Terror at the Sweet Shop

by Lawrence Prestidge

  “Staying up late every night and watching the stars.” Emma smiled.

  “We’ll get to play football at the park all the time,” said Oscar hopefully.

  “I can’t wait!” said Ishy. “When we’re adults we are so doing it right.”

  “But Miss Primrose is the worst kind of grown up,” Emma groaned. “How do we stop her?”

  “I’ve got a plan – but you guys should probably know if we get caught we could get in some real trouble. Or even worse…get grounded!” Oscar warned.

  “It’s a risk we’re going to have to take,” Reece said heroically.

  “Yeah. I mean, what if Spider Man never stood up to the Green Goblin?” Ishy agreed.

  “What if Wayne Rooney didn’t take that penalty for England?” Oscar added.

  “What if Harry Potter said, ‘you know what? I don’t really fancy Hogwarts’,” said Reece.

  “What if Snow White was never kissed by Prince Charming?” Emma said with a smile.

  “Errrr…Sure, imagine that.” Ishy raised an eyebrow.

  “Guys, tomorrow we are going to create our own story by saving our sweet shop and finding out where Mr McNulty is. We’ll save him. Every kid everywhere will remember our bravery. We will go down in history as official…legends. Who’s with me?” Oscar reached out his hand.

  “Count me in,” Ishy instantly put his hand on top of Oscar’s.

  “Me too,” added Reece as he reached his hand out.

  “I suppose you guys will need a girl’s brain to help you out.” Emma sighed as she put her hand on the top of the pile.

  “Sometimes us kids have to create a bit of trouble,” Oscar said with a wink.

  4

  THE NEXT DAY THE GANG HAD come up with a plan and how they would put it into action.

  “Stink her out?” Ishy asked, puzzled.

  “That’s right. If we could make it smell so bad in the sweet shop she had to leave – that’ll give us time to get rid of her for a while and find Mr McNulty!” Oscar explained.

  “So how are we going to ‘stink her out’ exactly?” questioned Emma.

  Oscar looked at Reece and nodded as Reece began to unzip his bag.

  “TA-DA! The REEKFEST 4000,” Reece presented proudly. “Me and Oscar put some of our pocket money together and got it last night!”

  “It’s actually real…” Ishy said in amazement.

  “What do you mean by the REEKFEST 4000?” Emma asked.

  “Emma, all joking aside, this is the stickiest, smelliest, most disgusting stink bomb in the world,” explained Oscar.

  “Most countries have banned it,” added Reece.

  “It’s beautiful!” Ishy said with a tear in his eye.

  “That’s how you expect us to get rid of Miss Primrose! A stupid stink bomb!” Emma groaned.

  The boys all gasped

  “Don’t call it stupid, Emma…it might hear you,” Ishy warned in a whisper.

  “Hear me?”

  “Never underestimate the power of the REEKFEST 4000,” intoned Reece.

  “Oh really? Why’s that?”

  “I heard at one school; they used it on a supply teacher and the smell was so revolting the teacher had to cut off his nose to get rid of the rancid smell” said Oscar.

  “I heard some kids threw one into the school’s staff room and that when the smell finally cleared all the teachers had disappeared, and were never seen again,” Reece added.

  “That’s nothing!” shouted Ishy as he braced himself to tell a more tragic story. “I heard one time this kid was going to let one off as a joke in a big store over the Christmas period, but something terrible happened. He was in the lift with his friends heading to the ladies’ gift floor, laughing about the terror he was about to unleash when: he dropped it.”

  Oscar and Reece gasped but Emma raised her eyebrow in suspicion as Ishy went on, “They tried their best to catch it, but it was too late. The REEKFEST 4000 exploded. They never did find the kid and his friends, all that was left was a pool of foul smelling slime on the bottom of the lift. Those kids were literally melted by the smell.”

  “What a way to go,” Reece sighed.

  “Dare I ask where all three of you heard these stories?” Emma questioned and all three boys answered in unison, “The Internet”.

  “I say no more,” said Emma as she rolled her eyes.

  The three boys could tell Emma was not impressed with these stories. They looked at each other, unsure what else to say before Reece repeated, “Never underestimate the power of the REEKFEST 4000”.

  “Besides, I’ve got a plan on top of a plan,” Oscar bragged.

  “And that is?” Emma asked.

  “Mikey of course.”

  “Go on…” Emma said more keenly.

  “Well we all know Mikey will want to get his revenge on Miss Primrose, right?” said Oscar.

  “Right,” muttered Reece.

  “And who do we know that does the most vile, disgusting farts in class?” asked Oscar.

  “Mikey! Of course!” cried Ishy.

  “Exactly – so with the REEKFEST 4000 and Mikey dropping power farts at the same time, there is no way Miss Primrose will be able to be in that shop for days!” explained Oscar.

  Emma was more accepting of this idea. She had seen…well…smelt a Mikey fart first hand and it certainly was traumatic.

  “Imagine what a stink bomb and a Mikey fart could do!” Reece said with excitement.

  “I’ve just had an apostrophe!” Ishy yelled.

  “I think you mean an epiphany,” Emma corrected.

  “My dad makes the strongest, spiciest curry at our restaurant. Imagine if we got Mikey to eat that before he farted, as well as using the REEKFEST 4000!!” Ishy suggested.

  “Ishy, that’s genius!” Oscar said.

  “Well… y’know…” Ishy shrugged with a grin.

  The next step would be to get Mikey on board and begin to bring Miss Primrose’s reign of terror to an abrupt end.

  5

  “YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT?” cried Mikey when the group had approached him at school.

  “Fart,” Ishy said, bluntly.

  “We’re going to stink her out,” Oscar added.

  “I don’t know, guys. It’s a lot of pressure. Especially on my bum. I’m not sure my farts are so bad they’d make her leave anyway,” Mikey said hesitantly.

  “I’m not so sure about that Mikey,” Emma said with a disgusted look.

  “Besides, we got you some back-up.” Reece pulled the REEKFEST 4000 out of his bag.

  “Is that what I think it is?” Mikey gasped.

  “That’s right. The REEKFEST 4000,” Oscar said proudly.

  Mikey’s mouth was open wide in pure amazement. A swarm of flies could have ventured into it, like an insect caving expedition.

  “Can I…touch it?” Mikey asked in a whisper as he reached his hand out.

  “No,” whispered back Reece as he moved the stink bomb out of Mikey’s reach.

  “So what do you say, Mikey? Are you in?” Oscar asked.

  Mikey was very hesitant. He didn’t particularly want to take on Miss Primrose but he, like all the kids at school, loved that sweet shop. The thought of losing it was unbearable.

  “You will go down in history as a hero,” Ishy tried to egg Mikey on.

  “A legend,” added Emma.

  A small smirk suddenly appeared on Mikey’s face.

  “See, I like the sound of that.” Mikey grinned.

  “You’ll be showered with sweets from thankful kids everywhere you go,” said Oscar.

  “Are you sure this is going to work?” questioned Mikey.

  “Hellloooooooo. REEKFEST 4000!” Reece reminded.

  In Mikey’s head the thought of being a legend was too good to resist. He pictured all the kids in the playground lifting him high in the air as they chanted: “Mikey, Mikey, Mikey!” and “We love you, Mikey!” and “Mikey, you are so incredibly handsome and definitely not fat!”


  “Okay. I’m in,” Mikey agreed.

  6

  WHEN ISHY WENT HOME THAT DAY, he had to persuade his dad to make his legendary curry. It wouldn’t be hard to convince him. His dad was very proud of his signature dish.

  Ishy’s parents owned a restaurant called ‘Curry Fusion’. It was the most popular restaurant in town; a family-owned business which kept his parents and older sisters working around the clock because it was always so busy.

  The dish Ishy wanted was entitled the ‘Chicken Tindaloo’ and the ingredients were as follows:

  CHICKEN

  FRESH CHILLIES

  LAMB

  DRIED HOT CHILLIES

  GARLIC

  DRIED RED HOT CHILLI PEPPERS

  ONION

  DRIED MEGA HOT CHILLI PEPPERS

  COCONUT

  WHITE VINEGAR

  MUSTARD POWDER

  AND ONE GHOST CHILLI

  Ishy had tried a mouthful once and that was enough to give him an upset tummy for a week! It certainly took its toll on anyone who ate it.

  Mr Kahn was delighted to prepare one of his dishes for Ishy. He didn’t even ask his son why he needed to take it to school, so Ishy didn’t need to use the food tech excuse he’d prepared.

  Ishy was mesmerised whenever he watched his dad cooking, he was like a magician with food; everything was always timed to perfection. Although this curry was only for the bravest of eaters. Ishy couldn’t help admiring the way his dad cooked, he couldn’t get over his dad’s concentration on the preparation and he could feel his passion for the food.

  “That’ll be perfect for you tomorrow Ishy. You just need to reheat it at school,” Mr Kahn said proudly. “Here, take some of this special hot curry powder. But only use one teaspoon of it. It gives it that extra kick.”

  When the food was prepared for Ishy to take in the next day, Ishy had a quick look. Even looking at the dish directly was enough to make his eyes water. He did not envy Mikey eating it, not one little bit.

  7

  THE NEXT DAY WHEN THE bell rang and the gang met after school, it was the moment of truth. Mikey arrived, bright red and sweating buckets; his hands were clammy and he kept blinking due to the sweat running in his eyes. The whole gang was nervous. Their hearts were pounding like drumbeats as soon as the bell rang.

  “Are you okay Mikey?” asked Emma.

  “Yeah, this happens when I get nervous,” Mikey replied.

  “Don’t worry Mikey, this idea is flawless,” reassured Oscar.

  “Yeah, don’t get so worked up,” added Reece.

  “It’s not just that…I’ve been holding in that curry ever since lunch when Ishy warmed it up for me! I’ve been fighting it ever since,” Mikey explained.

  “Yeah guys, judging by the look of him we shouldn’t waste much time. We need to go right now,” Ishy insisted.

  The group marched to the shop as quickly as they could with Mikey slowly waddling, like a bloated penguin, behind them. They had to move quickly, otherwise Mikey would explode before they even made it to the shop.

  The plan was simple: Emma had to distract Miss Primrose at the counter, while Oscar and Reece prepare the REEKFEST 4000, then Ishy had to give Mikey the signal for when to ‘let rip’.

  The group walked into the shop, their hearts beating like drums due to the nerves.

  Miss Primrose snarled at them as they walked in, before sniggering as she spotted Mikey. “Well look who it is!” she cackled. “Come for second helpings have we?”

  Miss Primrose approached Mikey slowly. She stared at him intensely; there was something quite hypnotic about her eyes, they could almost send a person into a trance. It looked as though Miss Primrose was about to make an example out of Mikey again but Emma diverted her attention so the boys could set up the plan.

  “Miss Primrose, this jar of frog’s eyes looks very… interesting. I’d very much love to know what sweets they are made of,” Emma said.

  Miss Primrose rolled her eyes at the inconvenience before revealing a crooked smile. Another potential victim, she thought as she slithered like a serpent towards Emma and the jar to which she referred. “Well, these sweets are awfully special. Quite a unique taste I must say. You know what, my dear, I will even let you try one free of charge to see if you like them,” said Miss Primrose as she drew closer and closer to Emma.

  She grabbed one of the ‘frog’s eyes’ out of the jar and reached out to Emma. As it drew ever closer to her mouth, everyone was positive that it was a real frog’s eye.

  “Oh no, I couldn’t possibly have one for free,” said Emma and she slowly backed away, thrusting the frog’s eye back towards the grinning Miss Primrose.

  “Oh dear child, don’t worry; I insist. It’s only fair that a sweet little child gets her just desserts,” Miss Primrose murmured.

  A hiss broke the tension as Miss Primrose’s cat leapt forward snatching the eye from her outstretched hand. It seemed that the cat was very keen on frog’s eyes!

  Oscar knew there was now no more time to spare. They had to act before she grabbed another.

  “Now,” he whispered to Ishy.

  Ishy was hoping for more of a dramatic countdown but Mikey could not wait any longer.

  “10…9…8…7…” Ishy muttered to Mikey.

  “6 5 4 3 2 1!” Mikey called out as quickly as he could before letting rip.

  It was the biggest, smelliest fart Mikey had ever done. It was the loudest fart any of them had ever heard. It was the loudest fart any of them had heard about! It was as if the entire world went silent just so that fart might exist.

  The foul, disgusting gas that Mikey released swam past Ishy, pushed past Oscar and Reece, and crawled past Emma, that demon fart that seemed to have a mind of its own as it dived into the face of Miss Primrose!

  You could almost hear the impact as it landed on her face. Miss Primrose stumbled a few steps back as it slammed into her.

  Silence filled the shop. But Mikey began to feel the aftermath. “Houston…we have a problem,” Mikey said in horror.

  Yeah, that’s right. Mikey had followed through, and although he had delivered the fart the gang knew he was capable of – he certainly didn’t do his pants any favours.

  Miss Primrose began assessing the fart in the air – she even stuck her tongue out into thin air to taste it. Although she was repulsed by the smell she was determined to track down the culprit.

  It didn’t take her longer than a few seconds to direct her attention straight at Mikey.

  “You!” she screamed. “How dare you spread your rotten bowel gas in my shop!”

  She was halfway to Mikey before Oscar and Reece yelled, “Leg it!”

  The gang only had a few seconds, as the REEKFEST 4000 was about to explode. They turned and ran, diving out of the doorway before the shop shook with the exploding rumble of the REEKFEST 4000.

  They turned around and saw an oppressive dark-green gas fill the windows and slowly begin to sneak out of the cracks of the windows and doors.

  The gang looked on at the shop. Surely Miss Primrose would require nose surgery and a team of experts to eliminate the vulgar stench that would linger there for days. The plan had succeeded. The group were overjoyed…all except Mikey who simply said, “I really need to change my pants!”

  8

  THE NEXT DAY OSCAR FELT refreshed, like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Miss Primrose had been driven from the shop and it wouldn’t take long to track down Mr McNulty. Life was good.

  As Oscar walked to school, he saw men wearing gas masks entering the shop and no sign of Miss Primrose.

  Job done, Oscar thought as he walked past.

  To top it off, the only allied casualty was Mikey’s pants, this was a good plan that came together. But this feeling of relief, bliss and sheer delight was very short-lived.

  As Oscar entered school that day he noticed his year group lined up in military fashion in the playground. As more pupils in his year group got to school that day they were s
oon directed to join this intimidating-looking formation.

  Oscar stood himself next to Emma in the line-up.

  “What’s going on?” Oscar whispered to Emma.

  “Beats me,” she replied. “As soon as anyone in our year group got here, teachers were directing them to line up here. You don’t think it’s to do with ‘stinkergate’ do you?”

  Before Oscar could answer, the playground was forced silent as the head teacher, Mr Fazey, walked into the playground to address them.

  Mr Fazey wasn’t what you expect your typical head teacher to look like. He certainly saw himself as very rock’n’roll and always tried to be as mellow as possible. It was fair to say he modelled himself on Elvis Presley. He had the big Elvis hair, the Elvis swagger in his walk and he even sported the tight Elvis leather trousers.

  It wasn’t too scary seeing Mr Fazey approach the year group. He was always very laid back and chilled. What was scary, well actually more like terrifying, was the person walking directly behind him – and that was Miss Primrose.

  Mr Fazey and Miss Primrose approached the year group in the playground. Miss Primrose had a dark purple handkerchief that she continuously held to her nose.

  “How can she be standing?” Oscar whispered to Emma.

  “Maybe the stink bomb wasn’t as strong as legend suggests,” Emma muttered back.

  Mr Fazey had a megaphone in his hand to address the year group. He was extremely softly spoken, so he carried a megaphone everywhere he went. He raised the megaphone and slowly began talking.

  “Okay guys, so, I believe there was an incident yesterday at Miss Primrose’s sweet shop which has left her shop needing emergency cleansing. This isn’t cool guys. I’m hoping rather than Miss Primrose point out the culprit, that person will be honest and come forward and accompany me and Miss Primrose to my office immediately,” announced Mr Fazey.

  “Culprit?” Emma whispered to Oscar. “Surely he means culprits?”

  None of the kids in the playground stepped forward to claim responsibility for ‘stinkergate’ as it was being referred to in the playground.