Ace's Redemption

by A. C. Bextor

“It’s sooo hot out here, though. It’ll burn, won’t it?”

  My dad winks at me and laughs as he sets the glass pitcher down and crouches to Decklan, getting ready to explain the process of sun tea.

  Well over a year ago, I was headed here not knowing how my life would change with the help of Ace and his family. I never thought it possible that the person I’ve always known myself to be, whore, liar, and drug abuser, would evolve into something of much more meaning and importance. Raegan – mother, daughter, lover, and friend – is who I’ve spent the last year being. I find myself loved by many and in turn have devoted my life to repaying each of them for what they’ve sacrificed and done for me.

  “Raegan, where the fuck are my keys?” Ace winces after stepping out onto the deck, seeing Decklan present and listening to his words intently.

  “Ace says bad words, Grandpa. Why aren’t you telling him about his mouth and soap?”

  “Because he’s too big.” Sending Ace an annoyed glare, Dad finishes his lesson. “If he wasn’t so big he’d get it good.”

  Ace looks down at me and mouths ‘sorry’ as he leans in and kisses my forehead while I lay in the lawn chair, soaking up the last of the morning sun before the summer California heat takes over.

  “You put them in your pocket when we came home last night. Check your jeans.”

  “Right. What the hell are they doin’?” Ace asks, pointing to Dad who is now carrying Diamond, our new puppy, out in the yard for his weekly bath.

  “Spraying down your damn dog.” My voice is harsh, but it softens gently so he doesn’t get upset. “I’m just guessing.”

  “Don’t curse the dog, Rae. Decklan needs a pet.”

  “A fish would have been less messy.”

  “Fuck fish.”

  “Fuck your dog. I found another ‘surprise’ this morning before I let him out.”

  “He’ll get it. He needs time. You being cranky to him doesn’t help his stress.”

  “I’m going to be cranky until he does ‘get it,’ Ace. You didn’t even pick a smart one out of the litter. Should have got a girl.”

  Ace and I bought a house. It’s small but the backyard has grass and room for Decklan to play in. Ace insisted on getting him a golden retriever. My shoes, brushes, and oddly my underwear are ripped apart and eaten daily. I swear the dog has the attention span of a gnat, and the only thing I like about him is his name.

  Ace and I are truly happy. One day at a time, he’s attempting to adhere to my habits and I’m learning to tolerate his. His protective tendencies haven’t changed. I’m still being told what to do, what to wear, and where to go. Because of this, I’m enthusiastically pushing those boundaries and reaping their rewards as often as possible.

  Decklan has adjusted well to his new surroundings. He and Ace are buddies. I never would’ve thought Ace had a soft spot for kids, but it’s evident now that he does. Decklan gets away with everything. I’m sorry I can’t give him a child of his own, but he swears that between Sarah, Bean, Deck, and me that his life is full and happy.

  “I’m gonna head into work. I’ll be back by dinner.”

  “Good, bring something home. I’m not cooking. I’ll be busy cleaning up dog shit, I’m sure.”

  Ace mutters “cranky” while walking away, generously giving me a view of his backside.

  Ace’s new job at The Ward has afforded more financial stability to Bean and Sarah. He’s moved them into an apartment near our house and they come and go often. Sarah is still wreaking havoc on Ace’s nerves, but now she’s doing it with a fifteen, almost sixteen-year-old mentality. Boys, clothes, shoes, and shopping are all she thinks about even as Ace preaches family values and academics. She doesn’t listen.

  My dad tells me he loves California. He also said he doesn’t miss my mom, however I’m unsure I believe him. She never made the move to live here. She talks to Decklan every week and came to visit him last year, on his sixth birthday, but that was where her devotion to even him stopped. She’ll always be his grandma and when she’s ready to visit again, she will.

  Travis is still working as an auto and bike mechanic and lives alone in his apartment downtown. He, too, comes and goes in and out of our place often. To Ace’s complete dismay, Travis is my best friend. We spend time together when we can but call and text every day. Ace has yet to get used to this. My hope is that eventually he understands that Travis and I share a lot in common.

  Marlee and Toby are expecting another baby. This has weighed heavily on Toby, his concern and fear evident even through his excitement. From what I’ve been told, there were many complications while she carried Maddux, but so far the doctors are staying positive.

  Hayden Flynn. Out of all of us, he’s the one who’s the least grounded. His man-whore ways haven’t slowed and he’s admitted that he’s nowhere near ready to settle down. His dad, the attorney, has confessed to being an alcoholic, causing Hayden to move from his own apartment and in with his dad to temporarily assist him with his attempted recovery. We still hear from him often and see him on Friday nights, but no traces of his cocky and arrogant personality remain.

  Our Peril family remain in our thoughts, but going back to Ohio is no longer an option that Ace and I discuss. Our home is here, with Deck, Dad, Bean, Sarah, and friends. We call when we can and send cards on occasion.

  These last several months, with therapy and the support of my family, I’ve learned to not live in fear – as much. My nightmares are finally gone as the darkness has been laid to rest. Whatever happens next, and whatever the changes bring, I’ll be ready to bend to them with adversity and determination. The fear of breaking no longer holds any power over me.

  For me, self-taught lessons have always been non-existent. I’ve always been blinded by the things in life I couldn’t have. Loving parents, stable income growing up, Sadey Lyons, a little brother, just to name a few. While I focused on the things I didn’t have, I lost sight of things I did; Sarah, Bean, the band, Peril, and Raegan.

  I couldn’t have Sadey, but it never deterred me from my mission to make her mine. In the process, I lost pieces of myself that I can’t get back. I lost the respect of my friends and brothers at Peril. I lost so much time with Bean and Sarah. Most importantly, I lost my own self-respect. Being able to finally let her go, the way I needed to let her go, has been the most freeing act I’ve ever experienced. Giving that love and more to Raegan has been the most capturing. Raegan holds my heart with care; she loves me in spite of myself.

  Knowing I can’t change the past and knowing with certainty that I wouldn’t want to eases the guilt. Every event that’s happened to me until now was a piece to my life’s complete puzzle and, thankfully, it’s brought me to where I am, standing in the living room, looking outside as Raegan sits in her lawn chair, enjoying our life together with her dad and son making it complete.

  Decklan and I are buddies. He’s a great kid and he worships me. Although I can admit it’s flattering, this isn’t why I love him. I love him because he’s an extension of his mother. The love he has for those around him is unquestionable. He wakes up happy and goes to sleep thankful. The only thing he doesn’t carry from Rae is her defiant nature. He’s easy. Thank fuck.

  His father, who he never really knew, is dead. His uncle, the malevolent man that tried to take him away from everything he knew, is rotting in hell. The only family he has now are those that surround him with love. I’m determined to safeguard this for him.

  Doing as I was told, I’m searching for my keys in the pocket of the jeans I wore last night. Our bedroom is unorganized chaos and I love every piece of it. The clothes Rae wore last night are carelessly discarded to the floor, her shoes scattered near the closet, and a row of framed pictures of everyone we love decorates our bedroom. The scent of her surrounds me.

  This is what forever happiness feels like.

  Pulling my phone and keys from my jeans, I check the blinking light indicating a new incoming text.

  Travis 05:38 a.m. I have a
sister.

  What? Travis, as far as I know, is an only child.

  07:27 a.m. Don’t understand. Explain.

  His father is dead and his mother left when he was three. Travis doesn’t trust many and he loves only a select few. If he isn’t fuckin’ with me, this will throw his life a definite curveball that he’ll need help with catching.

  Travis 07:29 a.m. She showed up at my apartment last night. Her name is Lacey, and she knows where my mom is.

  My phone rings as I start to send another text in response. “Trav?”

  He doesn’t offer a greeting, just gets to the point. “She knocked on my door at one-thirty this morning.”

  “Her name is Lacey?”

  “Yep. Lacey Quinn Wells. We talked until four o’clock this morning when she finally fell asleep.”

  This makes sense; he sounds exhausted. “She knows where your mom is?”

  “Yep. She lives about an hour out of San Francisco with some fuck-wad that Lacey hates, along with a boyfriend who’s an adulterous ass. Both of these men are what led her to find me. Apparently, my dear ole mother only recently bothered to tell Lacey she has an older brother.”

  Curiously, I ask, “How old is she?”

  “Twenty-one, but fuck, Ace, she looks like she’s about fifteen, if that.”

  “She hot?” I’m trying to lighten his somber mood. I’m not good with my friends and situations that hurt them.

  “Seriously? She’s my sister, asshole.”

  “I’m just kiddin’. You’re gonna need to lighten up a little bit here.”

  He pauses before he answers. Seconds go by and I almost ask if he’s still there, but then he sighs his answer. “Hayden would fuck her. Maybe twice and even without another girl there.”

  “Shit. Then she has to be fuckin’ hot.”

  The volume of his voice increases as he tries to explain her personality. “She’s Squirt on fuckin’ steroids, Ace. You don’t even know. She seems nice, but also feisty as fuck, and don’t get me started on her skills of self-defense. I think she may have broken my fuckin’ toe on her way in.”

  “Oh, shit. She is Sarah.” I can’t help but smile into the phone. Trav’s tolerance of Sarah is almost worse than mine. If this is also true, he’s fucked.

  “Yeah. Fuck me.”

  “This is a lot of info, Trav. You all right?”

  “Nope. Not even a little. Can you come meet her after you get off this evening and tell me what you think?”

  “Yeah. Let me talk to Rae.”

  “Thanks, man. I’m gonna get off here and see if she’s awake. Hoping since she talked so much last night, she won’t have energy to start in again until after noon.”

  “It’s all right, Travis. We’ll figure it out.”

  “Fuck me.” That’s all I hear before he disconnects the call.

  Travis has a little sister. He’s spent years merely trying to get used to Squirt. If all she says is true, and she’s really his family, this will change his life as he knows it to be. Travis will have a family again.

  Grabbing a pen and paper from the dresser drawer, I write Rae a quick note so she finds it when I’m gone and I won’t be asked a thousand questions that I don’t have answers to. Travis and Raegan are tight. Whatever. Let them figure all this shit out.

  Cover Art created by: Melody Simmons of ebookindiecovers.com

  Editing by: Hot Tree Editing Services of hottreeedits.com

  Formatting by: Champagne Formats http://thewineyreader.com/champagneformats/

  Dallace and Paul – Thank you both for everything you do for our family. I love you dearly and appreciate your sacrifices while I’m busy writing. You’re everything to me.

  Ashleigh ‘Hoodkiller’ - Look at it!! Dance, monkey, dance! In no way do I say this without complete sincerity, you’re brutal on my books, little sister. Your feedback, as this project progressed, finally becoming a story, was crucial to its development. Your dedication and patience for these characters went far beyond measure. Thank you, shrimp. Now, stop telling me to channel inner darkness. I don’t like it! Send in the clowns. 1678 is always going to be a sad little number, isn’t it? Goofs!

  Amber Shavor – Every day, your positive reinforcements pushed me to make Ace’s story stronger and better. It’s because of this that the story got done in the manner it did. Time and time again, you were with me during the writer’s block and listened to my endless complaints, and also supplied me with super-hot man pictures. ---------- 147 – I give you my sincerest thank you!

  Dana Hook – Indies Rock, damn it. You’re hell on wheels with a dedication and drive aimed to promote and assist the indie community in every way. When I wanted to quit, your standard response of, “keep writing” kept me going. Thank you for your encouragement. I’m proud of you for creating new and inventive ways to assist the indie world. R.E.D. (Rebel Edit and Design) speaks volumes in regards to your dedication.

  Tracy Brewer - Thank you for your belief in me. Several times, when my confidence was weary, you were willing to give me your honesty. It kept me focused and grounded. Thank you for loving my Peril boys and hope you appreciate those of Despair with the same enthusiasm.

  Amy W. and Alesha Newby, red pen masters – You two were my sounding board and quiet piece of sanity. Let’s be honest, your constant lectures pushed me when I was ready to call it over and done. Thank you, my friends, for being there when I needed an outlet. JW4E.

  Beta Readers:

  Chris Kovacich, Samantha Price, Rebeka C. Perales, Keri P., Danni Werner, Jennifer Hagan, Monique R., Christina Gragg - Each of you offered your advice with eagerness and encouragement. I can’t ever thank you enough for your time and dedication to the project as it unfolded. I owe you all my genuine appreciation. You are truly amazing people.

  To the authors of Open Road, A Bikers Anthology – Nina, Lila, Chelle, Jani, Dawn, Emily, Glenna, and Ryan – Thank you for all the help in preparing the collection and the side notes of advice as well. I appreciate you all. Toys for Tots is an incredibly important charity and with our work we made a difference to many.

  Maria Gaul – Thanks for starting the Peril group for people to share their thoughts about the books and characters. It’s become so much more. Good idea!

  Bloggers - There are so many of you out there that have helped me in many ways. I can’t write my own blurbs without hesitation, so I can’t imagine reading the books, writing reviews, and promoting author’s work full time. So many of you have let me do takeovers and giveaways and answered my questions in the process. You have my undying gratitude!

  Love Between the Sheets – Thank you for hosting my release party, cover reveal, and blog tour. Mary, thank you for answering every single question I had (and there were many.) I can’t expression my appreciation for all of your assistance!

  More information regarding the Devil’s Despair series availability can be found throughout various media channels.

  You can add me as a friend on Facebook: AC Bextor on Facebook

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  Hit ‘Like’ on my author page: AC Bextor - Author

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  Thank you and Happy Reading.

  Prologue – Hayden’s Verse

  Name and content is subject to change prior to final publication.

  Hayden

  I don’t believe in love at first sight.

  I don’t believe in love at all.

  Love is an emotion that drives people to the brink of their own sanity on a bullshit cloud of happiness and pleasure; only to slam them back down to earth when the reality of their day-in and day-out relationship reveals its true form. The mundane responsibilities, coupled with the sexless nights and torturous days filled with unbearable nagging, begin to wash away memories of the heated passion and late night laughs without worry the two of you once shared. By the time you realize what you’ve gotten yourself
into, you’re forced to endure a painful breakup or a life spent wishing you’d made different choices before settling on “the one.”

  Love is expensive to the heart and damaging to the soul.

  I’ve felt the effects of what love does.

  I never knew my mother. She left me with my dad a few days after I was born and they were never married. To her, it was a summer fling and I was the result of too much wine and a poor decision right before their passionate affair ended. To my father, though, she was the one that got away. He was left heartbroken and empty, filling the void with alcohol and nameless faces that took their place in his bed.

  My dad once told me that my mother battled depression all her life and she knew, instinctively, by the time I was born that she couldn’t be the parent she felt I deserved. Dad accepted her decision to leave us and in response to her doing so, he raised me alone the best he could. After she left, he never trusted anyone enough to believe in real and true love again. He’s played the emotionless unavailable bachelor ever since. Now, it’s all he knows.

  While most fathers were teaching their sons how to play baseball, catch fish, or change a tire in an emergency, my dad taught me how to pick up a woman, take what I wanted from her and then send her back to wherever it was she came from – leaving her left with only the memory of our meaningless encounter.

  “Play them all, Hayden. Don’t you ever settle for just one. Women fuck everything up. You can give them your body, but never trust them with your heart.” This is what he said to me during one of this drunken tirades. I was eleven at the time, and had no idea what he was rambling on about. But I do now.

  Love makes people crazy.

  My friend Ace is the perfect example of what the effects of love has on a person. Although I’m elated for him that he’s found what he considers happiness after all the hell that life has handed him, he’s nowhere close to the same man I once knew him to be.

  He’s whipped.

  Raegan Simmons has turned his life inside out. He no longer stays out late partying with his friends and after heading into work half-drunk or hung over. He pays no attention the women who throw themselves at his feet in blind passion, begging for the chance at a one night stand. Instead, he works a forty-hour work week, picks up a six year old kid after school each day, gets home in time to make dinner and then finishes up his evening by sitting in front of the television before turning in at ten o’clock each night.