Nebula Nights: Love Among The Stars

by Melisse Aires

  I grab my tablet off the side table and Miko has written back to my message last night. It merely says, “See you there!”

  A message from Helena is right after Miko’s.

  “I hear you’ll be at the izakaya tonight for dinner. I wish I could come, but I can’t. Can you have lunch? We need to catch up.”

  Great idea, Helena. I respond to her and make plans to meet up for ramen back in Ku 5. My day is looking up.

  Chapter

  Fifteen

  When the ramen lands in front of me, steam curling from the lip of the heavy ceramic bowl, I take a moment to lean over and inhale a deep breath.

  “Mmmm, Sanaa-chan. This was an excellent idea. Itadakimasu!”

  We both grab our chopsticks and dive in. Hot, salty broth with a densely dotted oily sheen covers up long ramen noodles, dark green leafy vegetables, slices of carrots, and a few coins of fake fish cake rimmed in pink I always save for last. I like to savor ramen because I don’t get here often, so I grab my spoon and sip the soup for a bit before eating the noodles.

  “How did your place fare in the earthquake, Helena? Were your parents around?”

  “No. Well, my mother was home and sleeping but, oh Sanaa.” She sighs and slumps forward. “I was stupid and didn’t clean up after dinner, and all the plates bounced straight off the table and broke. Every single one of them. What a mess. We spent an hour cleaning it up. My father said two shelves collapsed at work, but that no one was hurt.” She shakes her head and sips her soup, drowning the greens in broth before lifting a hefty spoonful to her mouth.

  “You should have seen the river of water in my street. It was crazy — swept everything away.” I still can’t stop thinking about it. I’m so relieved I was in bed and not out. “I never want to see that again. Anyway, I’m sorry you can’t come tonight. You’ve been working a lot lately. I swear we’ve switched lives somehow.”

  “Well, I’ve decided to go for it, Sanaa. I’m moving to Ku 6… next week!”

  “No. That’s fabulous news, Helena. Omedetō.” I raise my water glass to her, and we clink and drink. It’s not sake but it’ll do for now. “Wow, next week. How did your parents take the news?”

  “Oh, you know them, always working. They don’t care.” Helena slurps up a long string of noodles and tries to look like she cares less than her parents, but it’s not fooling me. I reach across the table and squeeze her hand. “It’s okay, Sanaa-chan. Really. It’s better this way. And no birthday party until April. I’m too busy and Miko agreed we’d do it then.” Helena’s birthday is coming up fast, the eighteenth of March. Time is flying.

  “Whatever you’d like, Helena. So you’ve been working double shifts?” I ask, changing the conversation.

  “I’m working extra in Ku 4 to pay for the moving expenses. I’ve also been working with a massage group in Ku 6 that caters to the big families. I hope to get a permanent position at an onsen, but we’ll see.”

  The big families.

  My chopsticks are paused half-way to my mouth for ten whole seconds before I realize I’m staring at Helena like she’s grown three heads.

  “What, Sanaa?” She checks herself and over her shoulder.

  “I just… I just remembered something I forgot to do at work. Damn.” Onsens, massage parlors, tattoo parlors. All of these are places I should be watching, but I’ve been neglecting because I’m too afraid of the violence. But I always knew this day would come — the day when I was more intrigued by what I could be researching than my own fears.

  Suck it up, Sanaa.

  “Is it something you need to do right now? We can finish up quick and go, if you want.”

  I love Helena. She always puts everyone’s needs in front of her own.

  “No, no. I can do it tomorrow.” And I will do it tomorrow. No more tip-toeing around the job I need to be doing. Sakai is going to evaluate the data I’ve pulled and scold me again if I don’t follow all the players. I feel like he’s been going easy on me lately. I haven’t heard a peep from him about any of my research. I often wonder why I bother going to Ku 1 at all.

  Slurping up my noodles, I’m finally seeing the bottom of my bowl. “So, if you’re moving next week, have you already found an apartment?”

  Maybe I shouldn’t have asked Aunt Lomo to help me find a place. She’ll search Ku 9, but everyone I’ll want to hang out with will be in Ku 6. It’s not like I spend time in Ku 9 anymore anyway.

  “Yep. Actually, Yoichi’s family helped me get it. It’s down the street from where they all live. You know what? I think Miko’s going to marry that boy.” She smiles before breaking out in a laugh so sarcastic that it makes her eyes roll. “My gods, does he know what he’s getting into?”

  “Something tells me he does, and he can more than handle it.” All that’s left in my bowl are my two little fish cakes. I poke one a few times before popping it into my mouth. In my mind, I can picture Jiro’s smiling face at the okiya. “They’re a good match.”

  “What about you and Jiro?”

  I swear everyone can read my mind these days.

  “Miko says he’s been asking about you at Izakaya Tanaka,” Helena continues with a smile. “What you do at the Colonization division, what your aunts are like, what you were like in school…” She purses her lips and raises her eyes to the ceiling. “I think he quite likes you actually.”

  I reach out and hit her on the arm. “Stop it, Helena, you’re embarrassing me.” I’m laughing anyway. So I guess I’ve captured Jiro’s attention. Now I have to hold on with all my might.

  “Really, Sanaa, you went out with him two nights in a row, right?” I had sent Helena messages, but, apparently, Miko has been filling her in as well. “So make the move already. You’ve flirted on New Year’s Eve, been training with him — I still can’t believe you’re learning sword fighting — gone out with him twice… Just kiss him or something.”

  “Oh, Helena. You have no idea…” No idea how close I am to doing just that the next time I see him. I twirl my spoon around in my bowl as a blush starts on my neck.

  “What?” She eyes me and laughs. “You’re always cheering me on. I’m moving to Ku 6 because you finally pushed me to take control of my life. I want you to do the same.”

  “Thanks, Helena. I love you to pieces.” I always tell my friends I love them. Life is too short not to.

  Helena looks at the wall clock and sighs.

  “Sanaa-chan, I’m sorry, but I have to get back to work. Can we do this again soon?” Helena folds her napkin and puts it on the table.

  “Yes, and let me pay today. My treat. You save your money for moving.” I’m so glad I still get paid to do a job I no longer do. I have no idea where the money is coming from but my account gets an influx of cash every week. I take out my tablet, pair it up with the store’s computer, and pay.

  “Thanks, Sanaa-chan. You’re sweet. Meet you outside?” Helena grabs her bag and starts towards the front. The place is still crowded and the young boy who got us the table bows to Helena as she exits.

  I slip my tablet back into my bag, and, when I turn, I see him.

  It’s Matsuda.

  Seated at the far end of the noodle bar, he’s watching me. Without taking his eyes from me, he pushes his brown hair off his face, over to one ear, and… he smiles at me. But only his mouth is smiling. His eyes are narrowed and as cold as ever. I quickly glance behind me to see if his attention is on someone else, but when I turn back, his body is shaking silently with laughter. I just gave myself away. I’m not even going to guess as to how he knows who I am. He’s a part of Sakai’s world — was a part of my parents’ — and has probably seen me with Sakai or Jiro in Ku 6. He is following me like I follow him.

  Though I’m rationalizing his sudden appearance in my head, my hands are shaking. What do I do? Jiro has been teaching me offensive moves in sword fighting recently. Keep your opponents guessing what your next move is, he said to me yesterday. Don’t show them your fear. So instead of bolting from t
he ramen shop, I reach into my bag, grab my hair pin, and twist my hair up while maintaining eye contact with him. I don’t leave the table. I don’t flinch. It’s the hardest thing I have ever done.

  Matsuda picks up his chopsticks and taps on his bowl twice before running his hand through his hair and letting it fall across his face. He has looked away first. I win this round.

  I stride, not too quickly, past him to the front of the shop and meet Helena outside.

  “Let’s go, Helena. I’ll walk you to the train.” I grab her arm and pull her towards the transitway entrance before she can ask me anything else.

  * * * *

  It’s my day off, and I have six full hours to do whatever I want before meeting up with Jiro at the izakaya at seven o’clock, and what do I do? I leave Helena in the station in Ku 5 and take a train in the opposite direction straight for Ku 1. I set the computers a few days ago to track Matsuda’s money trail. Now I need to research where he’s been and if he’s been watching me for longer than today. The thought of this cold-blooded killer following me everywhere makes me sick to my stomach, but that’s the fear talking. Fear that I’m going to push aside because, little does Matsuda know, I have information on my side he does not.

  I scan my hand at theater 3B, and the door clicks open like it always does. Does no one else ever use this room? I’m not even going to bother checking the scheduling program because I bet Sakai has it blocked off as occupied indefinitely. It’s just the thing he would do.

  I sit down at the desk and immediately call up Matsuda’s bank account activity for the past few months. I don’t think I was on his radar before New Year’s Eve, so I concentrate on January, February, and March. Hmmm, this is going to take awhile. The man spends a ton of money, and I’m not surprised to find it’s mostly all in Ku 6. He sticks close to home.

  Maybe instead of starting at the beginning, I should work my way back in time from today. Since surveillance data is on a twenty-four-hour delay with my level of access, I’ll begin with yesterday. The cameras placed across the street from the Itōdōjō are a good place to start.

  Accessing the surveillance database, I find the video feeds based on the dōjō address. I scrub the video back in time and see myself enter the building approximately twenty-four hours ago. Where are the other cameras on the block? I find four more and add them to the video grid, synching them all up to the same time index.

  There I am again, and there! Dammit. Across the street is Matsuda. He is two buildings down and pressed against the wall of an alley. I never look that way because it’s the opposite direction of the transitway entrance. I only ever go straight to the dōjō and never spend any extra time exploring Ku 6. Matsuda must know that by now.

  I rewind the video. He purposely waits for me about twenty minutes before I even show up. Previous to that, he enters the alley from the rear. Curse me for always being on time and predictable. Does he follow me to Ku 1 as well? What about my home?

  My chest is getting fluttery, my heart malfunctioning, and it’s becoming hard to breathe. No, don’t panic, Sanaa. I hold all the cards here. He doesn’t know I can watch him. I take a deep breath, stand up, and bounce a little on my toes like I’m about to grab a sword and attack. I close my eyes and imagine standing by Jiro’s side, my feet soft upon the mats, my arms in front of me, my grip loose. The tension in my chest lessens, and my heart starts pumping.

  I’m ready to start digging. I rewind the dōjō camera over and over. Every day, Matsuda is waiting for me to enter and stays until I leave. The one day I fell asleep during practice and Jiro led me to the door (was that only four days ago?) Matsuda slinks back along the wall out of sight. He and Jiro know each other, and, based on this, I get the feeling Matsuda does not want Jiro to see him.

  Rewind, rewind, rewind. Wait! Suddenly he’s not there anymore. Before this trip to the dōjō,he wasn’t following me. Now, what spurred him to start? When I count the number of minutes it takes me to walk from the transitway entrance to the dōjō, it’s a whopping three in total. Three minutes on the street is not a long time to catch someone’s attention especially since I walk fast and keep my head down.

  But the day Matsuda first sees me was not a normal day. It was the time we all went to Ku 10 together. On the video, Sakai and I walk leisurely to the dōjō after exiting the station. We were having some random conversation about Yoichi and Miko’s matchmaker because Sakai had mentioned his mother was a clan match. I don’t even remember what he said, but we both laugh and across the street, from the other camera angle, Matsuda stops in his tracks, frozen in place, his eyes trained on us both.

  He stares with his mouth open before backing up in the alley he always watches me from now. He runs his hand through his hair and shakes his head. He reaches back into his bag he has slung across his shoulder and takes out his tablet, typing on it with one hand while watching the dōjō door. His knuckles clutching the tablet whiten, and I’m pretty sure he’s swearing, but I’ve never been good at reading lips. Still, he keeps his cool and waits in the shadows until Sakai, Jiro, and I emerge from the building again.

  How did none of us see him? Oh, maybe it’s because I’m talking and flirting with Jiro, and Sakai is following us and smiling. We are all so oblivious it makes me laugh.

  So, what have I learned here besides the fact that love makes me blind? Matsuda sees me with Sakai and Jiro, and what? Does he know who I am? Does he know what I do? Why does he care?

  I rewind the video and pause it on the first time he saw me. That look of shock on his face is there for a reason. Sitting back in the chair and pulling my legs up to my chest, I rest my chin on my knees and think.

  Matsuda, why are you so surprised to see me there?

  Chapter

  Sixteen

  At seven o’clock, I meet up with Miko, Yoichi, and Jiro at the izakaya. After spending hours in Ku 1, I ran home, showered, and changed into my black pants and shirt. I dug through my closet until I found my haori coat I’ve been saving for a special occasion. It’s black and green with a large orange koi fish along the bottom back. Helena always threatens to steal it from me whenever I wear it. That Helena needs to find a nice Japanese boy already. I’m willing to bet she meets someone soon after she moves.

  Instead of leaving my hair down, I twisted it into a knot at the base of my neck and slipped in a silver comb that was my mother’s. I even put on makeup again, and I think I did a better job of it this time. At least, I hope so. Aunt Lomo was not at home to smooth it out and tell me it looks okay.

  I have another grand entrance at Izakaya Tanaka and turn to the booths to find Jiro laughing and shaking his head. That will never get old. Yoichi is at the bar with Miko sitting next to him. She’s examining something on her tablet when she waves me over.

  “Miko-chan, ogenki desu ka?” I lean in, and we give each other a kiss on the cheek.

  “Genki genki! You look hot, Sanaa-chan.” She pulls back so she can scan me from top to bottom.

  “Thanks, Miko. Hi, Yoichi. It’s good to see you again.”

  “Sanaa,” he says with a smile and a nod, but nothing more. I need to get to know him better soon.

  “The izakaya looks to be in one piece,” I say, taking in the bar and tables surrounding us. “Didn’t lose anything in the quake?”

  “Just one maneki-neko, unfortunately.” Miko pouts. She loves those cats. “And some stock fell over in the back, but this is a good solid building. It has always held up during quakes.”

  The building has been in her family for so long this is not the first earthquake it’s lived through under their ownership.

  “Yoichi is quickly helping me with some financial stuff, but we’ll come over and sit down with you two for dinner in about fifteen minutes. I ordered up food for us already.”

  “What’s good tonight?” I ask with a smile.

  “Sushi. Kagetora is on duty tonight.”

  “Fantastic.” I squeeze her arm, nod and smile at Yoichi, and walk to Jiro’s
table.

  I should not be this happy. I just spent the afternoon watching video of Matsuda who has been following me, but I can’t wipe the smile off my face. Jiro is gorgeous again in black. He’s formidable in a way that makes all the blood pool right between my legs. He stands up when I reach the table.

  “Konbanwa, Sanaa. Suware na?” He gestures to the seat on the inside of the booth between him and the wall, and I move past him and sit down. Mmmm, I love it when he uses the more masculine Japanese. I’ve never dated a Japanese man before and hearing him speak makes me swoon. I am stupidly love sick.

  “How are you, Jiro? It was strange not having our usual practice session this afternoon.” I actually missed it despite asking for the day off. I would have much rather have been with him than spending the afternoon in Ku 1 unexpectedly.

  “It was strange. I didn’t know what to do with myself. And I’m fine… happy,” he says, smiling at me.

  I remember how we left things two nights ago after the okiya and how determined I am to grab him for myself. Being forward with him is the only way to do this.

  I reach over and slide my hand easily into his. “Me too.”

  There are those first few seconds when you’re staring at someone you want to kiss and think it’s going happen, and you lean in a little and smile… But then a waiter comes by with a bottle of sake and ruins it. The carafe hits the table with a thump and knocks me straight out of the moment.

  Seriously, that was uncalled for.

  Jiro clears his throat, and I blush so badly I think my face will melt off.

  “Sake, Sanaa?” He doesn’t even wait for my response, just pours.

  “Yes, absolutely.” I squeeze his hand. “That waiter has the worst timing ever.”

  Jiro laughs, leans in, and kisses me on the neck again, right below my ear, and his head and mine are so close together I close my eyes and rest my cheek on his. It causes a long sigh to exit my body. My shoulders drop and my cheek sinks deeper against his. I want to move my head and kiss him now, but the waiter is back to give us appetizers. I’m afraid to open my eyes and see who it is. I don’t need the further blushes it will bring to my face.