Need You Now

by Yahrah St. John

  Seconds later, Ethan burst through the door to Kayla’s office and she glanced up. “Ethan.” She sighed. He was the last person she wanted to see. She wasn’t prepared to do battle with him. “What do you want?”

  Ethan slammed the door behind him and strode toward her desk. He leaned down until he was eye-to-eye with Kayla. “I want to know why you’re having lunch with other men.”

  “What?”

  “You heard me,” he said through clenched teeth.

  Kayla couldn’t believe her ears and pushed back her chair. “So you’re having me followed? Are you really that paranoid?” What other way was there to explain why he knew she’d had lunch with Ayden?

  “Of course not. Daniel was having lunch and saw you.”

  “And he ran right back to tell you. Great!” Kayla threw down the pen she’d been writing with. “So, you want to get into this right here?”

  “By all means,” Ethan said, staring down at her icily.

  “Fine!” Kayla rose from her chair. “Why don’t you explain why you didn’t come home last night and were caught in a gentleman’s club? How about we start with that?”

  “So is that why you went out with Ayden?”

  “Don’t deflect and try to turn this back on me.” Kayla pointed her finger at him. “You started this.”

  “And you were going to finish it, right?” Ethan returned. He was staring daggers at her. “Why else would you go out with your ex?”

  “What does it matter to you?” Kayla replied. “Hell, we have your ex spread out on billboards across this city with the Adams Cosmetics logo, and do you hear me whining?”

  “You haven’t answered my question,” Ethan fumed. “Are you still in love with your ex?”

  “I don’t have to tell you a thing. My personal feelings are my own.”

  “You’re my wife!”

  “Ha!” Kayla laughed and faced him like a tiger ready to pounce. “You may have bought me, but I am not your slave, Ethan.”

  “Kayla, I’m warning you!”

  “Warning me?” Kayla seethed with rage and humiliation at his audacity given everything he’d done. “You’re not the boss of me. I can have lunch with whomever I please. Matter of fact, I’m done with this conversation. Get out of my office!”

  Kayla went to turn her back on him and Ethan swept her in his arms and imprisoned her against his body. “Like hell, you will!” Ethan roared. He bent down and kissed her long and hard.

  His kiss both angered and aroused Kayla. “Let me go!” She struggled against him, but Ethan’s hold was like a vise. She hated that his mouth was masterful and he used it to give her a hot, yearning kiss that made heat pool in the lower half of her body, especially when she felt him hard against her.

  Before Kayla knew what was happening, he was pushing her backside against her desk. He pushed all the papers on her desk aside and they went tumbling to the floor. Then Ethan ripped open the blouse she was wearing with both hands and buttons went flying in every direction. He clumsily worked the silky straps of her bra down her shoulders, exposing her bare breasts to his searing gaze. And then his mouth came down on her, drawing one breast into his mouth. He began sucking on her nipple until it turned into a tight crest.

  Kayla didn’t know how she moved from anger to lust in five minutes flat. It didn’t make any sense what they were doing and where they were doing it. All she knew was that she wanted him naked and inside her. She worked his suit jacket off and tossed it across the room. She tugged his shirt from the waistband of his trousers and pulled it free while he hiked her skirt up to her waist and began fumbling with the scrap of fabric that was her panties.

  Ethan lowered them down her legs until he came to the soft tuft of her hair at the center of her thighs. He slid his fingers inside and found her wet and warm and ready. As was he. He could feel his rock-hard erection straining in his briefs. He was happy when Kayla unfastened his trousers and pushed them and his briefs down his legs in one quick movement.

  He quickly settled himself between her thighs, gripped her buttocks and thrust inside her, filling her completely and making them one. He secured a handful of her hair in his fist and lowered his mouth again on hers.

  Kayla skimmed her fingernails down his back as he gripped her waist and dove inside her. Ethan was exultant that this woman was his and thrust inside her again and again while Kayla chanted his name like a prayer or ritual. Their coupling was fierce as Ethan frantically brought them to fulfillment. When it was over, they gradually slid off the desk and collapsed in a limp heap on the floor, spent.

  As she looked up at the ceiling, Kayla was overcome with what had just happened. Not only had she been mindless to where she was and made love in her office, where anyone could have heard or seen them, but they’d just made love without protection.

  “That was pretty crazy, huh?” Ethan said finally, but Kayla didn’t speak, so he turned to face her and stroked her cheek. “Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

  Kayla turned away so he couldn’t see tears welling in her eyes. What had she done? How had she let the situation get so out of control? She always made a habit out of making sure he had on a condom, but just now, she’d let lust get the best of her and what if… She was afraid to even think of the possibility.

  “Kayla.” Ethan leaned over and grasped her chin to face him and found her skin wet. “Are you crying?”

  “No.” Kayla struggled to sit up. She glanced around for something to put on, but her current outfit was in shreds on the floor.

  “You’re a bad liar.” Ethan smiled, sitting up along with her. “Here, take my shirt.” He slid it off his shoulders since he was still partially wearing it.

  “Thanks.” Kayla slid her arms inside the garment and curled her legs underneath her. A million ideas were swimming through her head, many of which had a dancing baby, but she couldn’t let Ethan know them. If he thought about it and thought there could be any chance of a baby, he would never let her go.

  “When I came in here, I didn’t intend for that to happen,” Ethan stated, turning to her. “I came in here to throttle you because I was so upset and to explain about last night.”

  “Don’t bother,” Kayla said, rising to her feet and heading to the closet near her private shower. She kept a spare suit in her office in case of an emergency and could change into that. No one would ever know that they’d just had sex in her office.

  “Kayla, don’t you think we should talk about this?”

  “Talking is what got us into this,” Kayla said. She tossed his shirt back at him as she walked into her private bathroom.

  She emerged fifteen minutes later, freshly showered and with her hair brushed back into a ponytail. Ethan had redressed and looked as polished as when he had first stepped in.

  Being in the shower had given Kayla time to think. She needed to figure out what she was going to do if she were pregnant. She needed an exit strategy and for that she needed to be alone, away from Ethan.

  Ethan smiled. “Good thing you have an extra set of clothes.” He’d disposed of the outfit he’d destroyed.

  “Good thing.” Kayla half smiled as she walked toward him.

  “So you ready for that talk now?” Ethan inquired. He couldn’t read her face. It was expressionless, which wasn’t the Kayla he knew. She usually wore her heart on her sleeve and he could read her pretty easily, but this time her emotions were masked. It made his mind reel. Had he gone too far?

  “Ethan, I need a break from this marriage.”

  He hadn’t expected that statement and it angered him immediately. “If you think I’m going to give you a divorce, you’re dead wrong, Kayla. We made a deal.” He knew he sounded harsh; he just wasn’t prepared to lose her. She meant too much to him.

  “I’m not saying I want a divorce,” Kayla snapped. She didn’t appreciate his tone. “I just need to think, so I’m going to my parents’ home for a while.”

  Ethan thought about what she wasn’t saying. “Time t
o think, you mean you want time away from me?”

  “Yes.” Kayla forced herself to look at the man she loved, the man whose child she could be carrying. “And I’m hoping you will respect me enough to give me that time.”

  “Frankly, I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to be apart right now. I think we need to figure out what’s going on between us, but I respect you enough to give you your space.” Perhaps some time and distance would be good for the both of them. So when they came back together, they could finally decide what kind of marriage they were going to have once and for all.

  “Thank you,” Kayla responded, and walked over to her desk to grab her purse out of her drawer. “We’ll talk soon.”

  And with those words she was out the door, leaving Ethan to wonder about the state of their marriage.

  Chapter 14

  Her parents’ home was her second stop. Her first was Piper’s apartment. She needed to talk, and despite the abrupt end to their last conversation on the subject, she knew Piper would listen because she was the only one who knew Kayla’s true feelings for Ethan.

  Piper was surprised when she opened the door and found Kayla on the other side. “Girlfriend, what are you doing here?”

  “Can we talk?”

  “Of course.” Piper ushered her inside. She watched Kayla go immediately to the couch and plop down. “Oh, this calls for some wine.” Piper went to walk to the kitchen, but Kayla stopped her.

  “I can’t have wine, maybe tea?”

  Piper stopped short and turned around. She knew what no wine meant. “Okay, I’ll be back in a sec.”

  She returned a couple of minutes later to the living room and joined Kayla on the sofa. “I turned on the kettle. Now you want to tell me what the heck’s going on? Is this about the article in the paper?”

  “Not entirely.”

  “Fill me in.”

  Kayla sighed. “Where do I begin? Do I start with the fact that I’m in a loveless marriage? Or maybe that my husband is having an affair with our new spokeswoman, his ex-girlfriend, or perhaps that I just had unprotected sex with my husband in my office and can now be pregnant?”

  “Oh, my goodness!” Piper slouched down on the couch.

  “You’re telling me,” Kayla responded.

  Piper ran her hands through her shock of red hair. “Okay, first things first. How do you know he’s having an affair?”

  “I saw them with my own eyes at the launch party, Piper. She was sidled close to him and poised to give him a big kiss and he didn’t push her away. I couldn’t bear to watch anymore.”

  “Did you confront Ethan about his duplicity?”

  Kayla shook her head. “I couldn’t. If I did, he would know how much he hurt me and I don’t want or need his pity.”

  “Yet you had unprotected sex with him after knowing all this?”

  “I know, I know.” Kayla dropped her head in her hands in despair. “It’s awful, isn’t it? That I have no self-control? We got into a fight about the article and my lunch with Ayden and one thing led to another and we were having sex on my desk.”

  Piper rolled her eyes upward. “Kay, I’m sorry, but this story keeps getting juicier. How did Ayden get back in the picture?”

  “Courtney and I ran into him the other day while playing tennis and we just so happened to have lunch today of all days. I wasn’t trying to get back at Ethan because of the article.”

  “But that’s how he took it?” Piper asked. “Sounds like he was jealous.”

  “No, more like possessive. I’m his, and even though he doesn’t want me 100 percent, he doesn’t want anyone else to have me. So he promptly staked his claim by having his way with me in my office and I foolishly allowed it to happen.”

  “And now you could be pregnant? Oh, Lord, this is a royal mess.”

  “What’s worst yet is that I love him, Piper. I honestly love him and he doesn’t love me,” Kayla cried. “And if I’m pregnant with his child, it will be a reminder of what never was and what will never be. I don’t know if I can deal with that.”

  “Oh, Kayla.” Piper scooted closer and hugged her best friend. “No matter what happens, no matter the outcome, we will get through this. I promise.”

  Her father was surprised to see Kayla at the breakfast table the following morning. She’d stayed late at Piper’s the previous evening because she hadn’t wanted to answer any questions. She’d snuck past Victor to her old bedroom without anyone seeing her, but now it was time to pay the piper, no pun intended.

  “Baby girl.” Her father kissed her forehead. “I’m surprised to see you home, but happy nonetheless.”

  “Thank you, Daddy.” Kayla gave him a halfhearted smile. She sipped on the tea Victor had made her earlier.

  “So how long are you here for?”

  “Oh, I don’t know, a few days,” Kayla replied nonchalantly. She didn’t want to get into a long conversation on why she was staying at home.

  Her father stared at her. “And Ethan is okay with that? I know I don’t like to be away from your mother for very long.”

  “Yes, Ethan knows and he’s okay with it.”

  “Well, that’s great!” He squeezed her shoulder and reached across the table to pour himself some coffee. “We are happy to have you here, if only for a little while.”

  “I’m happy to be here, too,” Kayla responded. She needed the comfort that being home provided her. She had a lot to think about. Namely, what she was going to do if she were pregnant. Would she want to keep the baby? Did she want to continue this marriage? And could she, if she were carrying his child knowing that he didn’t love her? She wouldn’t be able to stay in a pretend marriage because making love with Ethan in her office could have changed her life forever.

  She was mulling those thoughts over when Shane joined them in the breakfast room. “Sis, what did we do to deserve the honor of your presence?” he asked jokingly, though he had some idea why she was back home. He’d seen yesterday’s paper and Ethan was in the gossip section.

  “Just needed to get away from the old ball and chain.” Kayla attempted a joke.

  “Are you sure that’s all there is?” Shane inquired.

  “Yes, I’m sure.”

  An uncomfortable silence fell over the table. “Well, I have to get going,” Kayla said. “Meeting at the office. I’ll see you both at dinner.” She didn’t want to discuss her marriage any more than was necessary especially when she didn’t understand it herself.

  “Ethan?” Daniel called out when he came to the estate after work because Ethan had phoned in sick two days in a row, which he never did. So Daniel came to see for himself what was going on. When he did, he found Ethan closed off in his study in the dark. He was still in yesterday’s clothes, hadn’t shaved and an empty decanter of scotch sat next to him.

  “Leave me alone!” he roared.

  Daniel turned on the light switch, flooding the study with light. “What’s going on, Ethan?”

  Ethan shielded his eyes with his hand and lowered his head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Where’s Kayla?” Daniel inquired, coming forward to stand in front of him. He couldn’t imagine she would allow Ethan to behave this way. “Gone.”

  “What do you mean gone?”

  “She’s decided she’s had enough of me and needed a break,” Ethan responded and turned his back to Daniel

  “So you decided to get drunk alone?”

  “That’s about right.”

  “Ethan, listen. I think it’s about time you started facing facts.”

  “Oh, really? And what might that be?”

  “That you love your wife,” Daniel stated. Ethan turned around and glanced up at him strangely. “Don’t look like the idea hasn’t crossed your mind. You love Kayla and you’re upset that she’s gone, so you’re drowning your sorrows in liquor.”

  “Even if that were true—” Ethan pointed at Daniel, or at least in his direction, since his vision was a little fuzzy “—which I’m no
t saying it is, she doesn’t want or love me back. If you could have seen how she looked at me after we made love in her office, it was horrible.”

  “You had sex in her office?”

  Ethan nodded. “Yeah, we both got overcome by—”

  Daniel held up his hand. “You don’t have to explain to me. I get the picture. The question is, what are you going to do about it?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Are you going to tell Kayla how you truly feel?”

  “I can’t make someone love me, Daniel. And after what I did to get her in this marriage, how could she?” He sure wouldn’t. He’d put her through so much. He didn’t deserve Kayla or her love.

  “You will never know that unless you tell her.”

  Daniel had a point, but Ethan wasn’t sure he could. He’d never put himself out there for any other woman before. He wasn’t even sure of the right words to say. “Thanks, Daniel, I appreciate the advice.”

  “I just hope you listen to it.”

  Ethan cleaned up his act and made it to the office the next day. He wasn’t much in the mood to work, but he was CEO of Graham International.

  He was trying to focus on work, but couldn’t stop mulling over what Daniel had said. Was it possible Kayla could love him, too? He was interrupted from his thoughts when Byron Adams stopped by his office. What had prompted Kayla’s father to come? As he recalled, Byron had vowed to never come back to GI’s office ever again. “Byron, I’m surprised to see you here.”

  “This is not a social visit, Ethan. I’m here to discuss Kayla,” Byron said from the doorway.

  “Come in, please have a seat.” Ethan motioned for Byron to sit down.

  “I’ll stand,” Byron replied and walked over to the window across from Ethan. He stared out for a long time and said. “I’ve allowed this farce of a marriage between you and my daughter to go on for too long, but no more.” He turned to face Ethan.

  “Byron…”

  “My daughter is miserable because of you, Ethan, and I can’t let this continue a moment longer.”