Sniper one

by Dan Mills

  The British Army finally moved out of Camp Abu Naji in August 2006 as part of the gradual handing back of power to leave Maysanis largely to govern themselves. It's what they've always wanted.

  Did our three and a half year occupation really make any difference? For Ray's sake, as well as for all those others, I'd like to think so. The place is a democracy now and there is the rule of law, of sorts. The economy has also got a little better – specifically, from really shit to just shit. But every soldier who was there will also know that most of us spent the overwhelming majority of our time just trying to keep ourselves alive.

  By any Western standards, Al Amarah is still the barbaric and remorseless shit hole that the Paras found when they first arrived. The bloke with the biggest stick is still king. It's how they bring their sons up. If you were to stop them fighting, you'd have to change an entire culture and identity. That's just how it works in Maysan. Always has been, always will be.

  As far as the platoon goes, most of the boys are now out of the army.

  Of the original eighteen, just Daz, Smudge, H, Rob, Ben and Sam are still in the battalion. All six were sent back to Iraq for its second tour of duty there in April 2006. Luckily for them, they all managed to avoid a return to Al Amarah.

  Daz got made up to sergeant for the second time, having managed to keep his nose sufficiently clean for a bit.

  Ads was promoted to lance corporal. Then he went AWOL after a scuffle with four German civvies outside a Paderborn bar. Instead of jailing him, the regiment offered him a fresh start with a transfer to the 2nd Battalion in Northern Ireland. He transferred to avoid the nick – and then got out. After a bit of security work, he decided to go back to broking in the City and start earning some proper money again. Wise lad.

  Pikey is nominally still in, but only while he awaits court martial for allegedly smacking a Red Cap round the head with an ashtray in a German nightclub. The plonker then went AWOL, while the copper had to have twenty-five stitches in his neck. He's back now, but he's going to have to do some serious time in the glasshouse for that one.

  The company hierarchy are all still in too.

  Dale was promoted to Warrant Officer First Class and is now a Regimental Sergeant Major for another battalion. It's a shame he wasn't the battalion's RSM; he'd have been one of the best we ever had.

  Major Featherstone was posted to the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst as a senior instructor. There, he taught, among others, Princes William and Harry leadership and adventure training. Tigris the mongrel lives with him in the Home Counties now. He smuggled her out of Iraq on a series of RAF helicopters and then on a BA flight back to London thanks to a campaign by the Sun when the army refused to fly her.

  As for Redders, he learnt a lot in Iraq – so much so, he was appointed the battalion's Adjutant, one of the most responsible positions in it.

  Three of the sniper lads chose women over the army.

  Having repeatedly vowed to never settle down, Chris promptly got married in Las Vegas to a Royal Military Policewoman on his return home. Both of them left the army and moved to Leeds, where Chris now drives cranes. He says he likes it 50 metres up in the air on his tod because nobody can harass him with bullshit there.

  Fitz also got out after ten years' service to settle down to a normal life with his wife and kids. He would have made a fantastic senior NCO, but he could never be bothered to put himself in for it. He loved shooting too much.

  And Longy got out when his missus gave him a final ultimatum: the uniform or her. Self-pleasure was evidently no longer enough for him. Now he's a carpet fitter.

  Des went back to Johannesburg to take over the family property business. He said he lost the desire to go for SAS selection because he got what he had wanted out of Iraq.

  Oost is a security guard at a university, with a goatee, long hair and tattoos all up his arms now. A terrible waste of a really fine soldier. Hopefully he'll have second thoughts and get back in.

  Gilly forgot about the 'RLCs' after Iraq for an easy life in Paderborn. But he signed himself straight out of the army as soon as he heard about the battalion's upcoming second tour.

  Finally there is Louey, who's working as a bodyguard in London. He could be mine any day.

  As for me, I'm now back with the battalion again. I leave the army soon as I'll have served out my full 22-year engagement. I've no idea what I'll do next.

  Sgt. Dan Mills was decorated for his command of an eighteen-man sniper platoon during the siege of Al Amarah. During a long army career he has served in Bosnia, Kosovo, Northern Ireland, and the Falkland Islands. Sniper One is his first book.