The Education of Sebastian

by Jane Harvey-Berrick

  As I snuggled up to him, I felt something dig into my hip.

  I pulled out the packet of condoms that had gone AWOL, and held it up.

  “Look what I found.”

  Sebastian’s eyes opened sleepily. “What? Are you kidding? Oh well, that was pretty fucking amazing anyway.” He laughed in astonishment. “I mean, just fucking sensational!” Then he paused, “but keep that packet where we can find it.”

  Now it was my turn to be amazed. “You want more?!”

  His voice was suddenly serious, all humor gone.

  “It could be weeks, months even before I get to spend the whole night with you again, Caro. Whereas that fucking asshole...”

  I held my finger over his mouth then kissed him. “But tonight is still ours.”

  And I didn’t want to waste the hours by uttering David’s name.

  As dawn began to leak through the darkness, Sebastian slept. His head rested on my chest and his arms and legs were wrapped around me. I could feel his warm breath on my skin as my fingers rhythmically stroked his back.

  It was a peaceful moment tinged with sadness for me. I didn’t want it to be over, but with each minute the dark faded and I knew it was time to go.

  I’d never known a night like it; I’d never known it could be that way. I finally understood what my dear papa had tried to tell me when I’d announced that I was marrying David.

  “You’re so young, mia cara, you have so much life ahead of you. You don’t have to decide now. See a little of the world first.”

  Of course I hadn’t listened. Children never listen to their parents, do they? Not about life; not about love… or what I’d thought was love.

  “Sebastian,” I whispered, rubbing his arm. “We have to go.”

  He mumbled something and tightened his grip. His reaction made me smile.

  “Come on. Wake up.”

  “I am awake,” he said, and to make his point he took my nipple in his mouth and tugged gently.

  I swatted his shoulder even as my body shuddered with desire.

  “Stop it! We have to go.”

  “Yep, I’m ready,” he said, pushing his growing erection into my hip.

  Good God! He really was insatiable; I’d always thought that must be a myth. I was very grateful that David had always been easily appeased. The thought spoiled my good mood.

  “No, it’s time to go,” I said, feeling grumpy and, weirdly, turned on at the same time.

  Sebastian sighed. “We’re out of condoms anyway,” he said sadly.

  We got through a whole box of condoms? No wonder my legs felt like I’d never be able to cross them again. Yes, well used – that was the sensation. I wondered idly if Sebastian felt the same. I didn’t know: could men be sore from, um, extended usage?

  I was about to ask him when I realized the sky was lighter with pink streaks glowing in the east. I sat up in a panic, looking around for my clothes; I had to get back before David woke up.

  “What’s the matter?” said Sebastian, sitting up, frowning.

  “I really have to go!” I hissed, feeling angry and tearful at the same time.

  “Caro!” Sebastian tried to capture my hand.

  “No! What part of that don’t you understand?” I snapped.

  He didn’t reply but his hurt expression said it all. He stood up and pulled on his jeans and sweatshirt in silence, then shook the sand off the blanket and folded it under his arm.

  I’d found my dress, which looked more like a rag than anything else, but my bra was missing in action. The panties, well, I assumed they were still somewhere on the floor of the Hunters’ car.

  I stepped into the dress and almost jumped when I felt Sebastian’s hands on my spine, pulling up the zip. He kissed my neck quickly and held out his hand.

  I took it, feeling rather ashamed of my outburst, but too anxious to apologize.

  When we reached the car, I fished out my panties from under the driver’s seat, shyly stepped into them and wriggled them up my hips. Sebastian was gentleman enough to turn his back during this awkward procedure. How ridiculous of me, after everything we’d done several times last night and twice this morning.

  Sebastian drove barefoot, but I tried to brush sand off my feet and push them into my pumps. The sky grew lighter each minute and I was terrified that someone would see me get out of the Hunters’ car or, worse still, that David would be awake and waiting for me.

  Sebastian pulled up outside the house and gave my hand a quick squeeze. “Text me later? Let me know you’re alright?”

  I nodded and pulled my hand away.

  I stumbled up the driveway and crept around to the back of the house, peeking in through the window. I breathed a sigh of relief: David was still asleep on the couch and snoring loudly.

  I took off my pumps and tiptoed through backdoor, feeling all colors of guilty, but oddly exultant at the same time.

  In the bedroom, everything was as I’d left it; a lipstick on the dressing table and a comb abandoned by David’s side of the bed, which hadn’t been slept in.

  It was nearly 7 AM and although my body ached for sleep, and really just ached from using muscles that had never before seen the light of day, I ignored the bed and headed for the bathroom. I badly needed to pee. Sebastian had had no qualms about wandering off into the dunes during the night to relieve himself, but I hadn’t quite been able to be that free with him. Luckily I hadn’t drunk much during the evening, so I’d been able to hold on.

  I showered quickly, enjoying the hot water on my skin, and washed off the last of the sand that had managed to work itself into a number of interesting crevices.

  I wondered if Sebastian’s parents would comment on his absence – or the fact that the car had been missing all night. But then again, the state they’d been in when he’d taken them home, I doubted they would have noticed much at all. I hoped that was the case.

  As I dressed, pulling on a pair of jeans and old shirt, I heard David stirring next door. I didn’t know how I was going to do this: to go on deceiving him, to carry on living the lie. I wondered again if I could contemplate the alternative, or could I weather the next four months.

  I took a deep breath and walked into the living room. David peered at me through bleary eyes, grunted and rolled into a sitting position.

  “Coffee?” I said, a little too brightly.

  He eyed me suspiciously. “Where have you been?”

  “Showering,” I said breezily.

  My hands shook slightly as I put the water on to boil.

  “Bacon? Pancakes?”

  From the corner of my eye I saw David pull a face and he didn’t reply. I couldn’t help feeling a sharp sense of satisfaction that he was suffering with a hangover. If things ran true to form, he’d spend the rest of the day in his study.

  I hoped Sebastian would be able to get a couple of hours sleep: he started his new job today. It was only bussing tables at a country club outside of La Jolla, but it would keep him out of his parents’ way and meant he’d eventually have enough money to buy a car – especially if tips kept up, as Ches had promised.

  I had the interesting task of cleaning the house and erasing the evidence of occupation so it would pass David’s undoubtedly close inspection later on.

  The day dragged almost unbearably: the only bright side was that David stayed out of my way. I managed to send Sebastian a quick text halfway through the morning. David was in the shower and I was vacuuming his study. I had just a few minutes.

  * I’m ok. Hope all good with you? *

  I waited anxiously for his reply but my cell stayed ominously silent. When I heard David dressing in the bedroom, I turned it off.

  Throughout the day, I checked it intermittently, my anxiety increasing with every hour that passed. I finally got a reply late in the evening.

  * Sorry, baby. Got called in to start work early.

  Weird place! Tomorrow? Please say yes. *

  He called me ‘baby’!

  I wondere
d why the place was weird. Yes, tomorrow. God, that seemed a long time from now.

  I felt better after reading his message and was sad that I had to delete it immediately. But my sense of well-being evaporated when it was time to go to bed… to bed with my husband.

  I was reading a book: well, I was trying to concentrate but the words swam in front of my eyes. I switched off the light and turned on my side, hoping this would protect me. My breathing was shallow and I tried to slow it down to appear as if I were really resting. I felt the bed shift and I couldn’t help holding my breath. David leaned over and ran his hand over my hip.

  “Not tonight, David,” I said, trying to speak naturally. “I’m tired: last night was very late.”

  Especially for me.

  “You’re not menstruating: what’s wrong with you?”

  “Nothing. I’m just tired.”

  “Hmm.”

  He didn’t say anything else but rolled back to his side of the bed. I breathed out slowly. Soon he was snoring, but it was much later when I was able to relax enough to sleep.

  I was awake before the alarm: occasionally David liked to be jerked off before breakfast and I wanted to avoid that particular scenario.

  I made sure his uniform was laid out, coffee was waiting, bacon and pancakes delivered with military precision on a hot, fucking plate.

  But it wasn’t enough to earn as much as a ‘good morning’; he was making it very easy for me to leave him.

  As soon as he was out of the house, I texted Sebastian.

  * Meet you at the park – 30 minutes? *

  He texted back seconds later.

  * Not soon enough but I’ll be there *

  My heart lightened immediately.

  I ran into the bedroom and dug out the knee-length floaty skirt and strappy top that I’d planned to wear. I’d shoved my hair into a pony-tail before breakfast, but now I shook it out and brushed it vigorously. I’d noticed that Sebastian liked to run his hands through it when we made love.

  I didn’t bother with colored lipstick, just a little gloss, as I wasn’t planning on wearing it for long. Just thinking about kissing Sebastian made my heart race… and other things. Yes, I definitely felt a little moist – best to concentrate on finding sandals that matched.

  He was waiting for me. I’d barely stopped the car before he was opening the door and climbing in, a huge smile on his face.

  “Hi!”

  His eyes glowed with love and something darker. He took my breath away.

  “Hi!” I grinned back at him. “So, where do you want to go?”

  I pulled out into the road, happiness flooding through me.

  “I don’t care. Anywhere, as long as it’s with you.”

  “Shall we go to our coffee shop in Little Italy?”

  He raised his eyebrows. “That’s a bit public for what I had in mind.”

  “Which is?” I said, innocently.

  He smiled wickedly and without speaking leaned across to bury his head in my lap, biting me softly through the thin material of my skirt and running his hands along my bare legs and up to my panties.

  “Sebastian! I’ll crash!” I whimpered.

  He let his fingers stray a little further and I gasped. Then he sat up slowly, leaving my skirt bunched up around the tops of my thighs.

  My breathing had accelerated and my hands were clenched into fists on the steering wheel.

  “That was really stupid and reckless!” I said, my voice shaking. “I could have had an accident.”

  “You were fine,” he said arrogantly.

  I shook my head, really rather angry with him.

  He just grinned.

  Two could play at that game.

  I stopped the car, letting it rest at a crazy angle, half-on and half-off the curb. I got out, standing with my hands on my hips.

  “Caro?”

  He looked at me anxiously then came and stood next to me, worried that he’d really upset me.

  I passed him the keys.

  “You drive.”

  “Okay,” he said softly, still concerned.

  Without speaking, we got back into the car and he pulled away from the curb. I let him drive a short distance before I reached over and squeezed his balls, hard.

  The car swerved across the lane and the truck behind honked loudly.

  “Fuck!”

  “Not so easy to concentrate, is it?” I said.

  I’d just contributed an important lesson to his portfolio of life skills, and safety while driving. They should cover it in Drivers’ Ed.

  Sebastian glanced at me then, as we passed a weed-covered, overgrown and empty lot, he pulled over suddenly.

  He cut the engine and the sudden silence whispered out between us.

  I felt a tremor of apprehension: I had no idea what he was going to do.

  “I have a whole box of condoms.”

  His voice was quiet but his eyes were blazing. I think my mouth dropped open. Another whole box? Wow!

  Two long seconds ticked by as we stared at each other. I don’t know who moved first, but suddenly we were tearing at each other’s clothes.

  “Back seat!” I gasped.

  I clambered over the seats and felt him bite my ass through my panties. Then he forced me down onto the seat, tugging his T-shirt over his head. I ran my hands greedily over his chest and stomach, then pushed my right hand into his jeans pocket and pulled out the condom packet. It was still wrapped in cellophane so I used my teeth to rip it open. It exploded apart and condoms showered down around us.

  Sebastian caught one and kneeled up, tearing the foil. I yanked down his zipper.

  “Ow! Careful, Caro!”

  “Sorry,” I breathed. “Let me kiss it better.”

  There wasn’t much room to maneuver in the backseat but I managed to take him briefly in my mouth before he pulled back and shook his head.

  “Caro, I’ll come in about three seconds if you do that – and I want to be inside you.”

  “Okay, but let me have a go with the condom; you have all the fun.”

  He stared at me as if he couldn’t believe what I’d said, but passed me the little piece of latex. I pinched the nipple like I’d seen him do and then carefully rolled it all the way down to the hilt. It didn’t seem to want to stay in place so I tried tugging it.

  Sebastian pushed my hands away, groaning loudly.

  “Fuck, Caro!”

  The slippery little sucker wouldn’t stay put but Sebastian eventually wrestled it into submission, pulling it down. Seeing him touch himself like that drove me crazy.

  His eyes were wild as I grabbed his jeans and dragged them down, running my hands over his firm ass-cheeks.

  He groaned louder then clawed at my panties, tugging them roughly down my legs. They were still hooked over one sandal, waving like the flag of a defeated army when he plunged into me.

  He buried his head in my neck and I clutched him inside and out.

  “Ssh, Sebastian. Let me feel all of you.”

  He drew back slowly and I clenched tightly, making him moan again.

  “Yes, like that,” I breathed, running my nails over his back.

  Twice more he moved inside me slowly, luxuriously, letting me enjoy the delicious sensation, watching my face as I gazed at his. Then he squeezed his eyes shut.

  “I can’t! I can’t!” he moaned. “Please, Caro!”

  Without waiting for my reply he started pounding into me. I felt his whole body stiffen suddenly and he cried out softly.

  For a second I felt his full, crushing weight, then he propped himself up on his elbows and kissed me deeply, lovingly.

  I stroked the short, soft bristles at the back of his head then ran my hands down the length of his spine.

  “Sorry,” he said, at last, looking shamefaced.

  “What for?” I was genuinely confused.

  “Well, mostly because I wanted that to last longer for you… but for nearly making you crash, too. Although you got your own back
.”

  I smiled up at him. “Consider it a life lesson, Sebastian.”

  He kissed me again. “I like your lessons, ma’am.”

  “Don’t call me ‘ma’am’,” I grumbled at him. “That makes me feel even older.”

  He silenced me with another kiss then pulled out carefully.

  His face was suddenly chalky under his tan.

  “What?” I said, struggling to sit up.

  “I can’t find the condom!” he said, gazing at me in panic.

  “What do you mean you can’t find it?”

  “I mean… it’s not here!”

  He pointed to his erection which was still very worth looking at. But he was right: no condom.

  “It must have come off when you pulled out,” I said, not feeling too worried yet.

  “I think… I think it must be still inside you!” he said, shock and horror mingling on his face.

  Oh, for fuck’s sake, what?

  “Just… just close your eyes, Sebastian,” I ordered.

  “What? Why?”

  “Just do it!”

  I wasn’t going to go ferreting around up there with him watching. But search as I might, I couldn’t find anything that felt rubbery.

  My cheeks must have been a brilliant, flaming red.

  “I think I’m going to need the ladies room,” I muttered quietly.

  “Do you want me to…?” he offered.

  “No!” I said quickly.

  But I couldn’t help a small laugh escaping.

  “What?” he said, half-relieved, half-puzzled.

  “We never seem to get a break, do we?” I sighed.

  He pulled a face, twisting his mouth into the semblance of a smile. “Other than meeting you in the first place: not really, no.”

  He finished buttoning up his jeans and gallantly passed me my panties.

  “Thanks,” I said, a wry expression on my face.

  “At your service,” he said, trying to stifle a smile.

  At this point I decided I was going to have to start taking the contraceptive pill: I couldn’t afford anymore fuck-ups, so to speak.

  Sebastian drove a couple of miles down the road and we found a mall that had a restroom.

  “Are you sure you don’t want any help with the… um… situation?” he said, a salacious gleam in his eye.

  “No, thank you,” I said primly.