Blood Rose

by Jacquelynn Gagne

  Boy was I the bitch now! “Oh god.” My chin dropped, averting my gaze away from him. “Okay. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed I knew you. But how did you know where I live?” On the last sentence, my eyes came back up to meet his. My brow rose as my lips twisted into a tense smirk in mock of his, while in the meantime my stomach was doing back flips of unease. There was no graceful recovery for the way I’d jumped at him.

  “I’m not a stalker. Just observant. Before I started here I didn’t have much to do in town so I just drove around a lot. I’d seen you walking to and from the building a few times. I just assumed. I should have told you instead of making you so nervous. I’m sorry, really.” His grin was gone as he looked me directly in the eye. He seemed so open, so honest and yet simultaneously elusive.

  My shoulders slumped in defeat. “No, I’m totally the one who blew this. I’m sorry I was such a jerk. I had no idea-”

  He laughed bringing his smile to his eyes and shook his broad shoulders which made my cheeks burn. “Don’t be sorry. It’s not the worst accusation I’ve ever faced. Not by a long shot in fact.” His eyes were deadly serious while his lips fought to maintain a relaxed half smile. “But, since you do walk home so often, I was wondering if you would be alright with my driving you home at night. It’s really not safe to walk by yourself. Especially at night.”

  “You’re obviously not from around here.” I scoffed. “There isn’t much crime in Burlington.” I purposefully forgot the night before for the duration of this conversation. No boogieman after me, no sir. I shrugged off his offer as I motioned to the two canisters we needed. He grabbed one in each hand before I could reach them. Nice.

  “Maybe so but that doesn’t make it safe for you to walk home alone. Just remember the offers open anytime. In fact, I would like it actually. Just think about it.” All I could do was sigh as I held the door open for

  him.

  As we were all closing up, Neesa pulled me aside to talk. “So what’s up with hottie boy starting here anyways?” Even after talking to him, I wasn’t sure of the answer. So I just shrugged.

  Neesa’s brow rose as she looked over at him from across the room. Let me tell you it was a strange sight to see a guy like him mopping a floor.

  “Did you know he only came in on nights you worked? Hm. Well anyways, momma said she could see you tomorrow. She’s closing the store so it will just be the three of us.” This was typically something that would excite Neesa to no end, so her timid smile made me nervous.

  “He- um- I mean, she really doesn’t have to close the store on my account. It’s not important really. I mean no offence, Nees but I don’t really believe in this stuff... all too much, anyways.”

  The look upon her face was riddled with fear and worry. Though she did her best to replace it quickly with a smile, it was so forced that it made her look queasy.

  “I will pick you up at nine, okay?” It was my turn to grimace. Of course I would be awake I just didn’t like going out so early. “Okay?” She pressed again.

  I gave a small smile of submission and nodded. I had the day off anyway. The comment about Damien was surprising but all I could do is store it away for later evaluation.

  As I was leaving Damien made another attempt at offering me a ride home. Declining, I shook my head and set off walking. As I was making my way around to the front, I heard our bar tender, John Reed speaking to him. “Forget her man, she ain’t worth the time. Trust me, that chick is psycho.” That was all I heard thankfully. As I walked, their voices faded to nothing.

  The walk home was eerily quiet with every store, restaurant and business closed at the late hour. The only lights were the streetlamps that blotted out the stars, leaving only the moon.

  I was left to walk in peace accompanied by only my thoughts. John was a jerk. I knew that. It still got to me. Most of my thoughts swirled him and our brief history. John had been working at Riads for a month. He was good but he was a prick who hated my guts as much as Carrie did. In light of no better phrase with my current mood, he’s a man-whore. But then again I was feeling bitter.

  Switch gears. Damien. Would he listen to John? Maybe. Did I want him to? Honestly, no. Why did I turn him down then? I’m not really shy at all even though I am kind of quiet. I liked him. But he worked with me. That’s a big rule- Don’t date a co-worker if you don’t want to work with an ex. Uhg. All of this was too frustrating. Next.

  Neesa was paranoid, weird and fruity. And as much as I loved her, I just couldn’t fall into believing all this hoodoo voodoo. She’d kill me if she heard me say that. Did I believe that about her? No. Did I believe her? No? Arg, next.

  Finals were in two weeks. Nothing too terrible. I’ve been a student at Champlain going on two years. Some semesters I went to the actual school for classes. I try to avoid it when possible. This year’s online education consists of the completion of my BA in Liberal arts. Study groups meeting online this week because Jenny has the flu. Computers don’t catch flu bugs. I thought about school the rest of walk home.

  Nothing happened on the walk home. I didn’t see a single car. Didn’t even see anyone I knew. No one bothered me or talked to me. Once home I didn’t waste a minute before flipping on all the lights and heading for my small pantry closet I used solely to store all my art supplies. My aversion to bright light was always put on the back burner when I worked on my art.

  Before long, all my furniture was pushed against the walls. Boxes of chalk scattered the floor around a mural sized canvas. My radio finally plugged back in, played Shaman’s Harvest loudly but not deafening as I sang off key to the words. I sat on my knees once again back in my usual night clothes of comfortable tank tops and Capri yoga pants, soon to be covered with smudges of chalk.

  Never were my hands so steady as when they held a brush, chalk, pencil or even a mound of raw clay. I worked until the dawn began to crack through the midnight darkness into a pale grey. Until my hands ached from holding the chalks just so, causing them to cramp. I wouldn’t stop until my body trembled from exhaustion and my knees were raw and stiff from kneeling for hours on the cold wooden floor.

  Hours had passed before I finally decided I was done. Not just physically but with the piece itself. Slowly pulling myself to my feet I left everything scattered as it lay, only to fall into my cool bed and into instant sleep. Instant hell.

  VI

  “WAKE TO A NEW WORLD”

  Neesa showed up at nine sharp the next morning. “Wow, Anna. I’m sorry but you really do look like hell in the mornings.” As she laughed I sneered at her comment before downing my Red Bull.

  “Now you know why I stay inside till ten most days.” I was dressed in a black shirt with white wings across the back shoulders and my favorite blue jeans all ripped up with a bleach stain on the right thigh. My hair pulled up into a tight sloppy half bun. Cute but spunky. So I knew it wasn’t how I was dressed but more the sullen look and blue bags under my eyes. Skipping makeup obviously had been the wrong choice. Oh well.

  “Doesn’t matter. Come on let’s get going. I have fresh blue berry muffins from Penny’s in the car for us and a super-sized hazelnut frappe with your name on it.” With a yawn of obedience I first walked to my fridge and grabbed two more Red Bulls, stashing one in my bag and popping the other open as I followed Neesa down stairs and out to her car. It was gone before I opened the passenger side door.

  * * * * *

  Only once before had I met Neesa’s mother, Adélia. Her skin was bronze and her eyes looked like that dark African rosewood with black and silver hair wound in big looping curls down to her tailbone. The subtle strands of silver looked as if a professional had strategically placed them to make her even more beautiful.

  If Neesa reminded me of a Gypsy from a fairy tale then her mother was one. She even dressed the part.

  In fact, she’s the one who started my interest in making jewelry the year before.

  The name of her store was Wildflower. For its kind, it was the biggest in th
e state. It was like a new age super market. There was everything from a candle making station to a stone room filled with almost every type of rock or gem known to man. Even raw diamonds.

  The book section was more or less a library for its vast selection. The jewelry section was as big as an upscale jewelry store and some of it was just as expensive. Of course, there were also herbs both fresh and dried. To the right there was a door leading to a health food market. It too was packed with vitamins and oils. In another section hung clothes, tapestries and art of every kind from little figurines to artfully crafted furniture.

  Basically if it was ever considered new age, hippy or somehow associated with craft work or whatever you so choose to call it, it could be found at Wildflower. She even had cauldrons. I didn’t ask about those.

  Aside from the fact it seemed awkward to have so much attention directed at me. This was the primary reason why I felt guilty for her closing the store. It was always busy when it was open. Closing it cost her money but there was no use in arguing now.

  As we pulled up to the Wildflower, Adélia was already waiting for us outside. Dressed much the same as when I last saw her, with a vanilla cream skirt flowing over her bare feel, a matching cream-colored top and a sheer ivory shall wrap around her shoulders. As before, she was covered in gold jewelry from her big golden hoops, her many necklaces to her fingers covered in

  beautiful golden rings. Her skin was a mirroring of her daughters. Caramel rich and dark. The only inkling of her age was her hair was showing brilliant silver locks mingled in with the ebony strands flowing to her hips.

  “Neesa,” she spoke her daughter’s name with so much reverence and love that it rang in an almost musical melody.

  “Momma.” Neesa seemed like an excited child as she hugged her mother fiercely. “Momma, you remember Lianna.”

  As their hug broke, Neesa’s mother turned and took me into her arms as warm as she would her daughter. “Of course. Lianna, it’s wonderful to see you again. Both of you please do come in.”

  Instead of pulling away, she wrapped an arm around both our shoulders as she ushered us inside the open door before turning from us to close and lock it. “It’s just us today. Please do realize this may very well take up most of your day, Lianna.”

  Mike had pulled me aside and asked me to work today but it wasn’t a big deal. We’d come to an agreement before I left Riads last night. I’d go into work whenever I was done here.

  “That’s alright.” My eyes roamed the store as she led us to a door in back. Music filtered through unseen speakers throughout the entire store. That calming whimsical type music of flutes and what sounded like a harp. Past it a hall, on either side down the hall were three doors. This part of the store I had not yet seen.

  Adélia had a set of keys I hadn’t noticed before, unlocking the first door before leading us to another and in turn unlocking it as well to lead us into an office. Aside from a usual desk-set equipped with computer and all, there was a couch, coffee table and two large chairs. The same music played in here as well but it was quieter.

  “Neesa has filled me in on your last reading. Just have a seat on the couch dear. Neesa child, be a blessing and bring us some tea.” I sat where I was told, balanced on just the edge of the couch.

  Neesa disappeared out of a different door while Adélia sat on the couch and turned toward me. Taking my hands in hers, she studied them as if they were a complicated map. She studied every pore from the back of my hand to the tips of my fingers and palms too. I didn’t know what to say so it was quiet until Neesa returned with a big silver tray loaded with a real silver tea set.

  “Your hands are quite cold.” Adélia commented as Neesa returned looking nervous and excited all at once. She set the tray down and curled up in a big wing back chair across from us.

  “Um, sorry. Must have been from holding the Frappe.”

  Adélia continued to turn my hands about in hers for a little while longer, in utter silence. After a moment, she shook her head and looked up at me, still holding my hands in hers but now it was a gesture of comfort.

  “I wish it would have been caused by that. My dear your coldness comes from inside. Now look up at me. Let me see your eyes.” Releasing my hands, she took a gentle hold on my chin as she looked into my eyes as if she were searching for something.

  As sweet and dreamlike as Adélia was in her Gypsy wonder, she made me strangely uncomfortable. It felt like I was being studied way too closely while being naked. It was difficult to have someone looking at you in such a way while you did your best to avoid eye contact.

  “Hm. You don’t meditate.” Obviously, she wasn’t asking. So I didn’t answer.

  “We’ll do a more thorough reading today but first some deep trance meditation so we can open you up. Usually for a beginner trance is difficult to achieve, you see. With proper care and guidance it shouldn’t be a problem though. You relax here and drink your tea. Neesa dear, will you help me prepare her room?”

  “Of course, momma.” They left together moments later, leaving me alone to my thoughts, which were definitely on edge.

  Trance? The only thing I knew about trance was the pictures of people in India with a musical instrument lulling a cobra and that stuff called trance techno. I had a feeling she meant something else entirely. I hoped.

  By the time I finished one cup of tea Neesa came into the room to get me. “Momma’s ready.” Following Neesa out into the hall to another room, she opened a door at the far end and ushered me inside.

  It was a small room with nothing but a big massage table covered in a very large white cloth. The room was painted a nice lavender and lining each wall, half way up was a long wide shelf fully loaded with white candles and small bowls burning homemade incense.

  On the bed lay a folded sheet and a dress lying across it. “Change into the dress and just put your clothes under the table. Momma will be back in just a moment. Oh and no bra either.”

  My brows rose when she shut the door. I was at a loss of what to think at all of this. The dress was a simple white knee-length spaghetti strap. After redressing as she instructed, I sat on the bed feeling like I was waiting in a doctor’s office. The table was softer though and not covered in cold paper.

  Not long later Adélia knocked on the door and came in. Hmm, just like doctors. “Wonderful, you are ready. Go ahead and lay down on your back.” She picked up the sheet as I laid back and slid it over me up to my neck once I was comfortable. “How’s the incense for you?”

  “It smells really good.” It wasn’t over bearing or overly fragrant or even very smoky.

  “Good. It’s sage and jasmine. They are my favorites,” as she spoke, she stood over me with a wooden bowl in one hand.

  “Science has proven that every stone in the world transmits energy from the universe. People know this because every stone puts out sonic vibrations. The intensity of these vibrations varies with each type of stone. I’m going to place special stones chosen just for you over your seven Chakras. Are you familiar with the Chakras?”

  I shrugged faintly. A knowing smile spread over her lips. “How did you know what stones to choose?” Skeptical yes but I was still curious about it all.

  “Neesa chose them not me. I simply cleansed them. I’ll explain as we go alright?” Holding up a stone in her fingers for me to see, I studied its magnificent coloring. It looked like a picture of a nebula I had seen in college for it was so filled with colors.

  “This stone is an Opal it intensifies emotions, power and luck. It also helps with purification of memory and astral projection. Often it is called the stone of happy dreams and changes. I will place this on the bed just above your head at the Crown chakra. It’s the seventh chakra and it is the center of spirituality, enlightenment, dynamic thought and energy. It allows for the inward flow of wisdom and brings the gift of cosmic consciousness.” She settled the stone on the table, above my head just against my hair.

  The next stone was quite true to its name
, black with white speckles that looked like large snowflakes. “This is snowflake obsidian. Mostly it is used for spiritual guidance.” Adélia paused as if pondering to what more she should say.

  “I will place this over your sixth chakra, over your third eye in the center of your forehead. This is the center for psychic ability, higher intuition and the energies of spirit and light. It also assists in the purification of negative tendencies and in the elimination of selfish attitudes. Through the power of the sixth chakra you can receive guidance plus channel and tune into your Higher Self.” Surprisingly the stone was quite cold. For some reason, I had expected them to be warm.

  “This one is hematite.” She showed me the third stone, simply black but quite shiny.

  “Most commonly it is used for grounding and spiritual growth. I will place this on your throat chakra at the base of your neck.” She did so as she spoke. It too was quite cool.

  “This chakra is the center of communication, sound and expression of creativity via thought, speech and writing. The possibility for change, transformation and healing are located here. The throat is where anger and discernment is stored.”

  “Next is mahogany obsidian. It helps eliminate energy blocks. I will place this on your heart charka. A place not only representing love but acceptance as well as self-control.” She placed the deep brick red stone swirled with black in the center of my chest.

  “Also you may like to know when the energy of your heart chakra, or your fourth chakra, is blocked it can cause great duress and severe insomnia.” Despite trying to remain still I flinched, sucking my bottom lip between my teeth lightly.

  “This is rhyolite. Representing change, variety, progress and helps you break through barriers of the mind. It can help you discover your self-potential and it is well known for being a stone of resolution. I shall place this on your third chakra known as the solar plexus. Representing intellect and self-confidence.” She laid the rusty red stone speckled with white and black just a couple of inches below the one before.