Family Forever

by Valerie J. Clarizio

  He drained his beer bottle and grabbed another. The squeaking of his rocker recliner was the only noise echoing in the unusually quiet house. That’s all he wanted earlier, just a few minutes of peace and quiet. Was that so much to ask? It pained him to know his brothers would likely never forget the incident. Forgive him, maybe, forget, no.

  Right about now he needed some sort of sign to let him know he wasn’t screwing it all up for everyone, his brothers, Marissa. Marissa. He shook his head. He really screwed that whole thing up. He loved her, and for a while, he thought maybe she felt the same. Yet, he kept pushing her away. Now it was probably too late. She had her friend, Terry. Probably close to a thousand times he tried to justify his actions in that situation, trying to convince himself it wasn’t the right thing to do, to saddle her with a large, ready-made family at her young age. He of all people knew the sacrifices that came with that. It was for the best. For a brief moment, he looked up, to the heavens, hoping God would send the sign. Nope. He strolled off to bed.

  Dylan hadn’t been under the covers for ten minutes when he heard a car door slam. Cole? He flung the covers back and rolled out of bed.

  He entered the living room just as Marissa bounded through the archway between the kitchen and living room.

  “Oh, Dylan,” she said as she leaped toward him and flung her arms around him.

  He pulled her tight to his body. Her tiny body shook in his arms. “Shh, sweetheart, it’s going to be okay, whatever it is will be fine.” He stroked her long, silky hair as he whispered to her.

  She inched back and locked her bewildered gaze on him. “What are you talking about? I’m fine. I’m here for you. I would have been here sooner but I had to wait for Terry to get back to the campus with his car so I could borrow it. The way Braden made it sound when I talked to him the second time, after I talked to you, was that, well, that…” Her gaze fell to the floor.

  Good Lord, what had his brother told her? Heat rose through his body. He’d never been so embarrassed in his life as he was right now with her knowing he’d lost all control the way he did. And Terry; there was that awful name again. Terry.

  She lifted her gaze and met his. The sympathetic look in her eyes angered him. He stepped back. “Like I told you on the phone before, I’m fine. That’s it, end of story. You, Cole, and Aunt Mitzi can all just relax. I have everything under control, and I’ll take care of everything myself like I always do.”

  Her bright blue-eyed gaze dulled as her eyes watered.

  “I just, I…” Her voice cracked, her bottom lip started to quiver, and her words faded.

  A sharp pain shot through his heart and a lump the size of a golf ball formed in his throat. Why am I being such a jerk? She came all this way, in the middle of the night to be with him, to help him, and all he could do was shove her away.

  She spun and took two steps before he snatched her wrist. “Wait, Marissa. I’m sorry. Please don’t go.”

  She stopped but didn’t turn to face him. She patted her eyes with the sleeve of her sweatshirt and started to ease around when Luke stepped off the bottom step and into the living room.

  When Luke realized Marissa was standing there his eyes widened in excitement and he lifted his arms toward her. “Hi, Marissa.”

  She scooped him up and planted a kiss on his cheek. “Hi. What are you doing up so late?”

  “I need a drink of water.”

  “Well, let’s just get you one then.” Marissa carted him off without so much as a backward glance at Dylan.

  Dylan listened to them banter back and forth for a moment before Marissa offered to tuck him in. With Luke in her arms, Marissa returned to the living room and headed up the stairs. Dylan took a seat on the second to the bottom step to wait for her. He wasn’t going to let her leave without accepting his full apology for being such a jerk. She’d have to hurdle him or climb out an upstairs window to avoid him.

  Her last words to his little brother touched his heart like they always did. Secretly, he wanted nothing more than for her to say the same words to him someday. I love you sounding from her soft red lips, directed at him would forever be his dying wish.

  Marissa’s light footsteps sounded on the stairs. They drew closer. He knew he better figure out what to say and say it quickly before she left, angry with him. The sound of her footsteps paused. He could feel her gaze on him, yet he couldn’t seem to turn around.

  She took another step and then sat next to him, turning at the waist to face him. “I’m sorry, Dylan. I didn’t mean to interfere. I was just worried about you.”

  He met her gaze and choked back the lump in his throat. “You have nothing to be sorry for. It was all me. I had a really bad day and I took it out on everybody. I feel truly blessed to know how much you, Cole, and Aunt Mitzi care for me and this family. I don’t deserve it after the way I behaved today.”

  Marissa placed her small, warm hand to his cheek. “I can’t believe you’d believe or say such a thing. You are the most caring and devoted person I ever met. You care for these boys as if they were your own. They know how much you love them and they couldn’t possibly love you more. You are the best thing that has ever happened to them.” She paused, sucked in a deep breath, and let it out slowly. “And you are the best thing that ever happened to me. You took me in, no questions asked, and let me become a part of this wonderful family, and for that, it is I who am truly blessed.”

  His heart thudded in his chest. He tried to pull his gaze from hers, knowing that if she kept looking at him like she was he’d kiss her. And without a doubt, one sweet taste of her lips and he’d need to do more than just kiss her.

  She stared at him like she was waiting for some response, but the emotions running rabid through his body prevented him from forming any coherent thought whatsoever. But he was saved, he didn’t have to think. He only needed to respond as she leaned toward him and pressed her soft, slightly open lips to his. He had dreamed of this day for so long, imagined how her lips would feel against his, and how she would taste. It was a good thing he was sitting down because the overwhelming heavenly feeling slamming though his body would have probably knocked him on his butt.

  Dylan wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tiny body onto his lap. He inched his lips back from hers and lost himself in the depths of her ocean-blue gaze.

  He cupped her milky white cheeks in his hands, then he eyed her kissable lips. Did he risk another taste? He knew the answer to that question. He was already gone, already hers, had been for some time now, but had just been too stupid to act on it. Not any longer. It was time to let himself go. He wanted her, no, needed her as much as the very oxygen he breathed.

  The stairs were not the place he wanted to resume this with her so he rose to his feet with her in his arms. Though he wanted nothing more than to cart her off to his bed, he willed himself to take it slow, and took a seat on the couch, her on his lap, straddling him. He stilled for a moment to realign his thoughts. This was Marissa. He wanted to handle things correctly. He loved her and didn’t want to screw it up, and more importantly, he wanted to make sure she was truly ready. He was all in and wanted to make sure she would be as well.

  He leaned toward her and brushed his lips across hers. She parted her lips slightly, drawing his tongue into her warm, moist mouth. Her sweet flavor seeped into his tongue and then filled every cell in his being. He kissed her long and softly. Her lips stayed on his, matching his every move as if she’d already kissed him for a lifetime. Their tongues danced together as if they’d composed the melody together in a past life. Her slim fingers wove through his hair, and she pulled his head more tightly to her. Instinctively, his tongue dove deeper into the unexplored depths of her mouth. He probed desperately, seeking to absorb every bit of her flavor. His arms tightened around the small of her back as he pulled her toward him, the soft curves under the sweatshirt she wore pressed firmly to him. It crossed his mind to remove the cloth barrier between them but that wouldn’t coincide with the take
it slow idea that was quickly being replaced with the no better time than the present theory. His logical brain was losing the battle to his illogical body.

  Minutes later, Marissa pulled back and stared at him with those bright blue eyes that always caught his attention. Her lips looked puffy. A red hue bordered them. Her normally pale cheeks were flush.

  Her gaze stayed on him as her shoulders rose with the deep breath she took, and then fell when she let it out. “I’ve wanted to do that for the longest time.”

  “Me too.”

  He pulled her to him again and kissed her long and slow, then heated, wet and hard, only coming up for air every so often before starting the process all over again. Who needed sleep? He could do this all night.

  It was still dark outside when Dylan’s eyes popped open. He glanced at the living room wall clock. The boys would be waking soon. It was a school day.

  Marissa’s head rested just below his chin. Her silky strands of hair smelled like a refreshing spring morning and felt soft against his neck. Her small warm hand lay on his chest. Her breaths were slow and even. It felt so right to have her lying in his arms. Though they hadn’t made love, he felt completely satisfied. She gave him exactly what he needed last night. Support, comfort, love, and understanding, just the nourishment he needed to regroup and face another day. If he felt this good just from kissing and holding her, he couldn’t begin to imagine how he’d feel once he made love to her, the woman he loved.

  She stirred momentarily when he slipped out from under her and repositioned the afghan over her.

  Dylan tiptoed into the kitchen and started the coffee brewing, and made Nate and Luke’s sack lunches. Aric and Braden opted for the school lunch when they saw the menu. He had nearly a whole cup of coffee down when he heard the boys tramping down the stairs. Surely that would wake the lovely woman on the couch.

  “See, I told you Marissa was here,” Luke said to the rest of the group as they filed into the kitchen.

  “Shh, she’s sleeping.”

  “No, I’m not, and it's okay,” Marissa’s voice chimed in a perky tone from the living room.

  She stepped into the kitchen. Her smile lit up the room. “Good morning. You guys want some eggs for breakfast?”

  It didn’t matter what she offered to make them, they’d take it just so they didn’t have to make their own meal.

  Dylan set his coffee cup on the counter. “Come on, Luke, why don’t we get you dressed while Marissa makes breakfast.”

  Luke nodded at him.

  “Maybe the rest of you should do the same, then we’ll have time to sit down and eat together.”

  Marissa shot him a smile over her shoulder. The boys hustled back up the stairs. They must have really wanted to spend some time with her because not one of them fought or complained the whole while they got ready for school. It was like a miracle. Or was it the sign from God he’d been waiting for.

  By the time they returned to the kitchen, she had the scrambled eggs, sausage, and toast on the table waiting for them.

  The younger boys talked excitedly to Marissa as they ate their breakfast. He knew they missed her when she was away and he couldn’t blame them. Who wouldn’t miss such a wonderful and caring person? She gave each brother her undivided attention as they updated her on their school, scouting, and sporting activities. Though he was thoroughly enjoying this family breakfast, and the fact that everybody else seemed to be as well, he was also dying to get his brothers on the bus so he could steal a few more minutes of alone time with Marissa before she headed back to school.

  He shooed his brothers out the door and returned to the kitchen to find Marissa clearing off the table. “Don’t worry about that now, I’ll take care of it later. What time do you need to leave by?”

  “My first class starts at nine-thirty so I have about thirty minutes or so.”

  A shiver of excitement shot through him, he could kiss her a lot in thirty minutes. Coincidently, she could kiss him senseless in less than that amount of time, just like she’d done last night. Now that’s something he was willing to risk. At this very moment, he didn’t care if he ever had another coherent thought, he simply needed her lips on his.

  Cupping her cheeks in his hands, he tilted her head up for better access to those kissable lips of hers. The hint of sage from the breakfast sausage mixed with her unique flavor tantalized his taste buds. He dipped his tongue a little deeper into the warm depths of her mouth, sensations swirled in his stomach. His body ached with need but thirty minutes was not enough time to do what he wanted with her. Sadly, that would have to wait for another time. With any luck, perhaps this weekend. Cole had offered to come home for a couple of days to help, maybe he should let him so he could sneak off with Marissa for a couple of days.

  The renewed energy coursing through his veins was definitely attributable to her presence. Yesterday evening, he wasn’t sure he had the strength to go on, and now, he felt like he could climb a mountain or take on three more brothers. He could do anything as long as she was at his side.

  On the verge of needing a crowbar for assistance, he finally managed to pull his lips from Marissa’s. She needed to get on her way in a few minutes.

  * * * *

  Marissa slipped into the bathroom, splashed some water on her face and pulled her unruly hair into a ponytail. She probably wouldn’t even have time to change before class but she didn’t care. With her well-kissed lips, she was happy. Finally!

  She stepped back into the kitchen to find Dylan staring out the window overlooking the driveway. He spun to face her and ran his hand over his unshaven face. A dejected look consumed his face. Where had that come from all of a sudden?

  “What’s the matter?" she asked as she narrowed the gap between them.

  His dark eyes studied her for a moment.

  Unease coiled in the pit of her stomach.

  He shot a quick glance out the window, then returned his curious gaze to her. “I see you borrowed Terry’s car.”

  She didn’t like where this was headed. He was going to point blank ask her about her relationship with Terry. She knew from the beginning, when Cole talked her into having Terry pose as her boyfriend, it would come back to haunt her someday. Countless times, she mentally slapped herself in the head over that charade. Dylan would soon know the truth. For a brief moment it crossed her mind to lie to him now, tell him she and Terry broke up and are now just friends, rather than fess up about her and Cole’s stupid plan to use Terry to make him jealous or convince him that she’d experienced dating like he’d wanted. After the closeness they shared last night, she couldn’t bring herself to lie to him again. Maybe, with a stroke of luck, she could get out of the situation altogether by just answering his question.

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Are you and he…”

  Her no came so quickly the sound of her own voice startled her. Anxiety ricocheted throughout her body. Though she didn't technically lie just now, she didn't come clean either. Not good!

  “So you two broke up?”

  Unable to speak, she nodded.

  “Yet, he loaned you his car?”

  Why couldn’t he just stop with the inquisition? Didn’t he believe her?

  “Yes, we’re friends.” At least that wasn’t a lie. She and Terry had always been friends.

  He leaned toward her and she turned away. “Well, I better get going or I’ll be late for class.” She couldn’t let him kiss her now, not after she just lied to him again.

  He followed her to the door. “I’ll call you later.”

  She forced a smile. “I’d like that.”

  Marissa slid into the car and wasn’t even out of the driveway before her tears streamed down her cheeks. The look on Dylan’s face when she spun away from him let her know he knew something was up. She cried all the way to school. What was supposed to be one of the happiest days of her life was turning out to be quite terrible by her own actions—lying to the man she loved. She parked Terry’s car and would
have just enough time to return the keys to him before heading off to class. After patting her eyes one last time, she flung the car door open and headed in the direction of his room.

  Terry answered the door. The smile on his face vanished in a split-second. “Have you been crying?”

  Her tears started all over.

  He pulled her to him and held her until she backed away.

  His warm hands stayed on her shoulders. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

  She nodded and swallowed hard. “I lied to Dylan.”

  Terry’s knowing gaze expressed his thoughts even before he spoke them. He was hesitant when she asked him to pose as her boyfriend on New Year’s. He even warned her the scheme could backfire, but she eventually talked him into helping.

  “About me?” he asked.

  “Yeah.”

  “He’s not going to come here and pound me or something is he?” he asked with a crooked smile.

  “No, he thinks we broke up,” she said before giving him an overview of what happened with Dylan.

  “So how’s our breakup a bad thing? Wasn’t that part of the original plan?”

  With her lack of response, he continued, “Because now you feel the need to come clean, and you’re afraid he won’t forgive you for lying.”

  She nodded. “That, and he’ll back off because of that crazy notion he has that I need to experience life before returning to Humdrum, USA. He’ll know I’ve done nothing these past five months but work my butt off at school.” She blinked back her welling tears. “What should I do, tell me what to do?”

  “I don’t know, plus, I’m pretty sure you already know what you are going to do. You won’t be able to live without telling him the truth.”

  “But I don’t want to lose him.”

  “I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And remember the dagger he shot at me with his eyes when he thought we were a couple on New Year’s? He loves you. He’ll forgive you.”