I press send and hit DELETE ACCOUNT in the subscription settings.
Like that, my venture into online dating is gone. I can only hope that the drama that has been going along with it makes an exit as well. The only thing I have left to do is send Wesley a long Dear John email, because after everything that has happened, there is just no way I would be able to see him again. We both really threw caution to the wind that night. But I just can’t live with the thought of what I did.
Yes, it was freeing to be such a slut. But on the other hand, the way I felt after the fact took away the power and high that I got from just saying fuck it for a couple hours of my life.
Wesley,
I hope all is well with you. Life has been nothing short of crazy for me this week.
I never wanted to send this email, but I think it is something we have been both expecting since our
dinner date. While I don’t regret the choices we made, or the brief fling we shared, I don’t feel as
though we will ever be able to build a real relationship from a dinner and a cheap fuck in a public
bathroom. I hate to sound crass, but honesty is the best policy.
You are a very charming man and any woman who does win your heart will be very lucky. I
know this for a fact. I do hope you find the one.
Xoxo
Aurora
I don’t want to say goodbye to Wesley, because in all honesty he is sexy as sin. But, it will be better off in the long run of things. Better off for me and him. Most of all… better off for Liam. I have to keep telling myself the whole dating thing is just different when you have children. Not only that but I have to focus on moving… not looking for a happily ever after. I will get it if it is really in the cards for me. But I need to stop searching for it.
Isn’t that what they say? Your happily ever after will come when you are least expecting it.
As I closed my eyes, I could hear my phone buzzing on the nightstand. Instead of the typical one buzz of a text message, it kept going off. I open my eyes, and look at the nightstand to see Jackson’s name flash on the screen of my phone. It is late and he is calling, but I don’t want to ignore him. I want to talk to him because despite the craziness of the day, I have continued to think of him in the back of my mind all day long. Through the craziness I now call my life.
“Hello?” I say in my sleepy tone. A couple minutes later and I would have been in a deep sleep and he would have completely missed me.
“Hey, I know it is late but I wanted to talk to you before I fell asleep. I crawled in my bed and it smelt like you.” I can’t help but smile hearing his sweet words.
“Aww, well aren’t you sweet?” I giggle into the phone. The flirty nature of the conversation easily flows. Just like most of our interactions.
“When do I get to see you again?” Jackson asks me, and I honestly have no idea.
“Well, I am meeting with Chris McKenzie for a tour of the house and to sign the lease tomorrow. Speaking of that house, what kind of favor did you call in on my behalf? You know you really shouldn’t have done that.” I can’t help but smile into the darkness while I lay here and talk to him.
“Oh it wasn’t a big deal. I've been doing his lawn for years. I just told him I would give him two months free. I kinda did it for selfish reasons anyway.” He lets out a deep boom of laughter that sends goosebumps all over my body.
“Selfish reasons huh?”
“Well, there is the fact that you will live on the same street as me. That is kind of a huge plus for me.” He admits. I only hope that it ends up truly being a good thing, and not the worst mistake I’ve ever made.
“We’ll have to see where this all goes…” I trail off.
“Oh, Aurora. I have nothing but high hopes for us.” And instead of feeling put off or worried, I feel at peace with his words. Excited about the possibilities. Just like I once felt with Colin so many years ago. But I won’t get my hopes up, not just yet. This damn day has been an emotional roller coaster.
“I kind of wish I was there with you,” before I realize what I am saying the damage is done already. I want to be honest, just not that open.
“I can’t think of anything else I would want right this minute. I know I was a gentleman, but I would do just about anything to get you back in my bed, Aurora.” I let out an uncomfortable giggle. I was drunk, and he was exactly how I wanted him to be after the shit show of a day I had… a gentleman.
“Maybe we can arrange that again next weekend. Depending on how my move goes.”
“Well, we can get you all moved in a day. I’ll just get a couple of my guys to help. Just let me know what day and we will make it happen. I want this move to be easy on you. You’ve gone through enough bullshit.” Could he be anymore damn perfect?
“Wouldn’t that be too much? I mean, your guys have to work and stuff.”
“It wouldn’t be a problem at all. Just let me know what day, and we will get it all done, Aurora. It isn’t a big deal.”
“I’m gonna go to sleep, I’m so tired,” I say, as a big yawn interrupts me. “I will be at the other house at noon tomorrow with Chris if you have some time to come by. If not we will make a plan for another time during the week, okay?”
“I will try and make it over there. See you tomorrow.”
Monday morning flew by in the blink of an eye. Between catching up on work and bringing Liam to pre-school, it was noon before I knew it. As I pull into the driveway of my brand new rental, my pulse doubles and I have to physically restrain myself from getting out of the car and jumping up and down in the driveway. I am just so damn excited.
This house was just something I always wanted. The red brick exterior with the bright white shutters were only the tip of my dream house iceberg. Then there was the same wrap around porch Jackson had. The same porch I was so damn jealous of two nights ago.
“You must be Aurora?” I hear a male’s voice, and for a second I am scared. The paranoia that has been following me since the break in just downright sucks. As I turn around, I see an older gentleman with graying hair and thick black rimmed glasses.
“That would be me.” I reply with a smile, trying to shake off the uneasy feeling I had a moment ago.
“Nice to meet you! I’m Chris McKenzie, ready to take a look inside?” he extends his arm and shakes my hand in friendly greeting. His shake isn’t intimidating, and if anything I feel a little bit better about walking thru the empty house with no one else around. There isn’t anything intimidating about him.
As we start walking up the stone walkway, I hear the rumble of a truck pull up the drive way, and when I turn to see who is there, Jackson is smiling from ear-to-ear in the drivers seat. I can’t help but return his smile. Just seeing him like that makes my heart jump into overtime and my entire being smile. It is a refreshing feeling.
“I guess Jackson could make it.” I say, and Chris smiles.
“He’s a good man,” he adds before making his way to the truck to greet Jackson.
“Y’all could have started without me.” Jackson laughs as he makes his way to the spot I am still standing in on the stone pathway. Half way to the front door, in between a sea of expertly manicured thick green grass.
“Oh we weren’t waiting for you,” I sass him and continue the walk to the spacious porch. It could use some touching up on the paint, but other than that it is absolutely beautiful. Chris pulls his keys out of his pocket and unlocks the empty house. The door opens into a extremely spacious foyer, complete with a deep brown hard wood flooring. To the right is a formal living room which could also double as a much needed office, and to the left is a dining room.
The state of the art kitchen is all brand new, stainless steal appliances fill the space, accented by black granite counter tops and a traditional southern designed white cabinets. Everything I’ve dreamed of when it comes to a kitchen. Hell, I would have picked out the cabinets and counter tops myself if I had designed the space!
“I think she likes it,” I hear Jackson say to Chris as I continue to wander through the home. Exploring all the ins and outs of the place I can only hope I can call my own by the end of the hour.
The family room is large, with more than enough room for all of our furniture as well as Liam’s toys. French doors lead out into a giant backyard, but the one thing that catches my attention was something I had no idea even existed; a pool. In a large fenced in area sits an in ground swimming pool.
“Don’t worry about pool maintenance, we have someone who comes to tend it once a week. The most you will have to do is maybe skim out some leaves or bugs, but no big work.” Chris says as he makes his way across the house to where I am standing.
“How many bedrooms are there?” I ask, wondering because I haven’t even thought about asking before I looked into moving here.
“There are four. There is a guest bedroom down the hallway to the right at the bottom of the stairs, then there are three upstairs. Two full bathrooms, and a half bath as well.” Chris says without missing a beat. This house is just way too big for Liam and I. It is only the two of us. What the hell do we need four bedrooms for?
“Wow, that is a little big for us.” I say, but continue to explore around the house because no matter how big it is… I am already in love with almost everything about the first floor of the house. I don’t think I could walk away if I tried.
“The master bathroom is my favorite, Aurora.” Chris says as we all begin to climb the hardwood staircase. I peak into each room on the second floor, only coming to a stop when I reach the master bedroom. The closet is the size of the master bathroom in my condo, there is a balcony that overlooks the pool in the backyard, and when I saw the door for the master bathroom I am like a little kid in a candy store. Bolting across the room and swinging the door open to see what will probably become my new relaxing oasis.
The bathroom is to die for. A stand up shower, a huge garden bathtub, full with massaging jets. I could lay in that tub for days on end. I know that already.
“I’ll leave y’all to talk about it. I’ll be out in the truck making a couple phone calls and gathering the paperwork together.” Chris says, as he starts to make his way to the stairs. I was completely oblivious to him and Jackson until he just spoke.
As I turn around Jackson is standing in the doorway of the bathroom just watching me. I smile at him but before I can say anything, he speaks.
“You look beautiful today.” I can’t help but blush from his comment. It feels like so long since a man has made me feel this way. It isn’t just about a sexual connection because it is clear whatever we are building together is way more than that.
“Why thank you Jackson. You don’t look half bad yourself. I love the dirty, hard working man look.” I laugh, but it is true. Something about a man who gets all dirty and sweaty is just a turn on to me. You can keep those guys who sit behind a desk and weigh three hundred pounds a couple years into their career. I’ve always wanted men who just… work hard. Maybe it is sexy because it is clear how hard they work? I have no idea, but for me those are the kinda guys I want.
And right now. Even though Chris is waiting downstairs. I want Jackson.
“When can I take you out again?” he asks me, taking a step forward and closing the bathroom door behind himself.
“Maybe I can arrange something after I move,” I flirt with him, taking a couple steps across the bathroom towards him. “Why’d ya close the door?” I ask, already knowing the answer to the question.
“Maybe I just wanted a couple minutes of privacy with you?” he says. I nervously start to fidget with the hem of my dress. I really just want him to push me up against the wall and take me, but he is just too much of a gentleman to even consider it. But, the way his eyes are burning into me, I can only assume he is starting to lose control like I am.
“I think I like how that sounds,” I reply, and wrap my arms around his middle, pulling him closer before looking up into his eyes. He is considerably taller than me, probably a full foot. But it doesn’t bother me at all. I can feel his taunt abs underneath the thin tank top he has on and I want to run my fingers over his bare skin.
“How long do you think we have before Chris comes looking for us to sign the lease? I mean, you are going to sign it right?” he questions me, I know he is nervous. Almost as nervous as I am about moving so close to him. It almost automatically sends out relationship onto the next level, but I don’t think I really mind.
“I am going to sign it. I would be stupid not to. Look at this place…” I motion around the lush bathroom alone and all I can think about it laying in the tub and soaking after a long day of chasing Liam around and sitting on my fat ass on the computer working. “Oh, and to answer your other question, I say ten minutes, tops.” I laugh at the fact that we are kind of sneaking around like teenagers waiting to be caught by their parents.
“I think I can get the job done in ten minutes,” Jackson winks at me as the words leave his mouth. Before I know it his lips meet mine in a passionate kiss that I have been aching for since I left his house the previous morning. I regretted being such a lady with him. My indiscretions with Wesley playing on repeat in the back of my mind. But everything with Jackson was worlds different. With him it was right. It wasn’t dirty, even if we were sneaking around from his client, and my future landlord.
His lips are soft and sweet. Stubble from his beard scratches the skin on my face, but god it feels so good. My lips part on their own, without even thinking about allowing him entrance to my mouth. My body’s reaction is just natural. Never forced. No need to think about what is happening. Reason tries to rear her ugly head and I quickly tell her to shhhh just let it happen. No matter what the damn cost may be. Yes, I fucked up in the past, but this was my time to make shit different finally.
I let out a quiet throaty moan as we continue to kiss and his response is a carnal growl. I want to giggle at the fact that I am bringing the caveman out of him in the locked bathroom of a rental I haven’t even signed the lease for yet, but I just can’t help myself.
His hand pushes my dress up my thigh as I hook my leg around his hip. In one short movement, my back is pressed up against the cool tile wall sending a shiver down my spine. I wish I could tell you if it was from the cold, or the sheer excitement coursing through my body. His touch lights me on fire as his fingertips inch higher and higher until they are tugging on the hem of my panties. He pulls his mouth away from mine, only for a split second to question me.
“This okay?”
I can only moan in response and take his mouth again. Being the aggressor this time. But it doesn’t last long because we fight for power. Back and forth our mouthes try and claim who is the one in charge. My hands snake up his shirt, rubbing along his ridged abs before they make their way down to work the button on his pants.
“You sure, Aurora? You want our first time to be like this?” he snaps me back to reality and all I can think about is how much of a cheap whore I was after one date with Wesley. That one fuck up will follow me around for the rest of my life. But right now, it is so fresh in my mind.
“Shit, I’m sorry. I just… got carried away.” I say. It is the truth because I am desperate to finally have a taste of this man.
“I’m sorry, Aurora. I just didn’t want our first time to be so… rushed.” He steps back and starts to fix his pants as I pull my dress down, and locate my soaked panties somewhere on the bathroom floor. At this point, there is no point in even putting them back on.
Instead of tossing them in my purse, I walk over to Jackson and wrap my arms around his body, quickly sliding the blue silk thong into his pocket without him even realizing what I am doing. He will be in for one hell of a surprise when he goes to fish his cell phone out of his pocket later. I chuckle to myself silently as we both turn for the door and head downstairs so I can take care of all this lease business.
I, Aurora Alexander am going to be renting my dream house. And I can’t wait to
scream about it from the roof tops!
A week, two trips in a moving van and about sixty boxes later, I am all moved into my new rental. And by ‘moved in’, I mean living in the house with various boxes half unpacked all over both floors of the house. The only room in the entire house that looked showroom perfect is Liam’s and that is because Colin and Jillian came over to help me. Talk about an awkward situation, but if there is one thing the past couple weeks of my life has taught me, it is that life brings changes and the impact they have on your life will only come from your own reaction.
I could have been a bitch and told Colin I didn’t want him or her around my son anymore. But, I took the high road no matter how hard it was. And let me tell you, it sucked balls seeing them all cutesy together hanging curtains for our son. But, seeing the genuine relationship Jillian and Liam already have built helped to reassure me that maybe Colin would actually get things right this time and not fuck up the life of another woman and child. I have high hopes.
Jackson popped in and out to help when Liam was at school, careful to never be at the house when he was home. Only because of my own personal request. Things are still too new between us and I want to really err on the side of caution with our relationship and Liam. Especially since his father hasn’t been the most considerate parent in that aspect of things. I am planning on having Jackson spend the night at my house this evening though, because Liam went camping for the weekend with Colin and they aren’t going to be back until Wednesday.
I wonder if it was a real father-son bonding trip, or if Colin was being considerate for once seeing how stressed out I was with the whole process of moving. Either way I was appreciative because this would finally give Jackson and I some alone time together.
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