The Second Civil War- The Complete History

by Adam Yoshida

  Sitting behind the keyboard won’t be enough this time, he thought.

  He flipped to another set of Twitter feeds. This one was filled with pictures of the mob descending upon the Capitol, demanding that the Congress accede to the President’s demands and pass his bill immediately.

  They don’t speak for me, he thought as he watched the pictures and short clips fill his screen.

  Reviving a tired old war cry, the protests that were descending upon DC were being organized around the hashtag #occupythecapitol.

  What classic third-world behavior, Green thought with contempt, the unwashed mob descending upon the capital to demand that everyone comply with the demands of the caudillo.

  “It’s time that we #defendthecaptiol,” he Tweeted.

  Within thirty seconds, Green’s tweet was re-tweeted by a well-known conservative lawyer and author.

  “YES. LET’S DO IT. RT @martingreen442 It’s time that we #defendthecapitol.”

  That lawyer, as it happened, had 1.2 million followers.

  U.S. Senate

  “Will the Senator yield?” asked Mansour Bey, the junior Senator from Massachusetts.

  “For what purpose does the Senator from Massachusetts ask that I yield?” asked Reinhardt.

  “For a question,” replied Bey.

  “I will yield for a question,” said Senator Reinhardt.

  “Does the Senator not feel that his action – in adopting such full-bodied tactics of delay at this particular moment in our history – places purely partisan considerations ahead of national ones?”

  “Mr. President,” began Reinhardt, “I do not feel that is the case at all. I believe that this is a manufactured crisis whose real aim is to change our form of government. The Founders, in their wisdom, designed a government that was meant to be slow – that was meant to be subject to delays, second consideration, and to tangled bickering. This was not an accident. The institutions of the republic, especially insofar as domestic affairs are concerned, were never designed with expediency as the objective. The Founders did not mean to create a government that would do as much as possible, they meant to create a government that would be capable of doing as little as necessary.”

  “The Constitution is meant to be obstructionist. The aim of the Constitution and our government is not to see to it that every whim of a temporary majority is immediately enacted into law, it is to ensure that our liberties are effectively safeguarded from tyranny.”

  That brought shouts from the Democratic Senators present.

  “Oh, Mr. President, I know that I’m not supposed to talk about tyranny. That’s supposed to be a “triggering” word that motivates extremists into action. In fact, according to this Administration, you can even go to jail for such talk! Though the Constitution says that that is not so in this particular place, I wouldn’t be shocked to see them ignore even that.”

  U.S. House of Representatives

  Every pizza place and cocaine dealer in the DC metro area was working overtime as the House remained in session into the evening. The talking filibuster begun by Senator Reinhardt had managed to slow proceedings in the Senate enough for Rickover and the rest of the Republican rebels to begin to assemble their forces.

  As midnight came and went, the proceedings in the Senate intensified as seven other Republican Senators came to the floor to join in with the Senator from Michigan. With that many Senators in support of the filibuster – and with the social media momentum behind it making it certain that others would join – there would be enough time for the House Republicans to marshall their forces and give a good accounting of themselves.

  “Keeler is a yes,” announced Congressman Nelson as the rebel staffers frantically put together their own whip count.

  “Ok,’ said Rickover, “that gets us close.”

  The conference room was a mess, with paper and technology scattered across almost every surface. Someone had run out to Target and purchased half a dozen power bars that we strewn across the surface of the table and filled with chargers for every kind of electronic device known to man.

  “I put the count at twelve,” said Nelson, wiping his brow and leaning back while squinting at giant whiteboard that someone had managed to haul into the room.

  “Eleven,” said Rickover, “we managed to get Hansen onto an earlier flight.”

  “Forget the flights,” said Nelson, pointing out the window, “I’m increasingly concerned about how the fuck we’re going to get people into here.”

  The noise of the crowds assembled outside was deafening and the police were struggling to tamp down the confrontations that were occurring between the mob supporting the President on one side and the one supporting the Republicans on the other. No one had been killed or seriously wounded, yet, but several people had been taken to the hospital already and the police had arrested seventy-two people who had attempted to break through the police cordon and enter the Capitol itself while chanting, “Who’s House? Our House!” over and over again.

  “They let the pizzas through,” said Rickover, leaning over the table to grab a cooling slice.

  “Everyone still has that much working-class solidarity, at least,” said Nelson, “and a lot of those guys are pretty savvy. The last one through here told me that when the people accosting him were dirty and unshaven he told them he was delivering to the Democrats and when they were clean he said the Republicans.”

  “Smart,” said Rickover, “but what if he ran into some clean Democrats?”

  “He said it hadn’t come up.”

  Washington, DC

  Christopher Sorensen had remained glued to the coverage of events in Washington for nearly thirty-six consecutive hours. The Republicans in the Senate continued to stall events there, with Senators now speaking in a rotation to block a final vote on the Economic Reform Act while rumors swirled as to what exactly was going on in the House of Representatives.

  “The fact is,” said the lone Democratic panelist on Fox News that afternoon, “is that if the Congress had an up and down vote on this bill today it would be on the President’s desk tonight.”

  “Indeed,” the anchor sonorously intoned, “just this morning a number of America’s top CEOs are out with an op-ed piece in the New York Times calling upon the Congress to pass this bill in order to keep the economy from going over a cliff. So there’s some fairly broad support behind the bill.”

  “This is ridiculous,” interjected the editor of the Weekly Standard. “The President has created a crisis by making unilateral decisions that violate the Constitution and basic principles of the separation of powers and then, when those decisions turn around and have consequences – expected consequences, I should add – he demands that the Congress go along with him in the de facto nationalization of around a quarter of the American economy. No to that. A thousand times no.”

  “Just today,” said the lone Democrat, “we had a major electronic retailer – one that employs more than 100,000 people – say that they’re going to close their doors on Friday if this bill doesn’t pass, because they won’t be able to make payroll. Those are the consequences of inaction here.”

  “That’s like murdering your parents and pleading for mercy because you’re an orphan,” said the guy from the Weekly Standard.

  Sorensen heard the door open and he swiftly changed the channel to CNN: he didn’t need to have another argument.

  “It’s crazy out there,” said Sarah as she stepped through the door, “the police have streets closed even many blocks away from the Capitol.”

  Sorensen held his tongue.

  “...the crowds out on the streets keep growing by the hour,” said the CNN anchor, “the latest estimates from the DC police is that there are more than 150,000 people on the streets of the District tonight. Arrests as a result of altercations between elements of the crowd and attempts to breach security barriers now exceed one hundred.”

  “I know that you don’t like to hear this,” said Sarah as she took a seat next to
Sorensen on the couch, “but I really think that the Republicans are going to have to give in. The energy out there is electric.”

  Sorensen muttered something unintelligible and buried his head in his tablet as the television droned on.

  “I am told that fights between members of the crowd have been multiplying as the day has gone on and tempers have been rising,” said the reporter on the scene as the camera panned across the now-massive crowds that ringed the Capitol and spilled across every inch of space on the National Mall.

  “The police are trying to do their best to keep the groups separate from each other, but the problem now is that both groups are constantly attempting to outmaneuver one another to try and grab the interior position closest to the Capitol itself. It’s a very turbulent situation here.”

  The Oval Office, The White House

  “Mr. President,” said Jamal Anderson, “what I’m hearing from the Minority Leader and Speaker Halverson – who is now working out of some space that we provided him and what remains of his staff in the OEOB, is that they think that a vote in the House tonight would be a jump ball, at best. The Republican rebels are well-organized and have been bringing in more and more of their members. A lot of the people who ought to go to Halverson are considered doubtful right now. The Speaker thinks that we’d win a vote, but the Minority Leader is privately doubtful.”

  “And still no progress in the Senate?” asked the President.

  “No sir,” confirmed the Chief of Staff, “there are now twenty-one Republican members of the Senate who have joined in the filibuster there. The Minority Leader tells me that, while the Majority Leader is sympathetic, he doesn’t think that he will even dare to call it up for a vote. It might have majority support, in other words – but we’re losing out on the technical side of this. Badly, for the time being.”

  “But isn’t time on our side here?” said the President, “after all, the longer this goes on, the more the crowd surrounding the Capitol grows and the grimmer the overall economic news gets.”

  “That’s definitely true,” said the Chief of Staff, “at this point, the Secretary of the Treasury tells me, there’s basically no one buying bonds except for the Federal Reserve or entities that are, in essence, straw buyers on behalf of the Fed. We’re getting more and more reports of layoffs and closures by the hour.”

  “Then we just need to say the course,” said the President.

  Washington State Conference Centre, Seattle, WA

  Governor Mitchell Randall eyed the other luminaries in the room. In addition to himself, the Governors of twenty-six states, along with a hundred other state officials, had gathered in Seattle to discuss preparations for an Article V Convention to amend the Constitution. The Governors of sixteen other states had sent regrets. Six had refused to attend. The Governors of Rhode Island and Hawaii had not bothered to respond at all.

  “Well ladies and gentlemen,” said the Governor as he stood on the dais, “since I called you folks together, I suppose I ought to kick things off.”

  “Here’s what we do know: Washington – DC that is, not the great state that I have the privilege of being the Governor of – simply doesn’t work. We can see that today in the chaos that has descended upon the Capitol. That is a visible manifestation of the sickness that afflicts our country. But, I ask you, does anyone here – does a single solitary soul among those of you present – think that any of this began today or simply with this President or, depending on your point of view, with this Congress?”

  There was a general murmur of assent.

  “Alright then,” said Randall, “then let’s not let ourselves get bogged down in partisan bickering. I want to talk about how we fix this, not how we got ourselves here.

  “As the circumstances are urgent, I hope that I will offend no one here if I am very blunt: the primary problem that America faces today is that the Federal Government has become too large and too powerful. I know that this isn’t news to any of you. I know that this isn’t a new thought. The government exercises control over all aspects our lives, in ways both visible and invisible. This was always a destructive evil, but now it has become a fatal one.

  “Put simply, the state is the great seducer. We all know that it’s wrong – don’t you know it – to expect to appropriate the work of others and to put it to your benefit. We know that. Just like we know that it’s wrong for us to break our marriage vows and to go to bed with the seducer, we know that it’s wrong to use the state to extort value from others and keep it to ourselves. But, little by little, more and more of us were seduced. At all points on the spectrum – the poor by free benefits, the middle class with jobs and perks, and the rich with tax breaks, subsidies, and special deals. No class is immune. No one – including myself and all of you here today – is wholly innocent.”

  “The problem we are confronting today is a mathematical one.”

  Showily, the Governor walked up to a blackboard that had been set up on the stage and picked up a stick of chalk.

  “First, the various clients of the state now constitute a majority – ensuring that power will eternally remain in the hands of those in favor of the redistributionist state.

  “Second, in order to secure this majority, the redistributionists have made promises that have exhausted all of their resources: those real, those borrowed, and now even those hypothetical. They spent every dollar they had and then, when they couldn’t do that anymore, they borrowed and spent everything that anyone would give them. And, in the last resort, when that was no longer enough they just started making money up out of the air.

  “So, that’s the first element of this problem. X equals the resources required to fuel the demands of all of the client of the state. Y represents the maximum resources available to the state. When X is Greater than Y, there are just a few options: either reduce the value of X or increase the value of Y. Let’s call that gap Z.

  “For the statists, reducing X is out because the whole of their power depends upon it. They can’t spend less, because their coalition isn’t held together by any guiding principle, it’s held together by money and a mutual interest in looting the treasury. So they have to find a way to increase the value of Y by adding some Z factor.

  “They’ve spent all of their money. They can’t borrow any more. They’ve exhausted their ability to just make it up. Yet the math doesn’t lie – if they wish to maintain their power, they must find a way to add Z to Y. Where do they get it from?

  “Simply put: they have to steal it. And that’s just what they are trying to do in Washington today.

  “These issues that we face are fundamental. I know that there’s been this effort in the media to draw some sort of line between so-called “moderate” Republicans such as Terrance Rickover and myself and the rest of his allies in Washington. Let me set the record straight: we may disagree about many trifling issues, but there is no daylight between us on this fundamental question: this government must live within its means or this government will cease to exist.

  “Now, some of my friends in the press might label that last statement as being “radical” or “inflammatory”, but it is simply the truth. One way or another the end is coming for the welfare state and it will not be pretty. The math, as it stands, just does not work. In order to maintain its power, the welfare state will have to engage in the greatest and boldest act of theft in history. I use the word “theft” advisedly, for that is what the President’s proposals today are – theft cloaked by pseudo-legalistic nonsense.

  “I desire peace. I wish for nothing more deeply that the peaceful adjustment of all of our differences. But let us not transform a desire for peace and tranquility into a willingness to surrender unconditionally on points of principle. There are some lines that must not be crossed, there are some compromises that must never be made.”

  John A. Wilson Building, District of Columbia

  Rodney Tate, the Mayor of the District of Columbia, was furious.

  “Why are we letti
ng these white interlopers take over the streets of our city!” he shouted at his staff across the open-plan office that they shared.

  “Mr. Mayor,” his Press Secretary whispered, “please don’t say things like that where someone might hear.”

  “Nonsense!” roared the Mayor, “I’m not going to have these white motherfuckers come in here and tell us what to do.”

  “Mr. Mayor...” said the Mayor’s Chief of Staff gently. He had served with the Mayor during his many years on the DC City Council and during his time serving as a Department head during a previous Administration and he generally knew how to handle the man’s late-night rages. However, the intensification of the Mayor’s tendency towards drink had somewhat diminished the utility of that long experience.

  “Fuck no!” shouted the Mayor, “Fuck no!”

  “I think that this is a matter best left to the White House...” said the Chief of Staff.

  “That lily-white cracker in the White House might run the country, but this is my motherfucking city,” insisted the Mayor, stabbing his finger forward as he spoke.

  “Get me the Chief of Police,” insisted the Mayor.

  “I think that we need to take some time to consider the implications of this in full, even if we rule out how it will play with our friends in the Administration,” said the Chief of Staff.

  “No. N. O,” replied the Mayor.

  “Alright,” said the Chief of Staff after a long pause, “alright.”

  U.S. Senate

  Senator Meghan Russell of Kansas was holding the floor when the news came in.

  “Mr. President,” said the thirty-four-year-old blonde ex-Attorney General, “the actions of the actions of this Administration have violated all political norms that this country – and this Congress – have ever respected. I am astonished as those, like the Senator from Illinois, who would dare to lecture us on the political protocols of such a situation while they abet the greatest violations of the Constitution in the history of this nation...”