Human Conditioning

by Hirst, Louise

  He ran down the stairs and called Dr Crow, the man to whom Kamal paid a lot of money to treat his workforce when accidents occurred – and, more importantly, to keep his mouth shut thereafter.

  Chapter thirty-five

  “Close your eyes.”

  “Aiden, what are you up to?” Lily beamed at her husband beside her in the driver’s seat of his brand-new Jaguar XJS V12. They had come off the M1 at junction 10, and were heading up the Luton Road towards Harpenden.

  “Trust me… close them,” he urged. He was concentrating on the road ahead, but his smile was wide and his manner was playful and excitable. It was a version of Aiden Foster that no one else ever saw. It was just for Lily, and she loved that it was. Lily closed her eyes. “Don’t peek,” he instructed seriously yet with good humour. Lily felt the car slow down dramatically and turn left onto gravel. They moved slowly over pebbly ground for five, ten seconds before turning right and coming to a halt. Aiden switched off the engine. “Alright… open.”

  Lily blinked and stared through the passenger window at a beautiful detached house made of light brick, and dark wooden beams. The house was huge, with eight large windows on the second floor, stretching to the left and the right of the car. The large wooden front door was directly opposite them.

  Gazing at the love of his life, Aiden put his hand over hers. He took in her beauty and, as usual, she left him breathless. Lily had always had the power to weaken him. She had been the only person to do so. He couldn’t imagine ever letting her go again. He had an innate need to possess her, so strong that he could actually feel it stirring inside of him. She was and always had been his. No one and nothing could ever come between them again. If he lost her, all hell would break loose. He would go crazy for sure.

  “You’re stunning, d’you know that?”

  Lily turned to the man she had doted on ever since she was thirteen, her expression a mixture of excitement and confusion about the house he had brought her to. She wondered if he had bought it, but she didn’t want to assume. Maybe he was merely showing it to her.

  Aiden grinned, reading her bemused expression. “It’s ours,” he announced.

  “Really?” Her soft voice hit an octave higher than usual; a familiar sign that she was thrilled.

  “We’ve been married a few months now, and I know it’s taken longer than we’d both have liked, but now my new deal is up and running, my business partner Kamal thought we should have our own place. It’s just a loan. I’ll have to pay him back, but… it’s all bought and paid for.” Lily unclipped her seat belt and threw herself at him. “Blimey, babe!” he laughed.

  She gave him a long, fervent kiss. “Thank you. It’s perfect,” she whispered against his lips, her eyes sparkling with affection. The intensity of her love and passion for the man before her was utterly overwhelming. No one should need and love a person as much as she needed and loved Aiden Foster. Like a flame without oxygen, she just couldn’t survive without him. “I love you.”

  “I love you too, darlin’… more than you know.”

  Aiden drew her close and kissed her passionately, slipping his tongue into her mouth. The familiar tremor of exhilaration coursed through Lily’s entire body as he pulled her into his hard body, but all too soon he pulled back, leaving her wanting. With his arms wrapped tightly around her, so that their noses were nearly touching, he asked, “Ready to see our new home?”

  Lily breathed heavily in his arms, reeling from their closeness in the confines of the Jaguar. She whispered, “I’ve been ready since the day I first saw you. Do you remember?” She smiled gingerly, gazing into his twinkling blue eyes.

  “Yes,” he replied quietly and seductively, and she felt his hands slowly trace down her back. “Outside your form room… if I remember rightly.”

  “Yes!” Lily’s breath hitched as his hands found her backside, pulling her closer so that she was practically straddling the gear stick.

  He whispered at her ear, “I fell in love with you in that moment too.” Lily closed her eyes and relished the sensation of his hands and lips. He kissed her earlobe, adding, “Now… let’s go and take a look around the house before we christen the driver’s seat of my new car.” She felt his grin against her flesh and it sent electric shivers down her spine and to the place she longed for him to be.

  Despite her insatiable desire, she surrendered and, peeling herself out of his embrace, she scrambled out of the car. She waited for Aiden then followed him up the gravel driveway, watching him intently from behind as he pulled out a set of keys and unlocked the front door.

  As she stepped into the large hallway of their new home, Aiden closed the door and took the tops of her arms. “Happy?”

  She nodded, a timid smile visible on her flushed face. Her desire for him was palpable. Aiden raised an eyebrow and stepped back. Raising a hand to his face, he tapped his fingers on his chin and smirked at her. She glanced up at him through the strands of hair that fell naturally over her face. “What is it?” she asked coyly.

  He raised his eyebrow higher. “I know that expression, Mrs Foster.”

  Lily gulped. Her mouth was bone dry all of a sudden. He stepped into her, obliging her to step back against the wall, and one of his hands crept around the back of her neck and beneath her silky hair, the other tracing the material of her summer dress by her thigh. Lily blinked up at him. Caged beneath his large body, her breath hitched with anticipation. He gazed down at her, his hand stilling at her hip. Leaving it there, he bent down and, ever so slowly, began to leave trailing kisses from her chin and up her jaw. “Welcome to your new home, Mrs Foster,” he whispered, biting her lobe gently as his hand began to move again, taking the hem of her dress.

  Lily let out a quiet groan, her sex pulsing at the sensation of his teeth at her earlobe. With one swift move, his hand was beneath the material of her dress and tracing the silk of her knickers. She could bear the torture no longer. She needed his lips. Gripping his hair, she pulled him down to her and immediately his tongue entered her mouth with fervour. She felt hands snake around her behind and, suddenly, he lifted her into his arms.

  She wrapped her legs around him and he took off with her towards the stairs. She let out an excitable squeal as he sprinted up the wide staircase with her in his arms, as if she were a small child, and locating the master bedroom, he padded over to the king-size bed then laid her upon it and crawled above her.

  “You furnished the place too?” she whispered breathlessly, realising, even in her lustful fluster, that the room was equipped with not only a bed, but bedside cabinets and two double wardrobes opposite the bed, all in matching oak.

  Aiden smiled, knowing that a part of her would be disappointed that she wouldn’t have the chance to decorate it herself. “Only a few of the necessities… the rest is in your hands, Mrs Foster.” He winked impishly, and the gesture urged her to lose herself in him once more. Taking his face between her palms, she pulled him into another long kiss. But Aiden pulled back and she whimpered in disapproval. “I wanna show you something,” he said, and leaning over to the set of drawers next to the bed, he opened the top drawer and pulled out a box that Lily recognised immediately.

  She frowned, her arousal fading instantly, as if the power cord to her libido had just been unplugged. “Is that my pill?”

  Aiden nodded. “I don’t want you taking these anymore, alright?”

  Still frowning, Lily tried to take the box from him. She was suddenly embarrassed, as if Aiden had discovered a big secret that he shouldn’t know. Of course, he knew she was on the pill: they had had an enormous amount of sex with no protection and she hadn’t fallen pregnant. But all that sort of stuff was never discussed – not with her family, not with Aiden. It was private, and she would have liked it to remain that way.

  Holding himself above her, Aiden pulled the box out of her reach. “Have my baby. Make lots of babies with me!” he laughed.

  Lily was suddenly irritated. “Stop it, Aiden. You’re embarrassing me!”r />
  He flung the object of her embarrassment across the room and fell above her, his arms either side of her head. Gazing down at her, he said, “I mean it. Start a family with me.”

  Lily stared up at him in astonishment. He wanted to start this now? She wasn’t sure what she felt about that. Of course, she wanted to start a family with her husband at some point, but so soon? They’d only been married a few months! “It’s a little soon, Aiden,” she muttered quietly.

  He leaned down further and placed light kisses on her eyelids and her nose. “I want this, love,” he said, between kisses.

  “I know, but…”

  “Please… I want you to be the mother of my children.”

  “And I will… but…”

  His kisses ceased and he stared down at her. He looked distressed. “I need to know that you have someone here keeping you company. I work hard, baby. I’m not going to be here all the time. Things are changing… they’re getting bigger and bigger. Business is going to take me away, and I can’t have you lonely.”

  “I won’t be…”

  “Lily!” he chided.

  She stared back at him in shock. He was angry. Why? “Why are you angry with me?” she whispered.

  He sat back and ran a hand over his face. “Because I know you’ll get lonely. You’ll want me around and I won’t be able to be there for you every time you need me… and I know what loneliness can do to a person,” he tailed off and closed his eyes.

  Lily suddenly understood what this was about. “I’m not her,” she said quietly. “I always thought she was the stronger one out of us both, but I’m stronger than her, Aiden. Aiden… please, look at me.” She sat up and ran the tips of her nails over his cheek and he opened his eyes. “If it means that much to you, I will think on it, OK?”

  She could see by the clench in his jaw that he was gritting his teeth. He wanted to argue with her; he wanted to demand that she do as he said. She could tell. She knew him well. Aiden had grown into a man who was used to getting what he wanted when he asked for it. But this he could not demand of her. This – having children – was one of the biggest decisions she would ever make in her life, and she wasn’t about to be bullied into it.

  She was well aware that Aiden held his tongue many a time when she didn’t jump at his every command, but she truly believed that that was why he loved her so much. It was why their relationship worked. He was brash, impulsive and bossy, and she was calm, collected and persuasive. They made a good team and she wouldn’t change the dynamics of that team for anything.

  “Why can’t you just do as I ask, for once…?” Aiden sighed in exasperation.

  Lying by her side, he stared up at the ceiling, his arms beneath his head. Lily turned on her side and gazed down at him. It was as frightening as it was amusing that he ask her to have his baby as though it was as insignificant as asking a child to do the dishes. It was testament to a strange, childlike trait that Aiden rarely displayed. He couldn’t bark this kind of order at her and expect her to comply. This was a life-changing decision, one that required discussion, not instruction.

  She cast these thoughts aside and settled on tackling the real problem. “You feel guilty…” she said.

  He glanced at her then his eyes went back to the ceiling. He hesitated before answering, “A bit, yeah.”

  “Because you didn’t support Gina when she lost the baby?”

  He sighed. “Yes.”

  “Do you want to apologise to her?”

  “No!”

  Lily tried to read him. His eyebrows were furrowed. He was in deep thought. “Have you seen her… since…?” she muttered, but tailed off when he abruptly turned his head to face her, his cheeks flushing with annoyance. “I’m not accusing you of anything,” she added with frustration. “I’m just trying to talk this out with you… it is clear something is eating you up, but you’re just giving me yes, no answers.”

  Aiden sat up. “This conversation is done.”

  “Aiden…”

  “IT’S DONE!” he yelled.

  Lily swallowed back tears as she watched him stride from the room. Swinging her legs off of the bed, she stepped over to her little packet of pills and picked them up. She hadn’t taken her pill today, and opening the packet, she popped one out and slipped it into her mouth. They weren’t ready to be responsible for a child just yet. They had their own troubles to work out first.

  Chapter thirty-six

  Aiden sat at the main bar inside the club named Turnmills, located in the borough of Islington on the corner of Turnmill Street and Clerkenwell Road. Apparently it had just won a 24-hour dance licence, the first one of its kind in the UK.

  As he glanced around the dark and oddly decorated room with its Gothic features and strange steel pipeline decoration around the bar, he felt as if he were in a submarine. His lip curled in disgust. He didn’t like it at all. Plus, it was apparently a club for queers, which put it very low down on the list of places he wanted to visit. Not that he was a homophobic – it seemed to be becoming the norm nowadays and, in his opinion, people were free to do whatever the fuck they wanted, as long as it was behind the closed doors of their homes or in places like this club.

  Aiden had come to Turnmills on business, to meet a man named Frankie Adams. Frankie had been so desperate to see him that he’d sent someone to his flat last night to tell him that he had an offer he felt he wouldn’t want to refuse. Aiden had heard of Frankie Adams. He was one of the biggest drug dealers outside of London. Reggie had spoken of him at length many times in the past. He had respected the way Frankie conducted his business and, back then, he had secretly dreaded the day the man moved in on London. Now, it seemed as though this was finally about to happen.

  “Aiden Foster!” A short and slightly emaciated man with grey receding hair, sporting a grey suit, white shirt and red tie, strolled up to the him with a friendly smile on his not-so-handsome face. Aiden stood and could only assume that he was looking at the Frankie Adams. “Frankie,” Frankie announced, holding out his right hand, which was laden with two oversized golden sovereigns on his forefinger and his little finger.

  “Nice to meet you, Mr Adams,” Aiden replied respectfully.

  “Frankie, please.” Frankie studied Aiden’s face for a moment then said, “Shall we go up into the office? It’s a bit fucking garish in here, don’t you think?”

  Aiden didn’t give his opinion and followed Frankie out of the bar, through some double doors and up a flight of stairs. Going through another two sets of double doors, Frankie finally opened a door to their left and led Aiden into a large square office with white walls, and a dark wood desk with a leather chair and some filing cabinets. There were papers and files piled on top of the cabinets and at the edge of the desk.

  Frankie pulled over a chair and gestured for Aiden to sit down, then he settled himself on the leather chair behind the desk. “This is not my office,” he felt compelled to say. “If it were mine, I’d have a drinks cabinet and a record player in here. I can’t be dealing with all this new fucking house music. I think that’s what they’re calling it. They’ve got a bloke on tonight… Tall Paul, you heard of him?”

  “No, I’m not interested in all that electronic shite,” Aiden replied.

  Frankie laughed loudly. “Well, you might not be into it, but thousands of kids your age are, and what’s more, they want to dance to it all night… and that’s where I come in. That’s why we’re here…” He gestured around him, but Aiden knew he was referring to the club downstairs; the club with a shiny new licence that would allow ‘kids like him’ to get off their faces and dance all night long.

  “Ecstasy…”

  “You’ve done your homework, Aiden,” Frankie smirked. He leant forward on the desk, placing his clasped hands out in front of him. Aiden noticed he was surveying him again, almost gazing at him, and for a brief moment, he wondered whether Mr Adams was gay, but he dismissed the idea immediately. “I’ve heard very promising things about you, Aiden.�
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  “Oh yeah?”

  “I think we might work well together.”

  Aiden didn’t respond. He just stared confidently at Frankie, awaiting his description of the offer he had brought him to the club for – the offer that he’d sent one of his minions to inform him of, to his home of all places. The thought sparked a question. “How did you know where I lived?” Aiden asked directly.

  Frankie finally leant back in his chair and for some reason this made Aiden relax a touch. “I have my sources.”

  “Well, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do that again. I’m moving into a new place with my wife next week and I don’t want any of my business coming to her door.”

  Frankie nodded with understanding and held his palms up in a good-humoured gesture of surrender. It was only now that Aiden took in the colour of Frankie’s eyes as Frankie gazed at him with amusement. They were a deep brown, almost black, small and beady, reminiscent of a crow. “Fair enough. It won’t happen again,” Frankie ceded with a smile.

  Aiden shifted in his chair, crossing one long leg over the other. “So, why have you brought me here today, Mr Adams?”

  Frankie moved his hands to his face, resting the tips of his two index fingers on his lips. He watched Aiden intently for a moment before he spoke. “I have a factory and several safe houses, and I need someone to manage them. We, uh, lost one of our associates the other week.” Aiden’s eyebrows rose sardonically at the loose use of the word ‘lost’. Frankie went on, “The factory is managed from a production point of view. I just need you to report the quantities leaving the factory and the amount of money going into the safe houses for counting. I need to know that the merchandise leaving my factory is returning the right amount of revenue back to the houses. Understand?”

  Aiden frowned. “I understand, but why me?”

  “You were educated by one of the biggest drug dealers in East London, were you not? And your association with the KKKs gives you a certain kudos that spoke to me… plus, you’re ruthless, Aiden, I’ve heard.” He smirked as if this fact was music to his ears then added with absolute respect, “No one will dare mess with the likes of Aiden Foster.”