Merciful Vows: A Bittersweet Second Chance Romantic Suspense (The Giannotti World Book 1)

by Vanessa Luisa

  Come back home.

  I back away from his touch and grip the steel balcony. Our stars shine brightly against the dark, ominous Seattle sky. There is so much beauty in his gift. So much opulence and…hope.

  “Apart from the other night, you haven’t slept properly in this house since Addilyn went.”

  “And I don’t know if I will be able to tonight.”

  “I will be here for you, with you. Just think about the idea of a home, darling. You do not need to tell me now. I will give you all the time you need and deserve.”

  My chest expands.

  Of course I want to live with him again. But there’s something in our way…

  “This is all of me, Giulio. This is where I want to be. With you. With our entire family. The five of us,” I say, my voice breaking while wiping away tears. “What will it take to convince you Addilyn is alive? I will do anything at this point, baby.”

  “I don’t want to hurt you more. I know I might if we talk about Addilyn.”

  “No hurt. I will listen with no judgment tonight. I promise.”

  Giulio signs. “It will still hurt you.”

  “I can carry a heavy heart.”

  The rumble of the city so close drowns out the heavy fluttering of my anxious mind. Right now, there are so many things I feel for him that have taken months to come to light. It’s only in these past three weeks working for him where everything has begun falling into place.

  In slow, delicate steps he approaches me from behind. My heart is set on fire.

  Giulio doesn’t need to say a word.

  He knows me.

  The warmth he provides with his bare chest against my exposed back can save me from a rising tide. When he sweeps my hair off my right shoulder and hugs me from behind, I smile against his secure touch. This is exactly where I want him. How I need him. Why I love him.

  “But I want to carry the heavy heart for you, baby.”

  “Do you not believe Addilyn is alive because of your mother?”

  “Yes,” he whispers and rests his chin upon the edge of my right shoulder.

  “During this time I’ve learned that concealing the past leads you nowhere. We have to confront it with fresh eyes and…I want to understand you. Let me in.”

  “I try my best to be the man she would have wanted me to be, but I keep failing.”

  “I beg to differ. She would be so proud of you.”

  Giulio sucks in a breath. “My mother is the reason I don’t believe Addilyn is alive. I have the perfect fantasy that they’re together. That they’re happy and have each other. Without the fantasy, I lose myself and don’t know who I am anymore. Without it, my mother is alone up there. I can’t have the agony of waiting it out. I need a solution to this madness and acceptance is what I resorted to these past few months.”

  It makes sense for him. That’s the architect in Giulio; needing everything with precise solutions and followed through with accuracy. I understand it perfectly now.

  “My solution is courage to keep believing. I need to find her, even if I’m the only one.”

  Usually, this would spark a circular debate, but tonight everything is different. “I’ve tried, baby. I’ve tried so hard to believe it too. Of course I want to believe it, but in these last months, I’ve been incapable of doing so and it ruins me. It ruins me because I know how greatly you want her and I want her too. But there’s this…toxin inside me that doesn’t let me grasp it.”

  “Let me be your cure.”

  “Convince me to change. Maybe if you convince me then…” Giulio’s desperate lips brush against my neck, electrifying every sensual kiss. I ease back, rolling my head to the side to deepen his access. His stubble grazes my skin through every peck. “Convince me, amore.”

  “There will be no battlefield. We can exist in a way that isn’t just memories. We don’t have to…hold each other accountable. We don’t have to have this divide. I understand your fear and your reasoning. Let’s say Addilyn is with your mother now and she’s guiding her, but what if you hold onto hope for Addilyn and she can be returned to us with your mother’s safe touch? I love your mother, Giulio. I never met her, but I know I love her because she made you into the man you are. You carried her wisdom and warmth. Her courage and strength. You took her greatest hidden agony and you protected her. You stood by her even when she wasn’t able to do so herself. That doesn’t only take a man, it takes a good man, and that is what you are. She would want us to be happily thriving in life and for us to never lose faith in her granddaughter. She would want Addilyn to be back in our arms…if we’re united, we can make that happen.”

  “You don’t know how much that means to me.” I’m relieved that through his pained voice, he holds onto me closer “I don’t want to spend another second losing you, Lencia. You and our kids are the best things that have happened to me. Without you, I would have nothing.”

  “We need each other. I don’t want to spend my life without you, Giulio.”

  “And I need you in mine. As my wife, as my one and only. You can rely on me, amore.”

  Inches apart, I turn to face him. “You can rely on me too.”

  “I don’t want to be scared anymore. I believe it, Lencia. I want our daughter more than ever. Let’s find her, because now I realize it’s not false hope; it’s the only way. I believe it now.” Giulio’s eyes allow our greatest vulnerability to be exposed as he cups my face ever so fondly. “I love you. I love you so much, Valencia Giannotti. I always have. I always will.”

  My entire world comes alive. “I love you.”

  Giulio crushes his lips on mine and hoists me to his waist in the same second. He blindly navigates the stairs down until we stumble into the bedroom, where he kicks off his shoes and I lower to strip his clothes in our fiery passion.

  It can’t be more perfect than this—Giulio trusting hope.

  He devours every inch of my body with tender kisses to prove just how much he means it. Emotion blooms inside my chest when I fall back against the soft gray sheets and he shows love to my cesarean scar. The warm saturated glow cast down from the ceiling illuminates every scar of our past. I love us more for it. He believes in Addilyn. He believes in me. I believe in me.

  Yes!

  I love the way he knows my body and I know his. How he whispers sweet nothings in my ear as he molds my breasts, twirling his tongue over my nipples before sucking to build the sensual elation of what’s to come.

  Hope of a better tomorrow.

  “I have an idea…”

  Giulio arches a suggestive brow. “Really now?”

  “Yes, turn us around.”

  When he does, I sit up to straddle his waist and grin at his enthusiastic sexy smolder. Giulio props himself on his forearms, those heavenly biceps and abdominal muscles tense at the motion. “So, what’s going on in that sexy mind of yours?”

  “You’ll know soon enough,” I giggle, pecking his lips before saying. “I’ll be right back!”

  I’m out of the bedroom and return from the kitchen with a jar of wildflower honey. I rattle it upon entry and Giulio grins widely. “Come here, baby. Remind me how wild we get.”

  A passionate fiery kiss follows until I straddle his waist and playfully shove back his shoulder. “Hands above your head, Giannotti.”

  Giulio lies down on the king sized bed as I unscrew the lid. I dip a finger into the golden honey and pop it into my mouth. The taste is light and fruity, yet richly flavored at the same time as I whirl my tongue around.

  The way Giulio is looking at me…Damn, I’m in paradise.

  With his hard cock pressed against my core, I tease him a little longer. I generously dip in two fingers and trail the lustrous honey from his base to a paved path around the bruises and then his lips. There’s something about the way he rebels against my hands-off command by sexily holding back my hair and those curse filled moans that have me suck, lick, and swirl away the sticky spread off his body faster.

  Erotically, red lip
stick along his body replaces the honey. The moment I reach his mouth, Giulio swiftly spins us around so he’s on top and pins me to the bed. Instead of devouring his honey lips, he has me share the experience through our long passionate kiss, that familiar electric charge between us intensifying.

  “Dio mio,” he murmurs with a smile, setting the jar of honey on the bedside table. “The things I’m going to do after that sexy stunt you just pulled, Mrs. Giannotti.”

  My entire body is throbbing for him as he rubs the tip of his cock at my wet pussy, so damn hard and ready for me. His sexy smolder has me grinning. “You make me so happy, Giulio.”

  “So do you, my angel.”

  “I’m still on birt—”

  Giulio doesn’t wait to hear as he thrusts inside me. I moan out his name, the word velvet against my lips. A mystified scent of vanilla and rich oak surrounds us. There’s a fire circulating my heart that reaches across every single nerve ending.

  I cannot stop grinning against every motion.

  Neither can he.

  I adore his smile lines and the way it charges the atmosphere around us further. He takes my left hand and brushes it across his chest. I know it’s bound to hurt with the bruises. “Your touch repairs me.”

  The thrusts deepen.

  The pleasure builds.

  It’s so intimate and loving. Oh my good God.

  “Fuck.” He curses against my mouth. My legs wrap around his waist where I lock my ankles as his hands hug my waist. I’m in awe of the way he lifts us up to his knees and pins my back against the fabric upholstered headboard while thrusting.

  “Yes, baby.” My nails run across his muscular biceps until my hands wrap around his neck for support. This long-awaited moment has been worth it. Our bodies connect so perfectly. It feels as though mine is floating in the air with his enduring hold. I want this sensual moment to last forever.

  Every second looking into his bluish-gray eyes and witnessing desire deepen makes me surge faster in rhythm with his hips. We’re smiling amid jagged breaths, our romantically tender gazes on one another urges our motions even more intense.

  “Oh, baby…we’re so lucky this headboard is wall mounted.”

  The reality of his words makes me laugh. “You did it on purpose!”

  Giulio winks with a sexy smirk. “Shhh, our secret.”

  Our pure bliss has me shutting my eyes in pleasure of the fire burning all over my body. The size of the void Giulio fills is so vast. A sticky sweetness hits my bouncing breasts and my gaze opens to honey dripping from Giulio’s pointer and middle finger. Still rocking into me, I’m further turned on as he teasingly rubs it all over my breasts and watches me suck his fingers clean before he lowers his head to lick away the glittering golden honey against my skin ever so slowly.

  My racing heart explodes. “Don’t stop, baby. Don’t stop.”

  “Never, amore.”

  My continuous moans have him flicking his tongue over my pebbled nipples, He intensifies our hot sex by biting down hard on them with a sexy, dominant growl and just the right amount of pressure to pull me under.

  I love this man. I love him so damn much.

  “You’re my air, Lencia.”

  “And you’re mine.”

  “You’re so fucking beautiful. It feels like a dream having you here.”

  That velvety voice…

  “A dream I never want to wake up from.”

  “We don’t have to,” he breathes. “Not anymore.”

  “There’s nothing more I want than this life with you.”

  My nails sink into his skin and it only takes a few more thrusts for me to come undone at his touch. His kiss swallows my moans as I clench around him and lose myself in the new world we have created for ourselves.

  It’s him.

  It’s always been him.

  Giulio Giannotti is my healing. My everything.

  Wherever this night takes us, I know I will remember it forever. Because this will not only be a memory, from this point forward this will be our life.

  Moments later his face falls into the crook of my neck and he kisses the base, all while moaning along to every slower thrust as his warmth spills inside me. Moments pass before Giulio lies us back down and hovers over me. All it takes is giving Giulio the specific look and grin for him to sling my legs over his shoulder and pound into me hard and fast again.

  We turn the previous urge to make love into fucking mercilessly for all the days we’ve been without each other. We don’t stop at twice. We keep on going into the night until we’re beaded in sweat with all positions exhausted and our panting melting into one. Here on this bed, we drive each other to the most intense orgasms of our lives.

  I smile at him in pure happiness, easing down as dusk turns to dawn around us.

  Now. That. Was. Hot.

  Giulio chuckles at our giddiness and kisses my forehead. Still wrapped in each other, we catch our breath. “This is the first dawn of our new lives together.”

  “And I couldn’t think of any other way to spend it.”

  “I love you so much, Lencia.”

  “Love you more.”

  “Impossible.”

  Giulio

  Holy hell.

  Just when I thought I couldn’t fall any deeper in love with Valencia Giannotti I’m proven wrong. My heart hasn’t stopped exploding with joy since the moment she told me she loves me too. It’s one of the best feelings in the world—to keep another’s heart safe.

  We made love into the early hours of the morning and now as I lie here beside her, I cannot be happier with my decision to trust life and hope for Addilyn. Trust life, just like my mom used to tell me.

  These past days have brought everything into perspective for me. My mother will be okay. She will always be my guardian angel. Her death is irreversible but with Addilyn there is hope.

  I know this now.

  Valencia’s right. She’s been right about it all along. I’ve been so blinded within these last few months, attempting to protect myself from being vulnerable, when all along I should have believed. I could have been with my wife all this time instead of backing away. But I have her now and will never take advantage of our second chance. Never.

  I’ve been staring at the dresser across from us for the past few minutes. Inside the third draw, pushed to the right corner is a teal box. It’s where our wedding bands rest. I feel so complete knowing that it’ll only be a matter of time before we’re back to normal.

  Before she’s officially mine again.

  A lump forms in my throat at what else is hidden at the back of the drawer…what Sandro gave me. Valencia has no idea, and until I need it…I’ll keep it that way. She will understand.

  Silvery shapes of the moonlight slither across Lencia’s face, enough to make out she’s peacefully asleep. I snuggle her closer and my eyes trail to the night sky through the French doors. Our stars are further east from where the frame cuts off, but my heart warms just the same.

  Our love will never fade.

  “Thank you for making me believe,” I whisper. “Thank you for everything, Lencia.”

  Sobs wake me and I immediately thank God for being a light sleeper. Pulling Valencia to me, I rub small circles on her bare back. Her pain is my pain. My heart is racing, pondering the first and worst thought in my mind.

  Is she crying because of Addilyn or… is she crying because she regrets what we did?

  Her breasts press against my chest, sending me a heavy reminder of earlier. I can’t see the alarm clock from where I am, but the red-covered dawn skies confirm it’s sometime past five o’clock.

  “I’m sorry. I dreamt that Addilyn got returned to us and it…affected me.”

  She doesn’t regret it.

  Thank God.

  “It’s okay, darling. It will happen in real life soon, I’m sure of it.” I kiss her forehead, the reassurance I give her cures a part of me too. Yes. In real life. In this life. “It’ll all be okay.”

 
Valencia is quiet for a moment before she says, “I want to go in the nursery.”

  She hasn’t been since the beginning of the case as it evoked too many memories for her every time she attempted to step inside. I get it, but in these past few months without both my girls, that nursery has brought me a sense of comfort.

  “You do?”

  “I need to force myself. Have you been in?”

  “Almost every night. I fall asleep in the rocking chair, only to wake up to a stiff neck and a heavy heart.”

  She reaches forward to cup my tense jaw and when she does, there’s a soft smile among the tears. “Will you come with me?”

  My heart is beating out of my chest. I analyze the havoc within her eyes and just how nervous she seems. I don’t want her flushed or anxious. “Of course I will, amore.”

  I slip on my boxers and we retreat to the nursery door.

  Lencia’s skin glows at the peeks of the morning light down the hall. I take her hand, ignoring the way her sculpted nakedness has me yearning to claim yet another one of her orgasms. Soon. Now is not the time.

  Lencia’s fingers brush against the nursery door, but she steps back. There’s a resistance within her that wasn’t there before. Her boldness has worn off. There’s no way in hell she is backing out of this now. Not with me present. I told myself I was going to help her overcome the doubts that cluster her mind, and now is a perfect time to be proactive. She needs to do this for herself and I’m going to be right here to weather her storm.

  “We’ll come out if it’s too much.”

  She shakes her head. Trembling overtakes her body as she hugs her waist and steps back further. “No, I can’t do it. I thought I could, but now that I’m here I can’t.”

  “Yes, you can.”

  “No, no I can’t see inside.”

  “Baby, relax.” I take her waist and kiss her softly. Her entire body relaxes in my hold and it’s exactly what she needs. “We’ve suffered through so much, and from experience, I know at times it’s easy to think you’re battling alone in a war. It’s not true. That only means you haven’t looked beside you, because while you’re distracted by the lurking evil, support has been marching in to tame the bad. Let me be that support. I’m going to be right beside you. We’ll keep the lights off, okay? I’m right with you. You can do this.”