Safari Moon

by Rogue Phoenix Press

  “You asked me here,” she reminded him.

  “Stop changing the subject.”

  “I’m trying to put everything in perspective.”

  Perspective? Since she kissed him nothing was in perspective. “All right then. Let's put things in perspective.”

  “Your grandfather doesn’t think I’m good enough for you.” She told him, but the light in her eyes reminded him of the kiss. The kiss that left him panting for air and as hot as a torch. They’d gone full circle again and he forced his mind back to her words--words which were true. Colonel St. John had never thought highly of Nyssa.

  Solo didn’t like arguing with Nyssa. He never got anywhere with her. They went round and round until neither of them could remember the original argument. No matter what he said, his grandfather was the problem, not her lack of clothing. “I’m sorry, Nyssa. He’s here and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how long he’ll stay or where he expects to sleep.”

  He held her hand and dropped a quick kiss on the back. It was strange how he couldn’t keep his hands off her, how he didn’t want to try. Now that he’d had her in his arms, he wanted her there again. It wasn’t rational. Nyssa was his best friend, he trusted her, told her everything. She knew his sins, his weakness and his strengths. She knew that watching the sunset on the Pacific made him feel sentimental and at times brought moisture to his eyes.

  In return, he knew she liked nothing better than to curl up with cup of hot cocoa and a book on a cold winter’s day. And when she watched the snow fall it reminded her of a fairy tale her mother used to read her.

  He’d always admired and respected her, and he'd always been attracted to her. But he'd never had the inclination to strip her naked and make love to her. “What are we going to do?”

  “Your grandfather has to stop the pictures from surfacing. You owe me this.”

  “I know,” he said.

  But he wasn’t thinking about the pictures or his grandfather as he started through the door. He was still trying to deal with the conflicting emotions he felt toward Nyssa.

  He was not himself. Or either that Nyssa had changed so dramatically in the last few months she wasn’t herself.

  Nyssa was safe. He wasn't supposed to feel hot and out-of-control when he looked at her. This was Nyssa, serious, dependable, and predictable. But he couldn't forget the feel of her in his arms, the taste of her mouth when he kissed her, could not rid himself of those sensations no matter how hard he tried.

  Remember, he chided himself, there were lots of women but only one Nyssa. Only one woman he could call friend. If he let their relationship change, he’d lose the best thing that had ever happened to him. No matter what, he wasn’t about to kiss her again. Damn temptation. This wasn’t about sex. It was about a relationship, a friendship worth keeping.

  When he returned to the room, the Colonel had moved to the window, and was rocking back on his heels as he stared out. His grandfather must have heard his footsteps because he turned, his expression sober, the lines around his mouth grim.

  “I can’t stop the pictures.”

  He must have thought about what had been set in motion. Nyssa Harrington was and had always been the last female the Colonel would have chosen for Solo. Now, if the picture appeared there would have to be explanations, including the ones to his grandmother. If anything would hurt Sarah, a scandal would.

  “You could stop them if you wanted.”

  Colonel St. John merely shook his head. “You overestimate my power. Oh, I don’t argue the fact that I could stop them from appearing in any of the papers I own, but not the rest. There are men out there who would love to see me fall down a few pegs. And I don’t blame them. I’ve always played by the rules, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t stepped on a few toes along the way. ”

  “You expect me to believe you?” With increasing desperation, he glared at the Colonel as he stood, implacable, near the door. “How dare you pretend innocence. Your want ad started all this.”

  “I had your grandmother’s interest at heart. She’d like a grandchild, soon. I admit I’ve pressured you for an heir but this time it’s for Sarah.”

  “And you wouldn’t.” Solo regarded his grandfather with a stunned expression.

  “True, but if I wasn’t concerned about Sarah, I would not go to such great lengths. Tell me, didn’t you find at least one of them to your liking?”

  “What do you think?”

  “I think you found them cheap and insincere,” Colonel St. John laughed. “But then you’d know. You’ve had a great deal of experience with trashy, shallow woman.”

  “Not really,” Solo muttered under his breath. “That didn’t give you the right to throw them at me.” Solo paced and tried to think, knowing full-well his grandfather was up to something. If he wasn’t wary, he’d be caught in the trap being drawn around him.

  “I couldn’t think of any other way to shake you out of the complacency you’d fallen into. There is, you know, more to life than work--and Nyssa.”

  “Leave her out of this and don’t make excuses for your behavior. You were wrong. Your attitude toward Nyssa is unbearable and down right degrading. I won’t have her slandered.”

  “You can’t talk to me that way. I brought you up. Saw to your education.” The Colonel’s tone held a hint of anger.

  “Nyssa comes first and if it means telling you the truth about yourself, it’s about time someone had the nerve to do it.”

  “I would do anything for your grandmother’s happiness, even hand pick a new Mrs. Solo St. John. If your grandmother wants a grandchild, I’ll stop at nothing to see she has one.” Colonel St. John gave Solo an impervious glare

  “Your grandmother may not have long to live.”

  Colonel St. John turned his back on him for a few seconds.

  Solo stood there too surprised to speak.

  When the Colonel turned back to the room, his face was paler than Solo had ever seen and it seemed as if his grandfather had aged at least ten years in the few minutes that just passed.

  “What’s wrong with her?”

  “The doctors don’t know. They’re performing tests.”

  “But I talked to her a few days ago. She sounded fine and she didn’t mention that anything was wrong.”

  “She puts on a brave front. She doesn’t want you to worry.”

  “Is it cancer?”

  “We just got back from a clinic and no--at least they can’t find a tumor. They can’t find anything wrong with her. Nothing.”

  “Well, why the hell not?”

  A clinic. He’d thought his grandfather merely pulled a disappearing act, and they’d been at a clinic.

  “She doesn’t have the will to live. A grandchild would change that. A wife for you then maybe she’d get better.”

  Solo became very quiet, pensive. There was so much to think over, so much to decide. He wouldn’t mind giving his grandmother a grandchild but he’d have to find a wife first.

  He didn’t want her to die. And he understood his grandfather’s inability to give up. Somehow, he knew if he were in the same position, he would do everything humanly possible to save the life of the woman he loved. Including the drastic lengths Colonel St. John had gone to. He felt instantly selfish.

  “Solo,” the old man cleared his throat. “I know I’ve behaved badly. Forget everything. I’ll go home to Sarah and tell her you still don’t have anyone.”

  “You sure she’s going to die. Have you gone everywhere--tried everything?”

  “It’s useless. She grows more despondent every day.”

  “But--”

  “Wasn’t one of those girls suitable?”

  Colonel St. John looked like he’d reached the end of the line. Then the Colonel turned so his back was to him again.

  “They all giggled. Not one of them had a brain.”

  Colonel St. John looked back at him hopefully. The silence clung to Solo while he battled his grandfather. It was not the way he’d though
t this day would turn out.

  There was only one option left. Without a break in his stride, Solo St. John barged through the door to Nyssa’s room.

  “You have to marry me.”

  Chapter Five

  “I’m going for a walk,” Nyssa muttered under her breath.

  Solo St. John had gone certifiably crazy, either that or he was out to give the Colonel a heart attack. The last choice she didn’t believe for a minute, because Solo had always been solicitous to his grandfather’s feelings.

  She wished she’d given in to her first inclination to listen at the door. It would help to know what brought this sudden, inexplicable proposal, a proposal Solo was sure to regret as soon as he had time to think.

  Never mind that she had wanted to hear those words since the first second she saw him sauntering into the campus library. Never mind that until this instant, he’d never thought of her as anything but a pal.

  “You can’t. It’s dark outside and colder than a witch’s--never mind. Besides, you haven’t answered my question.”

  Solo sounded infuriatingly calm, sounded as if he asked women, engaged women, to marry him everyday.

  “I thought you were joking.”

  “Ah, Nyssa. Would I joke about something as serious as marriage?” His voice was flat, devoid of humor.

  Solo’s hands were stuffed in his pockets, but even in the dim light of the room she could see the balled fists through the fabric. His eyes focused on her, giving nothing away, not one hint of his feelings.

  “No. Until this minute, I didn’t think you would joke about marriage.” She rubbed her hands down the length of her arms in an effort to warm herself. The room temperature dropping to frigid as Solo continued the dark brooding silence.

  “I’m not joking Nyssa. I need a wife. ASAP.”

  “A wife of convenience?”

  “Whatever.”

  Whatever. He’d turned his back on her and to her fragile ego. It seemed he could not bear to look at her.

  “I won’t do it.” She told him trying her best to relax and look at all this from his perspective. Which was hard because his question had shocked her senseless.

  “I don’t deserve you, Nyssa. But God knows I need you.”

  “We’ve been through all that before and your need doesn’t entail marriage.”

  “You don’t understand.”

  “Try me.”

  He looked tormented, his eyes sad, his features withdrawn. He looked as if someone had dropped the weight of the world on his shoulders. She didn’t know what to say. True, she wanted to know what had brought all this on, but she didn’t think anything Solo could say would help.

  “It’s grandmother. The Colonel says she’s dying. They don’t know what’s wrong with her.”

  For a second she thought she’d heard wrong, but the look in Solo’s eyes told her the truth. On the other hand, she wouldn’t put it past Colonel St. John to pull an underhanded trick on Solo and lie to him. If he’d meant to push Solo into marriage, his plan backfired. The last person on earth Solo’s grandfather would want him marrying was her. In all the years she’d known Solo’s grandparents, Colonel St. John had never said one nice thing about her.

  “I believe him.” Solo’s voice was a haunted whisper.

  Nyssa’s stomach clenched into tiny knots at that statement. Solo knew her well enough to read her mind, and he knew she wouldn’t let him down. But he was wrong on that score. Not for Solo, not even for the man she’d loved for ten years would she succumb to this blatant travesty of a marriage proposal. Let him use one of his willing, eager and able lady friends because she was engaged to gentle, kind, perfect Robert.

  “I don’t believe the Colonel for one instant.” Yet she had her doubts. Sarah and the Colonel were both in their early seventies. Things happened.

  Nyssa dropped to the bed. Sarah St. John? Impossible. The last time she’d seen her, she was vibrant, glowing with life and the will to live. Sara was the only person she could confide in. She loved Sarah.

  She tried to speak. The sound came out as little puffs of air until she started to cry. Solo was beside her then, his arms around her, cradling her. He stroked her hair, calming her until she stopped.

  Swamped with guilt, Nyssa wiped the tears from her eyes. This wasn’t at all right. She should be the one comforting Solo, yet she didn’t have the strength. Through everything, the Colonel’s stoic dislike of her, Solo’s indifference and other less noteworthy incidents, Sarah had boosted her confidence. Sarah had been there for her with understanding and warmth when she'd fled home from New York with tears in her eyes and a sense of failure in her heart.

  “I’m sorry.” Her hands trembled as she pushed her unruly hair from her eyes then shrugged out of his arms.

  “I am, too.”

  “It explains a great deal doesn’t it?”

  He nodded. “He wasn’t going to mention it, but he had to. That picture of us together will hit the newsstand and Robert won’t be the only one to see it.”

  “Sarah?”

  “Yes. You do know what she’ll think?”

  “You could call her with the truth. It would do her more harm to find out after she saw the picture that it meant nothing.”

  “She needs hope, something to hang onto. She’s wanted a grandchild for so long now.”

  “Suddenly you’ve got the urge to procreate and I’m the only woman for miles around.”

  “It’s not like that.”

  At least he had the good grace to color slightly.

  “Nyssa,” he murmured, in that sweet convincing tone he always used when he needed a favor. He sat down beside her, traced the top of her hands with his finger. “We could pretend.” He gave her that helpless look he did so well. “Until she snapped out of whatever has got her upset. She’s always liked you.”

  “I can’t lie to her. When it all explodes in her face, she'll be devastated and so will I. It’s better to tell her the truth now.” She pulled her hands from his.

  But he took them back. The warmth surrounding them, the need she felt for him, tempted her. Oh, God it did tempt. “We can figure something out.”

  “I don’t want to figure anything out. In case you’ve forgotten about Robert, I haven’t. It’s going to be hard enough to explain the picture that will surface in the tabloids, let alone a wedding.”

  “Listen--”

  “No. Your grandfather will veto this before the wedding gets off the ground. Remember--he doesn’t think I’m good enough for you. Even if I was stupid enough to go along with this hair-brained scheme of yours, he’d never allow it. Never.” Solo grimaced and she added, “Sorry, but it’s the truth.”

  “We’ll see about that. I’ll make sure he understands this is temporary.” He let out a long agonizing sigh.

  Nyssa felt her heart rip apart. She lifted her hand from his and touched his cheek. He looked so desperate.

  “We’ve had several adventures, but Solo this isn’t going to become one more. I can’t go through with a marriage like this even for Sarah. It goes against everything I believe in. You’ve been such a good friend to me and--”