Laiden's Daughter
Page 15
“What kind of brother would I be if I let ye leave, to just wander the countryside trying to find a new home? I swore me allegiance to ye, Aishlinn.” For the first time in his life, Duncan had succumbed to desperation. He had blurted his answer and could only pray it would work. He simply could not tell her how he felt, at least not yet. He wasn’t sure himself just what all these feelings were that were bouncing around inside his heart and interfering with the logical part of his mind.
“Then why,” she asked, her voice soft and low, “Do you ignore me? Have I done something to offend you?” She had been trying to figure out for days now, just what she had done to make him avoid her.
He let out a heavy sigh. “Nay. Ye’ve done nothing wrong. I’ve been busy.” It wasn’t an out and out lie. “And, I was tryin’ to give ya room to find yer own way, to make new friends.”
“I do not understand. Can I not make friends and have you for one as well?” she asked. “Or am I allotted only so many?”
His scowl softened as he chuckled. “Nay,” he said knowing full well she could have as many female friends as she wanted. ‘Twas the men that bothered him.
“Aishlinn, I am sincerely sorry that I hurt yer feelings. I’m a daft fool of a man and I beg ya forgive me for it.”
It was quite difficult for her to stay angry with him -- she felt so beholden to him for all he had done for her. He did appear sincere and perhaps he had been quite busy with his duties. She searched his face and felt he told her the truth.
“I’ll forgive you, Duncan. I know you are a very busy man and I’ll not take up anymore of your time. But,” she said, hoping that she might not sound weak or foolish when she asked her next question.
“But what, lass?”
“But could you, at least on occasion when you see me, could you not run in the other direction?” She could not admit that the first time he had done that it had nearly ripped her heart from her chest. She had to bite her tongue to keep from crying over it now.
The hurt in her voice brought a tremendous amount of guilt to his stomach. Though his intentions had been to protect her, he had in fact, ended up hurting her. “I do so promise.” He thought about taking her in his arms then, and kissing her from the top of her head to the tips of her toes. Holding himself in, he righted his shoulders and bowed to her. He had to leave the room before he did just that.
Fifteen
Though it was rather difficult for Duncan to hold his tongue and say nothing of his feelings for Aishlinn, he did make a concentrated effort to spend more time with her. It was both a pleasure and an agony to be so near her and not touch or kiss her. But if having some of his time meant that much to her, ‘twas the least he could do.
Aishlinn had finally convinced Isobel to allow her to work in order to earn her keep. Though Isobel would have chosen more refined duties, she had relented and allowed Aishlinn to help in the kitchens. It was a job that brought great joy to Aishlinn’s heart, but none to Isobel’s. The only condition put upon the agreement was that she could work only in the mornings. Isobel did not want to risk the young woman over doing it to the point of exhaustion. When Aishlinn had asked to move from the room next to Duncan’s, and into the solar with the other non-married women, Isobel had adamantly refused.
Aishlinn enjoyed working among the other clansmen and women because it afforded her the opportunity make friends and a chance to learn the Gaelic. She found it difficult to roll her r’s but refused to give up. Within a few days however she was picking up a few useful phrases and words.
She would often see Rowan and Findley about the castle grounds. She thought them both fine men and was glad to have them for her foster brothers. They made Aishlinn feel quite welcome and on a few occasions, they had even helped with bringing in supplies and stocking the larders.
Manghus was staying close to his own cottage because his wife was due to have their first bairn and he wanted not to be far from her. On occasion Tall Gowan would bring his daughters to the castle when he had business to discuss with Duncan. Aishlinn would volunteer to keep the four little girls company while the men discussed whatever it was that men of their ilk were fond of discussing. Aishlinn truly enjoyed the time she was able to spend with the little girls, for it was the closest thing to having her own children that she would ever get.
Nearly every day she would see Black Richard, Tall Thomas, Daniel and Wee William. When they weren’t practicing, they could often be found huddled together in some deep, manly sort of conversation. Black Richard appeared to be more refined and better educated than the other men he referred to as the best of his friends, but still, he was just as fierce as the rest of them.
There were many times when Aishlinn would find a dozen children surrounding Wee William, clamoring for his attention or a ride upon his back. The man looked positively silly as he walked across the grounds with a child clinging to each leg and an arm while another rode on his back. The little ones would squeal with delight as they rode along on the gentle giant or when he would chase after them pretending to be a ferocious monster.
Duncan would escort Aishlinn and Bree to dinner each night but he would encourage them to sit with those lads and lasses closer to their own ages. Aishlinn conceded, although she would have preferred to have her meals with Duncan and his men. While she was making new friends, and gaining more brothers than she knew what to do with, she still found herself daydreaming of Duncan.
Often times when her work in the kitchens was complete, she would sneak away to help the other young women clean various rooms of the castle. Although she knew Isobel would be displeased with her if she learned she was doing far more than working in the kitchens, Aishlinn was not one to sit about with idle hands.
On one particularly splendid afternoon, Aishlinn went outside to catch a bit of fresh air and to see if anyone wanted help tending the gardens. Having found she was not needed she decided to enjoy a walk around the castle grounds. They seemed to stretch on forever with all the hills and small glens. There were large stables and barns as well as little cottages scattered here and there. Just to the west of the castle, the tiny village seemed to be undergoing an expansion and its residents were in the process of building a kirk.
She stood at the crest of a hill and watched a group of children playing on the training field. They were pretending to be fierce warriors and play fought with sticks. The sight of them made her heart ache for bairns and a family of her own.
She had been watching them for a while when Black Richard approached her. He wore dark trews and a blue tunic and looked rather handsome with his black hair waiving in the breeze.
“Good day, Aishlinn!” he said with a smile upon his face. “Yer looking well this day.”
“Tapadh leat.” She thanked him in Gaelic, quite pleased with her use of the language.
He returned with “Se do bheatha,” raising a brow, impressed with her Gaelic.
Aishlinn smiled and returned to the English. “I’m afraid I don’t know enough yet to hold a conversation, Black Richard.”
“Tis all right lass. Ye be catchin’ on quite well!”
He bent and plucked a long blade of grass from the ground. “How are ya liking Castle Gregor thus far?” he asked.
Her face beamed. “Oh, I like it very much! ‘Tis a grand place and everyone has been so kind to me.”
“Aye, we are a kind lot of people!” Black Richard chuckled. He rubbed the piece of grass between his fingers as he looked off into the distance. “Are ya making many friends as well?”
“Aye, I am,” she answered. “Everyone has been go kind. And I’ve got more brothers now than I know what to do with!”
He turned to her, looking rather puzzled. “What do ya mean, lass?”
Smiling, she told him, “When I mentioned Duncan, Rowan, Tall Gowan and the others were my brothers, the other lads and men asked could they be as well.” She smiled at him innocently. “I grew up with three brothers who were not at all kind to me. Growing up I wished for k
inder brothers and now I have so many!”
Richard tried not to laugh at her. He knew the lads here were enamored with Aishlinn. “Are ye sure of that, lass?”
Confused, she asked, “Sure of what?”
“Are ya sure they no’ be wantin’ to be more than just brothers to ya?”
She was shocked at such a notion. “Nay!” she said. Silly man she thought to herself. Perhaps he had become over-heated during his sparring and he wasn’t thinking clearly.
“Why ya be thinkin’ that, lass?”
She smiled at him as if he were a fool. “I am a plain woman, Richard. The lads are after Bree’s affections that way, not mine!”
He turned and looked at her with a most serious expression. “Aishlinn, ye no’ be plain.”
She studied him for a moment. First Duncan, then the others and now Black Richard. While she appreciated their kind intentions she believed not one of them. Shaking her head she said, “Tis kind of you to say that Black Richard. But ye needn’t do so.” She was trying not to be rude. She simply knew better.
Black Richard took in a deep breath of air before letting it out slowly. “Aishlinn, I be tellin’ the truth. Ye be not plain. Ye be a fine, beautiful woman.”
Aishlinn was taken aback and felt her skin blush. These Highlanders certainly were fond of saying whatever was on their minds. “Richard, please do not say that which isn’t true!”
“I speak no lies, lass,” he said softly. She truly did not know just how beautiful she was.
Aishlinn wished he would simply go away. “Nay. Isobel and Bree are beautiful, Black Richard, not I.” She could feel her face growing redder and she had to look away from him. “I am plain.”
With a raised brow and look of curiosity to his face, he asked, “Now, who here has told ya that lass?”
Aishlinn thought about it for a long moment and could think of not one person here who had said anything even vaguely unkind to her. “Well, none here have.” The people here were far too kind to say otherwise.
“Then who be tellin’ ya yer plain?” He asked. Aishlinn remained quiet as she stared at the ground. She was growing more uncomfortable with the conversation and wondered if he would think her daft if she suddenly turned and ran away from him.
“Would it be the brothers ya spoke of? Them that was no’ kind to ya? Them that mistreated ya?” he asked.
Aishlinn shot him a scathing look that, had he known her better, would have told him that he was walking in unsafe territory. She chose not to respond to his question. She barely knew this man. And although she was certain he was merely trying to be kind to her, she felt his questions a little too personal.
“Twas them then,” he said quietly. “Now, may I ask why ye’d be wantin’ to believe mean and unkind brothers who mistreated ya? Do ya no’ think lass that ‘twas them that no’ be tellin’ ya the truth? ‘Twas them that lied to ya when they said ya be plain?”
Honestly the thought had never entered her mind. All that she had ever heard from her brothers, as well as her father, was that she was plain and ugly. No man could or would ever want her. She would never be as beautiful as her mum. How many times had they told her such things? Now she was here, living in a most grand castle surrounded by good and kind people; decent people who had gone out of their way to make her feel welcomed and safe.
Black Richard could tell she was thinking hard on what he said. Chuckling slightly, he shook his head. “Lass, I be thinkin’ that a thousand men could come to ya and tell ya yer beautiful and ye’d no’ be believin’ a one of ’em!”
She studied him more closely and wondered if she could trust him. Perhaps he was one of those men who said sweet and romantic things to a woman in order to obtain what he wanted. It was the only plausible explanation she could come up with at the moment. And why he would want such things from her she could not understand. She would ask Duncan of it later.
“Aishlinn,” Black Richard said with a most sweet and sincere smile. “Would ya do me the most profound honor and allow me to escort ya to the evenin’ meal this night?”
She had no idea how to interpret his invitation. Did he mean it in a brotherly fashion or did he have something else upon his mind? Brotherly attentions she could deal with. Anything other than that and she would simply not know what to do.
Black Richard was beginning to like the fact that he could easily read her face. ‘Twas true he thought she was a beautiful young woman with a good spirit and heart about her. He had noticed that the first night he had met her. “I assure ye me intentions are entirely honorable, lass!”
She stood utterly dumbstruck and speechless. Did he really want to escort her this night? Was he asking to court her? It simply could not be. There had to be a reasonable explanation but for the life of her she could not figure it out. She knew not what to say.
“Are ye all right, Aishlinn?” he asked. She looked as though she were about to faint. He had asked many a lass for such a privilege but none had looked at him as if he had suddenly sprouted a second head.
She mulled it over in her mind. She had very strong feelings for Duncan but knew he did not feel the same for her in return. Certain she was that Duncan deserved a finer, better and more beautiful woman than she, Aishlinn had pushed any romantic thoughts of him from her mind days ago. At least she had tried to. Was Black Richard sincere in what he said? She wondered if given the chance could he make her stomach tumble and her heart want to leap from her chest as it did when Duncan was near?
Just as she was ready to give Richard her answer Duncan appeared from behind them. Aishlinn was surprised to see him here for she usually saw him only in the morning and when he came to escort her to the evening meal.
“Black Richard! Aishlinn!” he said as he squeezed his tall and muscular body in between the two of them. “How are ye this fine and sunny day?” He asked with a smile upon his face. He gave Black Richard a wink and a pat on his back.
Black Richard rolled his eyes as he took a step away in order to give Duncan some room. He had been wondering for a time now if Duncan held any feelings for Aishlinn. He had been waiting in the background to see if there were any signs that something more might be going on between the two of them. Having not witnessed any overt actions on Duncan’s part, Black Richard felt it fine and proper to finally tell the beautiful lass of his intentions. The fact that Duncan showed up at this very moment told him that perhaps he did have some feelings for her.
“Hello, Duncan!” Aishlinn smiled at him. “How was your practice this day?”
“Fine, lass, fine!”
Aishlinn noticed then that he had a quite peculiar smile upon his face as if he were forcing himself to look more cheerful than he might actually be. “Are you all right, Duncan?”
A look of shock came about his face. What on earth, she supposed, was the matter with him?
“Me, lass? Why I be as right as rain!” he answered, perhaps a bit too cheerfully.
She did not think he was telling her the truth. Glad to see him, she decided not to push the matter further.
She had to step around Duncan in order to see Black Richard. To Duncan she said, “Black Richard has asked if he could escort me to the evening meal.”
Black Richard cleared his throat and smiled. Duncan stared at him. “He did, did he?”
“Aye, I did,” Black Richard told him as he crossed his arms over his chest.
“Do you think that would be all right, Duncan?” Aishlinn asked.
The two men stared at each other like two bulls ready to do battle. “What, lass?” Duncan asked, not really focused on Aishlinn at the moment. His mind was busy coming up with creative ways to take Black Richard’s life from him.
“Do you think that it would be all right?” she repeated, “for Black Richard to escort me to the evening meal?”
Duncan did not take his eyes off Black Richard. The last thing he wanted was Black Richard, or anyone else for that matter, to woo Aishlinn. Being stuck between the proverbial rock and h
ard place, he felt he had no choice at the moment but to smile and tell her, “Why, I see no problem with it, lass. Black Richard is above all else a fine man who would treat a young lass such as ye with the utmost respect. Why, he would no’ even think to make any overt advances towards an innocent young girl. Isn’t that right, Richard?”
“Aye,” Black Richard said. “Aishlinn is a fine woman. I’d be treatin’ her in a dignified and respectable manner,” he said, still smiling.
Aishlinn could not read between the lines of their conversation and did not pick up on the subtle nuances. But each man knew where the other stood.
Black Richard continued. “A fine, beautiful lass such as Aishlinn, deserves nothin’ more than the best, wouldn’t ya say Duncan?”
“Aye, I would,” Duncan said as his jaws clenched.
They were silent for a few moments. Aishlinn felt something was afoot but was not quite certain what it could be. Men often confused her. Deciding she would never be able to make much sense of them she said, “Fine then. Black Richard, I will allow you to escort me this night.”
Black Richard smiled wryly at Duncan before walking towards Aishlinn. He lifted her hand and kissed the back of it ever so tenderly. The gesture brought a blush to her cheeks. “Tapadh leat,” he said to her.
Aishlinn smiled as she said, “Se do bheatha.”
Quite surprised, Duncan turned to look at her. “When did ya learn the Gaelic?”
“Ya should pay closer attention, Duncan,” Black Richard said as he walked away. “Elst ya might miss out on something special and important.” He winked at Duncan, bowed to Aishlinn and bid her good day.
******
After Black Richard left, Aishlinn shared parts of their conversation with Duncan. She wanted a man’s perspective, as she had no experience in matters of the heart or romance. Duncan was, after all, her foster brother. Even though she held more than sisterly feelings for him, she felt he was the best person to go to for such things.