Lady Parts

by Loren

  Gene rolled her eyes and sighed. “She is not. I can’t believe you. Why would you get her started?” she said frowning at Ginger. “Don’t start. Ok?” she said to Charlotte.

  “It’s already done,” Sheila said, resigning herself to watch from the outskirts because she never got in the middle of things.

  “So, you’ve got a man?” Charlotte said, getting right to the heart of the matter.

  “No,” Gene said, knowing she couldn’t get out of it. “I met a man.”

  “Ooh, sounds promising,” Ginger said. “Tell us about him.”

  “He’s ...” She struggled to find words for it. Hot. Unrelenting. Her next door neighbor. “Nice.”

  “You going to add more words onto that descriptor or we supposed to just use our imagination?” Charlotte said, waving her hands in the air for an elaboration.

  “He’s ... good looking?”

  “You telling us or asking?” Ginger said snickering.

  Gene sighed and didn’t say a word as the waiter came with their food. She kept quiet hoping they would move on as they ate. But no luck, because Charlotte took one bite of her pancakes and said, “Don’t think we forgot about you.”

  “Ugh. Will you just leave it? It’s not that big of a deal. I don’t need a man. I’m not looking for one either. I just want to get my business in the black and keep my head on straight,” Gene said, frowning at the steaming plate of food, mad she couldn’t take an immediate bite.

  “What does he do?” Sheila said as if that would be helpful.

  “I don’t really know,” Gene said slowly, like peeling the band-aid off slowly wouldn’t sound as bad as standing firm in her ignorance. “I think he’s some sort of handy man.”

  “Well, what do you know? Men like to talk about themselves, so what did he say?” Charlotte said.

  “Not much,” Gene said honestly. Every time they hung out, he let her talk. He seemed to want to know everything about her even though she resisted. Despite her best efforts, it seemed that he was winning.

  Charlotte looked on the verge of snapping. She wanted details, and Gene wasn’t giving her any.

  “Ok. Where did you meet?” Ginger said.

  “Lady Parts,” Gene said over the bacon and cheese sandwich in her mouth.

  “Okay, that’s something we can work with. What kind of car does he drive?” Charlotte said. “And don’t get all fancy with the models because you know we won’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “A Lexus two-door,” Gene said simply instead of saying a Lexus RCF.

  “Ugh, Genie,” Charlotte said, throwing her head back dramatically. “You’d think you’d have gotten over this with a little bit of age, girl.”

  “Hey! What’s that supposed to mean? I’ve matured when it comes to men,” Gene said defensively.

  “Sure, you have. You’re still picking bad boys disguised as prep boys,” Ginger said, making it clear she agreed with Charlotte.

  “How do you know he’s a bad boy?” Sheila said, ever the voice of reason.

  “How do you know he’s a prep boy?” Ginger added.

  “We don’t, but the details don’t sound promising. Do they? Drives a fancy car. Doesn’t talk about himself. Gene doesn’t know what he does or where he’s from only that he’s pretty hot and seems to have money. I don’t like it,” Charlotte said, looking as if she smelled something foul.

  “I said I think he’s a handy man.”

  Charlotte rolled her eyes. “I don’t like it,” she reiterated.

  “You don’t like anything, Charlotte. You are the most pessimistic girl when it comes to anybody but yourself,” Ginger said before taking a huge gulp of her mimosa.

  “Excuse me?” Charlotte said, pretending she was offended.

  “We don’t believe you,” Ginger said to Charlotte, who shrugged it off. Nobody believed Charlotte was offended because she knew it was true. Charlotte knew she was the negative Nancy of the bunch. At least a tiny bit. “Gene, it’s about time you moved on,” Ginger said.

  Gene struggled to keep her face neutral. Who decided when it was time to move on? How could she move on when her ex was still holding onto half her company and barging into her life whenever he wanted making demands and trying to sink her career?

  “Yeah,” Sheila added on.

  “It’s about time you had some fun. If he’s hot, he might have a big dick. If he does, go you. I know that thing has cobwebs by now,” Ginger said, pointing at Gene’s crotch.

  Gene laughed loudly. “Shut up.” There shouldn’t be any cobwebs. She was getting work, just from a plastic toy instead. She blushed, knowing it was better to stay silent.

  “Don’t try to deny it,” Sheila said, giggling along with her.

  Gene ignored them and took another bite of her sandwich.

  “And if his dick isn’t quite what you were looking for, you still win because you went out of your comfort zone. Either way, you should be set,” Ginger said, still trying to stay on the positive side. Gene almost choked, horrified Ginger was still talking about his dick. The man oozed sex appeal, it was hard enough to look at him without touching him, she hadn’t garnered enough nerve to admit she imagined him naked.

  “Well,” Charlotte said while chasing her mimosa straw around the rim of her glass with her tongue, “when you say it like that, I think Ginger is right.” It didn’t matter who was right. It was better to be single and successful than mingling and mediocre. Gene learned the hard way you can’t have both.

  “Oh shit. Charlotte is siding with me. Now you have to do it,” Ginger said with wide eyes.

  Sheila burst into another fit of giggles and chanted, “Do it. Do it!”

  Ginger and Charlotte joined in, gaining looks from the tables around them before Gene held up her hands and yelled, “Alright! Damn! Ok!”

  “Ok, you’ll do it?” Sheila said hopefully.

  “Ok, I will think about it,” Gene said shrugging. She had already been thinking about it but they didn’t have to know that.

  Ginger sucked her teeth and Charlotte shrugged while Sheila crossed her arms in front of her chest. “I don’t like that answer,” Sheila said.

  “Well you’re going to have to accept it,” Gene said, shrugging her shoulders. “I’m not saying no, but I’m not saying yes. I’m just” Lonely. Foolish. “I don’t know.” She was feeling way too much.

  “You’re scared,” Ginger said. She wasn’t asking. She leaned over to cover Gene’s hand with her own. “It’s ok to be scared you know?”

  “I know,” Gene mumbled.

  “But you can’t let that get in the way of you doing something you want to do,” Sheila said softly.

  “I know,” Gene repeated. She did know. She had been feeling that way all along but still too scared to try. Liam didn’t seem to be letting up and it was a good thing he didn’t too because she wasn’t sure she would be strong enough to make the first move.

  “You should do it,” Charlotte said with an attitude and apparently now team Liam.

  “I said I’ll think about it,” Gene said between her teeth. She was beating herself up enough without her friends jumping on board with the peer pressure.

  “Alright. Alright,” Ginger said, raising her hands in the air. “Moving on, Sheila’s got a show coming up and since she’s too humble to brag about it. I’ll do it for her,” Ginger said, smiling at a blushing Sheila. “Her show is about to be all that and then some. I’ve been seeing news articles about it, and those critics are chomping at the bit to have a look at it. Our girl is on the up and up, trust me. I know she’s seconds from being some big superstar.” Ginger reached across to push Sheila’s shoulder since she was pink as a baby’s bottom. “I don’t know why she is acting like it’s not true. She has a gift, and I’m just happy to see everybody else finally seeing what we’ve been seeing all along.”

  “Aww,” Charlotte said, wrapping her arms around Sheila’s shoulder. “Congratulations. Babe. You deserve some recognition.”

>   Sheila shook her head, and Gene laughed. “You think you’ll have any more kids,” Gene asked Charlotte, relieving Sheila of the spotlight. Sheila smiled in gratitude and Gene nodded her head in silent acknowledgment. If there was any way to change the focus without too much hassle, all you had to do was ask Charlotte to talk about herself. Even at Gene’s expense.

  “I don’t think so. As much as I think Chris would like to, he doesn’t have to stay home and take care of them. You know what I mean?” Gene tried to see it from a realistic perspective but who complained about staying home with their child? If she had the chance she would have a child and staying at home was just a luxury that she wished to afford.

  Ginger shrugged. “I don’t know. Doesn’t sound that big of a deal to me. If you want more kids, tell him to do a better job helping out. It’s not like you can’t afford it.”

  Charlotte tipped her head back and drained her glass before sighing. “Yeah. Maybe. We’ll see. Right now, I’d just like to get Sydney to kindergarten. Would you believe those things cost like twenty thousand a year?”

  “At that price, admission better come with a college acceptance letter,” Gene said, and Sheila laughed.

  “No,” Charlotte scoffed. “It doesn’t. The best ones do guarantee a certain IQ level, but it’s still stressful.”

  “Didn’t you say Sid is two though? You’ve got a few years to relax,” Sheila said.

  “No, I don’t. Not for the really nice ones. Those have waiting lists.”

  Gene blew a raspberry. “What a load of bull. Jesus. They’re just kids. I think you can hold off on waiting for them to get some sky-high IQ and worrying about fancy schools.”

  “But that’s not how the five-year plan goes, and if I ditch the plan now, then that throws everything off. The ten-year plan won’t make any sense, and then everything will just fall apart,” Charlotte said in increasing volume and speed so that by the time she finished talking she sounded something like a raving lunatic.

  Every woman at the table paused trying to hold it in before they lost it, laughing loudly, pounding the table with their hands, and holding their stomachs until they were completely out of breath.

  “Okay so not much has changed since university,” Gene said, once she was able to catch her breath.

  “Apparently not much at all,” Sheila added.

  “Except our faces,” Ginger said, still giggling.

  “Okay, I don’t know whose face you’re talking about because I’ll call Eric right now and get his ass if these Botox shots have not been working. I’ve worked hard to keep this youthful glow,” Charlotte said so seriously that the women at the table lost it again laughing. Sometimes Charlotte seemed to live in an entirely different universe than them.

  They talked and laughed more, and by the time the plates were cleared, Gene was glad she made time to see her girlfriends. Even though it had been five years, the years felt like they just melted away. When Ginger sent the group chat a year ago demanding they have brunch Gene wasn’t sure it would come to pass. They lived too far apart to get together on the regular anymore, and with each passing year, it seemed like they got so busy with their lives they forgot each other.

  “Thanks so much for coming, guys,” Gene said after they split the check and each received their debit cards back.

  “It was nothing,” Sheila said. It was more than nothing.

  “Hell, you did me a favor,” Charlotte said, rummaging through her purse before pulling out a small package of gum. She unwrapped one quickly, sticking it in her mouth before holding it out as an offer to anyone who wanted one.

  “We have to do this again. More often. I miss you guys,” Ginger said, pushing a stick of gum into her mouth.

  “Well, I don’t know when. You seem to be busier than when you were a small-time engineer trying to get someone to notice you,” Charlotte said through the pack of gum back into her purse when Gene and Sheila shook their heads no.

  “Well I have to expand my portfolio, and I’ve been thinking about starting my own company,” Ginger said.

  “You should do that, Gin. You would be amazing. I know that for a fact. If you’re thinking about it, do it,” Gene said.

  Ginger stood and held her arms out for a hug. She waited until she held Gene tightly and whispered in her ear, “You take your own advice, slugger.” She pulled back, smiling.

  “Alright, let me in there,” Charlotte said, bumping Ginger with her hip and wrapping her arms around Gene.

  “You’re amazing, beautiful, talented, and just everything I could want in a friend. Don’t be a stranger and if you need anything, you give me a call,” Charlotte said, kissing her on both cheeks before hugging her tightly. “Now,” she said, looking at her phone, “I’ve got a go. My Uber is here. I’ll text you when my flight lands.”

  Charlotte moved to hug Ginger and Sheila stepped up to hug Gene. “It was really great to see you,” she said with a smile. “I am so glad to see you’re finally happy.”

  Gene could see the sincerity in her eyes and she felt it in her heart. It was Sheila who had told her she was strong enough to open her own garage, Sheila who she called for strength to actually file the divorce papers, and Sheila who painted the mural on the outside of the shop that looked like sexy biker chicks fixing cars and made the Lady Parts name stand out.

  “Thank you, Sheila. I am,” Gene said, happy to actually mean it, “and you helped me be that.”

  “Keep making you happy. You deserve it,” Sheila said, hugging her before stepping away. She and Ginger drove down together from Chicago and needed to get on the road so they could rest on Sunday before going to work on Monday.

  “I’ll see you girls around,” Gene said, walking with her old friends to the front door.

  7

  Sunday Gene rested, and she needed it. The weekend had been very eventful. She felt like she hadn’t slept in days. Brunch was emotionally gratifying but mentally exhausting. She barely managed to get her car from the bar and on the drive home before falling asleep again. Thankfully the garage was closed Sundays. When Monday rolled around, she was ready, mentally and physically to get focused and back to her business. She was determined to make it work.

  Around noon, Thomas, her receptionist, yelled at her from his spot at the front desk, “You’ve got a package, Gene.”

  She had holed up in her office, trying to set her books straight without much progress. Arnold’s little stunt cost more than she thought. She was running simulations and projections of sales, coupon offers, and a car wash fundraiser where half of the proceeds went to an organization and the other half, she kept for the business to see just how long it would take her to get in the black. The numbers were clear, she needed to buy back the other half of her stocks. Without it, no amount of money could keep her afloat before she went bankrupt. Arnold’s stocks were hemorrhaging her dream right before her eyes.

  “Well bring it here,” Gene yelled back and continued reading through her numbers. They were starting to blur on the paper, and she wasn’t sure if it was because she was tired or because she needed glasses. She had hoped working it by hand and on the computer would show her if and where a number was out of place. She refused to believe she was that deep in debt.

  “You expecting something?” Thomas said, coming around the corner lugging a heavy box and setting it down on her desk.

  “Nope. How do you know it’s not another car part?” she said, looking up at him with annoyed curiosity. He was acting like he didn’t know what to do with packages. They were always scanned, matched to the barcode in Lady Parts system, then placed in the back of the garage.

  “Because it didn’t match anything we had in our systems and it came with a note.”

  “Ok. I’ll bite. Hand it here,” she said, holding her hand out.

  Thomas handed her the sealed envelope and stepped back, waiting, as if she’d announce who she was getting packages from.

  “Do you mind?” she said and gestured for him to leave. She
didn’t blame his curiosity. She had never received personal mail at the garage before, not even on her opening day when she thought Arnold would send something, but she wasn’t going to let Thomas in on whatever Freaky Friday shit was happening to her.

  He rolled his eyes. “Fine. Don’t tell me who sent you the thing. Not like I was wondering anyway,” he said as he walked out.

  “Close the door behind you,” she said, and he took a step backward, closing it with a little more force than necessary.

  She took a deep breath and slid her finger underneath the flap, tearing the crease of the white envelope that had only her name handwritten in a strange mixture of print and cursive across the front.

  There was a folded card with a smiley face drawn on the front. The face was made of tiny screws, bolts, wrenches as eyes, a hammer for a nose, and pliers as the mouth, which made her laugh.

  Inside a short message was scrawled.

  You don’t strike me as a flowers kind of girl. Hope I guessed right.

  Liam.

  With wide eyes, she stood and cut the tape holding the box together with scissors from her desk. What could it be? Excitement had her ripping the tape remnants apart, unfolding the box to find a smaller box.

  What is this?

  She pulled the box out first and read the sticker. “Schwaben European Essentials Toolkit.” She pulled it out of the box, giddy to see all that was inside it and gasped when she opened it. “Oh my god.”

  It was perfect and hers. The little booklet said it was a specialty universal tool kit that came with a six-piece screwdriver kit. “A one-stop shop to pick up all the special torx, triple square, and hex bits you need to keep your car where it should be ... on the road. Wow.”

  Her heart was racing as she took the tools out one by one interested to see how they were made. Her mind couldn’t help thinking of all the things she could fix with them. She was ashamed her next thought was gratitude for tools she didn’t have the money to buy. Thankfully, Liam’s card included his phone number.