Wild Rugged Daddy_A Single Daddy Mountain Man Romance

by Sienna Parks

  Today gave me the clarity I needed.

  It’s time to go.

  SAVANNAH

  I run as fast as my legs will take me, the warm Texas air assaulting my lungs with every breath, the smell of bluebonnets invading my senses. It’s strange to smell something so sweet when everything around you is falling apart. Somehow, I thought it would be different—I had a kernel of hope the day of the opening, but the moment Maddox announced who I was to the entire town, I knew in my heart that Jax couldn’t get past it.

  I ran after him that day, the way I’m doing now, in hopes that he’ll hear my words. We never sat down to talk that night, and every night since, I’ve been fighting the urge to turn up on his doorstep and beg for another chance.

  The hard grass chafes my skin, but nothing is going to stop me. I thought I had time—that we’d figure it all out, but A.B. just called me frantically shouting at me to stop him. At first I panicked and thought someone had been in an accident, but the second she uttered his name—I knew.

  “Get in the car and go talk to him. Time’s up. He’s leaving tonight. He just met with Mad and said he’s going to college.”

  “I can’t. This was his dream. I’m not going to take that away from him. I’ve already hurt him enough.”

  “As the person who left to pursue my dreams at college, I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty that he would change his mind in a heartbeat if you ask him to stay.”

  “No! He deserves a fresh start.”

  “Fine. But you need to say goodbye. You’ll hate yourself if you don’t.”

  I knew she was right. I grabbed my keys and headed for my car, but the damn thing wouldn’t start. The gods were conspiring against me because there was no one on the ranch to give me a ride to Jax’s apartment. There’s always someone at Mustang, but today it was like a ghost town. So, without a rational thought in my head, I took off running through the fields toward town. I’ve been running for twenty minutes now, and it’s as if I’m going backward. Every step feels further away from him.

  My mind is racing wondering what the hell I’m going to say to him—or worse—what if he already left, and I missed my chance? I need to tell him I’m happy for him, and I don’t want him to look back with any regrets about us. My only regret is that I wasn’t honest with him from the beginning. If I had been, maybe things would be different now. Maybe I’d be moving with him to support him on this journey.

  The field ends abruptly making way for the winding country roads of Kingsbury Falls. A truck comes screaming to a halt as I stumble across the road in my haste. Life has a funny way of repeating itself. I stare into the eyes of the driver willing him to get out the truck and talk to me.

  “What the hell are you doing?” He slams the door behind him and strides toward me grabbing me by the arms. “You could have gotten yourself killed!”

  “Would you care, Jackson? You’re on your way out of town right now… and you had no intention of coming to say goodbye, did you?”

  “Those are two different things. Of course, I don’t want you dead. How could you say that? You know how I feel… felt about you.” His correction splinters my heart.

  “I couldn’t let you go…”

  “And that’s why I didn’t want to say goodbye. It’s hard enough leaving Maddox, A.B., and Rae behind. Seeing you would’ve taken every ounce of strength I had… the strength I need to walk away from you. I have to do this now, or I never will.” There’s longing in his eyes as they dart to my lips.

  “I was going to say, I couldn’t let you go without saying goodbye. I was on my way to your apartment.”

  “Why didn’t you drive?”

  “My car wouldn’t start.”

  “So you were running in ninety-degree heat?”

  “Yes. Jax, I know I’ve made more mistakes than I can count, but I would never ask you to stay here for me. You were born to be a vet, and I want you to follow your heart.” My voice begins to crack as I force myself to continue. “I want you to have the most amazing life, and find someone who deserves your love. You should have all those things and more. Please, don’t let what happened between us make you bitter or hold you back. You are the most amazing man I’ve ever known, and I will love you until my dying breath. Believe you can be extraordinary.”

  I’m grateful the field is at my back allowing me to disappear into the long grass before he gets back in his truck and leaves me for good. My legs are weak, but I push them as hard as I can. Tears are streaming down my cheeks, and it feels like a hole has been punched through my chest. His voice echoes through the trees before his hand wraps around my wrist.

  “Goddammit, Savannah. Why did you have to say all that? I wanted to leave thinking that I could stop loving you. I needed to believe there would be a day, an hour, a minute that I didn’t think about how much I love you, even though I want to hate you.”

  “Jackson.” His name is a strangled plea—begging for his forgiveness.

  “Goddamn you.” The words die on his lips as they crash down on mine. “You ran away from me once in this field, I can’t let you do it again.” His kiss is rough, hard, and filled with desire. Our lips are locked as we stagger toward tree cover. The engine is still running in his truck in the middle of the road, but we couldn’t care less.

  “God, Jackson, I’ve missed you so much.” He doesn’t speak as he pulls his t-shirt over his head and reaches for mine. The moment his hands cup my breasts, all rational thought leaves me in a long, satisfied moan. I tug on his jeans pushing them just low enough to wrap my fist around his cock—rock hard and ready to take me.

  He pushes my skirt up my hips and tears my panties from my body with the animalistic urgency I crave. Pulling me up into his arms, he lowers us into the long grass before pushing inside me. I’m bombarded by sensations—the dry, harsh grass pricking my back, the smooth warmth and weight of Jackson’s body looming over me, and the excruciatingly transcendent feeling of him thrusting inside me.

  “Fuck!” His body shudders as he stills himself and takes a breath to compose himself. “You’re mine, Savannah. Do you hear me?” He starts to move hammering into me with every broken word. “You’ve. Always. Been. Mine.” His lips find mine, his tongue devouring meclaiming me. “Say it!”

  “I’m yours. Jax, I’ll always be yours.” My touch is greedy—I’ve been starved for so long—my nails rake down his back causing him to cry out. It only fuels him unleashing an unbridled passion that takes my breath away.

  We chase our release, our bodies slick with sweat, and we move together in perfect sync. As my muscles begin to tighten, Jax slips his hand between us, his thumb rubbing circles over my clit. When I can’t hold back the impending ecstasy, I kiss him with all the pain, hurt, and love in my heart. “God, Jax, I’m gonna cum. Please, I need you to cum with me.” The groan that escapes his chest is my undoing. My body convulses beneath him sending him into the tailspin of his own release.

  “Fuck! Yes… Savannah!” My name is a prayer on his lips, and I bask in the glow of watching him cum riding out the aftershocks of my orgasm. His body relaxes, the weight of him crushing me, but I don’t want him to move. I’d rather keep this moment of contentment for one more minute, rather than live a life without him.

  “I love you, Jackson.”

  We lie in silence, our heavy breathing the only sounds for miles around, but eventually, our perfect moment must end. Jax grabs my clothes and dresses me with reverence before pulling his t-shirt on and tucking my torn panties in his back pocket. His eyes are filled with love… and sadness.

  “Savannah.”

  “Don’t say it. Just go.” I hold his gaze as my tears begin to fall. “I know you need to go.” I place my hand on his chest letting myself memorize the beat of his heart on my fingertips. I close my eyes and just like that… he’s gone. I can’t watch him drive away from me—it’s too painful. When I hear the truck door slam shut, I fall to my knees and let out everything I’ve been holding inside. I sob unt
il my lungs hurt and my knees bleed from the harsh Texas grass.

  It’s over.

  “Sav, do you want something to eat?” A.B. creeps into my bedroom. It’s only five o’clock, but I closed the drapes and pulled the cover over myself the minute I got back to the house. Mad tried to ask if I was okay, but I couldn’t face any of them. The darkness is my only solace. I know I did the right thing letting him go, but it hurts so bad I’m struggling to breathe.

  “No, thank you.” My body shifts as she sits on the bed, her hand reaching out to stroke my back.

  “He’ll be back. It’s not forever, it’s just… for now.” I twist to see her face in the light creeping through the crack in the door.

  “I know, and I wanted him to go and do this for himself, but it hurts. I love him, and now it’s over. He’s moved on.” She catches a glimpse of my legs and the blood-stained sheets.

  “Oh God, Sav. You need to let me clean those up. What the hell happened?”

  “I ran.” It’s all I can say before collapsing into her arms and holding on for dear life. I’ve never needed anyone. I learned to rely on myself from a young age, and this is a foreign feeling. He made me need him, and now he’s gone.

  “Did you say goodbye?”

  “Yes, and now I’m alone.”

  “You are not alone. We’re family, and we love you.”

  “But, Jax has been part of your family his whole life. I don’t want you to have to choose.”

  “There is no choice to be made. You are Mad’s sister. Nothing will ever change that. Jackson has to do this, but I promise you, he’ll come back when he’s ready, and if you still want to be together, then it’s all going to work out.”

  “How do you know?”

  “I’m walking proof that second chances can work. I married the love of my life, and if our paths hadn’t diverged for a while, I wouldn’t have the most amazing daughter in the world. Life finds a way. For now, we need to take care of you.” Exhaustion sets in, and I slump back down on the bed.

  “I just need to rest for a while. I’ll come out and eat later.”

  “Okay.” She stands to leave, but I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts.

  “Please, don’t go.” She nods and without another word crawls up beside me and runs her fingers through my hair. It’s comforting—soothing my mind just long enough for me to drift into a fitful slumber.

  My head is pounding, and my eyes burn as I try to open them. The house is quiet, and A.B. is no longer beside me. The room is pitch black, and as I feel around for my phone to check the time, I realize my legs are bandaged.

  “She cleaned the wounds and dressed them while you were sleeping.” I must be dreaming, or maybe I’m mistaking Mad’s voice for his. I rub my eyes and let them adjust to the darkness, but all I can see is a shadow sitting in the corner of the room with his head in his lap.

  “Maddox?”

  “No, it’s me.” I try to move, but my body protests fixing me to the spot. I’m dreaming. I have to be dreaming. The dip of the bed as he crawls up and over me feels so real as if I could reach out and touch him. With shaking hands, I caress the line of his jaw, the scruff scratching at my fingertips.

  Oh my God. I can feel him. He’s here. He’s real!

  “You left.”

  “I didn’t say goodbye. I got there and realized that I didn’t… I couldn’t say goodbye.”

  “I… you…” He cups my face in his hand, his eyes gentle and cautious.

  “I was an idiot.”

  “No, you weren’t.”

  “Yes. I finally found the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I let you go.” I’m lost for words. “Can you ever forgive me? I should have let you explain when I was in Chicago. And then when you came back… I was hurt, and I wanted to do the right thing for everybody.”

  “You don’t have to explain. You couldn’t deal with the ‘stepbrother’ label. I get it. I told you to go. I said goodbye.”

  “Is that what you want?”

  “Jax, I’ve caused enough damage in your life. I will not be the reason you don’t go to college.”

  “That’s not what I asked.”

  “What do you want from me? I told you the truth! I tried to stay away from you! I let you go even though it made me want to lay down and die.” I jump up from the bed, my body screaming at me in pain, but I can’t do it anymore. I can’t be around him and not be with him. “What more do you want from me?”

  “I want you to marry me! That’s why I came to Chicago that day. I had this ring in my pocket, and I was going to propose.” He holds the ring, but I can barely see in the dark. I feel around for the bedside lamp and switch it on.

  “You can’t do that! You can’t leave me and then come back with a ring.”

  “Savannah. I know I don’t deserve another chance. I’ve treated you terribly, but I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you. I got scared and confused.”

  “But you’re not confused anymore? I’m still your stepsister.” I’m so afraid to let him in, I defer to the anger that’s bubbling up inside me.

  “Goddammit! No, you’re not. I was wrong. I don’t give a fuck about that man. He’s dead to me, and he was never my father. I was wrong, and I will apologize as many times as it takes for you to forgive me and realize that I’m the man for you.”

  “You broke my heart, Jax. We break each other. That’s what we do.”

  “No. We’ve had difficult circumstances, but no matter what, don’t you ever say you broke me. You put me back together, Savannah Adams. You made me a better man. I love you, and nothing can change that.”

  “Don’t say those words to me.” He stands behind me, his breath warm on my neck.

  “I love you.”

  “Stop. My heart can’t take it.” His hands brush down my arms before clutching my hands.

  “I. Love. You. Savannah. Please, don’t give up on me.” I spin in his arms.

  “You gave up on me. You can’t just come in here and ask me to marry you. The answer is no.”

  “I…” His eyes are filled with tears begging for forgiveness.

  “Damn you, Jackson McKinney.” The weight that has been baring down on me lifts as I pull his lips to mine. I taste his tears, and my heart melts. Can I pass up my once in a lifetime person out of pride and stubbornness?

  “Marry me.”

  “No.” I hold him close—my heart is hammering in my chest. “We need to take it slow. There’s so much about me you don’t know. So much we need to talk through.”

  “So, you want us to date?”

  “Yes, but I want you to keep the ring. Maybe one day… I’ll say yes.”

  “I’ll take you any way you’ll have me.” He gives me a chaste kiss and scoops me into his arms. “Can I sleep next to you?” There’s hesitation in his voice. A strange juxtaposition to our explosive goodbye this morning.

  “Okay.”

  As we lie in the dark, I’m uneasy. This morning I wanted him to stay more than anything, but now that he’s here, I’m terrified that he’s going to resent me later if he stays.

  “Jax.”

  “Yes.”

  “I don’t want to be selfish. I want to be with you, but you can’t give up on college for me.”

  “I’m not. I know it will be long hours and a lot of work, and it’ll be hard for us to find time together, but I’m asking you to bear with me. I’ll make it work. I won’t give up on college… or you.”

  “Okay.”

  “Okay.” He wraps his arms around me pulling my back to his chest. His declaration is palpable in the room, but he doesn’t say another word. Instead, he holds me all night and long into the morning.

  JAX

  For the first time in my life, I made the right decision. I never thought I’d hear myself say it, but I’m happy I didn’t leave Kingsbury Falls. It would have been the worst mistake of my life, and even sadder, I’d be living eighteen-year-old A.B.’s mistakes.

  I was able to tra
nsfer to the University of Houston, and life is finally falling into place. I’m able to commute from here, and my advisor says I will be able to do a lot of the practical work on the ranch. I’m helping with the therapy center, but Savannah has been taking on the bulk of the responsibility, and she loves it.

  It’s been an adjustment for all of us. Mad is a great brother, and he loves having a little sister. In the beginning, he struggled seeing Savannah and me together. She moved into the ranch with them, and he saw how devastated she was when we’d broken up. He’s known me his whole life and before he knew who she was, he was rooting for things to work out for me. Now, he’s protective of his sister and trying to be a supportive friend, but I understand it’s hard for him.

  I had no idea she was nineteen when we first met. She told me she was working on a thesis, and she was drinking in Cardinals. It didn’t cross my mind to think for a second that she was under twenty-one. She’s mature for her age—losing a parent will do that to you. She’s been fending for herself for a long time. If she hadn’t lied, I wouldn’t have given her the chance to squirrel her way into my heart. She’s taught me that age is just a number. I’m attempting to reiterate that to Maddox at every available opportunity!

  “Mornin’.” Everyone looks up from the kitchen table, and I remember why we spend most nights at my apartment.

  “Uncle Jax! Aunt Savnanana has been telling me stories about Chicago. Can we go?” Savannah shakes her head. I think it will be a while before she is ready to go back there.

  “Umm… we’ll need to ask Daddy.”

  “Nice, douche.” If my start to the day wasn’t awkward enough, I managed to make it worse.

  “Morning, baby.” Savannah greets me with a kiss and a smile. “Would you like some bacon and eggs?”

  “I can get them.” Mad eyeballs me.

  “You bet your ass you can. She isn’t your maid.”

  “Are you going to get past this? I know she’s not my maid, and I’m well aware she’s your little sister. We’re together, and I’m not going anywhere.” He takes a deep breath allowing the tension to disperse from his shoulders.