‘Haven't you even told your mother or Lily?’ Victoria's eyes widened as the words sunk in.
‘No, I will, but I wanted to hug it to myself for a while.’ Alice laughed. ‘It sounds stupid, but I didn't realise I was pregnant. It was Mrs Headley who told me, and the doctor confirmed it a couple of days later.’
‘Mrs Headley?’ Molly arched her eyebrows.
‘Eat your cake.’ Alice laughed. ‘It's a long story, but she delivered a letter from Freddie and guessed I was pregnant, mainly due to my sickness and lack of appetite.’
Molly stabbed at her cake. ‘I can't believe it. Have you told Freddie?’
Alice shook her head. ‘No, I haven't told anyone.’
‘Oh yes, you said.’ Molly put the fork laden with cake into her mouth. She momentarily closed her eyes, before putting her hand in front of her mouth. ‘Mmm, this is delicious, so light and chocolatey.’ She opened her eyes and lowered her hand, before continuing to eat the sponge.
Victoria smiled at Molly before turning to Alice. ‘I assume you’re going to let Freddie know.’
Alice shrugged her shoulders. ‘To be honest, I can't decide.’
‘What?’ the girls responded in unison.
Alice shook her head. ‘I don't want him to have the distraction of worrying about me and a baby. It's more important his thoughts are about surviving and coming home safe.’
Molly shrugged her shoulders, before tilting her head to one side. ‘I can see what you are saying, but don't you think he has a right to know?’
Alice sighed. ‘Obviously, and in normal circumstances I’d be shouting it from the roof tops, but I want him to come home; that's more important.’
‘I can see both sides of the argument and it's a difficult decision to make.’ Victoria picked up the teapot and poured the hot amber liquid into a silver tea strainer, which she rested on each cup in turn. ‘You can add your own milk and sugar.’ She put the heavy pot down on the iron stand and sat the strainer on a small silver dish.
Alice added a splash of milk to her tea. ‘I beg you not to say anything to anyone until I’ve decided, one way or another.’ She passed the jug to Molly.
‘Your secret is safe with us, isn't it, Vicky’
Victoria raised her eyebrows. Molly laughed as she shook her head. ‘It is. Not a word of it will pass my lips, that is until you say I can, and then I’ll tell everyone.’
Molly looked from one to the other of her friends. ‘Look at us all growing up. Does it scare you, Alice?’
‘It did at first. I was plagued with thoughts of being on my own with a child.’ Alice frowned. ‘But there are lots of women in that situation, with several children, and they had theirs before war was even mentioned.’
Molly nodded. ‘That's true; this war has torn families apart, and none of us chose it.’
Victoria looked at them both, her eyes glistening and her fork poised in mid-air. ‘You have to live your life. In my experience, you never know when everything is going to be ripped away from you.’
‘That's very true.’ The girls spoke as one.
Victoria gave them both a watery smile. ‘It's exciting news, Alice, and it’ll certainly give us something else to focus on. I wonder if it’ll be a girl or a boy?’
‘I hope it's a girl.’ Molly laughed. ‘I don't want boys.’
Alice laughed. ‘I don't think you have any say in it. You get what you get.’
Victoria giggled. ‘Yes, you can't send it back you know.’
‘I know. I'm just saying I’d prefer a girl. What about you, Alice?’
‘I really don't mind, as long as everything’s all right.’ Alice sighed. ‘It’ll be a part of Freddie that I’ll always have, no matter what.’
The girls nodded and each placed a piece of cake on their forks.
‘Anyway.’ A sheepish look crept across Molly's face. ‘While we are confessing all, I’ve a secret to tell.’
There was a clatter of forks hitting the tea plates, the cake momentarily forgotten.
‘What?’ the girls chorused.
‘Please don't tell us you’re expecting a baby too,’ Victoria said with a laugh.
Molly's bottom lip jutted out for a moment. ‘I don't know what sort of girl you think I am, Victoria Appleton, but as I said to you once before, I'm not that sort.’
The girls laughed at her indignation.
‘Victoria's only playing. Come on then, share your news; it's all very exciting.’
Molly frowned at Alice. ‘I hope you think so when you find out.’
‘You make it sound very intriguing.’ Victoria picked up her cup and sipped the strong dark brown liquid, before carefully replacing it on the matching saucer.
‘Alice, I'm telling you in a public place, so you can't be too mad with me.’
‘Come on, spill it. It can't be that bad.’ Alice wondered what it could be that had Molly so concerned.
Molly took a deep breath. ‘Since your wedding, I’ve been writing to Charles.’ Her words tumbled over each other, in their bid to escape.
Victoria smiled. ‘Is that it? That's a lovely thing to do. I thought it was going to be something terrible.’
‘I must admit that so did I,’ Alice laughed. ‘You did give it quite a build-up.’
Molly picked up her cup. ‘I thought you'd be cross. I know how protective you are of Charles,’ she mumbled into her tea, before taking a sip.
Alice pushed the plate aside, the cake hardly touched. ‘Molly, you and Victoria are like my family. I’m not going to be cross because you’re writing to him.’
Molly smiled. ‘We chatted quite a lot at the wedding…’
Victoria laughed. ‘I noticed you two were getting cosy at Russell Square.’
Molly gave Victoria a scathing look, before continuing. ‘Anyway, he asked me to write to him and I said I would.’
Alice nodded. ‘That's good, it'll help remind him of home.’ She hesitated, but decided not to mention that she already knew because Freddie had told her in his letter. ‘Make sure you don't tell him he's going to be an uncle, because he'll tell Freddie.’
‘I won't. That’s your news to tell, when you see fit.’ Molly looked at Alice's plate. ‘Are you going to eat that cake?’
Alice laughed. ‘No, you can have it.’
‘It's a shame to waste it.’ Molly picked up the plate and placed it in front of her, on top of her empty one. ‘So, Victoria,’ Molly spoke slowly, giving great emphasis to the name. ‘While secrets are being told, do you have any you want to share?’
‘No.’ The answer came quickly.
Molly looked at Alice, then back at Victoria. ‘That was a very quick answer. Too quick, I'd say.’
‘No, I don't have any secrets. None.’ Victoria looked down at the remains of her cake.
Alice smiled. ‘Who was it that said “thou doth protest too much”, or something like that?’
Molly shrugged her shoulders and yawned, letting Alice know this wasn't the subject under discussion. ‘Who cares? I want to know Victoria's secret.’
Victoria sighed. ‘Neither of you will like it.’
‘Ah, so there is a secret. I knew it.’ Molly nodded with satisfaction.
‘All right, Sherlock, but just for the record, you didn't know, you guessed.’ Victoria gave Molly a scathing look.
‘I don't care about that. I was right, and that's all that matters.’ Molly beamed at Victoria.
‘Anyway,’ Alice interrupted. ‘What are you doing that’s so bad, you think we aren't going to like it?’
Victoria coughed to clear her throat. Her whole mouth was parched. She picked up her cup and emptied the contents, hoping it would give her the courage to face their disapproval. The chink as she placed the cup back on its saucer was lost in the lively café. She took a deep breath, but didn't look up. ‘I’m writing to Ted Marsden.’
‘Isn't that the little scumbag that ran out on you when you needed him most?’ Molly's words burst out, her cheeks turning crimson.
It was Alice's turn to raise her hand, to stop Molly from talking. ‘How long have you been writing to him?’
Victoria looked sheepishly from one to the other, before looking back down at her plate. ‘Since that first letter I opened in church,’ she whispered. ‘Molly, he regrets running away. He begged for my forgiveness. He joined the army, so he has been at the front since day one.’
Molly sat open-mouthed, staring at Victoria. ‘Well, you’ve managed to do what many have tried and failed to do, make me speechless.’
‘Well now, that is a good thing.’ Alice laughed, letting her smile gradually fade away.
‘To be honest, I think the first letter was because he thought he might not make it back home and wanted forgiveness for letting me down. I never mentioned it, because it was obvious both of you wouldn’t approve and, if I'm being honest, I wanted to write to him.’
Alice reached over and rested her hand on Victoria's. ‘You shouldn't worry about what others think. You’ve to do what's right for you, and you alone.’
Victoria closed her eyes for a moment. ‘Apparently, he ran because he was scared and didn't know how to deal with the death of my parents, let alone handle the thought of taking on two young people as well.’
Molly nodded. ‘I suppose that’s understandable.’
Victoria glanced at Molly through watery eyes. ‘If my letters can help him to survive, isn't that a good thing?’
‘Of course it is.’ Molly sighed. ‘What concerns me is that you still love him and I don't want him hurting you all over again.’
Alice nodded. ‘I must admit, I do agree with Molly, but you clearly want to give it another chance so, as your friends, we should support you. We will, won't we, Molly?’
‘That goes without saying.’ Molly closed her eyes for a moment, before looking at Victoria. ‘I know neither of you had any time for Tony, but I was smitten and you both allowed me to be. Deep down, I knew I was never going to be his wife.’ She looked across at Alice. ‘I know he fancied you.’
Alice opened her mouth to speak, but Molly held up her hand again.
‘It wasn't your fault, Alice. I know you never encouraged him. Blimey, you were too busy being smitten with Freddie, but my point is that you allowed it and accepted you’d be there when it all fell apart, which it was always doomed to do.’ Molly continued, ‘What I'm trying to say is, in my own clumsy fashion, if it's what you want Victoria, we’ll all be there for you. Make no mistake.’
Alice shook her head. ‘I couldn't have said it better myself.’ She lowered her eyes, hoping Victoria wasn’t reopening old wounds.
Chapter 16
June 1915
The clicking of knitting needles stopped. Sarah frowned as she looked down at the pattern she was trying to follow; she should have stuck to socks. Humming quietly to the Irving Berlin record playing on the gramophone, she looked across the sitting room at Alice, her pale features concentrating as her needles moved back and forth. ‘You’ve got quicker at knitting. I think I'm the opposite.’ Sarah folded the wool around the needles and laid it on her lap. ‘Lily works at quite a speed too.’
Alice laughed, not taking her eyes off the wool wrapped around her fingers and the needles moving in and out of each stitch. ‘I don't think you’ve got slower, Mother. It's because you’ve decided to try and knit something more complicated than a pair of socks.’
Sarah smiled at her daughter's concentration. ‘Hmm, maybe I got too ambitious with it.’ She glanced down at her pattern again.
Alice pushed her stitches further down and poked the needles into the ball of wool, before laying them on the small table next to her. ‘Perhaps you should try knitting booties.’
‘Hmm.’ Sarah carried on studying the pattern abbreviations. ‘Why would I do that?’
Alice patiently watched her mother, waiting for the penny to drop. She couldn't resist a smile when her mother's head suddenly jerked up.
‘Ohhh, ohhh, ohhh, my goodness.’ Sarah's jaw dropped, her eyes wide as they focussed on Alice. ‘Are you saying what I think you are saying?’
Alice laughed. ‘That depends on what you think I am saying.’ She couldn't resist a little tease. ‘If you think I'm saying I’m expecting your grandchild at the end of the summer, then yes, I’m saying what you think I’m saying.’ Her lasts words were drowned out by Sarah's laughter.
‘What's going on in here?’ Lily walked into the sitting room, carrying her police hat under her arm. The navy jacket to her uniform was unbuttoned, revealing her white shirt, navy blue tie and the top of her blue calf length skirt. She was grinning from ear to ear. ‘There’s an unusual amount of laughter coming from you, Mother.’
‘It's wonderful, wonderful news. Your sister’s expecting a baby.’ Sarah jumped up and wrapped her arms around Alice. ‘Isn't it wonderful, Lily? There’s going to be a baby in the house.’
Lily laughed as her eyes followed her mother, who was bouncing around the room.
Sarah's eyes sparkled as she clapped her hands together. ‘I can't believe it. It’ll be lovely to hear a baby again, but hopefully not too much crying.’ She beamed.
Alice watched her mother's excitement growing, fearing she’d burst at any moment.
Sarah bounced from one foot to the other, before hugging herself tight. Her fingers disappeared into the soft folds of her silk blouse. ‘Oh Alice, there’s nothing better than a child gurgling and laughing, let alone the smell of talcum powder.’
Lily laughed as she walked over to Alice and gave her sister a squeeze. ‘Congratulations to you and Freddie.’ She paused for a second as the news sunk in. ‘Oh goodness, I’ve just realised I'm going to be an aunt.’ She smiled at Alice. ‘Does that mean I now have to become more responsible?’
Alice chuckled at her sister. ‘Lily, you do know you are standing in the sitting room, dressed in a policewoman's uniform?’ She grinned as her sister looked down towards her feet. ‘I don't think you can become any more responsible than that.’
‘I guess you’re right. Somehow, when I wasn't looking, I became respectable.’
‘Lily, you are funny.’ Alice laughed. ‘You were always respectable, it's just that now you’ve something to focus on.’
‘Who's got something to focus on?’ Luke's deep voice resonated around the room.
Sarah turned to face him. Her smile faded. ‘Sorry, I didn't hear the front door.’
Luke frowned. ‘That is hardly surprising with the racket you three are making in here.’
Alice stood up. ‘It's not a racket, Father, it's called laughter. That’s something we used to do a lot when we were children, do you remember?’
Luke stared hard at his eldest daughter, wondering what had happened to bring out a side of her he had never seen before. He always expected backchat from Lily, but Alice…
‘Sorry, Luke.’ Sarah took a deep breath and shook her head at Lily, before grabbing Alice's hand. ‘But Alice has some wonderful news for us.’
‘Yes, Father.’ Lily stared hard at him, daring him to give them a difficult time for laughing. ‘We’re just happy and excited.’ He glared at the three of them in turn, but they each held their position. ‘We don't have much to be happy about these days, so we have to make the most of any good news we may get.’
Alice smiled at Lily's words, so reminiscent of Molly's.
Luke walked over to the sideboard with the silver tray sitting on it. Turning over a small crystal tumbler, he pulled the stopper from the glass decanter. In his haste, the lid chinked against the top. He poured himself a whisky, gulping it down without a backward glance.
‘Sit down, Alice,’ Lily whispered, pulling a chair close, to sit down next to her. She placed her hand on her arm. ‘Have you told Freddie yet? Is he pleased?’
Alice looked across at her father, with his back to the room. He stood rigid, in the same brown suit he wore every day. She wondered if he had a wardrobe full of identical suits. His dark hair was longer than usual, curling over the edge
of his collar. Heat began to rise in her face. She searched the caverns of her mind, trying to understand why he hadn't asked what the news was, why there was no interest at all, but there was nothing. She jutted out her chin and clenched her fists.
‘Alice.’ Lily nudged her. ‘Is Freddie pleased with the news?’ Clenching her jaw, she followed her eye line. ‘Alice?’
Alice took a deep breath, turning her head to face her sister. ‘I haven't told him yet.’
‘Why not?’ Sarah whispered.
Alice's lips lifted at one of the corners. ‘I just want him to concentrate on staying safe. I don't want him to have any distractions.’ She closed her eyes for a moment. Freddie was there, enveloping her in a bear hug. The tears were like pins pricking the back of her eyelids. There was no doubt he’d worry about her. No, she was certain, the news had to wait. She opened her eyes, stunned to see nothing had changed. Her father hadn't even turned to face the room.
Sarah nodded.
Lily shrugged her shoulders. ‘I can see what you’re saying, but it might keep him going, give him something to look forward to.’
A humourless laugh escaped from Alice, the fun of her announcement long gone. ‘I hope having me waiting for him will be incentive enough.’
‘Of course, I didn't mean—’
‘I know, Lily, I'm sorry.’ Alice gave Lily a watery smile. ‘I've decided not to tell him until he comes home.’
Lily nodded.
‘For that reason, you can't tell Charles or Robert either. I'm sorry.’
Sarah and Lily nodded as one.
‘Well, we’ve a lot to do before the baby arrives, so that’ll keep us busy.’ Sarah smiled at Alice. ‘Everything will be all right, you'll see.’
*
The Gentlemen's Club was as lively as ever; the war hadn't taken away the men's need to relax and unwind. It was predominantly filled with older men, with most youngsters having enlisted as officers, fighting for their king and country. The talk was of money being made, as women took over jobs for less pay. Some had talked of their shock at how hard the women worked, and how capable they were. The savvy businessmen among them had been happy for their factories to be converted into controlled establishments, making guns, wagons and shells for the war. Luke shook his head. He had been slow on the uptake. With the right premises and investment, he could have made a pretty penny out of the war. He shouldn't have stayed so long in Sandringham, allowing family issues to fill his thoughts.
The Foyles Bookshop Girls Page 19
