The Compleat Bolo

by Keith Laumer

  Retief sat up and reached for a cigar.

  "Mr. Tony and Skaw were pals, eh?"

  "He hated Skaw's guts. But with him it was business. Mister, you got a gun?"

  "A two-mm needler. Why?"

  "The orders Cap'n give was to change course fer Alabaster. We're bypassin' Jorgensen's Worlds. We'll feel the course change any minute."

  Retief lit the cigar, reached under the mattress and took out a short-barreled pistol. He dropped it in his pocket, looked at Chip.

  "Maybe it was a good thought, at that. Which way to the Captain's cabin?"

  "This is it," Chip said softly. "You want me to keep an eye on who comes down the passage?"

  Retief nodded, opened the door and stepped into the cabin. The Captain looked up from his desk, then jumped up.

  "What do you think you're doing, busting in here?"

  "I hear you're planning a course change, Captain."

  "You've got damn big ears."

  "I think we'd better call in at Jorgensen's."

  "You do, huh?" The Captain sat down. "I'm in command of this vessel," he said. "I'm changing course for Alabaster."

  "I wouldn't find it convenient to go to Alabaster," Retief said. "So just hold your course for Jorgensen's."

  "Not bloody likely."

  "Your use of the word 'bloody' is interesting, Captain. Don't try to change course."

  The Captain reached for the mike on his desk, pressed the key.

  "Power Section, this is the Captain," he said. Retief reached across the desk, gripped the Captain's wrist.

  "Tell the mate to hold his present course," he said softly.

  "Let go my hand, buster," the Captain snarled. Eyes on Retief's, he eased a drawer open with his left hand, reached in. Retief kneed the drawer. The Captain yelped and dropped the mike.

  "You busted it, you-"

  "And one to go," Retief said. "Tell him."

  "I'm an officer of the Merchant Service!"

  "You're a cheapjack who's sold his bridge to a pack of back-alley hoods."

  "You can't put it over, hick."

  "Tell him."

  The Captain groaned and picked up the mike. "Captain to Power Section," he said. "Hold your present course until you hear from me." He dropped the mike and looked up at Retief.

  "It's eighteen hours yet before we pick up Jorgensen Control. You going to sit here and bend my arm the whole time?"

  Retief released the Captain's wrist and turned to the door.

  "Chip, I'm locking the door. You circulate around, let me know what's going on. Bring me a pot of coffee every so often. I'm sitting up with a sick friend."

  "Right, Mister. Keep an eye on that jasper; he's slippery."

  "What are you going to do?" the Captain demanded.

  Retief settled himself in a chair.

  "Instead of strangling you, as you deserve," he said, "I'm going to stay here and help you hold your course for Jorgensen's Worlds."

  The Captain looked at Retief. He laughed, a short bark.

  "Then I'll just stretch out and have a little nap, farmer. If you feel like dozing off sometime during the next eighteen hours, don't mind me."

  Retief took out the needler and put it on the desk before him.

  "If anything happens that I don't like," he said, "I'll wake you up. With this."

  "Why don't you let me spell you, Mister?" Chip said. "Four hours to go yet. You're gonna hafta be on yer toes to handle the landing."

  "I'll be all right, Chip. You get some sleep."

  "Nope. Many's the time I stood four, five watches runnin', back when I was yer age. I'll make another round."

  Retief stood up, stretched his legs, paced the floor, stared at the repeater instruments on the wall. Things had gone quietly so far, but the landing would be another matter. The Captain's absence from the bridge during the highly complex maneuvering would be difficult to explain…

  The desk speaker crackled.

  "Captain, Officer of the Watch here. Ain't it about time you was getting up here with the orbit figures?"

  Retief nudged the Captain. He awoke with a start, sat up.

  "Whazzat?" He looked wild-eyed at Retief.

  "Watch Officer wants orbit figures," Retief said, nodding toward the speaker.

  The Captain rubbed his eyes, shook his head, picked up the mike. Retief released the safety on the needler with an audible click.

  "Watch Officer, I'll… ah… get some figures for you right away. I'm… ah… busy right now."

  "What the hell you talking about, busy?" the speaker blared. "You ain't got them figures ready, you'll have a hell of a hot time getting 'em up in the next three minutes. You forgot your approach pattern or something?"

  "I guess I overlooked it," the Captain said, looking sideways at Retief. "I've been busy."

  "One for your side," Retief said. He reached for the Captain.

  "I'll make a deal," the Captain squalled. "Your life for-"

  Retief took aim and slammed a hard right to the Captain's jaw. He slumped to the floor.

  Retief glanced around the room, yanked wires loose from a motile lamp, trussed the man's hands and feet, stuffed his mouth with paper and taped it.

  Chip tapped at the door. Retief opened it and the chef stepped inside, looking at the man on the floor.

  "The jasper tried somethin', huh? Figured he would. What we goin' to do now?"

  "The Captain forgot to set up an approach, Chip. He outfoxed me."

  "If we overrun our approach pattern," Chip said, "we can't make orbit at Jorgensen's on automatic. And a manual approach-"

  "That's out. But there's another possibility."

  Chip blinked. "Only one thing you could mean, mister. But cuttin' out in a lifeboat in deep space is no picnic."

  "They're on the port side, aft, right?"

  Chip nodded. "Hot damn," he said. "Who's got the 'tater salad?"

  "We'd better tuck the skipper away out of sight."

  "In the locker."

  The two men carried the limp body to a deep storage chest, dumped it in, closed the lid.

  "He won't suffercate. Lid's a lousy fit."

  Retief opened the door and went into the corridor, Chip behind him.

  "Shouldn't oughta be nobody around now," the chef said. "Everybody's mannin' approach stations."

  At the D deck companionway, Retief stopped suddenly.

  "Listen."

  Chip cocked his head. "I don't hear nothin'," he whispered.

  "Sounds like a sentry posted on the lifeboat deck," Retief said softly.

  "Let's take him, mister."

  "I'll go down. Stand by, Chip."

  Retief started down the narrow steps, half stair, half ladder. Halfway, he paused to listen. There was a sound of slow footsteps, then silence. Retief palmed the needler, went down the last steps quickly, emerged in the dim light of a low-ceilinged room. The stern of a five-man lifeboat bulked before him.

  "Freeze, you!" a cold voice snapped.

  Retief dropped, rolled behind the shelter of the lifeboat as the whine of a power pistol echoed off metal walls. A lunge, and he was under the boat, on his feet. He jumped, caught the quick-access handle, hauled it down. The outer port cycled open.

  Feet scrambled at the bow of the boat. Retief whirled and fired. The guard rounded into sight and fell headlong. Above, an alarm bell jangled. Retief stepped on a stanchion, hauled himself into the open port. A yell rang, then the clatter of feet on the stair.

  "Don't shoot, mister!" Chip shouted.

  "All clear, Chip," Retief called.

  "Hang on. I'm comin' with ya!"

  Retief reached down, lifted the chef bodily through the port, slammed the lever home. The outer door whooshed, clanged shut.

  "Take number two, tie in! I'll blast her off," Chip said. "Been through a hundred 'bandon-ship drills…"

  Retief watched as the chef flipped levers, pressed a fat red button. The deck trembled under the lifeboat.

  "Blew the bay door
s," Chip said, smiling happily. "That'll cool them jaspers down." He punched a green button.

  "Look out, Jorgensen's!" With an ear-splitting blast, the stern rockets fired, a sustained agony of pressure…

  Abruptly, there was silence. Weightlessness. Contracting metal pinged loudly. Chip's breathing rasped in the stillness.

  "Pulled nine G's there for ten seconds," he gasped. "I gave her full emergency kickoff."

  "Any armament aboard our late host?"

  "A popgun. Time they get their wind, we'll be clear. Now all we got to do is set tight till we pick up a R-and-D from Svea Tower. Maybe four, five hours."

  "Chip, you're a wonder," Retief said. "This looks like a good time to catch that nap."

  "Me too," Chip said. "Mighty peaceful here, ain't it?"

  There was a moment's silence.

  "Durn!" Chip said softly.

  Retief opened one eye. "Sorry you came, Chip?"

  "Left my best carvin' knife jammed up 'tween Marbles' ribs," the chef said. "Comes o' doin' things in a hurry."

  5

  The blonde girl brushed her hair from her eyes and smiled at Retief.

  "I'm the only one on duty," she said. "I'm Anne-Marie."

  "It's important that I talk to someone in your government, miss," Retief said.

  The girl looked at Retief. "The men you want to see are Tove and Bo Bergman. They will be at the lodge by nightfall."

  "Then it looks like we go to the lodge," Retief said. "Lead on, Anne-Marie."

  "What about the boat?" Chip asked.

  "I'll send someone to see to it tomorrow," the girl said.

  "You're some gal," Chip said admiringly. "Dern near six feet, ain't ye? And built, too, what I mean."

  They stepped out of the door into a whipping wind.

  "Let's go across to the equipment shed and get parkas for you," Anne-Marie said. "It will be cold on the slopes."

  "Yeah," Chip said, shivering. "I've heard you folks don't believe in ridin' ever time you want to go a few miles uphill in a blizzard."

  "It will make us hungry," Anne-Marie said. "Then Chip will cook a wonderful meal for us all."

  Chip blinked. "Been cookin' too long," he muttered. "Didn't know it showed on me that way."

  Behind the sheds across the wind-scoured ramp abrupt peaks rose, snow-blanketed. A faint trail led across white slopes, disappearing into low clouds.

  "The lodge is above the cloud layer," Anne-Marie said. "Up there the sky is always clear."

  It was three hours later, and the sun was burning the peaks red, when Anne-Marie stopped, pulled off her woolen cap, and waved at the vista below.

  "There you see it," she said. "Our valley."

  "It's a mighty perty sight," Chip gasped. "Anything this tough to get a look at ought to be."

  Anne-Marie pointed. "There," she said. "The little red house by itself. Do you see it, Retief? It is my father's homeacre."

  Retief looked across the valley. Gaily painted houses nestled together, a puddle of color in the bowl of the valley.

  "I think you've led a good life there," he said.

  Anne-Marie smiled brilliantly. "And this day, too, is good."

  Retief smiled back. "Yes," he said. "This day is good."

  "It'll be a durn sight better when I got my feet up to that big fire you was talking about, Annie," Chip said.

  They climbed on, crossed a shoulder of broken rock, reached the final slope. Above, the lodge sprawled, a long low structure of heavy logs, outlined against the deep-blue twilight sky. Smoke billowed from stone chimneys at either end, and yellow light gleamed from the narrow windows, reflected on the snow. Men and women stood in groups of three or four, skis over their shoulders. Their voices and laughter rang in the icy air.

  Anne-Marie whistled shrilly. Someone waved.

  "Come," she said. "Meet all my friends."

  A man separated himself from the group, walked down the slope to meet them.

  "Anne-Marie," he called. "Welcome. It was a long day without you." He came up to them, hugged Anne-Marie, smiled at Retief.

  "Welcome," he said. "Come inside and be warm."

  They crossed the trampled snow to the lodge and pushed through a heavy door into a vast low-beamed hall, crowded with people, talking, singing, some sitting at long plank tables, others ringed around an eight-foot fireplace at the far side of the room. Anne-Marie led the way to a bench near the fire. She made introductions and found a stool to prop Chip's feet near the blaze.

  Chip looked around.

  "I never seen so many perty gals before," he said delightedly.

  "Poor Chip," one girl said. "His feet are cold." She knelt to pull off his boots. "Let me rub them," she said.

  A brunette with blue eyes raked a chestnut from the fire, cracked it, and offered it to Retief. A tall man with arms like oak roots passed heavy beer tankards to the two guests.

  "Tell us about the places you've seen," someone called. Chip emerged from a long pull at the mug, heaving a sigh.

  "Well," he said. "I tell you I been in some places…"

  Music started up, rising above the clamor.

  "Come, Retief," Anne-Marie said. "Dance with me."

  Retief looked at her. "My thought exactly," he said.

  Chip put down his mug and sighed. "Derned if I ever felt right at home so quick before," he said. "Just seems like these folks know all about me." He scratched behind his right ear. "Annie must o' called 'em up and told 'em our names an' all." He lowered his voice.

  "They's some kind o' trouble in the air, though. Some o' the remarks they passed sounds like they're lookin' to have some trouble with the Sweaties. Don't seen to worry 'em none, though."

  "Chip," Retief said, "how much do these people know about the Soetti?"

  "Dunno," Chip said. "We useta touch down here, regler. But I always jist set in my galley and worked on ship models or somethin'. I hear the Sweaties been nosin' around here some, though."

  Two girls came up to Chip. "Hey, I gotta go now, mister," he said. "These gals got a idea I oughta take a hand in the kitchen."

  "Smart girls," Retief said. He turned as Anne-Marie came up.

  "Bo Bergman and Tove are not back yet," she said. "They stayed to ski after moonrise."

  "That moon is something," Retief said. "Almost like daylight."

  "They will come soon, now. Shall we go out to see the moonlight on the snow?"

  Outside, long black shadows fell like ink on silver. The top of the cloud layer below glared white under the immense moon.

  "Our sister world, Gota," Anne-Marie said. "Nearly as big as Svea. I would like to visit it someday, although they say it's all stone and ice."

  "Anne-Marie," Retief said, "how many people live on Jorgensen's Worlds?"

  "About fifteen million, most of us here on Svea. There are mining camps and ice-fisheries on Gota. No one lives on Vasa and Skone, but there are always a few hunters there."

  "Have you ever fought a war?"

  Anne-Marie turned to look at Retief.

  "You are afraid for us, Retief," she said. "The Soetti will attack our worlds, and we will fight them. We have fought before. These planets were not friendly ones."

  "I thought the Soetti attack would be a surprise to you," Retief said. "Have you made any preparation for it?"

  "We have ten thousand merchant ships. When the enemy comes, we will meet them."

  Retief frowned. "Are there any guns on this planet? Any missiles?"

  Anne-Marie shook her head. "Bo Bergman and Tove have a plan of deployment-"

  "Deployment, hell! Against a modern assault force you need modern armament."

  "Look!" Anne-Marie touched Relief's arm. "They're coming now."

  Two tall grizzled men came up the slope, skis over their shoulders. Anne-Marie went forward to meet them, Retief at her side.

  The two came up, embraced the girl, shook hands with Retief, put down their skis.

  "Welcome to Svea," Tove said. "Let's find a warm corner wher
e we can talk."

  * * *

  Retief shook his head, smiling, as a tall girl with coppery hair offered a vast slab of venison.

  "I've caught up," he said, "for every hungry day I ever lived."

  Bo Bergman poured Retief's beer mug full.

  "Our captains are the best in space," he said. "Our population is concentrated in half a hundred small cities all across the planet. We know where the Soetti must strike us. We will ram their major vessels with unmanned ships. On the ground, we will hunt them down with small-arms."

  "An assembly line turning out penetration missiles would have been more to the point."

  "Yes," Bo Bergman said. "If we had known."

  "How long have you known the Soetti were planning to hit you?"

  Tove raised his eyebrows.

  "Since this afternoon," he said.

  "How did you find out about it? That information is supposed in some quarters to be a well-guarded secret."

  "Secret?" Tove said.

  Chip pulled at Retief's arm.

  "Mister," he said in Retief's ear. "Come here a minute."

  Retief looked at Anne-Marie, across at Tove and Bo Bergman. He rubbed the side of his face with his hand.

  "Excuse me," he said. He followed Chip to one side of the room.

  "Listen!" Chip said. "Maybe I'm goin' bats, but I'll swear there's somethin' funny here. I'm back there mixin' a sauce knowed only to me and the devil and I be dog if them gals don't pass me ever dang spice I need, without me sayin' a word. Come to put my souffle in the oven-she's already set, right on the button at 350. An'just now I'm settin' lookin' at one of 'em bendin' over a tub o' apples-snazzy little brunette name of Leila-derned if she don't turn around and say-" Chip gulped. "Never mind. Point is…" His voice nearly faltered. "It's almost like these folks was readin' my mind!"

  Retief patted Chip on the shoulder.

  "Don't worry about your sanity, old timer," he said. "That's exactly what they're doing."

  6