If Memory Serves

by Vanessa Davis Griggs

  “Honestly, you’re just doing what you think is right. Johnnie Mae, I have to believe our baby is going to be all right even being born this early. Dr. Baker explained everything to me—the best- and worst-case scenario for both you and the baby. So I know that if you don’t have the baby within the next few hours, there’s a good chance you’re not going to make it through tomorrow. I’m not going to sugarcoat this situation at this point. And that possibility, Johnnie Mae, is not fair to Princess Rose . . . or to this baby or . . .” His voice started to trail off. He wiped one of his eyes.

  She touched his face as she tilted her head. “Or to you,” she whispered, finishing a statement she knew he probably wouldn’t. “I’m not being fair to you, either.”

  He looked at her. “I love you, Johnnie Mae. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. A long, healthy life. I want your children to know and hear you, and not hear about you from other people. Both children. And personally, Johnnie Mae, I’m not willing to put your life on the line when there’s another way we can do this that can possibly save both you and the baby. I prayed about this before I ever opened my mouth to tell Dr. Baker it was all right to do it. It’s still all in God’s hands.”

  “Landris, I know. I know this has to be hard on you, too. I just can’t help but wonder, by doing this now, does this mean we don’t trust that God will take care of it?”

  “Johnnie Mae, I believe this is God’s way of taking care of it. God still has to guide Dr. Baker and that medical team’s hands. We’re not doubting God any less going this route. In fact, I believe we have to trust Him that much more. We must trust God to go in that operating room and do what man has no control over. We still have to have faith—the working kind of faith . . . unwavering faith.”

  Johnnie Mae smiled and caressed his face. “Are you going to be there with me?”

  He hugged her. “We’re one. That means where one goes, the other must follow. We’re in this together. Yes, I’m going to be right there by your side, holding your hand.”

  “Is it possible for me to see Princess Rose before I do this?”

  He smiled and stood up straight. “Sure. I’ll go get her.”

  “Landris . . . will you call my mother for me? I can’t talk to her right now.” Her voice was breaking up as she spoke. “Will you call her for me, and if it seems like she’s okay, and if she feels up to it, will you see if someone will bring her here for me?” She glanced down at her now-clasped hands.

  “Of course. I’ll call her,” he said, then pulled out his cell phone and pressed the number to speed-dial.

  Chapter 29

  For He put on righteousness as a breastplate, and a helmet of salvation upon His head; and He put on the garments of vengeance for clothing, and was clad with zeal as a cloak.

  Isaiah 59:17

  Sarah was now resting at home. She’d stayed in the hospital for two days. Memory and Lena had stayed with her during those days. Sometimes taking turns, sometimes there at the same time.

  “You know what I’d like for us to do,” Sarah said to Memory and Lena. “I’d like to celebrate Christmas . . . here . . . together.”

  Lena smiled. “I’m sure we can do that. Christmas is some six months away. We can have a grand Christmas celebration.”

  “Sounds like a lot of fun to me,” Memory said.

  Sarah began to shake her head. “No, I don’t mean wait until December. I mean, I want to celebrate Christmas now.”

  “Now? But it’s June,” Memory said.

  “I know it’s June,” Sarah said with a sheepish grin. “But who says we can only celebrate Christmas in December? What about we celebrate it this month? Lena, didn’t you and Richard get married in June?”

  Lena nodded. “Yeah. Both Theresa and I will be celebrating our anniversary on June twenty-second.”

  “Then would you like to have a Christmas-like celebration on your anniversary, or would it be best not to mix them?” Sarah asked as she brushed a strand of hair out of her face.

  “I think it would be best not to mix them,” Memory said, although the question wasn’t addressed to her. “Lena and Theresa may want to spend that special time with their husbands,” she quickly added.

  “Oh dear,” Sarah said. “I suppose that is selfish of me to wish to impose on their anniversary date with my own desire.”

  “No, I think it’s a great idea. I can run it by Richard to be sure it’s okay with him, and, of course, Theresa and Maurice, since we’re looking for this to be a family affair. But if you want to have Christmas in June, and you’d like to include our anniversary, it’s fine with me,” Lena said.

  Memory got up and looked at the calendar pinned on Sarah’s bedroom wall. “Did you know June twenty-fifth is a Saturday?”

  “Really?” Sarah said. “Well, that would be even better! We would be celebrating Christmas exactly six months ahead of time if we go with that date. Let’s do it then. Let’s shoot to celebrate our own special Christmas celebration June twenty-fifth.”

  Lena took Sarah’s hand and patted it. “If that’s what you want, Grandmother.”

  “I’ll let Minnie know so she can get the place changed around. Oh, and can one of you call Polly and ask her to get in touch with the people she usually gets to come in and decorate the house for Christmas for me? Polly’s number is in my address book in this nightstand drawer.” She patted the nightstand, then clapped her hands as she began to laugh. “Oh, I just believe this is going to be the best Christmas ever! Ever!”

  Memory smiled at Sarah. “I can’t wait,” she said.

  When Memory and Lena left Sarah’s room, they stopped when they were farther down the hallway.

  “What do you really think?” Memory asked Lena. “Why do you think she wants to do this now?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Do you think she’s getting ready to leave us or something?” Memory asked.

  Lena looked at her mother and shook her head. “Honestly, I don’t know. But if this is what she wants to do, there’s no downside to doing it. I say, let’s do all we can to make this the best Christmas celebration ever.”

  Chapter 30

  And the loftiness of man shall be bowed down, and the haughtiness of men shall be made low: and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day.

  Isaiah 2:17

  “Richard, what did you do with that box?” Lena asked. “What box?”

  She pushed both fists into her waistline. “The Wings of Grace box. You know, it was on the bed. I left it on the bed when all the commotion was going on to get Sarah to the hospital a few days ago. When I came home, it was gone. I figured you put it up.”

  He shook his head. “It wasn’t me. I haven’t seen it since you showed it to me that one time. I didn’t even know you brought it here with you.”

  “Are you sure you didn’t move it? It was right there on the bed.”

  “Lena, I might be getting old, but I’d remember if I’d seen that box and put it somewhere.”

  Lena looked in the drawer where she had originally placed it, then other drawers throughout the bedroom. She looked in the closet and under the bed.

  “Are you sure you had it in here last?” Richard asked as he began searching the uncluttered room.

  Lena stopped and stared at him. “I’m sure. It was right there on that bed. Memory and I were in here talking. In fact . . .” She suddenly stopped talking, went to the bed, dropped to her knees once more, and began looking under the bed.

  “Why are you looking under the bed again?” Richard asked. “It’s not that small of a box you wouldn’t have seen it the first time you looked.”

  She stood up. “I was looking for the Alexandrite necklace,” she said.

  “The Alexandrite necklace? Okay, now I’m really confused.”

  “The Alexandrite necklace.” Lena walked over to him. “Memory gave it back to me. The same day I showed her the Wings of Grace box. Gayle came in while we were talking and told us Sarah was sick and needed us to
come quickly. Memory and I jumped up and left everything right where it was. The Alexandrite necklace . . . the box . . .”

  “All right, come sit down,” Richard said, grabbing her by the hand and pulling her down on the bed with him. “Now, did you come back here after you left to go see about Sarah? You know, to get your purse when you got ready to go to the hospital that night?”

  Lena thought for a second. “I didn’t need a purse because we rode to the hospital with Gayle. I had about thirty dollars in my pocket from when you gave me back my change after you went to the store for me,” Lena said, “so I didn’t have to come in here.”

  “All right. So you didn’t come back in the room at all after you left until . . .”

  “Until you and I came home later that night.” Lena began to shake her head slowly. “When we got home, it was late. I was tired, and I pretty much crashed. I didn’t think about them because I guess I thought you had put them away or something.” She shrugged her shoulders, then shook her head even more. “I don’t believe this. I just don’t believe it. She did it to me again.”

  “Who did what to you again?”

  “Memory. If you didn’t move the box and the necklace, then that can only mean she must have sneaked back in here at some point and took them both.”

  “But when would Memory have had a chance to do that? If you both were in here together, you both went to see about Sarah, you went to the hospital together, and you came home before she did that night,” Richard said, “when could she have done it?”

  Lena turned more to face him. “I don’t know when she did it. Maybe while I was watching them put Sarah in the ambulance. I can’t remember if Memory was there with me during those fifteen to twenty minutes or not.”

  He took her hand and held it. “Tell me what you were saying about the necklace.”

  Lena started talking, moving her hand up and down as she spoke. “Memory and I came in here to talk. I was going to tell her about the box her grandmother, Grace, left for us to open together—that third Wings of Grace box. But before I could do that, Memory pulled out the Alexandrite necklace and handed it to me.”

  “But how? I thought she turned that necklace in for the million-dollar reward.”

  “I don’t know how she did it, and I didn’t get a chance to find out. All I know is that she said she wanted to give it back to me,” Lena said. “She claimed she wanted to make things right between us. All of us. I gave it back to her. She laid it on the bed.”

  “If that’s the case, then why would she take it? Lena, that doesn’t make sense.”

  Lena had a smirk on her face. “Because she’s trying to convince me she has changed when she really hasn’t, that’s why. And to think I almost believed her, too.”

  “Lena, listen. I don’t think you should jump to any immediate conclusions about Memory, the necklace, or that box. I’m sure there’s some kind of a logical explanation.”

  “Like?”

  “Like maybe someone else saw them and put them up for you. But you should ask Memory before you get all worked up about it. She may have just put them up to keep them safe, and in the commotion—like you forgot—maybe she forgot to tell you.”

  Lena stood and started toward the door.

  “Where are you going?” Richard asked.

  “To ask her. I’m going to settle this once and for all.”

  Lena went to Memory’s closed door. Standing and about to knock, she could hear Memory talking to someone. Detecting only one voice, she concluded Memory was on the phone. She started to walk away, when suddenly she stopped in her tracks.

  “Sam, I told you. I’m sorry I just got a chance to call. It’s been crazy around here. But guess what? I got it back,” Memory said in a slightly muffled but audible voice. “It took some doing, but I got the Alexandrite necklace back. More than that: an early July ninth birthday present to me. Only thing is, I think I may be in a slight pickle. You know, a bit of a jam. All right, in plain English . . . in trouble.”

  Having heard enough, Lena turned around and rushed back to her room.

  “That was quick,” Richard said. “What happened? Was she busy? Not there?”

  Lena fell into his arms. “Just hold me, please. Hold me, okay?”

  “What happened? Did you get to talk to Memory and ask if she took them?”

  Lena pulled herself away from his embrace. “I didn’t have to. I was standing outside her door about to knock. I heard her on the phone. She was telling someone named Sam that she’d gotten the necklace back.” Lena laid her head back on Richard’s shoulder. “If she took the necklace, Richard, then she took the box as well.”

  Richard rubbed her back as she cried. “I’m sorry, Lena girl. I’m so sorry.”

  Chapter 31

  So shall they fear the name of the Lord from the west, and His glory from the rising of the sun. When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord shall lift up a standard against him.

  Isaiah 59:19

  “Lena, would you like to tell me what’s bothering you?” Sarah asked as she sat propped up in her bed.

  “Nothing,” Lena said.

  “Listen, dear. I’ve been around a long while. I can tell when someone has something on their mind. Now, if you just don’t want to share it with me, that’s one thing. But to tell me it’s nothing is just not true, and you and I both know that.”

  Lena forced a smile. “I really don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Well, all right then. But if you’re worried about me, I’m feeling so much better. It was a blessing having you and Memory here with me throughout this ordeal.” Sarah pushed her body up to sit more erect. “Every time I opened my eyes in that hospital room, one or both of you were there. I had to remind myself it was real . . . that I wasn’t dreaming.”

  Lena leaned over and patted her on her hand. “I’m glad, Grandmother.”

  Sarah looked toward the window. “It’s a beautiful day today. I’d really love to go outside.” She turned back and smiled at Lena. “Do you think we could all eat out on the terrace for lunch today? Just us girls—me, you, and Memory. I’m not trying to cut Richard out, I’d just like it to be only us three.”

  “If you want to do that, I don’t see why we can’t. The doctor said that the more you get up and move around, the better it will be for you.” Lena stood up. “And you know Richard practically lives on the golf course these days, so he’s already up and gone. But I’ll let Monica know,” she said, referring to the cook. “Is there anything special you’d like her to fix for lunch?”

  Sarah shook her head. “No. But before you leave, sit back down and let’s talk.”

  Lena came back and sat down.

  Sarah reached over and grabbed her hand once more. “Lena, I know you and Memory have had your seasons of being angry.”

  Lena tried, but couldn’t help it. She turned away just from the mention of Memory’s name.

  “Lena, look at me. I don’t know what has happened recently, but you can’t keep letting things fester between you and your mother.” She patted Lena’s hand twice, then released it. “A few days ago you and Memory seemed to be really connecting. What has happened, seemingly in one day, that changed things?”

  Lena stood up again. She didn’t want to be close enough for Sarah to look in her eyes. “Nothing, Grandmother. Now, I really need to go let Memory and Monica know about our lunch plans. I’ll ask Monica to fix some of your favorite dishes.”

  “Lena, I love you,” Sarah said as she stared at her. “But I love Memory, too. Yes, she’s done some pretty horrible things. Yes, she’s disappointed a lot of people. Yes, she’s hurt people I care deeply about. But Lena, in loving Memory I have to let all those things go. In loving Memory, I have to learn to forgive. In loving Memory, I have to give her a chance to prove that she’s really changed, and I have to do that without holding back any of myself or my heart. If I don’t, I may miss out on things and moments I can never get back.” Sarah reached her hand
out to Lena. “I’ve missed too much already. I don’t want to live out the remainder of whatever time I have distrusting or guarding my heart. Because in doing that, I limit the joy I could experience. I want to feel it all. And if that means having to take the good with the bad, then so be it. If in loving Memory it means I may be hurt, then I’ll just have to take that chance.”

  Lena squeezed her hand. “I’m glad you can do that,” Lena said.

  “Talk to her,” Sarah said sternly. “Tell her what you think. Tell her how you feel. Give her a chance. Fight for what’s right. We must stop letting the devil win.”

  “Has Memory said something to you?” Lena asked out of curiosity.

  “No. But I can feel the difference in you both. I asked her about you last night, and she became instantly sad. Her whole countenance changed. When I asked her what had happened between you two, she told me she didn’t know . . . that you had abruptly shut down on her, and she was at a loss as to what had occurred to cause it.”

  “Is that what she told you?”

  “Lena, I don’t believe she’s the same woman anymore that you believe her to be.”

  Lena took her hand back. “How do you know that, Grandmother? You’ve only known her for less than two weeks. You don’t know how manipulative she can be. You don’t know how she can make you think she really cares about you only to stab you in the back when you least expect it.” Lena saw the shocked look come over Sarah’s face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I don’t mean to upset you. You don’t need this now. I apologize.”

  “It’s okay. I’m strong enough to hear this. But will you trust me on this? At least tell Memory what’s bothering you in regards to her. You may discover this is all some big misunderstanding. If you talk about it, you won’t lose precious time that honestly can never be gotten back. Confrontation is not always a bad thing. I learned that when I had to go against Montgomery and the others to take back what was rightfully mine. It would have been easy to just walk away. Sometimes we have to meet a thing head-on.”