The Irish Trilogy by Nora Roberts

by Nora Roberts

  The smile spread to a grin as their meal was set before them. As they ate, conversation drifted into generalities, an easy flow of words, as undemanding and soothing as the wine that accompanied the food.

  “Come,” he said suddenly and rose. “Dance with me.”

  Before she could voice agreement or protest, she found herself being led to the dance floor and enfolded in his all too familiar arms. Her first stiffness at the contact melted as she relaxed against him, surrendering herself to his movements and the quiet music. Surely, she decided, allowing both mind and body to float, everyone’s entitled to a taste of heaven. Tonight I’m taking mine. Tomorrow will come, all too soon.

  The night was magic, as if a fairy had granted her a wish, and the very briefness of it heightened her senses. She tucked all the sights and sensations into a corner of her mind to be treasured and sighed over when day broke the spell.

  It was late when they stepped into the warm night, and though Adelia’s eyes were heavy, she wished the evening were just beginning. Clinging to the last enchanted minutes, she made no objection when Travis drew her close to his side in the cab.

  “Tired, Dee?” he murmured, his lips brushing the top of her head so lightly she was not sure she hadn’t imagined it.

  “No,” she said on a sigh, thinking how right her head felt cushioned against his shoulder.

  He laughed softly, his voice slow and warm, and his fingers stroked through the silk of her hair until her mind drifted into the world of half-dreams.

  “Dee?” She heard her name but, loath to rouse herself from the heavenly comfort, she made a small murmur of protest. “We’re back,” Travis announced, lifting her chin with his finger.

  “Back?” Her heavy lids opened, and she stared at the face so close to hers, dreams and reality mixed into confusion.

  “At the hotel,” he explained, brushing tumbled hair back from her face.

  “Oh.” She sat up, realizing the dream was over.

  He was silent on the elevator ride to their floor, and Adelia used the time to regain her grip on reality. They moved to her door, and Travis removed her key from his pocket to unlock it as she raised her head to thank him. The smile she meant to accompany her thanks faded as she met his eyes. The concentrated, steady look caused her to step backward, only to find herself trapped against the doorframe, while he closed the distance without seeming to move at all. His hand slipped beneath the curtain of her hair, while he caressed her neck in a slow, lazy motion. They gazed silently at each other; then, very slowly, he lowered his head and pressed his mouth to hers in a kiss that was as soft as a summer breeze, unlike the others he had given, and ultimately more devastating. She clung to the lapels of his jacket, trying to steady her world, but soon gave up all such efforts and moved her arms to encircle his neck, rising on her toes to meet him demand for demand.

  His lips moved to trail along her face, brushing easily along cheeks and closed lids as if savoring the taste. Trembling heat was replaced by a new and poignant languor, a weak giddiness induced by a far more potent potion than champagne. Her hands moved to tangle in his hair as her body melted to his, submitting to whatever he would ask, willing to give whatever he would take.

  She felt his hunger when his mouth took hers again, the hardness of his body as he pressed her more urgently against him, and with a moan of pleasure at the new demand, she drew him yet closer. The longing to be possessed, insistent and clamorous, raged through her like fire. She strained against him, her heart throbbing and echoing in her ears as she felt him devour what was offered, then demand more.

  Abruptly he released her mouth, his hand moving to brush against her cheek and linger a moment, and she closed her eyes again, inviting his lips to claim hers.

  “Good night, Dee,” he murmured, and, giving her a nudge into the room, he closed the door between them.

  Adelia stared at the smooth, empty panel, bringing her hands to burning cheeks. Stunned both by her unprecedented actions and by the sudden rejection, she found it impossible to move. She had offered, and he had refused. Even in her inexperience, she knew her willingness could not have been mistaken for anything other than full surrender. But he had not wanted her, not completely. Her own standards had dissolved in his arms, but he had walked away and left her alone. And how else could it be? she asked herself, shutting eyes tight on threatening moisture. I could never be anything to him but a groom for his horses. Someone who amuses him from time to time. He was only being kind to me, trying to show me a pleasant evening. She trembled once. I should be content with that and stop searching for what can never be mine. Glancing down at the soft folds of her dress, Adelia reminded herself she was not Cinderella, and in any case it was long past midnight.

  ***

  They boarded the plane the next morning in a warm, light drizzle. Again, reporters hounded them. Adelia scurried up the ramp, leaving the men to deal with them. Shaking raindrops from her hair and her cream-colored skirt, she pressed her face to a window and watched Travis disengage himself from the press.

  During the flight, she skimmed through a magazine, reluctant to enter into conversation. Travis’s attitude toward her that morning had been casual, friendly, and vaguely preoccupied, and the stirring need in her that lingered from their previous evening made it a strain for her to mirror his mood.

  When he disappeared into the forward cabin with Steve, she let out a deep breath and began to pace the lounge. What am I to do? she asked herself desperately. How can I control the way he makes me feel? I’ll be making a fool of myself over him; he’s bound to see the way I love him. Then he’ll be feeling sorry for me, and I couldn’t stand that. I’ll just have to find a way to keep more distance between us.

  Her gaze wandered over to her uncle, all thoughts of her problem fleeing her mind as she observed the unhealthy cast to his normally ruddy skin.

  “Uncle Paddy.” She moved to him, cupping his face in her hands and studying him carefully. “You’re not well. What is it?”

  “Nothing, Dee.” The strain in his voice drew her brows together. “I’m just tired.”

  “You’re like ice.” She knelt down in front of him so that their faces were level. “You’ll see a doctor the minute we get home. It won’t be long now; I’ll fetch you a cover and a cup of tea.”

  “Now, Dee, I’m just feeling my age.” He stopped and grimaced in pain.

  “What is it?” she demanded, hands already searching to comfort. “Where are you hurting?”

  “Just a twinge.” The words came out in jerks before he began to gasp for air.

  “Uncle Paddy! Merciful heaven, Uncle Paddy!” She clutched at him as he collapsed, falling forward out of the chair and into her arms.

  She was not even aware that she shouted for Travis over and over, desperately, helplessly, as she lowered her uncle onto the floor. But suddenly he was there, brushing her hands aside, his head lowering to the stocky chest.

  “Tell John to radio ahead for an ambulance,” he called to Steve over his shoulder, his hands beginning to push in a steady rhythm on Paddy’s chest. “He’s had a heart attack.”

  With a moan, Adelia clutched Paddy’s hand to her own heart as if to transfer her strength. “Travis, in the name of heaven—Travis, is he dying? Oh, please, he can’t be dying.”

  “Stop it,” he commanded sharply, the words as effective as a slap. “Pull yourself together. I can’t deal with this and hysterics as well.”

  One breath came and went quickly, then she took several more, deep and steady, her hand clutching and unclutching convulsively over Paddy’s. Slowly the hysteria was buried under a wall of control, and she began to stroke her uncle’s head and speak in soft, reassuring tones, though she knew he probably couldn’t hear her.

  Seconds dragged and minutes crawled with Travis continually monitoring the unconscious man’s pulse, only Adeli
a’s murmurs breaking the silence. She felt the change in the plane’s speed and the loss of altitude, heard the whine of the landing gear and felt the jerk of wheels on ground, but her flow of words continued, and she kept her uncle’s hand firmly in hers.

  She watched through a haze of unreality as paramedics worked on him before transferring him to the waiting ambulance. As she made to join them, Travis took her arm, telling her they would follow in the car. She went without protest, her mind and heart encased in the numbing ice of fear.

  She responded only in vague monosyllables to his attempts at consolation, and after a glance at her pale, waxen features, he concentrated on weaving through the traffic toward the hospital.

  The long wait began in a small, cheerless lounge scattered with ancient magazines which some read to pass the time and others stared at in desperation. Adelia did neither, but sat, still as a stone, her hands gripped together in her lap, neither moving nor speaking as Travis paced the room like a caged tiger. Her mind was screaming in protest, searching for the power to pray as fear devoured her. Her control was tight, stretching at the seams like an ill-fitting coat as the minutes passed.

  When at last a white-coated figure approached, Travis whirled and advanced on him. “You’re Padrick Cunnane’s family?” the doctor asked, glancing from the tall, powerful man to the small, pale woman.

  “Yes.” His answer was curt as he too glanced at Adelia. “What’s going on? How is he?”

  “He suffered a coronary—not a massive attack. He is conscious now, but his condition is aggravated by anxiety over someone named Dee.”

  Adelia brought her head up. “I’m Dee. Is he going to die?”

  The doctor studied the pale, composed features and took a step closer to her. “We’re doing all we can to stabilize his condition, but his own anxiety is a factor in his recovery. His concern is focused on you. I’m going to let you see him. You must do nothing to upset him; persuade him to relax.” He turned back to the dark man whose eyes were fixed on the woman. “Are you Travis?” At his nod, the doctor continued. “He wants to see you too. Come with me.”

  Travis took Adelia’s hand and lifted her from the chair, leading her after the retreating white coat.

  “Five minutes,” the doctor cautioned, and led them into the Cardiac Care Unit.

  Her hand tightened in Travis’s as she saw her uncle in the hospital bed, wires and tubes joining him to machines that whirled and buzzed. He was pale and drawn and suddenly old, and her mind screamed in revolt as she struggled for control.

  “Dee.” The voice was weak and unsteady, and she moved close to take his hand in hers.

  “Uncle Paddy.” Kissing the hand, she held it to her cheek. “Everything’s going to be fine. They’ll be taking good care of you, and soon you’ll be home again.”

  “I want a priest, Dee.”

  “All right, don’t worry.” A cold hand gripped and squeezed her heart, and she felt the trembling start in her knees but forced it away.

  “It’s you I’m worried for. You can’t be left all alone again, not again.” His voice was rasping, and she soothed and murmured. “Travis . . . is Travis here?” He continued to fret, and she turned, fear shining from her eyes.

  “Right here, Paddy.” He moved to stand next to Adelia.

  “You’ve got to take care of her for me, Travis. I’m giving her to you. She’ll be all alone again if anything happens to me. Such a wee thing she is and so young. It’s been too hard for her. . . . I should have been there for her before. I was going to make it up to her.” He made a feeble gesture with his free hand. “I want your word you’ll be taking care of her. I can trust you, Travis, with what’s mine.”

  “I’ll take care of her; you have my word.” His answer was calm and steady, his hand closing over the two that were joined. “You don’t have to worry about Dee. I’m going to marry her.”

  The relaxation in the taut face was visible, his breathing slowing. “You take care of my little Dee, then. I want to see the two of you married. Will you bring a priest here, and let me see it done?”

  “I’ll arrange it, but you’ll have to relax and rest. Let the doctors do their job. Dee and I will be married right here this afternoon. All I need is a judge to sign a waiver of the two-day waiting period.”

  “Aye, I’ll rest till you come back. Till you come back, Dee.” She forced her lips into a smile and placed a kiss on his brow before she followed the doctor and Travis from the room. She whirled on him as soon as the door closed behind them.

  “Not here,” Travis commanded, gripping her arm. “Is there somewhere private we can talk?” he asked the doctor in calm tones. After directing them to an office, the doctor closed the door and discreetly left them alone.

  Chapter Seven

  Adelia jerked out of Travis’s hold as the door shut, fear and despair bubbling into fury. “How could you do that? How could you tell Uncle Paddy you were going to marry me? How could you lie to him that way?”

  “I didn’t lie, Adelia,” Travis returned evenly. “I have every intention of marrying you.”

  “What are you thinking of, saying such things?” she continued as if he had not spoken. “It’s cruel, with him lying there sick and helpless and trusting you. You had no right to make such a promise. You’ll break his heart, you—”

  “Get a hold of yourself,” Travis commanded, taking her shoulders and administering a brisk shake. “I told him what he needed to hear, and by God you’ll do what he wants if it helps save him.”

  “I’ll not be a party to such a cruel lie.”

  The grip on her shoulders increased, but she was beyond physical pain. “Doesn’t he mean anything to you? Are you so selfish and hardheaded that you can’t make a small sacrifice to help him?” She flinched as if he had struck her and turned blindly away, her hands gripping the back of a chair. “We’ll stand in that room this afternoon, and we’ll be married, and you’ll make him believe it’s what you want. When we know he’s strong enough, you can get a divorce and end it.”

  She drew her hands over her eyes, pain washing over her in turbulent waves. Uncle Paddy lying there half dead—Travis telling me we’re marrying and divorcing in the same breath. Oh, I need someone to tell me what to do, she thought frantically.

  To be his wife, to belong to him—she’d wanted it so badly that she hadn’t even dared to think of it, and now he was telling her that it was going to happen, that it had to happen. She was hurt beyond words. It would have been easier to go through life without him than to be his wife for an hour without his love. Divorce—he had said it so easily. He was talking of divorce before he had even put the ring on her finger. Taking a deep breath, she tried to force herself to think clearly, but she was too overcome by the bleak realization that he was not talking of a real marriage, a marriage of love, that he didn’t want her for herself, but rather for her uncle’s sake. There must be another way. There had to be another way. She swallowed painfully to steady her voice. “I’m Catholic. I can’t get a divorce,” she said dully.

  “An annulment, then.”

  She stared at him in horrified silence. “An annulment?”

  “Yes, an annulment. It should not be any problem if the marriage isn’t consummated. It will simply be a matter of a little paperwork.” He spoke in calm, businesslike tones, and her hands tightened on the chair as she attempted to fight her way through to reason. “For Pete’s sake, Dee,” he said impatiently, “can’t you go through the motions of a ceremony for Paddy’s sake? It won’t cost you anything. It could make the difference between his living and dying.”

  He took her shoulders again, spinning her around, checking his anger as he studied the transparent glow to her skin, the fear in her eyes that stared back at him. He could feel the trembling begin under his hands and watched as she shut her eyes and tried to stem it. He muttered an oath, then dre
w her against him and wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sorry, Dee. Shouting at you is hardly going to make it any easier, is it? Come on, sit down.” Leading her to a sofa, he sat beside her, keeping her close inside his arms. “You’ve been hanging on to control for too long; have a good cry. Then we’ll talk.”

  “No, I don’t cry. I never cry. It doesn’t help.” She held herself rigid in his grasp, but he continued to hold her close. “Please, let me go.” She felt her control slipping and struggled against the arms that would not give way. “I have to think. If I just knew what to do . . .” Her breath came in short gasps, the trembling no longer controllable, and her hands clutched at his shirtfront to keep from falling. “Travis, I’m so afraid.”

  She burst into violent sobs, and his arms tightened around her. Once the tears escaped, she could not stop them. Held in check for more than a dozen lonely years, they now flowed freely down her face pressed into Travis’s chest. He kept silent, one hand stroking her hair, and let the storm run its course.

  The sobs lost their force, subsiding to soft whimpering, until she lay quiet in his arms, empty and spent. She gave one long, shuddering sigh. “I’ll do whatever you think has to be done.”

  ***

  How Travis arranged the paperwork so quickly, she never questioned. She had been too numb to deal with technicalities. The only stand she had made was to refuse to leave the hospital even for a quick rest or a meal. Determinedly, she had planted herself in the waiting room and refused to budge.

  She signed her name on the license where she was told, greeted the slender young priest who would make her Travis’s wife, and accepted a handful of flowers from a friendly nurse who claimed a woman couldn’t be a bride without a bouquet. She smiled at this, a small, frozen smile that hurt her cheeks, knowing she was not really a bride. Legally she would bear the name of the man she loved, but the vows they would exchange would mean nothing to him. The words and motions were only a charade to bring comfort to a sick man.