Allie's War Early Years

by JC Andrijeski

  It didn't help.

  Finally, I shook my head.

  "What?" I said blankly, looking up at him. "What are you talking about, Simon?"

  He sighed a little, again running his fingers through his hair.

  "Allie," he said tiredly. "You already heard part of this."

  "Heard part of what?"

  "What they told you. It was true." He paused, studying my face. After his eyes focused on mine for a few seconds, he frowned again. “...Not the part about being a Snake diety. The rest of it. About you being an intermediary. About you being a seer."

  "Oh," I said, nodding. "So only that part, huh?" I smiled wanly. "Not the part where I have to die by fire to cleanse the soul of humanity and prevent the end of the world?"

  I'd meant it as a kind of off-color joke, but suddenly, I felt my adrenaline spike again.

  "Are you talking about that sacrifice thing?" I said. "You're not, are you?"

  "No," he said, impatient. "I mean about your race. About what you are."

  I just stared at him.

  After another pause where he just looked at me, he sighed again.

  "I still don't understand how those Mythers found you," he said. "I was told that identifying your race by genetic markers alone would be nearly impossible. The real risk was supposed to be when you started to display secondaries spontaneously... on your own, I mean." At my blank look, he shrugged. "So far, there have only been little things. Your light is being monitored constantly by a select group in the Seven. They've been shielding you since they found you, which wasn't long after you were adopted by your human parents."

  I blinked maybe, trying to wrap my mind around his words. But otherwise, I think I was still pretty much gaping at him.

  I didn't believe a word of it, of course.

  "What?" I said again.

  I really was tired.

  "So what are you saying?" I tried again. "You're saying I'm a seer?"

  "Yes," he said simply.

  "A secret seer? That no one knows about?"

  "Yes."

  "Some unusual kind of seer?" I clarified. "Different from you? Different from that woman you uncollared?"

  "Yes," he said, nodding. His voice held some relief, as if this conversation were going better than he'd thought it would. “...Officially, your race doesn't exist to the human authorities. Which frankly makes a lot of things easier. They don't know how to scan for your blood type, or any of your other biological markers. You also appear to age more like a human than the way seers like me normally do...” He indicated up and down my body. “...It's the only reason we've been able to hide you in the human population for as long as we have. That would have been impossible if you were a normal seer. They would've known what you were when you didn't age with the rest of your peers... you'd have been quarantined at once, no matter what the blood tests said."

  I just stared at him. I might have blinked again maybe.

  "Sarhaciennes are the breed of seer humans know about," he clarified. "Like me. And the woman you saw. Like most seers."

  "You're saying there's another species of seer on Earth?" I said. "Not just the seers we know about? One that SCARB hasn't discovered yet? Or any of the other human powers?"

  I continued to stare at him, now openly not believing him.

  He didn't seem to notice.

  "Yes," he said. Pausing, he amended his words. “...Well, no. Not exactly. Even to us Sarks, the first race is officially extinct. But some of them come back...”

  "Come back?" I folded my arms tighter. "Come back from where?"

  "Allie," he said tiredly. He rubbed his face with a hand, then ran those same fingers through his black hair again. "I'm tired, too." He met my gaze. "And we really don't have the time to get into all of that now. Really, it's better if you don't know too much anyway. I shouldn't be telling you anything... but I didn't want to scare you."

  I felt my jaw tighten. Replaying his words, I glanced towards the door. I barely looked, but I saw him notice.

  "You're not doing a great job then," I said. "Explaining. Or not scaring me."

  "Allie." He met my gaze again. "I'm not going to hurt you. I promise you I'm not."

  "Then why are you telling me any of this?"

  He gave me a vague shrug, but I saw a touch of nervousness reach his eyes.

  "I don't know," he admitted. "Because I wanted to, I guess."

  "So what am I supposed to do with this information, exactly?" I said. "Do I get to learn the seer secret handshake now?" I folded my arms tighter, fighting to keep my voice even. "Or is now when you start explaining how I need to join this organization you're in, to help free 'our' people? Start by making pipe bombs in the basement with you and your pals... ?"

  He shook his head. "Neither," he said.

  "Then what?"

  He sighed again, clicking a little. "I need to correct my mistake. In order to do that, I'm going to need to make you forget a large portion of what happened today. Everything that occurred between you and those Mythers...” He hesitated, studying my face. “...And with me."

  "Forget?" I was looking at him numbly again. "Forget, how?"

  "It's something we seers can do." Still studying my face, he leaned deeper into the couch, resting his arm on the back of it. His eyes never left mine, but I saw the faint thread of nerves there again. “...It's not easy. But I think the incident was isolated enough that I can do it. You don't need to forget forever, after all. Just for the next few decades."

  "The next few decades," I repeated. "I need to forget something 'for a few decades'?"

  "Yes."

  "You're going to mess with my mind?"

  He shook his head, making that soft clicking noise. "It won't harm you, Allie. I already told you I wouldn't hurt you. I meant it."

  "Why can't I just keep it a secret?" I said. "Don't you trust me?"

  "No," he said frankly. "I don't. You'd tell Jon... or Cass."

  "And they'd think I was making it up anyway," I said, frowning. "Look, you must know that even I don't believe you. I've had my blood checked about a hundred times... if not more."

  "Yeah." He sighed. "That part's a little complicated...”

  "Then don't explain it, please," I said, waving a hand. "I don't want to know. The point is, you don't need to 'erase' me. No one would believe me, even if I did tell. And I already planned to softcoat the story of those whackos when I talked to Jon and Cass... I have my own reasons for keeping quiet about this."

  The man calling himself Simon just looked at me for a minute.

  Then he sighed, making that clicking noise with his tongue.

  "You're missing the point," he said. "Anyone could read you for it, Allie."

  "You mean any seer."

  "Yes," he said.

  "What are the chances I'm going to run into a seer who cares enough to look?"

  His eyes narrowed. For a moment he looked almost angry, then he shook his head, as if to clear it. His voice came out calm once more.

  "I have to erase you, Allie," he said simply. "It's not up for debate. And it's not meant as a punishment... it's for your protection."

  "But why?"

  "The Council is right in a way," he said, going on as if I hadn't spoken. “...Denying me direct access to you, I mean. They're trying to keep you safe. Not only from yourself... from other seers, from the human authorities, from anyone who might try to hurt you or sell you." At the blank look in my eyes, he shrugged again. "Your absolute, best protection is anonymity, Allie. Your life in San Francisco has made that easier... you generally don't do too much to call attention to yourself, which I appreciate, believe me."

  I felt my jaw tighten. "Yeah, I've already heard enough for one night about just how 'insignificant' my life is, thanks very much. Apparently my lack of direction is what almost got me killed by those fruitcakes...”

  He smiled, but the look in his eyes was almost grim.

  “...Allie," he said, his voice gentle. "You should enjoy this ti
me. Your life is going to get a lot more complicated once you're awakened for real. The longer you can stay anonymous, the longer things will stay relatively easy for you...”

  "Easy?" I snorted, folding my arms. "You call tonight easy?"

  He shrugged. "Tonight was an anomoly. Normally, your life is pretty uncomplicated."

  "Pointless, you mean," I snorted.

  I looked at him though, thinking about his words, in spite of myself. I still didn't believe him, but my brain was finally catching up with everything he was saying.

  "So you weren't just going along with that guy," I said. "You really do think you're some kind of guard over me."

  "I am," he said. "I was assigned by the Council."

  "I see," I said, still going along with it. "So how long have you been doing this guard job, if you don't mind my asking?"

  He frowned as if thinking, then looked back at me. "Nineteen years."

  "Nineteen years," I repeated numbly.

  "Yes."

  "And I never saw you? Not once in all that time?"

  "You did once." He looked faintly embarrassed again. “...I didn't tell the Council about that, either. We spoke once when you were about nine years old. But it's a lot easier to submerge those kinds of memories when you're a child... and it's less likely you'd make the connection with someone you'd see looking the same as an adult, even if you did remember."

  I ran this through my mind again, blinked.

  "You're saying you look the same now as you did when I was nine?" I said.

  "We age differently than you," he reminded me. “...I know I look fairly human. That's partly why they gave me the job, I can pass. But I'm not, Allie. I'm a seer."

  "And I'm a seer, too," I repeated. "A non-Sark seer who is officially extinct."

  His eyes narrowed, looking from one of mine to the other.

  "Yes," he said warily. "Approximately, yes... that is right."

  "And you're going to erase my memory?"

  "Yes," he said.

  "All of it?"

  "No." He gave me a strange look, clicking softly. "No, Alyson. Why would I do that? That's not even possible...” He continued to look at me with that puzzled expression. “...No, only your memory of the last 24 hours. I'll probably have to erase most of tonight, since you said the leader of the Mythers approached you in the bar...”

  "Ponytail guy."

  Simon nodded, conceding this with a gesture.

  “...Ponytail guy. It also means," he added. "That I'll need to erase your boyfriend's memory of me. And your brother's... and your friend, Cass' memories as well. I'll need their memories to synch up with yours in the park... and if something happens that forces me to get close to you in the flesh again, it will complicate things considerably if they recognize me...”

  "You're going to erase Jon and Cass, too?" I said, bewildered. "How?"

  He waved off my concern. "It won't be difficult. Yours will be much harder. You're a seer... even if untrained... and you have significantly more memories to suppress."

  "What did you mean, if you have to get close to me in the flesh again?" I said then, catching up with the rest of what he'd said. "As opposed to what? When do you see me not in the flesh? Aren't you supposed to be my bodyguard?"

  "Most of the time, I can do that perfectly well from the Barrier," Simon said. Clasping his hands between his knees, he looked up at me, his eyes reflecting firelight. "It means I can watch you from a distance," he explained. “...Using my seer abilities. I can do that from almost anywhere, Allie. I usually try to keep my distance in the physical. Mainly to avoid drawing attention to you... but also to avoid interfering with your life. But if there's a direct threat, something I can't handle from the Barrier, then I have to go in person...”

  "Like tonight."

  "Like tonight." He gave me another shrug. "Generally, anything involving seers or someone being protected by seers would force me to come in person...”

  "So Ponytail and his pals... ?"

  Simon shook his head, clicking a little with a sigh.

  "I don't know," he admitted. "I was almost too late. All of the actual followers I could see were human...” He gave me another apologetic look. “...I waited too long because of that. I thought I could push them, from the Barrier...”

  Seeing something in my face, he trailed, shrugging again with a wave of his hand.

  “...It doesn't matter now," he finished, his voice still apologetic. "But I'll be more careful in the future. I promise I will, Allie."

  "In the future... when you're guarding me again."

  "Yes."

  "But I'll have no idea you're doing it."

  "Yes."

  “...And if I see you, I won't remember you," I clarified. “...And I won't remember that those freaks tried to burn me alive... or that I'm this weird kind of extinct seer."

  Thinking briefly, Simon nodded again.

  "Yes," he said.

  I stared into the fire for another few seconds, nodding, although to what or to whom, I have no idea. I was so exhausted at that point, I didn't have the energy to try and argue with him. I still couldn't decide if I was in danger. He didn't seem to want to hurt me.

  "I won't hurt you, Allie," he said firmly.

  "You promise?" I said, turning.

  "I promise," he said. "I'll get you back to your hotel room without a scratch...” Looking at me then, and at the state of me most likely, he amended. “...No new ones, anyway."

  "And you won't hurt Jaden? Or Jon? Or Cass?"

  He gave me another bewildered look.

  "Of course not. No."

  "Will I remember that Jaden kissed that girl?"

  At that, Simon hesitated. Clasping his hands together between his knees, he shrugged, his face and voice neutral.

  "It's not always easy to be that precise," he said carefully. "You saw the man who abducted you right before you saw your boyfriend with that... girl. From what I understand, you saw me directly after. It would be extremely difficult for me to erase your memory of the Myther and of me and not erase what you saw your boyfriend do. I doubt I could do it even with the Council's help... and I'd really rather not involve them, Allie."

  "So, no, then," I said.

  "No," he said. "I can try, but if there is any doubt at all, I will err on the side of erasing the memory of me and the Myther. I'm sorry, Allie."

  "Will he remember?"

  "Jaden?" Simon gave me another strange look. "He won't remember you kissing me," he said. "Would you rather if he didn't remember kissing that girl, either?"

  I hesitated, but only for an instant.

  Then I shook my head, folding my arms tighter over my chest.

  "No," I said, my voice subdued. "Don't take more of him than you have to."

  He continued to look at me, his expression puzzled. Finally, he nodded.

  "Okay," he said.

  Without thinking, I turned towards him once more.

  "Why did you do that, anyway?" I said, blunt. "Let me kiss you?" I felt my face flush even as I said it, but I kept my eyes on his. “...Is that a part of your official duty? Helping me get revenge against straying boyfriends?"

  His skin darkened a little. Without looking up, he shrugged.

  I thought he would say more. But he didn't.

  "So what now?" I said, sighing. I didn't believe him, even then, but I wanted this to be over. I wanted nothing more than to go to bed. “...What do we do now, Simon?"

  "You don't do anything," he said. "I'll start as soon as you're ready."

  "I'll never be ready for whatever it is you're talking about," I said, exasperated. "I don't believe you. You know that, right?"

  He raised an eyebrow. "Then why haven't you tried to leave?"

  "Why?" I said blankly.

  For a couple of ticking seconds, the question stumped me. Why hadn't I tried to leave? Looking at him, I realized I knew the answer.

  “...Because I'm pretty sure you were telling the truth when you said you didn't w
ant to hurt me," I said finally, rubbing my sore arm. "And I don't know why you'd save my life just to give me some spiel in a hotel room and then off me yourself...”

  "So what do you think is going to happen right now, Allie?" he said, curious.

  "I think I'm going to wake up in my room tomorrow morning, and I'm going think this is the weirdest damned night I've had in my life... and that you were a very cute nutcase who happened to save my life."

  He nodded slowly, as if thinking about this.

  Then he seemed to make up his mind.

  "You believe me that I won't hurt you?" he said.

  "Yes," I said. "Maybe that makes me an idiot, but...”

  "No." He shook his head, meeting my gaze. "No, Allie. It means that maybe your abilities aren't as dormant as the Council thinks." He looked at me thoughtfully for a moment. "Why did you do it?"

  "Do what?"

  "Kiss me."

  I felt my skin warm, even before I looked over at him. "You know why. I was pissed off. I wanted to hurt Jaden...”

  But he was shaking his head, clicking softly.

  "You didn't have to kiss me like that to make your point." He paused, his eyes on mine deliberately. "You liked it. As much as I did."

  I felt my jaw harden a little.

  But I couldn't exactly argue with him. I'd opened the door on the whole topic anyway, asking him about the kiss, telling him I thought he was cute... if crazy. I remembered what I'd read about seers being oversexed, about them having some kind of biologically-driven, impulse-control issues. It was why so many of them ended up as prostitutes... apparently the majority of them had the libido of your average human nymphomaniac.

  I glanced at the door to the bedroom we'd passed, almost without realizing I'd done it.

  When I looked back, I saw him raise an eyebrow at me, smiling faintly.

  "You've got to be kidding," I said. "Is that what this is about?"

  "What?" he said.

  "Sex," I said. "Did you bring me back here to get laid?"

  He stared at me blankly for a minute.

  Then his eyes shifted to the bedroom, too. He looked back at me a second later, and that time, I saw his gaze focus on my mouth, but only briefly. He was shaking his head then, clicking softly again as he looked back at the fire. Even so, I saw his jaw harden.