SNAFU: An Anthology of Military Horror

by Jonathan Maberry

  She had folded her arms, leaned forward and craned her neck. But after a few seconds she slowly shook her head. “Nope, nothing.”

  Klaus started to groan in frustration and then had a thought. He held up a finger and then fumbled under his jacket for his water bottle, uncapped it, and splashed the liquid onto the cave wall. The smooth limestone revealed looked like glistening wax. He smiled and sat back on his haunches. “It’s the result of tens of thousands of years of water dripping down to coat everything in micro-mineral particles that hardens to a semi clear covering. It’s the geological equivalent of capturing flies in amber.” Klaus changed the angle of his light beam once again.

  “Oh yeah, I can see inside – yuck – that thing looks weird.” Doris wrinkled her nose, but crouched beside him.

  “Looks beautiful to me.” Klaus tipped some more water over it.

  “Is it a man? He looks deformed or something.” Doris got to her feet, but also kept her flashlight trained on the wet stone.

  “You mean, was. And no, I don’t think he was deformed. Judging by the depth of mineral coverage, I’d say he’s been trapped in there for about at least forty thousand years, maybe even sixty thousand.” Klaus leaned in, his nose almost touching the slick stone. “Not deformed, more like proto-human… probably Neanderthal.”

  He shone his torch at the cave wall and ceiling, before letting it rest on her face. “The sink hole we entered only opened the cave a few days back, and so far the emergency services have kept everyone well away. We’re probably the first people to set foot here for tens of thousands of years.” He raised his eyebrows theatrically, but she just nodded without enthusiasm.

  Klaus shrugged, still feeling the tingle of excitement ripple through him. He leaned in close again, inhaling the smell of the ancient stone. From behind there came the sound of a metallic flicking, followed by a spark of light.

  He spun. “Doris… are you shitting me… you’re smoking?”

  She pointed the cigarette at him like the barrel of a small glowing gun. “I’m nervous. You know I smoke when I’m nervous. I’m nervous, cold, hungry… and horny.” She tilted her nose in the air, but looked back at him out of the corner of her eye.

  Klaus snorted. He knew when she threw in the horny angle she wanted him to do something. Normally she got her way, but this time, his focus remained firmly above his waistline.

  “You smoke when you’re nervous, drunk, happy, sad… face it Doris, you smoke all the time. Show some respect; this cave probably hasn’t seen people for about fifty thousand years… and do you mind not dropping ash everywhere?”

  She wobbled her head. “I’ve seen you smoke too, Mr. High-n-mighty. Besides, who’s going to complain … him?” She jerked her thumb at the lump in the wall, jammed the cigarette between her pursed lips, and flashed a quick glance at the blue Seiko dive watch on her slim wrist.

  Klaus ignored her, and looked back at the encased body. “Maybe… and for the record, it might be a her. We need to dig it out – looks really old and if it’s a good quality fossil, which I think it is, it could be worth thousands.” He half turned. “And the smoke could damage it.”

  “Thousands.” Klaus heard her softly repeat the word, and then came the sound of a foot grinding something into the cave floor.

  He nodded sagely. “Sure, collectors pay a fortune for this stuff. They’ll even pay for pieces of it. We need to get some tools, and cut it out before anyone else finds this cave.”

  Doris crowded in beside him squinting. “Good idea.” She pointed. “Hey, I think there’s a light in there.”

  He followed her finger. “Hmm, might be a reflection – or an opal. Could make it even more valuable.”

  ~3~

  New Berlin, Euronesia

  50,000 AD

  Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go.” Jax slapped each soldier on the back as they jogged past – twenty of the best – combat professionals and genetically bred to be big, tough and fearless. Zone-Cleaners, ass-kickers, terminators; call them whatever you wanted, but they got the job done, the harder and dirtier the better. He had his war party, and they were ready to kick ass.

  The portal flared as they all lined up to one side, awaiting his final inspection. Nano-body armor over iron-hard muscles, fusion bombs, magnetic kill-darts, and burners with enough power to fry a city block. He walked along the line, nodding to each, their eyes straight ahead. He balled his fists and faced them.

  “We are the hammer, and they are the nail. When we strike, they fall. We will not fail… we cannot fail.” He raised a fist, his jaw jutting. “Anything gets in our way, it’s dead.” Jax began to turn away, but paused, his head tilting. He spun back and roared. “I can’t… fucking… hear you.”

  As one, the squad yelled in return: “Anything in our way is dead.”

  The squad leader grinned without humor. “Damned right.” He turned to the glowing portal. “Let’s go and burn some Gimps.”

  He turned his back on them and waited for the portal to open fully and settle itself. The zone they were about to enter was dangerous. The Gimps had evolved, changed, become clever and far more deadly.

  Jax was the senior officer in charge of the top cleanup crew, and he was fearless. He knew his men would follow him to hell if need be… and that was good, because where they were going, there were devils. The Gimps, prehistoric monsters that defied belief.

  He breathed deeply and cast his mind back to how they had got to this point. His lips moved in a silent curse; damn science officers and their weak-willed approach to everything. He was sick of hearing their advice to command: we don’t need to take Cleaners on jumps; the Gimps fear us more than we fear them;we must hold out the hand of peace. Ha, he thought with a little vindication, hold out the hand of peace and you’d fucking lose it. As the science team had just found out… yet again.

  He snorted as he checked his burner’s power cells. Gilbred, that worm, and his know-it-all colleague Hindoy… now deceased. He remembered when the puny excuse for a man had returned from his expedition, shaking like a leaf.

  He glanced at the chronometer. The portal’s synchronizers had identified their destination and started the countdown.

  Thirty… twenty-nine… twenty-eight… twenty-seven…

  There’d been too many trips now. They had burned, interrogated and tortured their way across a lot of the primordial hellhole to get to this point. Now, it all came down to this last zone jump.

  As he waited for the portal to stabilize, he let his mind wander over the events of the past few days. Back to Gilbred and when he had first returned.

  * * *

  Jax lunged forward and yelled into the seated science officer’s face. “You fucking lost it? You get attacked by dumb Gimps, let them creep right up on you and spear your companion. Then you let them take his damn burner?” Jax paced, his jaw clenched. He spun back. “You’d upbraid my soldiers for stepping on a single bug, but in a blind panic you fry ten Gimps.” Jax rushed back, getting in close to the cowering scientist. “Do you have any idea what sort of problems this will cause?” He brought his face so close their foreheads almost touched. “Well?”

  Gilbred squeaked something incomprehensible. Jax stepped around the science officer, his lips tight in barely suppressed fury. He stopped behind the man and leaned in close to his head. “If you had left his body behind, I’d damn well make sure you spend a week in a pain chamber… of my choosing.” Jax straightened, his hands clasped behind his back, chin lifter. “Why do you science guys always think you know what’s best?”

  Gilbred shook his head. “We knew the Gimps were in the area, but they had been so docile before. We didn’t think they’d…” His voice, already high and strained from fear, trailed off as Jax turned, a scowl pulling his face into deep fissures.

  Gilbred hung his head. Jax smiled and patted the man’s shoulder. “You didn’t think. Don’t worry. That’s what we do… and that’s why we told you we needed to accompany you on your jumps.” He snorte
d. “But you knew better.” Jax growled. “Yes, you brainy types always knew better.”

  Gilbred lifted his head. “I can show you where…”

  Jax’s voice was so loud Gilbred nearly fell out of his chair. “Shut the fuck up; you’ve done enough.” He exhaled loudly. “The burners do not corrode, erode, or malfunction – we designed them that way. This thing will be in operation for a quarter of a million years.”

  He sighed and placed both hands on Gilbred’s narrow shoulders, leaning in close to one ear. “Do you know what will happen if those Gimps get that technology? Next time we drop in on them they’ll fry us.” Jax pushed back off the man and walked around in front of him.

  “We need to find it.” He stopped and stared down at the cowering man. “You need to find it. We can’t go back to the same zone twice, so you need to locate the lost burner’s xenon radiation trace and then follow it back up the event slope. Give me a place and a date, and we’ll go get it ourselves.”

  Jax’s voice became soft. “A warning, though. Make sure you’re accurate. It costs a small fortune to open those portals, so we better find it before the general finds out… or it’ll be all on your head.”

  * * *

  The chronometer indicated the unique radiation traces had appeared again, many millennia after Gilbred had lost his weapon, and in a time they were loath to visit. As a further complication there were many traces showing. Somehow, the burner had infused objects around it with the xenon particles, and now they were spread over a large area. Jax and his team had to check every damn one of them.

  His Cleanup crew was a good one – tough and brutal, and all professional zone-jump soldiers. Jax knew they’d need to be. Coming to this type of zone was not recommended. It was too dangerous. The Gimps had evolved a base intelligence, a hunter’s smarts to add to their monstrous muscle power.

  Jax was first though the portal. He stepped into the dark space, only just remembering in time to snap down his faceplate. The air was foul, and the gasses would quickly sear his lungs. Only the giant Gimps, with their enormous bellow-like breathers, could absorb the mix of primordial gases.

  He looked around. So fucking big, he thought. Even though he was a veteran of the class and gender wars, and as battle-hardened as they come, these creatures scared the shit out of him. Each stood three times as tall as his biggest man, and most Gimps could literally tear him or his men to pieces.

  Jax circled his finger in the air, and his team started their search. There were familiar radiation vestiges, but they were faint – the burner had been here. His team examined, probed and searched their way across the dark expanse where the initial trace was detected.

  It only took them a few minutes to return. Nothing on scanners, nothing on visual. Arcad, his lead Cleaner shrugged. “Not here. Might have been once, but not now. What do you want to do?”

  Jax thought for a moment. “Broaden the search area. If it’s not here, I want to know what happened to it. Let’s do a quick check in the outer areas.”

  “Outer areas?” Arcad’s head snapped up. “There are indications of current habitation.”

  “That’s right soldier… and that’s why they pay us the big bucks.” Jax moved to the entrance of the large space and froze, holding up one hand as he heard a sound from outside. He and the team froze.

  Arcad eased up next to him. “Go or no go?” He looked over his shoulder to the portal gateway shimmering in the darkness behind them.

  Jax held up a hand and waited, listening. He placed his ear to the entrance, and then shook his head. “Nothing.” He half turned to his second in command. “I don’t like it either, but we're here to do a job. So… we do it.” He pulled the huge barrier back towards him. It opened easily, with only a faint whine of protest.

  He was first through, his team stacking in behind him. Jax was the most skilled Cleaner in Euronesia and as soon as he orientated himself he knew there was danger. He sensed rather than saw the Gimp as it loomed over them. The sound that smashed out of the darkness made them all want to cover their ears and flee. The greats beast’s maw was open, a near perfect circle, and huge teeth framed the ear-shattering screech that smashed at them like a physical force.

  The Gimp raised one colossal arm. Jax didn’t wait to see if it held something dangerous, he lifted his burner, set to wide beam, and fired. The beast shimmered for a moment or two as the beam struck it, the sound of its terrifying call shutting off as it disintegrated.

  “Shit, shit, shit.” He had no choice. They were loath to remove Gimps from this zone as they had strong social bonding. Too late now, he thought. “We need to move quickly. Give me a thorough search, and then let’s get the hell out of here.” He bristled. Those assholes back home better find him the right zone next time, or he’d personally feed them to the Gimps.

  It took them only a few more minutes to confirm there was no sign of their missing burner. Jax herded his team back to the portal, taking one last look around. He had sealed the entrance, and was sure he had left no evidence from his team. The other creatures would find the remains of the giant beast soon enough, but as long as the crew wasn’t there, the Gimps would be as clueless. Primitives, he thought. And no burner, either. Waste of fucking time. He stepped back through the glowing portal and it immediately snapped shut behind him. The surroundings rapidly cooled, and silence settled once more.

  ~4~

  Berlin, Germany

  Today

  Monroe drank his beer and watched Raptor, his second in command, bring the man down over his knee, the man’s backbone making a noise like a snapping tree branch. He let the jerking body slide to the floor. Monroe knew Raptor didn’t care whether his opponent walked again, or died right there at his feet. Neither did Monroe.

  Raptor’s opponent had been big, beefy, and knew how to throw a punch. Probably won plenty of fights in his time. From the minute Monroe and Raptor had walked in through the doors, the asshole glared, sized them up, and then to the delight of his drinking buddies, decided to get in their face. Monroe told him to walk away. The redneck chose not to. Raptor had gotten to his feet and on his way up, had collected an almighty uppercut under his chin. That was Beefy’s last mistake.

  Monroe grinned and shook his head, watching Raptor stand like a bloody colossus looking around the bar – blond crew cut, pale blue eyes were so light they almost looked alien. Both men stood six foot three, and were as solid as iron from their special forces training. But Monroe was athletically long-limbed, and Raptor was a human bulldozer.

  Monroe pivoted his head, taking in the other bar room patrons; some of them had been drinking with the man Raptor had just brutalized. No-one looked at either of the two men. Raptor’s brutal and efficient violence had made them invisible.

  Monroe’s pocket buzzed. He frowned. It was extremely rare to get called on down time. He and his team belonged to an internal military body simply called Defense. They operated on orders issued from a few generals, and the president himself – they didn’t exist until they needed to. He pulled the disc-reader. Something big must be going down, he thought. He read the message: POSSIBLE NT INCURSION. He grunted.

  NT.

  Non Terrestrial.

  Monroe clicked his fingers and headed to the exit. Raptor followed, but at the door he paused to look back. Not a single person looked up, their drinks now the most interesting thing in the world.

  * * *

  “Victim’s name is Doris Sömmer – at least we think it’s her.” Sergeant Artur Amos led Detective Ed Heisen of the Kripo – the Kriminalpolizei – the through the stinking, dark apartment.

  “Based on an imprint of the driver’s license at the check-in desk, we got a twenty six year-old female, approximately five-eight tall. But… fingerprints gone, weight unknown, hair and eye color also unknown.”

  “Unknown? I thought you said you had a body.” Heisen followed the older policeman, squinting to try and improve his vision in the semi gloom.

  Amos half turned and sh
rugged. “Meh.” He handed Heisen a sheet of paper with some basic background information and a copy of the girl’s driver’s license. A small photo showed a healthy young woman beaming at the camera.

  “What about other prints?” Heisen asked while reading the page.

  “Millions of ‘em.” Replied the short cop.

  Heisen looked up as Amos slowed at the doorway to a room floodlit by halogen lamps and bustling with several shapes in white biohazard suits. Amos flipped a page from his notebook, and read some more.

  “Evidence of a metallic band on the fourth ring finger indicating a possible engagement, but the diamond is gone, and there’s evidence she was with someone. So we’re still looking for trace.” He snorted and stood aside. “And yeah, we thought we had a body too.” Amos pointed with his pen.

  Heisen stepped past the smaller man and looked down at the carpet. There was an ash outline, almost too perfect in detail. He didn’t know whether to laugh or stagger from the room screaming his head off.

  “Jesus Christ! What’d they use, a freakin’ blowtorch?”

  The body, or what had once been a body, was just a thin layer of grey-brown ash in the shape of a figure holding an arm up, either warding off a blow or trying to shield her vision from something.

  Amos pointed again with the pen. “No idea what caused it. But whatever it was, it was fucking hot. We think the ring…” he leaned forward and indicated a darker area on the end of the ash-arm pile on the carpet, “once had a diamond. Well, we think that’s what it was, as the lab boys tell me that there’s a small trace of mineralized carbon ash denser than that rest.”

  Amos looked up at Heisen. “Do you know how hot a fire needs to be before a diamond burns?”

  Heisen shook his head. “I didn’t even know they could burn.”

  “Me neither, but I looked it up. It usually takes about fifteen hundred degrees. But this must have been even hotter and faster, cause if you heat girl’s-best-friend up slowly, it explodes. We reckon this was a burn of about two thousand degrees, and it occurred over a few seconds.”