An image of Xin’s face popped into my mind. I hoped especially they loved.
Session Sixty-Three — Electric Slide
Humanity’s home planet had been divided into large chunks. A nimbus hung around the shards, looking like a milky paste with wicked storms crackling along it. Space lightning involved huge bolts that might be larger than the moon. Science wasn’t my strong point, but our future looked terrifying.
Treasure guided our semi-ragged ship closer. I saw the golden [Mechanoid] sigh heavily. Jeeves also looked worried. Eggman was laughing with his huge mouth. A brief glance at Dusk showed his head tilting while he stared at the large human. Even without a speech bubble, I could tell the [Messenger’s Pet] wanted to stab him in the face. That might be me projecting.
“Can we get in there?” I asked the crew behind me.
“Not easily,” Treasure said. “These energy readings imply we’ll be torn apart and arrive greatly damaged at best.”
“Bah. Decide. I’ll be back in a few minutes. Hehehe. I’ve got to drop some doom in the toilet!” Eggman vanished in a whoosh of light.
Treasure didn’t even bat an eye. The AIs clearly had a huge blind spot where players were concerned.
“Can I go alone?” I asked.
If we swung it just right, our [Wayfarer’s Hope] could probably sling-shot me in between the clouds. Landing would be extremely dangerous. Maybe an army of Dusks under me might help. Or I could borrow mass from something and shed it. Voices above, [Blink] would have been so useful.
“You’ll die,” Jeeves said. “And I wish you would stop trying to do this alone. Part of my mission is to assist you, Unit Hermes, no matter what happens.”
Jeeves and Treasure had gotten me this far. Without the AIs, I would never have been this successful. Maybe my game experience would have involved starting on the place Treasure mentioned—The Shores of Ohm, where all the baby silicone-and-metal-filled [Mechanoid]s crawled out to start their journey to the stars.
“I think you should take Treasure and run. Don’t look back,” I said.
“We won’t,” the rusty gold AI said. Its face showed stern disapproval for even suggesting they leave.
My mind calculated the odds of making it back to [Mechanoid] territory from here. We were in [The Old Earth Solar System], which felt like a restricted zone. Having a key to the gate was either Advance Online’s way of limiting who went there or making sure people were strong enough to go poking around. It might also just be a matter of getting a lucky drop from a space pigeon or some other nonsensical creature.
“You don’t even know if you can come back like other players or Mechanoids.” I lowered my head to look directly at Jeeves. This was driving me crazy.
“I’ll take the risk,” Jeeves said.
Treasure had a much different reaction. “What? What does that mean?”
“Nothing I wish to share,” it responded. Both the nanny and butler voices turned stubborn.
“It means that if Jeeves dies down there, it might be impossible for you to rejoin on the Shores of Ohm.” I threw the name out there since it sounded extremely important, given how Treasure had used it earlier. She’d had the same reverence people used when talking about meeting loved ones in the afterlife.
There was a pause while the shorter female [Mechanoid] looked at us. First at me, then back at Jeeves. She pressed buttons on her scanner and stared at readings then smiled. She nodded rapidly. “No. I am confident that our data can be recovered, same as any other core. You will return too, Hermes, regardless of our successes. We should not be afraid to do our best.”
I looked down for a moment and tried not to dwell on the situation. There was a way through. If all else failed, I would use it to at least secure Jeeves’s future. It would be a matter of trying my hardest to not need such a way through.
“I am with you, regardless of what may come,” Jeeves once again affirmed.
“I too am willing to see this to the end,” Treasure said.
I kept our ship paused outside the Earth’s atmosphere. Eggman gasped upon reentry. His character made a loud farting sound that thankfully [Mechanoid]s didn’t process correctly. Skipping that purchase on the [Wayfarer Seven] had been a good decision. At least, I was sure it had been skipped. Our cabin felt a bit stuffier, and Dusk was squawking. One of the small raptor’s four arms kept trying to claw the top of Eggman’s head.
“We ready?” Eggman asked.
“No, I’m trying to convince them to leave,” I told the other player. He might understand trying to keep NPCs safe. Maybe he wouldn’t.
“Bah. Do or do not, there is no die!” Eggman scratched a large double chin, then shook his head. “Maybe I’ve got that wrong. Hehehe.”
“We’re going,” Treasure said.
“You heard ‘em. Pedal to the metal! Go, go, go! All units prepare for battle!” Eggman bounced in our ship. The motion did more to jar him around than it did our ship.
“Ham.” Auntie Backstab’s face appeared on our ship’s screen.
My head tried to wrap around the concept that the half-[Leviathan] monstrosity had once again shown up. How had she made it through the Jump Gate?
Treasure gasped. “Is that…? No, pardon my inquiry. One moment while I bring up our scanners.”
Beeps sounded. The indicator for our shield dipped and other lights came on. I turned to look over Jeeves’s display. A trail of defeated monsters and a few dead players littered our path back to the Jump Gate. All of them had been taken down by Commander Queenshand and crew. Soon my friend had the [Stabinator] up on the display.
“Ham.” Auntie Backstab’s jaw looked broken. The once-imposing armor was in shreds. Green mud melted together with space eel features.
The [Stabinator] fared even worse. Spikes were hanging off the former ball in odd shapes. It looked as if someone had pounded into the sides and dented it.
“How are you still alive, Captain Backstab?” I muttered to her image.
Boss Re-Encountered!
Name: Auntie Backstab
Health Pool: Still a lot
Damage Output: Questionable
Happiness Level: -45
“Ham. Will eat. Ship destroyed,” Captain Backstab mumbled. Anger must be driving her to catch up with us.
The game scripting may be forcing Auntie Backstab to chase us so we wouldn’t stop for too long. It was extremely aggravating, because she could probably still out-damage us altogether.
Did we turn around and risk fighting head-on, or follow the prompt to dive forward? A few reckless options were available. First, the other [Mechanoid]s needed to go home and be freed from my madness. I knew if I thought about it in depth, this whole idea was ridiculous. The craziest part wasn’t even chasing a digital woman; it was me pulling along extra people to try to reach an electronic copy of my dead fiancée.
“Treasure, take Jeeves and go as far as you can.” I felt at once certain about our situation. Those two were going to die like Ruby and Aqua had. I was being chased by a giant space ogre who healed by eating metal. This was clearly our nemesis, and she wouldn’t stop unless killed.
“Unit Hermes, we’re not leaving you,” they said in unison.
I blinked and felt momentarily proud for Jeeves managing to fit in, even a little.
Our vessel kicked into gear. Out of reflex, I sat down quickly, then buckled myself into the harness. One of the other two was piloting us now. I cringed and wondered if a better speaker might have been able to solve this problem. Could a greater man have found a way to talk to Commander Queenshand ahead of time? A skilled warrior might have dominated Auntie Backstab. Perhaps an expert tactician might have led our [Mechanoid] army toward domination.
“We’re going in,” Treasure said while continuously pressing buttons. My display abruptly shut off. “You can’t do this without our help, and the visual feed you old soul cores rely on is only serving as a distraction.”
“But you’ll die.” I turned the seat toward them a
nd tried to plead my case.
“All forces full speed ahead! Go team robot!” said the bouncing fat man. His bulk occupied a lot of space in our ship.
Dusk scowled at him from a perch above.
“At least let me see something.” I couldn’t sit here and not know what we were getting into. Or what we were flying toward. All those lightning bolts had rippled across the broken parts of our world.
I needed to watch, one way or the other. Being a coward in these situations was no longer an option. My biggest change in the last few months wasn’t a bunch of character points or skills. It was learning to confront the things that scared me with both eyes open. I may not be calm or cold-blooded, but I would not run. I would live and hope for a better tomorrow.
Treasure waved in my direction and a small window appeared. It showed us cruising at high speeds toward the planet below. Our vessel quivered as it entered a different type of space. Was that water? It looked like a bunch of frozen droplets scattered about. Was that what remained of the earth’s once-vast oceans? I didn’t understand how that was possible.
Lightning happened when positive and negative ions built. Bolts poured out from the cloud’s center and flew rapidly to the various pieces of old Earth. They whooshed through the water droplets and set them dancing as if they could boil in a vacuum.
All those lightning strikes came from the center of what used to be Earth. Sadly, that was the exact location that Treasure was piloting us toward. Our screens showed some interference as all the systems started losing functionality.
“Ham,” Auntie Backstab groaned. Her ship had apparently closed a good deal of the gap between us. If our vessel had been focused on sensors instead of maintaining shields and repairing, then maybe we would have noticed sooner.
Treasure gasped in annoyance. A tiny, mostly metal hand slammed onto her desk. “I’m losing readings. One moment, I need to input the last-noted course corrections. At this rate, we will break through and hold orbit on the clear side.”
“The systems are going out. We’re nearly dead weight,” Jeeves said while shaking its head.
“No, we’re doomed! But the other players are still online, I know it! If those twerps made it through, so can we!” Eggman shouted happily, despite the bolts streaming around nearby.
What exactly were they conducting from? It was as if this place still had some semblance of gravity but no longer had actual mass. Our war with the AIs must have truly turned this place into a bizarre madhouse planet. Or it could be the game just messing with settings for impact.
I didn’t have control of our destination. That was perhaps for the best—my ability to pilot felt like a drunk person driving sometimes. The prior fuel usage and constant course corrections were all my fault.
“Brace yourselves!” Treasure shouted.
Our ship rocked as another trail of lightning went by. The interface I was watching faded out as electricity rippled through. That bolt must have been close enough for some of the branches of energy to reach across to us. I frantically tried to figure out if we were full of negative or positive ions, but nothing came to mind. We had to be a bit of both with energy [Core]s, but portions of Advance Online didn’t follow outright science.
I mean, I was a metal creature who stole minerals and elements from a ship to upgrade myself. We traveled through space into mass teleportation relays and came out the other side. Jeeves and I had fought a space eel. Our ship drove like a car without Auto-NAV. Clearly the AIs that managed this place thought science only existed when it didn’t interfere with the game elements.
Eggman screamed as the rest of us watched our [Core] energy bars fluctuate rapidly. He huffed and pressed a button at his waist. Red blots appeared along one meaty arm, but after the ability activated, they slowly vanished. He must have triggered a player potion or nano-machines, whatever future tech excuse allowed for health recovery.
Seconds later our ship was bumped, and this time, the collision was unkind.
“She’s on us again,” Treasure said after trying repeatedly to access her console. It flickered in and out.
“Don’t we have shields?” I asked.
“Not with all this ambient energy,” she responded.
“Your pal’s right. We’re doomed!” Eggman put a fist in the air and jumped up and down. His form shimmered a bit with a green glow.
“Fine! I’m not driving, and I’m tired of her following us!” If they didn’t need me to drive this hunk of metal, I needed to try another means of keeping us safe. I unbuckled and pushed myself past Eggman’s bulky form.
He rolled into a wall and almost crushed Dusk and Jeeves. “What are you doing, Hermes?”
We were like two large pigs trying to pass each other in a narrow hallway.
“Being stupid, but we’re going down one way or another, and I’m not letting her follow us anymore.” My brain was already trying to plot out the calculations.
At the right angle, there would be enough force for me to leap between ships. From there I could bring the [Stabinator] down. My abilities could easily take out an enemy’s vessel, especially since our shields were constantly being drained by the lightning.
We had a small ladder in the back. I pushed up through the hatch. [Anchor] activated swiftly, and my hand glommed onto the hull. Eggman screamed at me as oxygen whooshed out. Dusk chirped and clanked behind me as he caught up. Less than a minute later, we were outside and had sealed the hatch behind us.
Jeeves voice came over the intercom. “Are you sure this is wise?”
“No! Stay close!” I wondered briefly what my sister would think about these next few actions.
I readied myself to jump. Space combat without the [Blink] skill felt exhilarating. If it hadn’t been for Xin, Jeeves, and Treasure behind me, I would have truly enjoyed this.
“That won’t be a problem, Hermes. At this point, gravity and propulsion will do the work for us. You have less than five minutes before we breach the clear zone,” Treasure said over the system.
“Okay! Are we going that slow?” I was an idiot with a metal body who couldn’t permanently die in this game. Treasure and Jeeves might be able to resurrect me on the other side of this, but this recurring nightmare of a boss had to go.
“Through this? We must not rush. It takes time to correct course and avoid the worst strikes,” Treasure said.
“Ham?” our mostly broken enemy questioned.
I was unsure what game mechanic justified her ability to break across our lines. Both legs bunched, [Anchor] deactivated, and I leapt through space toward a looming [Stabinator]. The vessel’s size was downright imposing but impossible to miss. My body slammed into the accelerating vehicle. I had no idea how fast we were going or how much gravity was impacting us. I did know the action hurt as inertia sent me rolling around the hull.
Seriously Questionable Choices
Total health loss: 85%
I landed on a spike’s rounded edge, my back bent painfully over the damaged weapon. [Anchor] activated again as I slammed both hands down to try to get purchase before I slipped away into the great unknown. A small chirp of noise came in right behind me. I looked up and saw Dusk, angry and upset at our slippery situation.
He had mastered traveling on the [Wayfarer Seven]’s hull, but Auntie Backstab’s ship wasn’t nearly as easy to get around on for either of us. I wasn’t sure where to start with my demolition plan. [Anchor] fluctuated wildly with each minor lightning strike passing by. Dusk seemed to be timing his hops between spikes, so I followed him, only stopping when he did.
Our path aimed for a hatch near the underside that was probably used by normal people to board the ship. We passed through huge dents, broken spike pits, and portions of the ship that were covered in tar.
“Treasure! Jeeves!” I shouted.
They didn’t respond. Our connection was full static. Whatever space nonsense we were flying through felt like hail and ruined my senses. Only Dusk’s bouts of chirping noise kept me together
long enough to get to the hatch and let myself inside Auntie Backstab’s giant ship.
Inside looked nothing like the [Wayfarer’s Hope]. Our ship was rather streamlined, with a few seats and displays for all the [Mechanoid]s to operate at. This vessel was like a cage where the wall had been pounded back repeatedly in spots. Layers of dents existed inside, and a few actual chunks of the wall were missing.
I didn’t have time to sneak. Crawling across the ship’s hull had taken at least a minute. We were still moving forward rapidly. Inertia kept me balanced, but this ship had no gravity. If Auntie Backstab noticed me, then this mission would turn sour. I felt unsure about breaking into this broken captain’s personal vessel. She clearly had anger issues and damned impressive willpower. Maybe she would have been perfectly fine if it weren’t for Commander Queenshand’s stance on the [Mistborn].
Thinking like that made this a million times worse. My hand went up toward one of the less damaged-looking panels. My eyes closed, and I breathed slowly. [Material Conversion] went into action. A microwave ding and whir of noise accompanied the increase in mass. Fifteen seconds later, I was near the halfway point and had managed to suck up an entire panel of wires.
“Ham? Is that Ham?” Auntie Backstab’s giant body, which sat roughly twenty feet away, gradually started to turn.
“No,” I whispered.
Dusk turned toward her and chirped. I wished that Auntie Backstab had been human and stopping her vessel from following us would have meant simply venting us into space. Instead, she was comprised of two races that didn’t care about oxygen that much.
Not everything in her ship was made of metal. There appeared to be a sort of rubbery plastic mixed in with the walls. It might have been the only thing preventing her constant abuse of the ship’s inside from leaving lasting damage. My efforts neared the three-quarters mark of maximum mass before a lightning bolt disrupted everything. My enlarged body briefly stuttered as the extra mass around me could no longer be supported.
It fell to the ground in clumps of metal clay. Warm heat spread through my feet and made me regret drinking too much water before getting into the ARC.
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