We start our dinner and except for the huge mess we left in the den, it’s as if nothing happened.
WE’RE CLEANING UP dinner and Sally corners me in the kitchen. “I’m glad to see you happy, kid,” she says with a twinkle in her eye.
“What do you mean?” I’m playing it off like I’m not seriously into the blonde sitting in the den.
“You know what I mean, and I’m happy for you. I didn’t think you’d ever soften up. I didn’t think you’d ever find anyone good enough, but you have.”
What is she talking about? Good enough? “Sally, it’s the other way around. She’s too good for me, and we’re not together or anything. I’m pretty sure she just tolerates me. I have kidnapped her, after all.” I say the last part with a smirk in an effort to lighten up this conversation. Sally puts her hand on my shoulder and looks me in the face.
“I think she’s the one who will show you your good side. You have so much potential. You only need someone to steer you in the right direction. I think she can do that for you…if you allow her.”
I don’t say anything, only keep wiping down the dishes. What does Sally know about my good side? I thought everyone saw me as tough as nails, twisted and evil. Now Sally thinks I have “potential?”
I glace over at Claire. She’s sitting on the couch, making conversation with Marcus. They’re laughing at something. I long for her to be mine. Sally elbows me in the arm and winks again.
“What?” I ask her with another smirk. She’s caught me staring at Claire and I’m slightly embarrassed.
“Glad to see you happy. If anyone deserves it, it’s you.”
SHE’S BACK, AND I don’t know how to handle her. Maggie walks into the apartment like she owns the place. Marcus, Tommy, Simon and I are sitting around the kitchen table, playing cards when she breezes in. Claire sits on the sofa, switching between reading her book and watching television, while Maggie gives her a death stare.
“Whose chick is that?” she asks, nodding her head towards Claire. She takes her long nails and runs them through her hair. The outfit she’s wearing is a tight black dress. Normally, I would be all over that, but tonight, things are different.
No one answers her question at first because Claire really doesn’t belong to anyone. I know Claire can hear our conversation. She’s sitting right there. She’s pretending to be all about the sitcom on television, but I know she hears every word.
“She’s nobody’s chick, Maggie,” I answer as I throw in one of my cards. I don’t even look at her because I don’t want to see those eyes. I can never say no, and I’ve never not wanted her more than I do right now. Maggie walks over to me, her heels clicking against the kitchen floor until I feel her warm body standing next to me. I exhale a deep breath and then finally glance at her to see what she wants.
“What?” My question is cold, and I really don’t care if I hurt her feelings. I know nothing will ever happen between Claire and I, but I’m not giving into Maggie tonight. It’s not happening.
“You know what I want. Quit acting like a jackass and just give it to me.”
“Not tonight, Maggie.” My voice is low, and I throw in a few more cards as if she’s not standing right there. She takes her manicured nails and runs them down my neck.
“You’ve never told me no before…what’s the problem?” She whispers the words into my ear and I feel the warm draw start to build between us. She runs her fingers down my neck and onto my shoulders. She sits in my lap, her tits right in my line of sight, and I start to wonder why I’m holding out anyway. It’s not like Claire will ever touch me like this. She’s clearly out of my league.
I feel every eye in the room on me as Maggie leans in for kiss. Just before her lips hit mine, I come to my senses and put both hands on her shoulders. I drop my cards as I push her away.
“I said not tonight, Maggie. Go find someone else to screw.”
She’s taken aback by my comment, probably because I have never told her no before. She doesn’t speak for a moment. I can’t look at her face. I feel Claire’s blue eyes staring at me. I see her in my peripheral vision and she’s documenting every action I make. “I said no,” I repeat, feeling stupid in front of everyone. Who says no to easy sex?
But they don’t know how bad I hate myself when the deed is finished. I’ve never even had sex with Claire, and I still feel so good after I spend time with her. This thing with Maggie has to stop, and I’m ending it tonight.
“Maggie, I’m done. For good. Go find someone else.” I push her completely off my lap and run my hand down my face. This feels good; I’m actually proud of myself. Maggie storms out, slamming the door so hard that one of Sally’s pictures falls off the wall.
Marcus leans over and holds his hand out to give me a high five. I give him a slight smile because I won a small victory tonight. Marcus knows how much I loathed this circle of debauchery Maggie and I had going on, even though I’d never once mentioned it to him. By the faces of the other guys, I’m pretty sure the entire room knows about my triumph.
Well, everyone except a small, blonde angel, which is ironic because she’s the one who gave me the strength to say no.
THE WEEK PASSES quickly. I never want it to end. Claire and I travel daily to the pond where we’ve made ourselves our own little spot. Here I am real. Here I have no walls and no one to impress. With Claire, I’m not required to impress. With Claire, I have rediscovered my true self, and this knowledge lifts additional weight from my chest.
With no work at night, we often find ourselves in bed watching a movie by nine. After the movie, we sit and talk for hours, and I find myself hoping to escape sleep. I often wake, a smile on my face, discovering my hand intertwined with hers. I long for the nights and for our days at the pond where I can be myself and where my anger and temper subside into the background. Maybe Claire has turned me into a pansy, but the crazy part is that, I don’t mind. I would do anything for this girl.
I feel us growing closer, and I hate myself for allowing this connection, but I love the feeling too much to stop. The last night before work is set to resume, we lie in bed, talking as I watch the moonlight send slivers of light down her body. I eye her legs, her hands, her fingers. I have to tear my eyes away, knowing I’m slowly losing self-control. Once I allow myself to go there, I will lose all control. The feeling is both scary and calming.
“Have you ever had a girlfriend?” Her question comes from left field, and I wonder if she’s been thinking the same thoughts I have. I give a nervous laugh and run my hand down my face. This isn’t the conversation you want to have with the girl you’re trying to impress, even when you know you can’t have her.
“Not really,” I start, and when she doesn’t say anything else, I feel the need to elaborate. “I was in too much trouble in high school and once I was out of school, I started this business with Marcus. I really haven’t had much time to date, much less get involved with anybody serious.” I hope this answers her question. I really don’t do anything with commitment.
“But you’ve been with women?” She’s nervous about asking me this question, and I give a small laugh.
“Yes, Claire. Just nothing serious and nothing meaningful.” I mean this. All I’ve had are one-night stands and a few friends with benefits; mostly girls from the streets, girls used to this type of lifestyle. In high school, it was girls who were rough around the edges like me. I have never been this close to a girl like Claire. Never.
“Who was that girl who came in here the other night? The one in the tight black dress and the long black hair?”
“Um…that was Maggie.” I really don’t want to have this discussion about Maggie with Claire.
“And she’s…what to you?”
Why is Claire even asking? Do I detect jealously in her voice? Surely not. Why would she be jealous?
“She’s just an easy lay.” I stare at the ceiling because I’m not sure if that’s the answer she wants, but it’s the only answer I have. “And every time it
’s over, I feel guilty as hell. So I ended it.”
“So…you and she are over?”
I laugh at her question. “We were never anything, but yes, what shallow, meaningless thing we had is officially over. I finally found the strength to tell her no. And you? How many boyfriends have you had?” I need to turn this discussion back on her because I don’t want her asking me where I found the strength. I would never confess to her that she is the reason. I might have become a pansy, but I’m not admitting this to her.
“I have a boyfriend now. I had a serious boyfriend in high school, but that’s obviously over. So, to answer your question, I’ve had two.”
WHAT? She’s never mentioned a boyfriend. I’m suddenly jealous. I know I have no reason to be, but I seriously want to go and pound this guy’s head in.
“Who?”
“His name is Jonathan. I met him in law school.”
I have two thoughts running through my head. One is to find Jonathan and beat his ass, and the other is to wonder what chance I would ever have had with a girl like Claire, anyway. Even if we could be together, I’m up against a guy who will one day be a lawyer. If she was given the opportunity to pick, I don’t think the choice would be too difficult. I mean, a lawyer verses Atlanta’s most wanted criminal. That’s almost not even a choice at all. If she picked me there would be something seriously wrong with her.
“I didn’t know. You haven’t mentioned him.”
“You didn’t ask.”
True. I didn’t ask because what we have is temporary, anyway.
“How long have you two been together?” Why am I torturing myself by asking her these questions?
“Over a year.”
We don’t speak for a while after this because I don’t want to know any additional information about Jonathan. I already hate the guy. I hate him because he’s touched her and I haven’t, and I hate him because he’s good enough for her and I’m not.
“Brandon, can I tell you something?”
I pause for a moment because if this is about Jonathan, I really don’t want to hear any more. “Sure.”
“You promise not to be mad at me?”
Why would I be mad at her? Is she about to tell me about Jonathan and her amazing sex life? Okay, I might be mad if that is what she mentions. “Sure.”
She gives a long pause, and I allow myself to glance again at the moonlight on her figure. She takes a deep breath. Suddenly, I’m nervous. What if she really is about to tell me about Jonathan? What if he’s hurt her? What if he’s a bad guy after all? I’ll go and take care of him for her. Maybe she wants to get away from him.
“I know how you can get those sealed files.”
Did I hear her correctly? Did she just do a 180? I thought we were talking about Jonathan and our dating history. “What?” I sit up in bed and look at her in the moonlight. “What did you say?” I feel a sudden urge ripping through me like never before. It’s not anger. It’s…hope. Something I completely and utterly lost so many years ago.
“The files. I know how I can get my hands on them.”
“How?” I have gripped her entire body and pulled her in front of me. She places her hands on my forearms and looks me seriously in the face.
“It’s all on my computer. I have the passwords stored there, and I can take a backdoor website posing as my dad. I’ve done it before, with his permission of course, and I can find where they are.”
I think I have quit breathing. I am allowing hope to seep its way back into my soul. If I lose this time, it really might destroy me. “Please tell me this isn’t a joke, Claire, because if it is, you will kill me.” I take one hand off her body and run it down my face.
“This isn’t a joke. I can do this. Yes, it’s illegal, and I will forever lose my chance at a law degree if I get caught, but yes, I can find this for you. Fairly easily, in fact.”
I look up into her eyes and I see truth and honesty there, two traits that are hard to find in this business. “You would sacrifice yourself to find my brothers…for me?” I almost whisper the words because surely this is a dream.
“Well, the sacrifice exists only if I get caught…and I don’t plan on getting caught.” She gives me a small smile in the moonlight.
“I’ll make sure you’re not caught, and if you are, I’ll take the full blame.” The atmosphere has become very serious. The desire to see my brothers is building and building by the second.
“They’ll know it’s me if we’re discovered,” she says as she takes a deep breath. “There won’t be any passing the blame.”
I think for a second and then devise a plan. “I’ll tell them I held a gun to your head and made you find these files. You can blame it all on me. I would never let you lose the ability to obtain your law degree.”
She stares at me in complete silence for seconds and then minutes. Finally, she nods in agreement. “Okay. Thank you.”
“Why did you think I would be mad at you?”
She pauses before responding, looking down at the sheets. “Because I’ve known this information from the moment you first mentioned the sealed files, but I didn’t say anything.” She looks guilty when she glances back to my eyes.
“You were scared of losing your right to practice; you were scared of getting kicked out of school,” I say. It’s not a question, but a statement.
“Yeah. I guess I was being selfish.”
I laugh, a huge laugh that echoes across the room. “Claire you are the last person, of all the people in this situation, who could possibly be selfish!”
I see a small smile slowly spread across her face and I grab her into a huge embrace. I pull her away from me and she’s shocked and all smiles.
“Where do we start? Where do we begin?” I’m so excited, like a schoolboy at Christmas.
“Well, we have to get my laptop,” she says and she’s suddenly serious again. “That where all the passwords are stored. I don’t have any of the passwords memorized.”
“That’s no problem. I’m sure we can break into anywhere to find your laptop. Where is it?”
She looks at the sheets again, and runs her fingers along the seam.
“It’s not that easy. Last I saw, it was at my father’s office.”
WE HAVE TO get our hands on that computer. The thought has taken over my mind. The feeling is so occupying I’ve almost forgotten about Claire.
The week off is over, and we are back running cars during the night. Claire still sits downstairs on the coach, reading her usual John Grisham books while I work. I like her down here. She’s calming, and I can keep an eye on her. She’s also devising a plan. Marcus and Tommy are in. Carlos is out.
“Get your mind back in the game!” Carlos shouts, and I give him an evil look.
“Stay off my back, Juan,” I say. He absolutely detests being called by his first name, and I do this to piss him off.
“What do you need so badly from that computer anyway?”
“None of your business. You said you wouldn’t help us, so now it’s really none of your business.” Marcus knows the entire truth, and Tommy thinks we want the computer for business reasons. Carlos knows nothing.
Marcus joins into the conversation. “When do you want to do this?”
I think for a minute. “We need someone to start watching the office to see when the last person leaves. We need to know where all the security cameras are located. Claire can probably help us with that one. We probably need to pick Saturday or Sunday night to go in.”
“It’s going to have to be me and Tommy that do the job. It’s too dangerous for you to go out in public,” Marcus states, and Carlos rolls his eyes.
“This is such a bad idea. I can’t believe her computer is that important. He probably doesn’t even need it for work. She probably just wants it, and lover boy here is so whipped, he’ll risk his life to go get it.” Carlos storms off. I watch him go, clenching my fists.
“Ignore him. I’ll start watching the building. Tommy and I will work
this one.”
“Claire and I will ride with you in the car the night of the job. It’s the least we can do. She can tell you the general vicinity of the building where the computer should be located.”
He nods and picks up a tool. “Let’s do this thing next weekend. I don’t like sitting around on plans too long.”
“Yeah, I know. Thanks Marcus. This means…a lot.”
He nods and walks away. He was never one for words or emotions. As I watch him go, that feeling of hope starts to swell again inside of me. It pours itself throughout my body, and a genuine smile crosses my face. Between the four of us, we can find a way to get Claire’s computer. Of this, I’m confident.
IT’S SATURDAY MORNING and dawn beams through the windows. I am paying out my employees and reminding them there’s no work again until Monday night. I hear groans, but I ignore the men. I have other thoughts occupying my mind. I’ve got an extensive break-in planned in less than twenty-four hours.
I glance at Claire. She’s passed out on the sofa, The Pelican Brief open on her lap. Claire is averaging one book every two days. I guess she does have time on her hands to read. She has been here an entire month now.
I feel guilty that she’s still here. I’ve probably shot her chances of graduating with her law class by removing her from her summer internship, and I know she must really miss her family. And Jonathan. I take in a deep breath at the thought of that man. She hasn’t mentioned him since our conversation, and I don’t bring him up. I can’t bear to think of another man touching her.
I don’t know how much longer this entire kidnapping plan is going to last. What do I do? Hold her hostage for the next year? Maybe Carlos, in a round-about way, is correct.
The Thief Redeemer Page 10
