*****
Joshua downed the whiskey with a grimace. He was not a drinker and he had spent the night before trying to drown his sorrows and had woken up with a bitch of a headache. It had not worked; he had spent the night feeling her beside him; the touch of her soft skin and the taste of her inside his mouth. The way she looked naked; her beautiful smile with the dimples peeking out and the way her hair tumbled all over her face. He had spent a restless night trying to forget her and had ended with a hard on that had caused him so much pain that he had had to get up in the middle of the night and indulge in a cold shower.
Now it was a whole new world of suffering he was experiencing. He had no appetite for food and had halfheartedly prepared a grilled cheese sandwich and had eaten half of it and now was back to the whiskey.
His phone rang just then and his heart jumped; thinking it was Faith but it was his mother. “Hiya Mom,” he forced the cheerfulness into his voice; trying to remember if he was supposed to go to dinner.
“What’s wrong?” Claire asked immediately.
Joshua rolled his eyes; he had forgotten how attuned to his feelings his mother was. “Nothing is wrong, why would you think that?”
“Because there’s a slur in your voice and I called Faith and she sounded as if her best friend had just died,” his mother told him.
“How is she – I mean how did she sound?” he improvised.
“Why don’t you call her yourself and find out?” his mother sounded a trifle annoyed.
“We’re giving each other space,” he told her shortly.
“And both doing a fine job of it too,” she retorted. “Are you going to stop going into the office?”
He closed his eyes briefly, the pounding in his head increasing. He had not thought about that aspect of it. “Don’t be ridiculous,” he muttered wishing she would get off the phone.
“Don’t take that tone with me young man,” she told him sharply. “You need to go and fix your love life and for your information, what is ridiculous is both of you depriving yourselves of each other’s company.” She hung up without waiting for a response.
He finished the bottle of whiskey and promptly went into the bathroom to throw up in the sink. His head felt as if it was floating from his body and he swore he would never drink hard liquor again – there had to be another way to get rid of one’s misery.
He took a shower and felt much better. He realized he was starving and his stomach was rumbling. He went into the kitchen and fixed himself a plate of pasta. He ate that and drank several glasses of lemonade, dreading going to work tomorrow.
*****
Faith was in a good mood. She had decided what she was going to do and how she was going to go about it. She felt cheerful and light and prepared to face Josh tomorrow. She had even planned the outfit she was going to wear; red and white sleeveless dress that had a narrow hem and was just above her knees and a fitted white jacket. She was wearing black heels with it. He would not know what hit him. But first she had a letter to write.
It was going to be handwritten – it had to be for it to have the effect she wanted it to have.
“Dear Josh,” she penned. “I have suffered a colossal loss when I lost my mother and she was the last person I told I loved and it had an effect on me. You came into my life like a hurricane (smile) and I did not know what hit me. You swept me off my feet and I am still up in the air. What you make me feel is something I never expected to experience and for that I thank God for you and what you make me feel. I have been so afraid of letting myself feel because I have been afraid I would lose you; I was afraid of losing you but now I realize how ridiculous that sounds and it’s better to spend just a few years God allows than to spend a day without you. I love you Joshua, there I have said it! I love you so much I don’t know where I leave off and you begin. I want to spend the rest of my life showing you how much. I want to share my life with you if you’ll still have me. I am humbled by your love and I want you to know I will never take you for granted. Have I told you that I love you? I love you, I love you my darling Josh and I will always love you, so there; I think I have said it all. Thanks for coming into my life.
Love,
Yours forever,
Faith.”
She put the letter inside a plain white envelope and sealed it with a kiss and placed it inside her large pocket book. With a sigh she sat down on the couch and propped her feet on the ottoman and turn on the television. She felt as if her mother was smiling down from Heaven at her and telling her ‘good job’. She fell asleep on the couch and it was not until nine when she got up and got ready for bed; tomorrow was a big day and she had no intention of blowing it.
Chapter 9
She reached work especially early and went and put the letter on his desk; along with his appointments. She had put the letter in an envelope with his name on it coming from her. Her smile turned to anxiety as she looked at the clock and realized that it was past eight and he still had not shown up. Maybe he was not coming she thought worrying her bottom lip – then all this would have been for nothing.
He came in after nine and by that time she was in the middle of taking the particulars from a client and another waiting on her. He looked like he had slept in the clothes he had on and his hair was finger combed and a night’s growth of beard on his strong jaw. Faith’s heart twisted inside her and she wished she could just get up and go over to him and take him in her arms but she had to wait; dealing with the client was more important right now and besides as soon as he read the letter he would know how she felt about him.
He mumbled good morning and went straight into the office. It was half an hour later when she was on the phone that she saw him hurriedly leaving his office, closing the door behind him and left without saying a word to her. Strange, that was certainly not the result she expected but she did not have time to think about his strange behavior because just then, two more people came in.
It was not until she had a break during lunch time that she realized he still had not returned to the office. With a sigh of impatience she went into his office and to her consternation she discovered he had placed her letter in the middle of his desk calendar and it had not been opened. Her eyes widening in realization and it hit her that the letter probably meant something else to him – he probably thought it was a letter of resignation – Idiot! She thought in despair; the man was loco! Picking up the phone she called his cell phone and it went straight to voicemail. She made several more calls and the same thing happened. “Josh,” she said impatiently as the voicemail chipped in. “I am not resigning you idiot, can you please come back so that we can talk?” She hung up. Damn.
Before she had time to reflect further, another client came in and she was swamped from then until almost six o’clock. She was really starting to get concerned now; what if something happened to him. She thought, pacing the floor agitated. What if – no stop. She told herself furiously – he was okay, maybe he was just being a jerk and making her suffer. By six thirty, she was close to tears and just as she was reaching for the phone to call his mother; she saw the lights of his car as he turned into the parking lot.
Faith was furious. She had spent almost the entire day worrying about him and here he was safe and sound. She had a good mind to tear up the letter and leave and never come back.
He pushed the door open, surprised to see it unlocked and her standing just inside of it. “I thought you had left,” he told her wearily, making as if to pass her.
“How dare you!” she sputtered, grabbing him by the shirt. He stopped and gave her a startled look. “Do you have any idea how worried I was thinking something had happened to you?”
“I am sorry, I just had to get out and I did not want to see you leave,” he told her; his expression searching.
“You idiot!” she exploded, letting go of him and marching into his office, coming back out with the letter.
“Read it!” she demanded, shoving it in his hands.
“I d
on’t want to –“ he began.
“Read it, you damn idiot!” she said angrily, forcing him to take it.
“Okay,” he said, staring at her warily. He tore open the envelope and pulled out the thin sheet of paper, taking in the lip mark on the envelope. There was silence while he read to the very end and read it again; then he raised his eyes and stared at her; there was a suspicious sheen in his eyes as he kept looking at her. “You love me,” he said foolishly.
“Yes and fat load of good loving you did to me,” she grumbled, all of the anger draining from her body at his expression.
“You love me,” he said in wonder, his expression one of unbelievable tenderness. “I spent yesterday in abject misery and I came in today to find a letter from you on my desk; I almost died; I wanted to die because I thought I had lost you.” He slowly came towards her and stood before her; not touching her; just looking at her hungrily.
“I love you,” she told him huskily, reaching out a hand to touch his face. “I don’t want to spend another moment without you.”
With a groan he pulled her into his arms; just holding her to him; breathing in her special scent, burying his head into her hair. Then with an abrupt movement he picked her up in his arms and headed for the door, not even putting her down as he struggled to lock the door leading outside. He drove with one hand, his other hand capturing hers as if he was afraid she would disappear.
It was not until they had reached inside his house that he spoke. He picked her up again and took her upstairs to his bedroom. “I am afraid to leave you even for a minute,” he told her softly, as he placed her gently on his bed and took off her shoes.
“I am not going anywhere,” she told him as he stood before her. “I am here to stay.”
“I am trying to process that,” he slowly pulled off her dress, revealing a lacy black teddy underneath that left nothing to the imagination. “All this for me?” he teased her soberly.
“Yes, and I was beginning to think it was all for nothing when you didn't come back,” she retorted; her eyes slumberous as he stroked between her legs.
“I would have come back on any terms you wanted,” he murmured, holding her gaze as he rubbed her slowly. Her breathing was becoming erratic and she had a hard time concentrating on what he was saying. “I wanted you any way I could get you,” he added huskily; never taking his eyes off hers as he slipped two fingers between the silky material; touching her skin; slowly rubbing against her mound. “Anyway,” he plunged his fingers inside her, working her slowly at first then furiously, pulling her towards him and capturing her keening cries with his lips; his fingers moving inside her furiously as he brought her perilously close to the edge. He pulled out and moved away slightly, leaving her panting and aching for more; then she whimpered as he put his fingers to his lips and tasted her- she felt as if she was going to burst.
He quickly took off his clothes and joined her on the bed and as she made to take off her teddy he stopped her, kneeling before her and before she knew what he was doing he put his mouth on her, sucking her through the silk. It was unbelievably titillating. Faith grabbed his hair; her hips moving restlessly as he sucked her relentlessly. She came with a loud cry; her fingers digging into his scalp. He moved and knelt over her; eyeing the storm racing through her dark brown eyes, her hair wild around her flushed face and his heart ached within him. The thin straps had slid off her shoulders and the fabric barely held on to her hard nipples and he wanted to freeze frame her like that. “Please,” she begged huskily.
“Tell me,” he whispered huskily, his hand on his penis. “Tell me you love me.”
“I love you” she told him hoarsely. “I love you!”
With a broken cry he slipped between the lace and plunged inside her. Faith arched her back and wrapped her legs around his waist; her movements frantic.
“Easy baby,” he muttered as her tightness wrapped around him like a glove. He did not want it to end but he feared he was very close to losing control. He slowed down forcing her to do the same; capturing her mouth in a tender soul searching kiss; his mouth moving over hers with a tenderness that defied description. Faith broke and the tears came. She was in love with this wonderful man and it felt too good to be true. They moved in unison; their bodies molding together in the age old dance of love. He stopped for a moment but continued kissing her; his hands holding her face in place. Faith held him to her; responding to his tenderness with her own; then he started moving, painstakingly slow at first as if drawing out the moment then the momentum built up and his hips moved furiously; they came together and he shuddered against her, crying out her name over and over again as he emptied himself inside her.
He moved off her and pulled her into the circle of his arms; his breathing still shallow. Faith nestled against him; contented.
After a while, he looked over at her. “It’s getting late, maybe you should leave now,” he said casually, waiting with bated breath for her response.
“I am not leaving,” she told him drowsily.
His heart skipped a beat and he closed his eyes in immense relief. “I am glad,” he said thickly; his hand stroking her abundance of curls. “I want to marry you,”
“I want that too,” she murmured, shocking him further. He tensed and paused in the act of pushing her hair away from her face.
“You do?” he said uncertainly as she angled her head to look up at him.
“Didn’t you read my letter?” she asked in amusement. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“Faith,” he breathed; resting his head on her forehead. “You have just made me the happiest man in the entire world.”
“You do the same for me,” she murmured, capturing his mouth with hers as she kissed him tenderly.
“How does the next three weeks sound,” he asked her huskily.
“It sounds – what?” Faith reared up and looked at him incredulously.
“You expect me to plan a wedding in three weeks?”
“You would have lots of help and besides I can’t wait to marry you,” he laughed at her expression. “I don’t want a big wedding I want a lasting marriage.”
“Spoken like a true male,” Faith grumbled good-naturedly. “Three weeks it is and if I show up at the altar looking like a bedraggled bride, blame it on yourself.”
“You will always be beautiful and you don’t even have to try.” He told her huskily; one hand stroking her breast.
“A June wedding it is,” she murmured as she succumbed to his lovemaking.
*****
The weeks came and went so fast, Faith found herself wondering if three weeks was really enough time to plan a wedding. His mother had taken on the catering and decorating the church along with her church members and Maureen came back that weekend to help her find a dress and a maid of honor dress for herself.
“I told you there would be a wedding soon,” she grinned at her friend in triumph. She looked tanned and happy and told Faith her honeymoon was the most magical experience she had ever had. “You and Josh should think of going,”
“Maybe,” Faith said distractedly. The office had picked up more and they had their hands full with clients. She had suggested to Josh that it was time they got someone to help them out and he had told her to go ahead.
The wedding was set for June 21st at 1p.m. with the reception following at the same hotel Maureen had had hers. She and her friend were out on their lunch break looking for dresses and Faith was getting discourage until they came to a small store nestled between a barber shop and an ice cream parlor. The dresses were one of a kind and even though the prices were a little bit exorbitant they were worth every penny. Faith found the dress. It was an off the shoulder cream Venetian lace and it drifted down gently to her ankles; the bodice hugging her lovingly. “You look like a dream,” Maureen breathed, staring at her friend. The fabric looked striking against her coffee and cream complexion and her wild black curls.
“Fabulous!” the proprietor clapped her hand
s gleefully, her eyes flashing in admiration. “My dear this was made for you.”
She found an emerald green silk gown for Maureen that flattered her slightly plump figure. Faith had decided to forgo the veil and instead she went for the sparkling tiara. She would wear a pearl necklace and drop earrings and cream satin shoes.
They left the store; loaded down with their purchases and with a quick hug and promises to talk later Faith hurried back to the office. She had promised Josh that she would not be too long, served him right for expecting her to plan a wedding in three weeks.
He was busy dealing with clients and she slipped inside his office to put down the shopping bags. “Got everything you need?” he murmured as she stood beside him ready to take over.
“Yes,” she told him. “Did Mr. Butler call back?” she asked anxiously. They were expecting a call from a new client and she had told Josh to let her know as soon as he called.
“He did,” Joshua nodded to the woman waiting on one of the chairs. “And someone is here to see you,” he indicated with his head at the woman seated.
“Gladys,” Faith exclaimed hurrying over to her. “I didn’t see you when I came in,” she sat beside her and took both hands in hers. “How are you?”
“I am doing well, thank you,” she said looking at the girl kindly. “And I hear congratulations are in order – you’re getting married to that fine young man.”
“Yes I am,” Faith laughed. “And I am up to my neck in wedding arrangements.”
“I am happy for you my dear,” she told the girl sincerely. “I am almost sorry to tell you my news.”
“What news?”
“I am no longer working, it was a temporary position,” Gladys shook her head. “Now I am job hunting again.”
Suddenly a brilliant idea flashed inside her head. “Stay right here Gladys, I’ll be right back,” Leaving the startled woman staring after her, she hurried to Josh. He was in his office after he had finished dealing with the client who had already left.
Love So Heavenly (A Clean Christian African American Romance) Page 21
