my hand on Reese’s back.

  “I’m glad you’re here. Last time, when you left, Reese’s thoughts went with you. She had a hard time.”

  “I had a hard time leaving her here,” I replied.

  Benedetto seemed pleased with that answer and turned to lead us out to the waiting silver Escalade that his personal driver had pulled up to the curb.

  “You both sit together in the back. I’ll sit up here with Hernaldo,” Benedetto instructed. “Raul wanted to come pick you up, but his afternoon classes kept him from it. He’s very anxious to see you both again.”

  Reese strongly resembled her brother Raul. It was strange looking into his eyes and seeing some of Reese there. Her brother hadn’t been bitter that he was no longer an only child but had embraced having an older sister and seemed genuinely happy to spend time with Reese.

  “I look forward to seeing him,” Reese said, and I knew she meant it. No matter what pain she still harbored for her father, she adored her brother.

  “Nonna will want all of your attention first, of course. She’s already ordered high tea for your arrival. I expect she’ll be in her Sunday best,” he told Reese with a wink.

  Reese laughed and looked up at me. I wished she’d grown up with this life, with this loving, warm, safe family supporting her. But at least she had it now. That was something to be thankful for.

  “I spoke with Nonna last week,” Reese told him. “She was asking when I’d be back for a visit.”

  Benedetto nodded. “Oh, yes, she’s been on pins and needles since your call the other day letting us know you were coming.”

  Once we were all settled into the SUV, the small talk continued. Reese sat close to me, letting me hold her hand in mine. Maybe this was all that had been bothering her. I hoped it was over now and I’d be able to get past that wall she’d
put up.

  It wasn’t long before we pulled up to the iron gates of the DeCarlo estate. The first time I’d visited, I’d had to fight off feeling furious that Reese had been struggling to survive while the man who had given her life lived in total luxury. However, the pure joy on the man’s face as he got to know Reese slowly dissolved my bitterness. I believed that he hadn’t known where to find her. Whatever had kept him away was no longer important. He was in her life now.

  Nonna opened the front door wide, and she was beaming as she called Reese’s name.

  “I’ll help your dad. You go visit your nonna,” I told her, then pressed a kiss to her lips before she turned and hurried up toward her grandmother.

  “She’s good for Nonna,” Benedetto said behind me.

  “Nonna is good for Reese, too,” I told him.

  He nodded, and a look of concern crossed his face. “I wish she’d always had this family. I wish a lot of things, but I did what I thought was best.”

  He’d been wrong. What he’d thought was best had been a nightmare. “Reese’s past is hers to share with you. But I’ll tell you, anything would have been better than the life she survived.”

  Benedetto tensed, and pain slashed across his face. Did he know more than he was letting on? How could he know? “I’ve made many mistakes in this life,” he said, watching as Nonna took Reese into the house before turning back to me. “But that mistake is one I can never forgive myself for. I’ll go to my grave with that part of my soul destroyed.”

  He knew. He had to know.

  “Let’s go inside. Hernaldo will make sure the luggage gets to the correct rooms.” Benedetto gestured for me to walk with him.

  We walked in silence, and I replayed his words over and over in my head. How could he know what Reese had suffered? Who would have told him? She’d come here to tell him and unburden herself of things left unsaid. If he knew already, why didn’t he let her know?

  “Knowing my daughter is with a man who can and will protect her with his life is comforting to me. She loves you, and I can see that you love her. But I want you to understand that if there is ever a time when you stop loving her or you can’t protect her anymore, you must bring her to me. Do you understand?”