Playing With Fire

by Mary Larkin

  ‘Fair enough. Jim Brady will just have to look out for himself, then.’

  Once more he drew her into his arms and she willingly lifted her face for his kisses.

  After that it was no holds barred and Susan felt loved and desired. He didn’t overstep the mark once, but during their stay at Enniskillen his attention was passionate and loving, and all thoughts of Jim Brady melted into insignificance, at least for the time being.

  Her grandmother gave Susan her blessing. When they were making their farewells on Monday morning she whispered in her ear, ‘I hope to hear of a wedding in the not too distant future, girl. Donald is a fine young man and it’s obvious he cares for William as well as you, and that’s most important for your future happiness.’

  Whether Susan put Jim wise to the situation, Donald did not know nor did he care. She went for driving lessons with Jim as usual during the week. On Tuesday night Trevor took Donald to Dunmore Park to the grey-hound racing and on Thursday night they visited a few of the city-centre pubs. Thus he was out late both nights and returned when Jim had long departed, so he was not tempted to spy on Susan and Jim in the car again.

  Donald was quite confident about his chances with Susan. The only snag, as far as he could see, was that he would be here such a short time, while Jim would have much longer to win her over. How would Susan react if they all went to the Orpheus on Saturday night? Donald smiled at the idea. She would probably flirt with both of them and he would be none the wiser.

  Donald was alone with William when a car pulled up to the front of the house on Friday. Trevor was at work and Susan and her mother had gone shopping in preparation for Alison coming home the next day, leaving Donald babysitting. Lifting the child up in his arms, he entered the hall and waited for a knock on the door. To his surprise a key turned in the lock and a young blonde girl with big sparkling blue eyes stepped inside. She set down the suitcase she was carrying and beamed at him.

  ‘Hello. You must be Donald,’ she said. ‘I’m Alison, Susan’s sister.’

  Donald was struck dumb, such was the effect this girl was having on him. Shifting William on to his left arm, he clasped the small, firm hand offered to him and, unable to find his voice, nodded in greeting, still holding her hand.

  Embarrassed at his reaction, Alison gently withdrew her hand and gave her attention to the child. ‘And how’s my lovely wee nephew?’ she crooned and stretched out her arms for him, hugging him close. ‘Oh, how I’ve missed you.’

  To Donald’s relief Graham staggered in, weighed down with parcels. ‘Hello, Donald. Nice to see you again. I do declare Alison has brought twice as much back with her as she had going.’ Dropping the parcels, he approached Donald with hand outstretched.

  ‘You’re looking well, Graham,’ Donald greeted him.

  ‘You too, Donald. You too.’

  ‘Ah, but I haven’t been in a car crash and, may I say, what a car to crash in!’

  Graham grinned, displaying a flash of even white teeth set in a tanned face. ‘Thank God it was the car that was a write off and not me. It was touch and go for a while, you know, whether or not I’d ever walk again. But I must admit this holiday has done me all the good in the world. The weather down south was marvellous for a change and we spent most of the time lying about in the sun. We did, however, manage a tour of the Ring of Kerry. The scenery was out of this world. Is there no one else at home?’

  ‘Susan and her mother are in town doing a bit of shopping. They weren’t expecting you until tomorrow.’

  ‘That’s Alison’s fault. She wants me to take her to the Orpheus tomorrow night, now that I’m steadier on my feet. If the truth be known, I think it’s just so she can show off her tan. Will you be going to the dance?’

  ‘As far as I know, we are going to a dance in somewhere called the Floral Hall.’

  ‘Oh, that’s up at Hazelwood, near the zoo. Is it a ticket do?’

  ‘Yes, it was Jim who got the tickets.’

  ‘I’ll give him a ring and see if he can get another two. But look, Donald, I’ll have to rush on now. I’ve Mam and Dad waiting in the car. I’ll see you when I come back later for Alison.’

  ‘I look forward to it.’

  The door closed on Graham, and Donald drew a deep breath before joining Alison in the lounge. She was kneeling on the floor playing with William and his heart lurched in his breast at the beauty of her. He should have been prepared for this, he chastised himself. Hadn’t Susan intimated that her sister was beautiful?

  ‘Is anything wrong?’ she asked, a puzzled frown ruffling a smooth brow. ‘You needn’t worry about giving up your room, you know. I’ll be staying at Graham’s while you’re here.’

  Glad that she had given him an excuse for his awkwardness, he smiled. ‘Are you sure it’ll be no bother?’

  ‘No bother at all! There’s no shortage of rooms in his house.’

  William started to whimper and Alison asked anxiously, ‘Is he due a feed?’

  A glance at his watch and Donald cried, ‘Lord, yes. I’ll just heat a bottle for him.’

  ‘You look after him and I’ll attend to the bottle.’

  As if drawn by a magnet, he followed her into the kitchen, William in his arms.

  She glanced over her shoulder at him. ‘Are you enjoying yourself here?’

  ‘Yes, I’m having a marvellous time. I’ve been all over and seen some wonderful places. Of course there’s lots I haven’t seen, but time goes by so quickly. Last weekend we visited your grandparents in Enniskillen. We had a great time.’

  ‘I enjoy going there too. What did you think of the country pubs? I love them.’

  ‘I enjoyed them immensely. We have working men’s clubs over in England and I must say they put on some marvellous acts in their concert rooms. A lot of Irish groups and comedians are very popular. The two fiddlers playing in the pub last Saturday would go down a treat over there. They’d have the women up dancing on the tables. I thoroughly enjoyed the Irish music and the sing-songs. It was smashing.’

  ‘I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.’ She tested the bottle on the inside of her wrist. ‘There you are. Will you give it to him, while I unpack and sort out some fresh clothes to take to Graham’s house tonight?’

  He held William out to her. ‘First, let me carry those cases upstairs for you.’ He was already halfway across the hall, but paused when struck by a thought. ‘Where will I put them?’

  ‘Just dump them in the spare room at the end of the landing for the time being.’

  Once away from the effect her presence was having on him, Donald sat on the edge of the bed in the spare room and tried to justify his behaviour. What was he playing at? He had practically convinced Susan they were meant for each other and here he was drooling over her sister. And that very same sister was engaged to Graham, and Jim was still clinging to the hope that Susan would marry him. Even if she did decide to marry Jim, that wouldn’t clear the way for him and Alison; there was still Graham to consider. Why would she look at him anyway? He was hardly God’s gift to women. What a mess! He had better get a grip, before he made a complete idiot of himself. Rising to his feet, he drew a deep breath and exhaled slowly to steady his nerves, before descending the stairs.

  Now that he had his emotions under some semblance of control he found Alison easy to get on with. She kept the conversation going, asking after her relatives in England and how her grandparents were faring in Enniskillen, and how he was getting on with her father. Donald was not to know that Alison was usually very quiet and reserved and it was nerves that put her in such a talkative mood. This big fellow made her feel uneasy; albeit in the nicest possible kind of way, she still felt uneasy.

  After dinner that evening, Susan sat on the bed and watched her sister pack some things to take to Graham’s. ‘Did you have a nice time?’ she asked.

  ‘Very quiet, but I enjoyed myself. It gave me and Graham a chance to get to know each other.’

  ‘With his parents there?’ Susan’s voice w
as sceptical.

  ‘Don’t sound so surprised, Susan. They were very understanding and took themselves off for hours at a time. And the hotel was marvellous, great food and plenty of entertainment each evening. I think Graham and I will be very happy together.’

  ‘What about Graham? Is his walking getting any better?’

  ‘He’s coming along fine. He even manages to shuffle round the dance floor now. Are you going to the Orpheus tomorrow night?’

  Susan shook her head. ‘We’re going to the Floral Hall. Victor Sylvester and his orchestra are playing there, and Jim and I thought it would . . .’

  Alison’s eyes widened. ‘Oh, is the big romance back on again?’

  ‘I’m not sure yet, but in the meantime he has been giving me driving lessons.’

  ‘I see.’ Alison smiled wisely. ‘Is this dance a ticket-only do?’

  ‘Victor Sylvester? What do you think? However, Donald says that when Graham heard about it, he said he would ring Jim to see if he could possibly get two extra tickets.’

  ‘You won’t mind us tagging along?’

  ‘Not in the slightest. Anything new on your wedding front?’

  ‘No date set yet, if that’s what you mean, but it’ll be in the not too distant future. Graham wants a place of his own.’

  ‘Will it be before Christmas, do you think?’

  ‘I really don’t know. Why all this sudden interest?’

  ‘Well, you see, I’ve also had a proposal of marriage ... two, actually.’

  ‘Huh! Two? You’re not letting the grass grow under your feet, are you?’ Alison sat down on the bed beside Susan and gazed at her wide-eyed.

  Susan laughed at her sister’s amazement. ‘Yes, two. Jim is going to America on contract for his firm and he wants me to marry him and go with him. He would have to leave here in about six or seven weeks, so my wedding would be a hurried affair in the registry office. I don’t want to spoil your plans, so what do you think? Do you think it would interfere with your wedding plans if I were to marry soon?’

  ‘Don’t you worry your head about me! There’s no chance of us getting married in a couple of months’ time. Having said that, I don’t want it too near Christmas, either. But I’m sure Graham won’t mind waiting until the spring. Easter would be nice, so it would. But I’ll say this much: we’ll all sure as hell miss William. We kept talking about him the whole time we were away.’

  This admission surprised Susan. ‘Did you indeed?’

  ‘He’s so quiet that you might find this hard to believe, but Graham is very fond of him.’

  Hiding her concern, Susan replied, ‘That’s the snag! Jim wants me to leave William with Mam and Dad. It will only be for a year.’

  ‘Huh! He’s a gag! There’s no way you’ll leave William for a week, let alone a year. Why, as far as a baby is concerned, it’s a lifetime. I know I wouldn’t chance it! Although, mind you, Graham and I would be delighted to help out.’

  Susan’s heart dropped. Her sister was just confirming all her own misgivings.

  ‘You said you’d had two proposals?’ Alison prompted her.

  ‘Yes, Donald thinks we could make a go of it, and I must say he is more attached to William than Jim is.’

  Alison rose to her feet and, crossing the floor, opened a drawer and rummaged unnecessarily about in it. Why did the mention of Donald make her blush? Had Susan noticed? When Susan and her mother had returned from town she had stayed as far away from him as she could, for he made her feel so uncomfortable. During dinner she had been aware of his frequent probing glances and now Susan had intimated that she might marry him. Could she bear to have Donald for a brother-in-law? Turning to face her sister, she said, ‘But you love Jim, don’t you?’

  ‘I don’t really know any more. To tell you the truth, I’m all mixed up.’

  ‘For heaven’s sake, Susan, you used to be nuts about him! When you first fell out I thought you’d die of a broken heart. He was all you ever talked about.’

  ‘I know, but he was my first love and I always imagined your first romance is always in Technicolor, as it were. You must know what I mean? Graham’s your first love. You see, I’ve grown up now. I’d never let a man get a grip like that on me again. I’m also very attracted to Donald. He’s one of the best, and such fun to be with.’

  Alison was at a loss to understand her sister’s reasoning. She didn’t know what she meant about your first love being in Technicolor. All she knew was that she had envied the deep, sensual magnetism between her sister and Jim Brady. It had been there in the air all around them. She wished she could feel that way about Graham, but so far it hadn’t happened. As yet the ground hadn’t even shivered - let alone moved - when she was in his company.

  ‘Just be careful, Susan,’ she warned gently. ‘You and Jim were very committed to each other at one time.’ The sound of the doorbell brought her to attention. ‘That’ll be Graham. Will you go down and talk to him till I finish off here?’

  It was reluctantly that Susan left the room and descended the stairs. She had seen Graham just once since that awful night at the Orpheus and he’d looked dreadful. How would he look now? More importantly, how would he behave? Would he still live up to his promise? It was her mother who crossed the hall and opened the door.

  Giving him a warm hug, she said, ‘Graham, it’s wonderful to see you. You do look so much better.’

  ‘Thank you, Rachel. I must confess I do feel much better now. Almost back to my old self, as a matter of fact.’

  ‘That’s good to hear, son. Come into the lounge, Donald and Trevor are there.’

  ‘Thanks, Rachel. I’ll just have a quick word with Susan first.’

  He stood at the foot of the wide staircase and watched Susan descend, a sad smile on his face. She looked lovely to him, and putting a hand on each shoulder he kissed her lightly on the cheek. ‘You’re looking very attractive, if I may say so.’

  She smiled into his eyes, seeking reassurance. ‘You can pay me compliments like that any time you feel like it.’

  His hold on her tightened. ‘Ah, Susan, there’s so much I would like to say to you. If only . . .’

  Dismayed, Susan whispered warningly, ‘Graham, remember your promise . . . please.’

  Slowly he released his hold on her. ‘Forgive me and don’t worry. I don’t intend breaking my word. It hasn’t been easy, you know, staying away. It’s so long since I last saw you.’ Seeing that she was becoming agitated, he said gently, ‘Don’t look so worried. I’ll behave. Where is that lovely wee son of yours?’

  ‘He’s asleep, so he is.’

  Unheard by Susan, Alison was descending the stairs. Her voice reached them. ‘Are you staying for a while, Graham?’

  ‘I certainly am. I want to renew Donald’s acquaintance, and I’m hoping Susan will let me have a look in on her son.’

  ‘Of course she will. I can see a big difference in him in just two weeks and it’s much longer since you’ve set eyes on him. Take him up, Susan, and I’ll make some coffee.’

  Slowly Susan retraced her steps, followed by Graham. ‘You’ve lost a bit of weight,’ he admonished her.

  ‘Just a little. I want to be slim if I decide to get married.’ She had reasoned that the sooner he knew her plans, the better. Shock made his step falter and he gripped the banister tightly. Concerned, she swung round to face him. ‘Are you all right? Is it your back?’

  Pain in his voice, he retorted, ‘Do you care?’

  ‘Look, Graham, you know I don’t wish you any harm.’ She had reached the door of the nursery and gently pushed it open. He preceded her into the room and stood looking down on his son.

  He was overcome at the sight of the chubby, pink cheeks and long, curly lashes. ‘Alison’s right. He has grown. It’s not fair, you know, Susan. You’re breaking my heart with all this secrecy.’

  ‘Look, for the last time he isn’t yours.’ Fear of being overheard made her keep her voice low, but it was tight with anger and he hastened to pacify
her.

  ‘Don’t worry. I’ll stick to my word.’ With a gentle touch on the baby’s head he pushed abruptly past her and descended the stairs.

  Susan stood by the cot looking blindly down at her child, her mind in turmoil. How could she ever contemplate leaving William to grow under Graham’s suspicious, probing eye for a whole year? She hadn’t even considered that angle! All she had worried about was William forgetting her. There was no way she could marry Jim. She had been daft even to consider it. She must tell him at the first possible opportunity; not keep him waiting and hoping in vain. Good! That was one decision taken out of her hands. She would tell him at the dance tomorrow night, in case she was tempted to change her mind if she waited much longer.

  Having made up her mind about Jim, Susan felt bereft. She realised now that she had intended marrying him all along. If that was the case, why was she stringing Donald along? As insurance against unforeseen hitches? Besides, she did care a lot for Donald! As he had implied, they would make a good couple. If they did marry, she would make him a good, faithful wife and William would be reared over in Darlington, well out of harm’s way. But not too far away for her parents to visit any time they felt like it.

  Jim managed to get another two tickets for the dance. It was a special occasion, with Victor Sylvester and his orchestra playing. A big enough occasion for Susan to wear her new ruby dress. She tried it on once again. Tonight, as she examined her reflection in the mirror, she didn’t feel in the least bit attractive in it. She had hardly slept a wink the night before, and there were dark shadows under her eyes. She felt depressed and dreaded telling Jim the bad news. Slowly she removed the dress. What a waste! Would she ever wear it? Perhaps at another time in the future she might feel more comfortable in it and wear it for Donald. But not tonight! Not when she was sending her beloved Jim away for good; never again to feel his strong arms around her. Thank God Donald would be there to console and support her. What would she do without his understanding? He was her mentor indeed.