by Lila Lacroix
“So,” Ryan said, when they were left alone, waiting for their food. “Do you like your job at the hospital?”
Grateful for the chance to talk about something that she loved, Tina told him about the horrible exams, how she had longed to go back to the hospital where she'd done her residency, and the children that she loved to work alongside. When their food arrived, she had realized she had been talking for a while and flushed, looking down at her plate. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to talk for so long.”
Ryan shrugged. “If I didn't want to hear, I wouldn't have asked.”
“Still,” Tina said. After a pause, she admitted,” I didn't call the last time because I felt so awful about what I had done.” When Ryan looked at her strangely, she shook her head. “I mean, I thought you were a new father! Here you were, having sex with me, when your wife was delivering a few floors down!”
Bursting out laughing, Ryan rubbed a hand over his face. “I didn't even think about how it must have looked from your side! I was doing my sister a favor, and then met you. It was so obvious to me that she was my sister that it didn't occur to me how it must look!”
Tina grinned, feeling herself relax a little. “That’s why I threw out the phone number. I mean, I thought you were a new dad, I thought you were a scumbag, really.”
Ryan leaned forward a little against the table, his eyes going a little softer. At least, Tina hoped that wasn't her imagination or a trick of the light. “So you aren't nervous?”
“Maybe at the start,” Tina admitted. “But it always takes me a while to get used to dates.”
Ryan looked surprised by that, but thankfully didn't say anything. Tina didn't want to have to go into her dating history, thankfully because it was bad form, but also because she didn't want to put in his mind that she was flighty. She was all in where it mattered, it had just taken her a long time to want to date again.
“I don't think that anymore, if it helps,” Tina put in.
Ryan laughed, sitting back in his chair. “That's good.”
Tina had chosen a light pasta meal. She wasn't watching her figure, she went to the gym enough and made sure she usually ate healthy so she didn’t have to worry about a night out here and there, but she knew she was working the next day, and eating a heavy meal the night before a morning shift had never done her any favors before. Ryan was eating his steak, and though they exchanged a few more words, for the most part they were silent while they ate. She had worried beforehand that there would be awkward silences she would be desperate to fill, but thankfully that wasn't the case. Everything felt comfortable and easy, and she was surprised how much fun she was actually having. Being with Ryan was definitely better than any of her previous partners, including Andrew, and she was confident things would only get better between them – providing that Ryan actually wanted things to continue between them.
Trying not to think too much about that, she focused on finishing her food, and asking Ryan's questions. She learned that he was pretty work-conscious, and had donated to the hospital because of the way they had dealt with his sister. Tina told him about her mother, and her best friend, and also that she quite liked her job and wanted to stay there as long as possible.
“I love children,” Tina said, wistfully. “Someday I think I want them.”
She held her breath, knowing that most guys would take a comment like that wrongly on the first date, but thankfully Ryan seemed amenable. He gave her a knowing smile, and nodded.
“I would too, someday.” He picked at the little food left on his plate. “I think I'd like to wait a few years, but if one came along, I wouldn't be upset at all.”
That was more honest than Tina had been expecting, and she found herself smiling widely. Ryan was fast exceeding all of her expectations, turning out to be polite and conscientious and someone she knew her mom would be pleased she was dating.
The evening was drawing to a close, but Tina found herself reluctant to leave. She was enjoying the date, and could tell that Ryan was too, at least from the way he seemed to find something new to talk about, every time that she thought they should probably leave soon.
When Ryan called for the check, Tina didn't know if she should offer to pay, but Ryan was already reaching for his wallet. Seeing her look, Ryan frowned a little. Even the little creases in his face are sexy. “I never make my date pay the first time.”
“But you will let me pay sometimes, right?” Tina asked, with a small smile, knowing that she was tentatively asking for more dates.
There seemed to be a moment where Ryan didn't know what to say, but eventually a smile started to spread across his face. “I don't know. We might have to discuss that at length.”
“I would be happy to do that,” Tina told him seriously, mostly because it was definitely an affirmative for more dates, though there was always a chance he could change his mind once they were back home and going over the date. Still, for now she would take it. “Shall we go?”
Once the check was taken care off, Tina slipped her jacket back on and let Ryan guide her back out of the restaurant, his hand on the base of her spine once again.
“I had a great time,” Tina said, sliding back into the car. She settled her purse on her lap this time, buckling up and waiting for Ryan to start the car.
“So did I. Definitely worth the wait,” Ryan added, with a smile. He turned the key in the ignition and then pulled away from the curb.
Tina laughed at the reminder. “Well, things can only get better from here on out after something like that, can't they?”
Ryan nodded, still smiling.
Tina settled back against the seat. She was pleased that everything had turned out for the best, and with any luck, they would be going on another date pretty soon. The ride was over far too quickly, Tina still in the mindset that she wanted the night to go on forever, but they were outside of her building in no time at all.
Turning the key to stall the engine, Ryan turned in his seat. “Can I walk you to your door?”
Tina could get used to the gentleman act. “Of course.”
They walked up the steps to the door and Tina paused, purse tucked under her arm. “Thank you for tonight. I'm glad you came over and spoke to me.”
“So am I,” Ryan said. There was a brief pause, and then Ryan was putting his hand on her elbow. “I'll call you later?”
“Of course I will,” Tina said, voice low. She turned her cheek a little, and Ryan kissed it. “Bye.”
She waited until Ryan was down the steps and climbing back into his car, before she dug through her back for the key. He waved at her from the driver's seat and she responded, watching the car disappear round the corner before opening her front door. As soon as she was through, she kicked off her heels, massaging them a little before walking through to the living room. She was grinning as she collapsed backwards onto the couch, staring up at the ceiling. She wanted to call everyone – Maria, her mother – but she was willing to bask in the evening a little bit more, first. The connection between her and Ryan had lessened any over the entire evening, and she hoped that he would call, and that they would have more dates.
She was aware that just because she had fun, and just because Ryan told her he had, didn't mean that anything more was going to happen.
Still, she had gone on a date with a billionaire, and that was always something she could talk about, even if Ryan decided that she wasn't the one for him. She couldn't stop herself from being nervous about how he saw her, or how he saw the evening.
She grabbed her purse from her bag, and simply sent a text of exclamation points to Maria, and made a mental note to call her mother in the morning.
Ryan was the perfect man, and Tina wanted him to be her perfect man, but even if that never happened, she would remember this night as one of the best in her life.
Here’s to many more like this, Tina thought to herself as she closed her eyes, dreaming about Ryan.
Misdirection
Tina and Ryan were a thing.
She hadn't thought that they would be, not at first, especially as neither of them had contacted the other for a week or so. She had been too nervous, constantly brining up his name in her phone and thinking about calling, but never following through. Maria had laughed at her lack of courage, though she understood the sentiment. She was still adamant that Tina should call and arrange a second date, but Tina was worried that the fact that Ryan hadn't called meant he didn't want to, and if she called it would be embarrassing and humiliating for her.
“If he doesn't know that he has a good thing with you,” Maria said, looking unimpressed with Ryan's behaviour, “then he's not worth keeping.”
Tina felt warmth spread through her chest at the words, but she shrugged. “It was good while it lasted, right?”
Maria gave her a searching look, though Tina didn't know what it was she was looking for; Tina thought that she was being pretty open about how she felt. “But you do wish it had lasted a little longer?”
Staying silent, Tina didn't know how to answer that question. She did, because Ryan was great and funny and everything that she had ever wanted in a partner, but she also knew that they came from vastly different worlds, and if Ryan didn't want anything to do with her, then there wasn't a whole lot that she could do about it. “I do, but I understand if it turns out that he doesn't want it to.”
“Right,” Maria said, sounding unconvinced.
Tina didn't know how to explain that she had spent so long already trying to get over Ryan, so it would be simple enough to do. Not so simple to change how she felt, but simple enough to deal with. She could bury the feelings and not drag them up again. After all, the guy was a billionaire. Getting her hopes up that he would fall in love with someone like her, a normal girl who just became a nurse, was definitely way too much to hope for.
But when Tina was home that night, curled up with the radio on and reading a book, she received a text from Ryan. It was an apology – and a request to take her out on a date the next week. He hadn’t just thrown her aside after all!
Shoving down the thrill that ran through her at the fact that he had even text her, Tina forced herself to reply with her own apology, and then details. She spent at least five minutes wording and then re-wording her response, wanting it to be perfect. Tina hoped that this date would be as successful as the last, especially as she was longing for some more contact with Ryan that didn't end with a kiss in the evening.
They arranged to meet up the next Friday, which was the only day Tina had off the next week, and Tina settled back into her book, though it was much harder to concentrate now that she knew she would be seeing Ryan again. She texted Maria to let her know that things were on; if she hid anything from Maria again, Tina knew that her best friend would disown her, and she was the only person who Tina could turn to right now. They had been best friends for years, and Tina couldn't imagine her life without her.
Maria didn't text back until Tina was settling into bed, and then it was just a text to tell her that she was great, Ryan was great, but if things didn't work out, then she would find Ryan and punch him in the face. Grinning, Tina curled up around her pillow and went to sleep.
The date went wonderfully, and then there was another date. Then another. And another after that. Tina enjoyed Ryan's company, and he seemed to enjoy hers, though the fact that the choice of restaurants almost constantly tended to be on the pricier side made Tina frustrated. It wasn't that she didn't mind that Ryan paid for all of the dates, despite her offering from time to time, but she would like to spend some time in a place where she felt comfortable, and wasn't constantly having to check herself to make sure that she was acting appropriately. She didn't know how to broach the subject. She didn't want Ryan to turn around and refuse to date her because she wanted to go to somewhere she could afford and could truly be herself, but she knew that if she didn't, she was going to go mad – and Ryan would end up falling in love, not with Tina, but with someone she was trying desperately hard to be.
That first date, she entered the restaurant in a new dress – another she had purchased in town with Maria. She had her bag and high-heeled shoes on, and hoped that she looked the part for a restaurant like this. Taking a deep breath to steel herself for dealing with a restaurant she didn't really belong in, Tina clutched her bag tighter to her chest and then pushed open the door. Ryan was going to meet her at the table, and Tina hovered self-consciously in front of the waiter's podium. When he finally caught her eye, he raised his eyebrows.
“Can I help you, ma'am?”
“Um,” Tina shifted and then nodded quickly. “I'm here to meet someone?”
The waiter merely waited, and when Tina said Ryan's name, he immediately shifted demeanour, smiling and guiding her into the restaurant. “Of course. Let me take you to his table.”
Tina blushed, not knowing how to handle this much attention, but let the waiter lead her to where she could now see Ryan sitting calmly, taking care of some business on his phone while he waited for Tina to arrive. It was a highly decorated restaurant, much more than the ones she had ever been to. Still, she tried to smile as happily as she could when she sat down, hoping that Ryan wouldn't pick up on her nervousness. She didn't want to put him off in any way, and though it felt too much like lying, she wanted Ryan to want her.
“Hi,” Ryan said. His eyes crinkled in the corners when he smiled, and Tina felt her chest seize. He was so handsome and she just wanted him.
The waiter was still hovering by the table, so Ryan turned and gave him an acknowledging nod. “Could we have the wine list, please?”
“Of course, sir,” the waiter nodded, rushing off immediately.
Tina had never been to a restaurant where they gave out wine lists. She didn't know anything about wine. The differences between her and Ryan were startlingly obvious, but even more so in a setting like this. She laid her clutch bag on the table and tried not to look too agitated.
“So,” Ryan said. “How have you been?”
“Busy,” Tina offered. “I didn't know how to call you.”
Ryan grinned. “Me neither. I didn't think you would want to go out with me again.”
Tina's eyes widened. She didn't know what to say to that; it had never occurred to her that Ryan might be just as nervous about her as she was about him – mostly because they were so different, and Ryan could have anyone.
“Well, we're here now,” she offered, smiling widely.
It was so easy to be with Ryan, and she really wanted it to continue. They could be something, she knew, if they worked hard at it.
“I bought you something,” Ryan said, reaching into his pocket.
Tina immediately flushed, though she wasn't sure why Ryan felt like he had to keep buying her things. She loved everything he gave her; he almost seemed to know what she liked better than she even did, but that didn't mean she felt comfortable with him all the time. Telling him was difficult; she wanted him to be happy, she wanted to be happy, but how could she tell him that he was making her uncomfortable with his constant attention, and taking her to restaurants where she felt completely out of place?
He gave her a heated look as he handed over the jewellery box, and she took it, willing her hands to look like they weren't shaking quite so much. She flipped the top of the box and couldn't stop the gasp that left her mouth. The earrings inside were a pair of butterflies, fragile to the look and to the touch, but they had a string of diamonds hanging down from the centre of the back. She didn't want to think about what they must have cost, and knew that they were white – so they would match almost every outfit – but she didn't want Ryan spending that much money on her. He didn't have to; she liked him anyway.
“These are beautiful,” she said, hearing how awed she sounded. She closed the lid and placed the jewellery box on the table. “Thank you so much.”
Ryan reached across the table and took hold of her hand, smoothing a finger over the back of it. “I'm glad you like them.”
When
he looked at her like that, Tina wanted him so badly, and she could picture the two of them spending a good portion of their lives together, providing everything worked out, but then reality would bite her, and she would remember how vastly different they were. “I do. You don't have to buy me things to make me like you, you know.” She said it with a light tone, and hoped that her smile conveyed she was joking, even if she was hoping that he would take her somewhat seriously.
His expression didn't change. In fact his smile softened somewhat. “Don't worry, I know.”
Tina felt her heart sink, but refused to stop smiling. He was kind of perfect.
The rest of the meal passed in a blur of happiness, laughter, and only mild discomfort. Once she was over the initial worry about how she looked, came across, or dealt with the situation, she relaxed a little and gave in to her feelings of attraction to Ryan. Still, by the time it came to leave, and she was slipping back into her jacket, she noticed a couple sitting by the door who gave her an appraising look. The woman was looking down her nose, and it was this that struck Tina. She kept close to Ryan as they left the restaurant, and tried not to let the woman's look bother her, but she could feel the back of her neck heating up in embarrassment anyway.
“Are you okay?” Ryan said, with a frown.
She nodded, giving him her best smile. It seemed to work, because Ryan relaxed. “Just a little cold.”
She didn't want to lie to him, but she didn't know how to tell him the truth. She let him pull her a little closer, and open the car door for her. She loved being treated like a princess, and she wanted it to continue, but she didn't know how much longer she could pretend that she was comfortable with the way that things were going.
Ryan started the car, but didn't drive for a moment. “Do you want to come back to my place?”
Tina could feel her body heating up a little almost immediately, though she smoothed down her skirt and pretended that she wasn't affected quite so much. “I think I'd rather go back to mine.” Watching his face fall, she hastened to add, “I meant that you should come back to mine instead.”
