Down With the King of the South

by Diamond Johnson

  Look at me for example. For the past two weeks since Trip and I had gotten into it over the phone, I swore that I hated him and that I was done, but come next weekend, I would be the first one on the road to see him Saturday for visitation.

  Giovonni “Trip” Young

  I stayed up all night last night. One would think that I was a kid getting ready to go to Disney World or some shit in the morning. Truth is, today was visitation, and my girl and my son were coming to see me, so it felt similar to a kid about to go to Disney World. The shit was a magical experience to me, just like Disney World.

  I loved visitation day, especially when I got the chance to see my family. I hadn’t seen them in a little over two weeks. Two weeks ago, that’s when Jashae was complaining about being tired, and last week I couldn’t have her come because let’s just say that I was thrown off a little bit by the visitation days. My girl would have come down to the prison and saw that I had another bitch in visiting me, and it would have been lights off for everybody.

  I loved the fuck out of Jashae, but these days, it felt like her ass was too busy for a nigga, so I had to explore different options. A nigga got lonely in this bitch, and Jashae didn’t always run to the phone when I called like she used to, so I had to start running after different bitches. Even as a nigga behind these walls serving a fuckin’ life sentence. That still didn’t keep the bitches away. Bitches flocked to me like flies on a shit pile. I can’t even begin to describe the many letters that I receive a day from desperate ass women on the outside of these walls who had somehow managed to find my jail information online and were writing me, wanting to be my girl and shit.

  I didn’t love any of those women, but I also wouldn’t lie and say that I wasn’t entertaining them. My biggest entertainment of them all was this fine ass, thick ass bitch who was coming in my cell right now to let me know that my visitors were here. Her name was Officer Hill, but to me, she was Raynell. Fine ass bitch who was risking her freedom and her job by fuckin’ around with me.

  I had shorty doing all type of bad shit for me. She was sneaking me out of my cell so that we could go somewhere and fuck, and she was the one who had gotten me this Android phone; she was basically giving me the special treatment. Raynell was a good girl, but I was turning shorty the fuck out. She started working here about a year ago, and I believe the worst thing that could have happened to her was meeting me. I knew I wasn’t any good for her.

  As much as I wanted to let her go sometimes, because if she were to get caught, she would be thrown in a cell just like I was, I just couldn’t. I had become so used to our little thing. That little thing where she would come scoop me out of my cell, pretending that I was going to see the nurse, but in actuality, we would sneak somewhere, and she would give me the fuck of a lifetime. I was in this bitch for the rest of my life, which meant that if I didn’t keep fuckin’ Raynell, I wasn’t going to get pussy again a day of my life.

  The prison where I was, we didn’t have the luxury of having conjugal visits, so the most I got out of my girl was a tongue kiss, and when she wasn’t acting all scary, she would let me finger her under the table. That was only when she would come and visit me by herself though. I knew what Jashae’s pussy looked, tasted, even felt like, so on visitation day, I would want nothing else in the world than for her to let me slip up inside it, but Jashae wasn’t on that shit.

  All the niggas that I fucked with in there knew how to get by on the officers. We all knew about going behind that wall in the visitation room for a little quickie, but no matter how many times I tried to convince Jashae to do it, she would never agree.

  “Your bitch and your son are here,” was the first thing that Raynell said when she walked into the cell.

  She was in her brown, correctional officer uniform that fit good as hell on her body. No woman that I’ve seen in this uniform could wear that shit like Raynell. She had a tiny waist and some wide hips with a fat ass on her. If I had to guess, I would think she was about 5’6”, maybe one hundred and fifty pounds. Her ass and her titties made up a lot of her weight. Because the women had to usually wear their hair up, today she had her thick hair pulled back into a bun. With her hair pulled back, you got to see the youthfulness of her face because she was only twenty-seven, while I was thirty-two.

  “Ay, watch your fuckin’ mouth. You’re my bitch! The woman out there is my girl, the mother of my child, all of that. If you don’t want to be tasting the bottom of my shoe, you will watch your mouth.” I grilled her ass.

  We had a little mirror inside the cell that honestly wasn’t big enough for you to see shit, but I still worked with what I had, just to make sure that I looked good for my girl. I was now rocking a bald head, and I was dressed in the gray sweatsuit that they afforded us along with some sneakers that I cleaned up nicely last night with a toothbrush and some soap. I looked as good as my circumstances would allow me to.

  “Wow! Just the other day she was all type of bitches, but now you find yourself having some respect for her. I swear you’re a fuckin’ joke,” she said with a roll of those big ass eyes of hers.

  “Yeah, well you fuckin’ the shit out of this joke! I can call her every bitch in the fuckin’ world, but you can’t. Let’s go. I don’t want to keep my family waiting,” I said and slapped her on her ass then walked out of the cell.

  I’ll admit, I had a really bad habit of voicing the frustrations that I had with Jashae to Raynell. Jashae not coming to see me two weeks ago when I was expecting her presence had me pissed like a motha fucka, so the next day, I ended up giving Raynell an earful. I called Jashae everything except a child of God. I was over that now, though, because she was here now. I walked with Raynell behind me like I owned this bitch. Like I was back in the hood, walking down my old projects, niggas hollered out Trip, as they stood up in their cells, hands hanging on the cell gates like we were fuckin’ animals.

  I don’t care what no one says, the moment you enter a prison, you lose any right of being a fuckin’ human being. We get treated like animals in this bitch, especially when we have to go to solitary confinement. We get handed our food up under the fuckin’ door like we’re dogs. We’re locked up inside a little ass room for twenty-three hours out of the fuckin’ day. I hated this shit, man.

  My girl thought that a nigga was insensitive when it comes to her feelings, but the truth is, if I ever beg Jashae to come and see about a nigga, it’s because I need her ass. Two weeks ago, when I was damn near begging Jashae to come and see me was because a day before that, I had thoughts of suicide. Being behind these walls can turn the hardest of the hardest nigga soft. I missed my motha fuckin’ family. One wrong mistake, and I had to pay for this shit with my life.

  Anyone who knows me knows that I would never harm a child. Yeah, I’ve told a few bitches here and there to get an abortion, but nothing worse than that. That little girl, Bria, that I murdered, I swear that wasn’t my intention. I was going after her bitch ass daddy. My wild, ‘I don’t give a fuck’ attitude is what landed me in this bitch. I should have made sure the nigga that I was gunning for was inside the house before I just started shooting. I turned myself in because the police were going to pick me up regardless.

  It crossed my mind to go on the run with my girl, but if we were to get caught, they would have taken Jashae down with me, and I was too real of a nigga to put my girl in a position like that. I wasn’t okay with the fact that I’d murdered a little girl. Nobody knew about the fucked-up nightmares that I had in the middle of the night, where Bria would be standing over me with blood all over her body, screaming and crying to me, asking me why I took her away from her family. What about the dreams that I had of niggas busting in my girl’s house and murdering her and my son?

  My depression and anxiety were real. I thought that I was the better man by stepping up to the plate and telling the detectives that it was my gun that killed Bria, but that fuck ass judge still ended up giving me life.

  It took us about three more minutes to mak
e it to the visitation room. My eyes worked well, so I scanned the big ass room until they finally landed on Jashae and Vonte. When Jashae saw me, the biggest smile formed on her beautiful ass face, making my cold heart turn warm. I didn’t deserve that fuckin’ woman, I swear I didn’t. I have been back and forth with this woman since we were kids, man. She could literally have any man in the fuckin’ world, yet she was slumming this shit out with me.

  I had to be selfish in this situation, though. I couldn’t let Jashae go even if I tried. You can’t be from Miami and say that you didn’t know that Jashae was my girl. Any nigga who would try to get with her would be doing that shit as some type of get back on me, or they obviously didn’t value their life because if I even hear from somebody that she was entertaining the next dude, it was lights out for them with just one simple phone call.

  Jashae looked the same way she did back in high school, just more mature. She always had that long ass hair, and she would lay her head on me at night, take my hand from wherever it was, and force a nigga to massage her scalp. Jashae was short, maybe 5’4”, with a little frame on her, but her ass poked out, depending on the type of jeans that she wore. She had some beautiful ass chocolate skin with a pair of light brown eyes. Nice, white teeth, with that one deep dimple in her left cheek.

  Today, she was plainly dressed in a denim shirt with matching denim jeans and a pair of Gucci tennis shoes on her feet. Jashae knew that I was a sucker for seeing her with her hair straightened, so that’s how she rocked it, with it hanging down past the middle of her back. Our handsome son was standing beside her, towering over her little ass. He was every bit of me, but he was so much better than me, even when I was his age.

  At seventeen, I had barely graduated high school because I rarely went. All I wanted to do was stand on the corner and push dope, be a part of a gang, and participate in robberies. At that time, Vonte was two, so every bad thing that I was doing, I convinced myself that I was doing it to get money so I could buy him shit like pampers, but actually, I was doing the shit because I wanted to.

  Once I was close enough to them, I walked over to my girl. She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I lifted her up in my arms. I could give two fucks about the no touching rule. I hadn’t seen her beautiful ass in weeks, so I was going to take advantage of it.

  “Young!” one of the lame ass male security guards yelled when he saw how close I was up on Jashae.

  She was in my arms, and my hands were glued to her ass, so to him, we were damn near fuckin’. I could tell that his ass didn’t get any pussy after a long day’s work. His name was Officer Hamilton, and he took his job way too fuckin’ serious. I hated when he was the one over visitation. When my boy, Officer Fisher, was running visitation, he’d allow me to have my tongue all down Jashae’s throat and wouldn’t trip about the shit either.

  Jashae kissed my lips about three times, and then I finally put her back on her feet. I went over to my son, hugged him, kissed the top of his head, and then we all sat down.

  “I see you remembered how to find a nigga. I haven’t seen you in two weeks,” was the first thing I said to Jashae when we all sat down.

  She was sitting on the same bench as I was since she couldn’t be out of my personal space whenever we were around each other, while Vonte sat on the other bench that was in front of us.

  “It could have been a week, but I guess you had someone else on the visitation list to come and see you last weekend,” she shot with a smirk on her face and a roll of her eyes.

  You see, Jashae didn’t know that I was fuckin’ with other bitches behind her back, but she threw out little shit here and there, that led me to believe that she knew something. Just like a while back on the phone, when she said something about a bitch smuggling a phone in here for me. Like, how the fuck did she even know that?

  “There you go with your bullshit. You found a dress yet for the homecoming? Son, why you taking her old ass with you anyway? Should have told her to sit her ass at home and wait until you got back,” I joked, and they both laughed.

  “Old? Nigga, I can still pass for sixteen. People don’t even believe me when I say that I’m thirty,” she boasted.

  “Oh yeah? What people? Niggas be saying that shit to you?” I asked, turning around and looking down at her.

  “Niggas and women. Don’t do this right now, Trip. Damn, we haven’t even been here for five minutes and you already trying to start something,” she voiced.

  Jashae tried to move and sit on the other side with Vonte, but I put my hand on her waist, sitting her back down on the seat with me.

  “I ain’t starting shit. You need to stop smiling in them niggas’ faces and entertaining them. Of course, they going to say you look sixteen. That’s the type of corny ass shit a nigga says when he wants some pussy,” I barked at her.

  “Yeah, well you would know, right? And just so you know, I don’t entertain no other niggas, only your stupid ass,” she said.

  I could already tell the direction that this visit was going in, so I was going to stop talking to her before I hurt her feelings.

  “How was last night’s game, Vonte?” I asked, switching gears and talking to my son.

  “It was good. I have no doubts about us going to the championship. It’ll be like two weeks after homecoming if we make it,” he proudly said.

  “That’s what’s up. What’s going on with you and your girlfriend? I hope your little ass is wrapping your dick up. You ain’t got time to be nobody’s fuckin’ daddy,” I preached.

  “I hear you, Dad,” he responded.

  For the rest of the thirty minutes, just Vonte and I talked to each other. Mentally, Jashae had checked out a long time ago. When it was time for them to leave, she really tried to walk away and not give me a hug before she left. When Vonte wasn’t looking, I grabbed her by her arm, and I roughly pulled her into me. My mouth went toward her ear, and I bit down on it, applying just a little bit of pressure.

  “Ima call you tonight. We need to talk about you and this fucked up attitude that you been having lately. You moody like a motha fucka, yo. One minute you happy and kissing on a nigga, and the next you hate me. You can’t love me and hate me at the same time, shorty. Pick a side. Fix your fuckin’ attitude too,” I snapped and kissed her jaw then I let her go.

  I stood up against the wall with the rest of the inmates and watched as she and Vonte walked out. I was so cold toward Jashae these days because I felt like I was losing her. I didn’t see the love anymore in her eyes for me, so these days, I felt like I was forcing her to love me. Once we’d walked back to our cells and I was in my bed, or what was supposed to have been a bed but was just a hard ass mattress, I placed my hand behind my head.

  “You think she’s acting cold toward you now, imagine how she’ll be once she starts fuckin’ Miami. If she loves you so much, then why was Miami coming out of her house a few nights ago?” Raynell said from the other side of my cell.

  I never got the chance to ask her how the fuck she knew that because she’d walked away. Raynell had family in Miami, so maybe they told her. I haven’t run with Miami in years. I used to be close with bruh, that was until his ass thought he was too good for a nigga, and he couldn’t indulge in the shit that I was doing. He started boxing professionally and just forgot where the fuck he came from.

  When he first moved to Lincoln field apartments, and he didn’t know anybody, I welcomed that bitch ass nigga with open arms because I knew how it felt to be a new kid and not know anyone. I introduced that nigga to my homies, even let him meet Jashae. The older we got, he and I just started doing our own thing. His mind was set on doing what he had to do so that he could go to college one day and box, while I, on the other hand, had different plans.

  I’d just started up a gang, and we were doing all type of reckless shit. Because he and I were on two different things, we kind of just fell out. I didn’t really fuck with that nigga. He walked around this bitch like he was a fuckin’ king or some shit. He had bitches
too, which is why I don’t see the reason for Jashae to be just another notch on his fuckin’ belt. Nah, my bitch would never switch sides and fuck the used to be homie like that. Nahhhh, not my shorty.

  I was going to give Jashae the benefit of the doubt and say that Raynell had the wrong house and the wrong bitch. Miami damn sure wasn’t going to visit my girl and my son. That’s like the motha fucka committing suicide.

  Giovonte Young

  “You look beautiful, ma,” I said as I stood at the bottom of the staircase watching my ole girl as she came down the stairs.

  Her olive green dress matched my olive green suit perfectly. Swear she looked like a fuckin’ queen as she made her way down the stairs. The dress she wore was simple yet so fuckin’ beautiful on her. It was a long gown that was strapless, and it had a little slit on the left side of it. My great grandmother and my pop pop along with Mahogany all stood alongside me, and we all watched my ole girl as she damn near floated down the stairs.

  I was happy about this night for many reasons. The main reason being that I got to give my ole girl some shit that she never got to participate in before. When I found out that she’d never been to homecoming, prom, or other senior shit that I was participating in this year, it’s like it naturally came to me to extend the invitation, and as much as she tried to turn it down, I wasn’t taking no for an answer. I loved the fuck out of my ole boy, but as I found out more shit about him these days, I was beginning to resent his ass.

  I hated the power and control that he had over my ole girl. Was the nigga that fuckin’ insecure, that at twenty years old, he wouldn’t allow my ole girl to go to her homecoming? I didn’t know the whole story, but I felt like it was because of his ass that my ole girl missed out on so much. As her son, I was going to pick up where the nigga lacked, though, starting with tonight by bringing her along with me to the dance.