Cream Puff Murder

by Joanne Fluke

  “Not unless an ant is crawling across the floor.” Hannah turned to Norman who had the remote control. “Okay Norman. Let’s see what Moishe’s been up to while I’ve been at The Cookie Jar today.”

  “It looks like he just took a big mouthful,” Michelle said. She was holding Moishe, and he was purring so loudly they could all hear him. Evidently he didn’t mind being caught in the act as long as he got star billing on Hannah’s television screen.

  “But he’s eating it,” Andrea commented, and Hannah thought she sounded slightly disappointed.

  The Moishe on the screen swallowed and then moved to the water bowl to take a drink. A moment later, he was back at the food bowl, head buried up to his ears and chewing.

  “Maybe he does eat it all!” Andrea said, watching Hannah’s cat eat.

  Michelle lifted Moishe up from her lap, held him a moment to judge his weight, and put him back down again. “I don’t think so,” she said. “I’m almost sure he’s not gaining weight.”

  “And he would be if he ate rations for four cats twice a day,” Hannah said, frowning slightly. “Just wait and see what he does when he’s full. That’s probably when he hides the rest of the food.”

  Several minutes passed as they all watched Moishe eat. Never had a cat’s dietary habits been so closely observed. At last Moishe pulled back from the food bowl and began to wash his face. This lasted for almost three minutes, and then he ducked his head in his food bowl again.

  “The Big Guy’s got a lot of food in his mouth,” Norman observed. “His cheeks are puffed out.”

  At first Hannah thought Norman was anthropomorphizing, but Moishe’s cheeks did look fuller. Perhaps that was something a dentist would notice.

  “He’s going to the refrigerator!” Andrea sounded shocked. “He doesn’t know how to open the door, does he, Hannah?”

  Hannah laughed. “No. He’s a smart cat, but he hasn’t figured that one out yet…at least I don’t think he has.”

  Almost in tandem, they all leaned forward as Moishe passed by the front of the refrigerator and ducked into the narrow area between the side of the kitchen appliance and the broom closet. He had to squeeze to get in, but he wiggled his way out of sight in the narrow space.

  “That’s where he always loses his duck’s foot,” Hannah said. “And all the times I’ve fished it out for him with the yardstick, he could have gotten it himself!”

  “He must be hiding his food back there,” Michelle guessed.

  “I hope he doesn’t get stuck!” Andrea exclaimed, and all three of them turned to look at her. “What?” she asked, and a moment later, she gave an embarrassed laugh. “I guess that didn’t happen, since he’s sitting right here on Michelle’s lap.”

  A moment later Moishe emerged, and it was Hannah’s turn to gasp.

  “What is it?” Andrea asked her.

  “He came out headfirst and there’s no room to turn around back there!”

  “There must be a hole or something,” Norman suggested.

  “Let’s go look,” Hannah said, heading for the kitchen at a trot. She unlocked the door to the broom closet, took out the bag of cat food, and motioned to Norman.

  “I see it!” Norman said, leaning in with the flashlight and shining it on the wall near the floor. “There’s the loose board I told you about when I fished out his duck’s foot. The Big Guy’s got a nice little entrance to the broom closet back there. But there’s nothing on the floor. What’s he doing with his food?”

  “Putting it back in the bag?” Hannah guessed, looking inside the bag. “It didn’t occur to me before, but I haven’t bought any cat food since Mike gave me the Kitty Valet. This bag should be just about gone by now, but it’s still three-quarters full.”

  “You’re right! He’s putting it back in the bag!” Michelle sounded absolutely astonished.

  “That’s the only logical conclusion. He eats what he wants and then he puts the rest back where it came from.”

  Andrea laughed. “He eats and then he puts away the leftovers. That’s so cute.”

  “If you’ve got a hammer and nails I’ll fix that board right now,” Norman offered.

  Hannah was about to say yes, when she reconsidered. “Thanks, but I don’t think I want it fixed. Moishe’s playing a game with his new feeder. It keeps him occupied, it’s not hurting anything, and he seems to enjoy it. I’ll just let him do it for a while, at least until he finds something else to intrigue him.”

  “I think you’re probably wise,” Norman said.

  Andrea nodded. “Me, too.”

  “If you keep him from his game, he’s just going to find another one,” Michelle said, “and maybe it’ll be more destructive.”

  “One mystery solved,” Hannah said, heading for the coffeepot for a second cup. “Let’s go watch another tape from the mall and see if it’ll shed any light on the second mystery we have to solve.”

  LOIS BROWN’S LEMON COOKIES

  Preheat oven to 350 degrees F., rack in the middle position.

  1/2 cup softened butter (1 stick, 1/4 pound)

  3/4 cup white (granulated) sugar

  1 egg, beaten (just whip it up in a glass with a fork)

  1 Tablespoon lemon zest***

  2 teaspoons lemon juice

  1 teaspoon baking powder

  1/4 teaspoon baking soda

  1/4 teaspoon salt

  12/3 cups flour (pack it down in the cup when you measure it)

  1/2 cup milk (I used whole milk)

  Topping:

  1/4 cup lemon juice

  3/4 cup white (granulated) sugar

  Hannah’s 1st Note: These cookies are wonderfully lemony and quite tart. You may want to sprinkle them with powdered sugar before you serve them to those who like them sweeter.

  Beat the butter and the sugar together until they’re light and fluffy.

  Add the beaten egg, lemon zest, and lemon juice. Mix it all up together.

  Mix in the baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Mix well.

  Mix in half of the flour and half of the milk. That’s approximately a cup of flour and a quarter cup of milk. (You don’t have to be exact—just eyeball it.)

  Stir everything all up, and then add the remaining flour and the remaining milk. Mix well.

  Drop by teaspoons onto an ungreased cookie sheet. Make these cookies small, about the size of a cherry. If you make them too large, they’ll spread out on the cookie sheet and crumble when you remove them.

  Bake at 350 degrees F. for 12 to 14 minutes. (Mine took 13 minutes.)

  Hannah’s 2nd Note: I use parchment paper because then I can just slide it onto a wire rack after the cookies come out of the oven.

  While the first pan of cookies is baking, mix up the topping. 299

  Heat the lemon juice just a bit in the microwave. (The sugar will dissolve more easily if the juice is warm.) Add the sugar and stir it all up. Place the topping next to your wire cooling rack, along with a pastry brush.

  When the cookies come out of the oven, remove them to a wire rack with a piece of foil placed under it or, if you’ve used parchment paper, just pull the paper with the cookies from the cookie sheet and onto the wire rack.

  Brush the topping onto the hot cookies. The faster you do this, the quicker the topping will dry into a glaze.

  Yield: Approximately 4 dozen cookies, depending on cookie size.

  Hannah’s 3rd Note: This recipe can be doubled.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  “No dialogue, no story, no lights, no music,” Hannah said with a sigh. “No wonder these tapes are so boring.”

  “You forgot no action,” Norman reminded her, his finger on the fast-forward button. They’d watched the first third of the tape, and so far the Snack Shack was in shadows and absolutely nothing had happened. “There’s nobody in there to…whoa!” He stopped as the door opened and the lights clicked on. “Here we go! It’s show time!”

  “It’s Ronni,” Hannah identified the blonde who walked to the far e
nd of the room and took several small bottles from behind the counter. “And that’s diet green tea. This must be when she starts drinking Green-Teanis.”

  Michelle looked puzzled. “I wonder why she didn’t change out of her exercise outfit for the party.”

  “Maybe she didn’t have anything tighter,” Hannah offered her opinion.

  “That wasn’t nice!” Andrea chided her.

  “Maybe not, but I bet you were thinking the same thing.”

  A shade of pink very much resembling the pink of the pillow shams in Hannah’s guest room started to appear at Andrea’s neckline. It moved slowly up to the top of her cheeks, and Andrea gave a guilty sigh. “You’re right,” she said. “I was.”

  “Here comes the rest of the party,” Norman said, pointing at the screen. “Mike’s got your cream puffs, Hannah.”

  Hannah watched Mike come in, carrying her tray of cream puffs. She noticed that he’d stuck a candle into each puff, but the platter was covered with plastic wrap. He set it behind the counter, where no one could see it, and gave Ronni a big kiss on the lips that lasted a lot longer than Hannah wanted it to. Then the partygoers began to file in, and Mike took a proprietary place at Ronni’s side with his arm around her waist.

  “Mike’s acting like the host,” Andrea said, and then she glanced over at Hannah. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

  “Why not? It’s true.”

  “Yes, but…oh look! There’s Mayor Bascomb!” Andrea sounded grateful that something else had come up on the screen.

  Before much more time had passed, the room was filled with people. Someone had contributed a case of beer, and others drank soft drinks or concoctions from the blender that one of the sheriff’s deputies was manning behind the counter.

  “Lonnie,” Michelle breathed, and Hannah turned to glance at her youngest sister. Michelle looked worried, and Hannah wondered if she feared that Lonnie would give the birthday girl the same kind of greeting that Mike had. But instead of heading over to greet Ronni, he gave a little wave in her general direction and got himself a beer from the case at the end of the counter. Then he started talking to a couple of other deputies who were there, and Hannah saw Michelle visibly relax.

  “No women,” Norman said after another few minutes of watching.

  Hannah turned to look at him. “You’re right! It’s all men.”

  “Maybe that’s because she worked at the sheriff’s department, and it’s mostly men out there,” Michelle suggested.

  “Are you kidding?” Hannah just laughed. “There are a couple of women deputies, not to mention quite a few secretaries.”

  “Maybe she invited them and they didn’t come,” Norman suggested. But after a look from the three Swensen sisters, he gave up on that excuse.

  “There’s Tad,” Michelle said, pointing at the man who’d just walked in the door. “Just look at that gorgeous bouquet of flowers! Would a stalker bring his victim flowers?”

  “It does seem unusual,” Hannah said, thinking of what Tad’s nephew had confided to the class at Kiddie Korner and wondering if it was relevant.

  “What is she doing?” Michelle’s mouth fell open as she watched the screen. “Ronni won’t even take them! She’s pointing to the door, and…”

  “Tad’s leaving with the flowers,” Andrea said, just as shocked as Michelle. “And he looks really embarrassed. She must have said something mean to him.”

  “Look at her now. She’s laughing,” Norman said, and his brows knit together in a disapproving frown.

  “She’s laughing at him,” Hannah said.

  “I can’t help but feel sorry for him.” Michelle looked sympathetic. “Those flowers must have cost him a bundle.”

  “He looks like he’s ready to break down in tears,” Andrea commented as the security guard passed by the camera. “I wonder what Ronni said to him.”

  Hannah motioned to Norman. “Can you put it on pause?” And then she turned to Michelle. “Find out.”

  “Find out what Ronni said to him?”

  “Right. Lonnie was there. He must have heard it. Call him, and we’ll wait.”

  It took only a few moments to get the answer, and when they did, they could scarcely believe their ears. “She actually called him a little toad?” Hannah asked.

  “That’s right. Lonnie repeated her words exactly. She said, Get out of here you little toad! I wouldn’t invite you to my birthday party if you were the last man on earth.”

  “That’s really harsh,” Norman said, shaking his head. “No wonder he looked so dejected.”

  They watched for another few minutes, but it was more of the same. And then Mike lifted Ronni up on the counter and she said something to the crowd that had them applauding. Everyone began gathering up glasses, bottles, and snacks. Mike went behind the counter to get the platter of cream puffs, and in less than two minutes the room was vacant and the lights were off again.

  “They moved the party to the Jacuzzi,” Hannah said, knowing she was right. “And that’s all we’re going to see on this tape.”

  Norman fast-forwarded to the end just in case someone had left something and come back to get it, but the lights stayed off and the Snack Shack remained vacant. He rewound the tape, returned it to the sleeve, and shrugged. “That was a waste of time.”

  “Not for me,” Michelle said, and Hannah knew she was thinking about how honest Lonnie had been in his account of the party and how completely unromantic he’d been around Ronni.

  “Not for me, either,” Hannah said for exactly the opposite reason.

  “What now?” Andrea said, after Michelle and Norman had left. Michelle was meeting Lonnie at the hospital to visit with Rick’s wife, and then they were going out for pizza. Norman had promised Carrie and Delores he’d drop by Granny’s Attic to help them move some heavy antiques. They would meet up later at The Corner Tavern for dinner, and they had a reservation at seven.

  Hannah glanced at her watch. “It’s only three. We’ve got four hours until dinner.”

  “I know. I’m thinking about running out to Heavenly Bodies and catching up on my exercises. I didn’t go this morning.”

  “Neither did I, but you know that already. You discussed it with Norman last night.”

  Andrea looked a little nervous. “I hope you don’t mind, but it was for your own good. I was really worried you’d fall asleep on the drive home. I hope you stayed over…unless he drove you home, of course.”

  “Yes.”

  “Yes, what?”

  “I didn’t drive home alone last night.”

  “So Norman took you home? Or you stayed with him?”

  “Yes.”

  Andrea stamped her foot so hard Hannah was almost afraid she’d poke a hole in the ceiling of Phil and Sue’s downstairs unit.

  “Which! I want to know which!”

  Hannah took pity on her sister. Andrea looked ready to fall on the floor and start beating her fists on the rug in frustration. “I stayed with Norman.”

  “Oh. Well…good.” There was a moment of silence, and then Andrea spoke again. “I don’t suppose you’re going to tell me anything about it. I mean, where you slept and…and things like that?”

  “No.”

  “Oh, well.” Andrea sighed deeply. “I didn’t figure you would. So do you want to follow me out to the mall and finish our exercise routines for the day?”

  “Sure. It beats mopping the floor and watching it dry.”

  They parked right next to each other at the back door. Andrea got out of her Volvo first, and she was standing at the entrance with her hands on her hips when Hannah joined her.

  “Well! If that doesn’t beat all!” she exclaimed, clearly frustrated. “My key doesn’t work, and the sign says they’re closed.”

  Hannah stepped closer to read the sign. The outer door to Heavenly Bodies was closed, and the sign said they wouldn’t reopen until six o’clock tomorrow morning. “Does that mean we get to drive to Bertanelli’s for a pizza instead?” she a
sked, only half-joking.

  “Not if you want to fit into your dress for Mother’s party. Let’s go in the mall and see what happened.”

  There weren’t very many people shopping. The mall was practically deserted. When they approached the security station, they saw Frank sitting behind the desk at the front. “Hi, ladies,” he said.

  “Hi, Frank.” Hannah took the lead. “We were hoping that you or Tad would be working. We’ve got a question.”

  “Tad doesn’t come on until seven tonight, but I’d be happy to answer your question. Is it about Miss Ward’s murder?”

  Andrea shook her head. “It’s about Heavenly Bodies. Do you know why it’s closed?”

  “Sure do. They closed at noon because there was a problem with the thermostat. It’s fixed now. The industrial heating and air-conditioning guys just left.”

  “Can we go in and do our exercises?” Andrea asked. “Hannah and I missed class this morning.”

  Frank shrugged. “I don’t see why not. I’ll activate the locks for you. It might be pretty cold in some of the rooms, but you can always hop in the Jacuzzi if you get chilled.”

  “Thanks, but no thanks!” Hannah shivered slightly. “The Jacuzzi is where Ronni was killed. I’m not overly superstitious, but I don’t really want to get in there again.”

  “I can understand that. As a matter of fact, most of the other members feel the same way. That’s why the owner replaced the hot tub with a new one. He even took out the old bar and bar stools and replaced them with other furniture. The only thing that hasn’t been changed is the wallpaper, and they’ll probably get around to that one of these days.”

  “They redecorated so fast?” It was clear that Andrea was impressed.

  “That’s right. The owner said it was a shame that nobody was using it, and he wanted to change the whole look. Instead of all that latticework, it’s a thatched hut, now, with wooden shutters that fold down to make tables on the inside. Wait until you see it. It’s really nice.”